--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You build your world around someone, and…" description: "\"“You build your world around someone, and then what happens when he disappears? Where do you go- into pieces, into atoms, into the arms of another man?..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d2/alice-hoffman-427_another-man_you-build-your-world-around-someone-and_432977.jpg" --- # You build your world around someone, and then what happens… ![“You build your world around someone, and then what happens when he disappears? Where do you go- into pieces, into atoms, into the arms of another man? You go shopping, you cook dinner, you work odd hours, you make love to someone else on June nights. But you're not really there, you're someplace…” quote by Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d2/alice-hoffman-427_another-man_you-build-your-world-around-someone-and_432977.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d2/alice-hoffman-427_another-man_you-build-your-world-around-someone-and_432977.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d2/alice-hoffman-427_another-man_you-build-your-world-around-someone-and_432977.jpg) > ““You build your world around someone, and then what happens when he disappears? Where do you go- into pieces, into atoms, into the arms of another man? You go shopping, you cook dinner, you work odd hours, you make love to someone else on June nights. But you're not really there, you're someplace else where there is blue sky and a road you don't recognize. If you squint your eyes, you think you see him, in the shadows, beyond the trees. You always imagine that you see him, but he's never there. It's only his spirit, that's what's there beneath the bed when you kiss your husband, there when you send your daughter off to school. It's in your coffee cup, your bathwater, your tears. Unfinished business always comes back to haunt you, and a man who swears he'll love you forever isn't finished with you until he's done.”” [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator reflects on loss and lingering presence of a departed lover, describing how memories infiltrate everyday life and haunt the living. **In simple terms:** Grief makes the past feel present in daily moments. Key Takeaway Allow space for grief and memory. Themes grief memory loss presence Mood melancholic introspective Type literary emotional When to use this quote - daily routine - parenting - cooking - travel Key Concepts spirituality psychology Questions to Reflect On - How do you honor memories without being trapped? - What rituals help integrate loss? A Different Perspective May romanticize the deceased, hindering healing. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Blue sky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/blue-sky/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Love forever](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love-forever/) [Unfinished business](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unfinished-business/) ## Related quotes > [Unfinished business always comes back to haunt you, and a man who swears he'll love you forever isn't finished with you until he's done.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/unfinished-business-always-comes-back-to-haunt-you-and-a-man-who/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [And then I painted it. I think my shadows made it look bad, but my family says its really awesome](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/and-then-i-painted-it-i-think-my-shadows-made-it-look-bad-but-my/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I got a statistic for you right now. Grab your pencil, Doug. There are five billion trees in the world. I looked it up.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-bradbury/i-got-a-statistic-for-you-right-now-grab-your-pencil-doug-there-are/) [Ray Bradbury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-bradbury/) > [“They have been sitting in this position since they were born, so they think these shadows are all there are. Imagine”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jostein-gaarder/they-have-been-sitting-in-this-position-since-they-were-born-so-they/) [Jostein Gaarder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jostein-gaarder/) > [To think of shadows is a serious thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victor-hugo/to-think-of-shadows-is-a-serious-thing/) [Victor Hugo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victor-hugo/) > [Most people think that shadows follow, precede or surround beings or objects. The truth is that they also surround words, ideas, desires, deeds, impulses…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elie-wiesel/most-people-think-that-shadows-follow-precede-or-surround-beings-or/) [Elie Wiesel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elie-wiesel/) > [You build your world around someone, and then what happens when he disappears? Where do you go-into pieces, into atoms, into the arms of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/you-build-your-world-around-someone-and-then-what-happens-when-he-2/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [Just because something is unspoken doesn't mean that it disappears.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/just-because-something-is-unspoken-doesn-t-mean-that-it-disappears/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [There was the blue sky above her and all those many roses, the ones that gave off the scent of cloves in the rain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/there-was-the-blue-sky-above-her-and-all-those-many-roses-the-ones/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“You ask me what it means to be irrelevant? The feeling is akin to visiting your old house as a wandering ghost with unfinished…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/azar-nafisi/you-ask-me-what-it-means-to-be-irrelevant-the-feeling-is-akin-to/) [Azar Nafisi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/azar-nafisi/) > [I feel unfinished business with the WBO title because that was my first loss when I went to New Zealand with Joseph Parker.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-ruiz-jr/i-feel-unfinished-business-with-the-wbo-title-because-that-was-my/) [Andy Ruiz Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-ruiz-jr/) > [“The British government in 1807 had issued the “Orders in Council,” which enforced a naval blockade against France, and with a shortage of seamen…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-river-editors/the-british-government-in-1807-had-issued-the-orders-in-council-which/) [Charles River Editors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-river-editors/) > [Your unfinished business of the past can hold you from moving forward to the future.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simphiwe/your-unfinished-business-of-the-past-can-hold-you-from-moving-forward/) [Simphiwe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simphiwe/) > [He looked at my lips. I suddenly found myself wanting to lick his. 'Yes,' he replied, his eyes going molten. My breath caught in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-macalister/he-looked-at-my-lips-i-suddenly-found-myself-wanting-to-lick-his-yes/) [Katie MacAlister](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-macalister/) > [From '86 until the summer of last year, wherever I went, people would say, You would have made a great James Bond! Weren't you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pierce-brosnan/from-86-until-the-summer-of-last-year-wherever-i-went-people-would/) [Pierce Brosnan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pierce-brosnan/) ## More by Alice Hoffman > [Women know things that men will never know. We keep the best secrets. We tell the best stories.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/women-know-things-that-men-will-never-know-we-keep-the-best-secrets/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“All of the quarters in his hand were tarnished. He had no idea that the silver in a man’s pockets always turns black if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/all-of-the-quarters-in-his-hand-were-tarnished-he-had-no-idea-that/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [But most important of all, she explained that it was all right to say 'No. I disagree.' that was a gift. I understood it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/but-most-important-of-all-she-explained-that-it-was-all-right-to-say/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“It was after dark when the woods were most filled with magic, when there were fireflies and the mist was rising from the streams.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/it-was-after-dark-when-the-woods-were-most-filled-with-magic-when/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“Never look back, that's what she's told herself. Don't think about swans or being alone in the dark. Don't think of storms, or lightning…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/never-look-back-that-s-what-she-s-told-herself-don-t-think-about/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [This was what it meant to be human, to know that time moved and all things changed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/this-was-what-it-meant-to-be-human-to-know-that-time-moved-and-all/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“She preferred cats to human beings and turned down every offer from the men who fell in love with her.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/she-preferred-cats-to-human-beings-and-turned-down-every-offer-from/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [I'm a really eclectic reader.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/i-m-a-really-eclectic-reader/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [It's not the lie that's the problem; it's the distance the lie forges between you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/it-s-not-the-lie-that-s-the-problem-it-s-the-distance-the-lie-forges/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“Her vision was going, but she could see him, the way people see clouds-beautiful, racing by, casting shadows.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/her-vision-was-going-but-she-could-see-him-the-way-people-see-clouds/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [That's why there are ten gates to pass through before you reach the garden. If life were easy there would be one gate. There…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/that-s-why-there-are-ten-gates-to-pass-through-before-you-reach-the/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“...the summer of the gypsy moths when all the trees in their yard were bare, the leaves chewed by caterpillars. You could hear crunching…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/the-summer-of-the-gypsy-moths-when-all-the-trees-in-their-yard-were/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“The best way to die is when you're living.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/the-best-way-to-die-is-when-you-re-living/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“Haylin was given a good talking-to by the headmaster and made to write a paper about workers’ rights, which he considered a privilege rather…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/haylin-was-given-a-good-talking-to-by-the-headmaster-and-made-to/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/my-darling-girl-when-are-you-going-to-realize-that-being-normal-is/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) [Explore all 571 Alice Hoffman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) ## More Another man quotes > [ Next came the Patent laws. These began in England in 1624; and, in this country, with the adoption of our constitution. Before then \[these?\],… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abraham-lincoln/next-came-the-patent-laws-these-began-in-england-in-1624-and-in-this/) [Abraham Lincoln](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abraham-lincoln/) > [“I took ten days off and by 11 o’clock on the first morning I had drunk fourteen cups of coffee, read all the newspapers…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeremy-clarkson/i-took-ten-days-off-and-by-11-o-clock-on-the-first-morning-i-had/) [Jeremy Clarkson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeremy-clarkson/) > [One day I woke up and Juventus wanted me, another Manchester United and what I know is that there were approaches made. But an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/raul-jimenez/one-day-i-woke-up-and-juventus-wanted-me-another-manchester-united/) [Raul Jimenez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/raul-jimenez/) > [“He often remembered his dad's admonition that envy was mental theft. If you coveted another man's possessions, Dad said, then you should be willing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/he-often-remembered-his-dad-s-admonition-that-envy-was-mental-theft/) [Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/) > [Never break another man's rice bowl.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/akio-morita/never-break-another-man-s-rice-bowl/) [Akio Morita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/akio-morita/) > [“One theory on cannibals, of course, is that they eat parts of their slain enemies to benefit from that person's greatest assets - their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-powell/one-theory-on-cannibals-of-course-is-that-they-eat-parts-of-their/) [Julie Powell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-powell/) > [I admire machinery as much is any man, and am as thankful to it as any man can be for what it does for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/i-admire-machinery-as-much-is-any-man-and-am-as-thankful-to-it-as-any/) [Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/) > [“If you aren't in love, Willow Vaughn, then my name isn't Miriam Brigham." Willow started out of her daydreaming and glanced up from the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlotte-mcpherren/if-you-aren-t-in-love-willow-vaughn-then-my-name-isn-t-miriam-brigham/) [Charlotte McPherren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlotte-mcpherren/) > [“One man accomplishment Is another mans failure.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anthony-sargent/one-man-accomplishment-is-another-mans-failure/) Anthony Sargent > [“Hell, I bet there's another man right now on the other side of this planet, standing in the pouring rain, fighting desperately for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/el-montes/hell-i-bet-there-s-another-man-right-now-on-the-other-side-of-this/) EL Montes > [The perception of what we as professors provide has changed. Constant and demanding e-mails are just another manifestation of what our society has become.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-payne/the-perception-of-what-we-as-professors-provide-has-changed-constant/) [Dan Payne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-payne/) > [Fighting, to me, seems barbaric. I don't really like it. I enjoy out-thinking another man and out-maneuvering him, but I still don't like to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sugar-ray-robinson/fighting-to-me-seems-barbaric-i-don-t-really-like-it-i-enjoy-out/) [Sugar Ray Robinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sugar-ray-robinson/) > [The single greatest pleasure that I have in doing ('Bizarre Foods') is when I meet families with 6, 7, 8-year-olds, or teenagers, who say,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-zimmern/the-single-greatest-pleasure-that-i-have-in-doing-bizarre-foods-is/) [Andrew Zimmern](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-zimmern/) > [One man's vulgarity is another man's lyric.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-marshall-harlan-ii/one-man-s-vulgarity-is-another-man-s-lyric/) [John Marshall Harlan II](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-marshall-harlan-ii/) > [“that of dealing death, of loosing another man’s soul and sending it down to hell. You want to savor it, to twist the blade…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-pressfield/that-of-dealing-death-of-loosing-another-man-s-soul-and-sending-it/) [Steven Pressfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-pressfield/) Browse all 1,112 Another man quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You build your world around someone, and then what happens when he disappears? Where do you go- into pieces, into atoms, into the arms of another man? You go shopping, you cook dinner, you work odd hours, you make love to someone else on June nights. But you're not really there, you're someplace else where there is blue sky and a road you don't recognize. If you squint your eyes, you think you see him, in the shadows, beyond the trees. You always imagine that you see him, but he's never there. It's only his spirit, that's what's there beneath the bed when you kiss your husband, there when you send your daughter off to school. 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