--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d…" description: "\"“If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. Was that normal? I didn’t know. What I did know was that I ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg" --- # If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on… ![“If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. Was that normal? I didn’t know. What I did know was that I felt less prone to depression and more normal walking through Venice or staring out over the lake in Zurich. At home I wrestled continually with my…” quote by Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg) > ““If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. Was that normal? I didn’t know. What I did know was that I felt less prone to depression and more normal walking through Venice or staring out over the lake in Zurich. At home I wrestled continually with my moods. The black thing inside me gnawed like a rat at my self-esteem and self-confidence. I felt there was a happy person inside me too, who wanted to enjoy life, to be normal, but my feelings of self-loathing and the deep distrust I had towards my father wouldn’t allow that sunny person to come out. When the black thing had an iron grip on me, I couldn’t even look at my father: Did you do bad things to me when I was little? Like a line from a song stuck in your brain, the words ran through my head and never once came out of my mouth. Not that I needed to say what was in my mind. I was sure Father could read my thoughts in my moods, in the blank, dead stare of my eyes. It was hardly surprising that there was always an atmosphere of strain and awkwardness in the house, and the blame was always mine: Alice and her moods, Alice and her anorexia; Alice and her low self-esteem; Alice and her inescapable feelings of loss and emptiness.”” [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator struggles with deep self‑esteem issues, depressive moods, and a conflicted relationship with her father, feeling both a desire for normalcy and a pervasive inner darkness. **In simple terms:** Inner conflict between self‑loathing and a wish for normal happiness. Key Takeaway Recognize and address the inner critic to foster self‑compassion. Themes mental health family dynamics self‑esteem depression anorexia Mood reflective somber hopeful Type personal narrative psychological memoir When to use this quote - therapy sessions - journaling - support groups - mindfulness practice - family counseling Key Concepts psychodynamic conflict inner critic attachment anxiety Questions to Reflect On - How does your inner critic affect daily decisions? - What steps can you take to nurture the “sunny” part of yourself? A Different Perspective The narrative may over‑emphasize personal blame, overlooking systemic or relational factors that also shape mental health. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) [Anorexia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anorexia/) [Bad things](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bad-things/) [Child-sexual-abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/child-sexual-abuse/) [Depression](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/depression/) [Dissociation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dissociation/) [Dissociative](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dissociative/) [Dissociative-identity-disorder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dissociative-identity-disorder/) [Emotion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotion/) [Emotional](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emotional/) [Emptiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/emptiness/) [Enjoy life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/enjoy-life/) [Happy person](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happy-person/) [Incest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/incest/) [Mental health](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mental-health/) [Multiple personality disorder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/multiple-personality-disorder/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Saturday morning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/saturday-morning/) [Sexual abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sexual-abuse/) [Survivor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/survivor/) [Teenager](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/teenager/) [Trauma](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trauma/) ## Related quotes > [“People talk about dark moods, black moods, all the time. 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That's what they do when Alice is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/of-course-i-should-have-known-the-kids-would-pop-out-in-the/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“The word is dissociate. There is no 'a' before the 'ss'. People invariably say dis-a-ssociate, which, if you're suffering Disso-ciative Identity Disorder/Multiple Personality Disorder,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/the-word-is-dissociate-there-is-no-a-before-the-ss-people-invariably/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“When sleep came, I would dream bad dreams. Not the baby and the big man with a cigarette-lighter dream. Another dream. The castle dream.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/when-sleep-came-i-would-dream-bad-dreams-not-the-baby-and-the-big-man/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“Weird? Absurd? That’s how it seemed to me. I had these forces, these compunctions, these alternative personalities inside me, driving me. It was like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/weird-absurd-that-s-how-it-seemed-to-me-i-had-these-forces-these/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“PART 2 I felt doomed to death, But in a flash, Before I could reduce my thoughts To an emotion, I felt a mass…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/part-2-i-felt-doomed-to-death-but-in-a-flash-before-i-could-reduce-my/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“Why do I take a blade and slash my arms? Why do I drink myself into a stupor? Why do I swallow bottles of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/why-do-i-take-a-blade-and-slash-my-arms-why-do-i-drink-myself-into-a/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“It’s hard to feel supported when you can’t tell people everything. 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Tap.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/one-weekend-it-rained-for-48-hours-without-stopping-the-rain-beat/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“Some alters are what Dr Ross describes in Multiple Personality Disorder as 'fragments', which are 'relatively limited psychic states that express only one feeling,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/some-alters-are-what-dr-ross-describes-in-multiple-personality/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“Some alters are what Dr Ross describes in Multiple Personality Disorder as 'fragments'. which are 'relatively limited psychic states that express only one feeling,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/some-alters-are-what-dr-ross-describes-in-multiple-personality-2/) [Alice Jamieson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-jamieson/) > [“Just as sometimes I wondered if Grandpa had ever existed, sometimes I wondered if I truly existed myself. 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They will mirror your actions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hadinet-tekie/words-are-free-it-does-not-mean-you-should-abuse-them-be-kind-with/) [Hadinet Tekie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hadinet-tekie/) > [My illness is one often characterized by dramatic overspending - in my case through frenzied shopping sprees, credit card abuse, excessive hoarding of unnecessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-behrman/my-illness-is-one-often-characterized-by-dramatic-overspending-in-my/) [Andy Behrman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-behrman/) [Browse all 3,113 Abuse quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. Was that normal? I didn’t know. What I did know was that I felt less prone to depression and more normal walking through Venice or staring out over the lake in Zurich. At home I wrestled continually with my moods. The black thing inside me gnawed like a rat at my self-esteem and self-confidence. I felt there was a happy person inside me too, who wanted to enjoy life, to be normal, but my feelings of self-loathing and the deep distrust I had towards my father wouldn’t allow that sunny person to come out. When the black thing had an iron grip on me, I couldn’t even look at my father: Did you do bad things to me when I was little? Like a line from a song stuck in your brain, the words ran through my head and never once came out of my mouth. Not that I needed to say what was in my mind. I was sure Father could read my thoughts in my moods, in the blank, dead stare of my eyes. It was hardly surprising that there was always an atmosphere of strain and awkwardness in the house, and the blame was always mine: Alice and her moods, Alice and her anorexia; Alice and her low self-esteem; Alice and her inescapable feelings of loss and emptiness.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Alice Jamieson" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spend-three-hours-on-saturday/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Abuse" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-jamieson/if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spend-three-hours-on-saturday/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbb/alice-jamieson-21585_abuse_if-i-was-set-an-essay-on-friday-i-d-spen_172097.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If I was set an essay on Friday, I’d spend three hours on Saturday morning in the library. 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