--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: What he was doing was actually a hundred…" description: "\"“What he was doing was actually a hundred times worse. He was telling her that he loved her, something he hadn't mentioned and may not have even known ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db6/alice-hoffman-427_telling_what-he-was-doing-was-actually-a-hundred_3165700.png" --- # What he was doing was actually a hundred times worse. He… ![“What he was doing was actually a hundred times worse. He was telling her that he loved her, something he hadn't mentioned and may not have even known when they were married. She used to whisper it to him sometimes, while he was fucking her, and he had to turn off his mind every time she did that…” quote by Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db6/alice-hoffman-427_telling_what-he-was-doing-was-actually-a-hundred_3165700.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db6/alice-hoffman-427_telling_what-he-was-doing-was-actually-a-hundred_3165700.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db6/alice-hoffman-427_telling_what-he-was-doing-was-actually-a-hundred_3165700.png) > ““What he was doing was actually a hundred times worse. He was telling her that he loved her, something he hadn't mentioned and may not have even known when they were married. She used to whisper it to him sometimes, while he was fucking her, and he had to turn off his mind every time she did that. For some reason that declaration had seemed like a curse to him back then; he couldn't even hear it spoken aloud”” [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A lover’s confession becomes a burden when it feels like a curse, highlighting how language can trap emotions. **In simple terms:** Words can imprison feelings when misunderstood. Key Takeaway Choose words that heal, not bind. Themes communication relationships language Mood melancholic introspective Type literary psychological When to use this quote - counseling - writing workshops - marital therapy Key Concepts psychology literature Questions to Reflect On - How do you untangle harmful declarations? - Can you reframe painful statements positively? A Different Perspective Changing deep‑seated emotional responses is difficult. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Married Used](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/married-used-554499/) [Telling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/telling/) [Telling Loved](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/telling-loved-414361/) [Time](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/time/) [Whisper Fucking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whisper-fucking-5740838/) [Worse Telling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/worse-telling-613181/) ## Related quotes > [My kids would not get in to bed every night without me telling them that I loved them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-vanderpump/my-kids-would-not-get-in-to-bed-every-night-without-me-telling-them/) [Lisa Vanderpump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-vanderpump/) > [Before I got married, I used to start prepping up for Diwali almost a month in advance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amrapali-gupta/before-i-got-married-i-used-to-start-prepping-up-for-diwali-almost-a/) [Amrapali Gupta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amrapali-gupta/) > [I love women. I mean, I'm married, but I used to get in all kinds of trouble.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-devito/i-love-women-i-mean-i-m-married-but-i-used-to-get-in-all-kinds-of/) [Danny DeVito](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danny-devito/) > [Nothing's worse than telling your family you got a pilot, hearing the pilot got picked up, and then finding out it's not in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dreama-walker/nothing-s-worse-than-telling-your-family-you-got-a-pilot-hearing-the/) [Dreama Walker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dreama-walker/) > [Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-breault/worse-than-telling-a-lie-is-spending-the-rest-of-your-life-staying/) [Robert Breault](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-breault/) > [Being misunderstood is grievous but worse still is telling all you know just because the facts would vindicate you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lorinda-frankenberry/being-misunderstood-is-grievous-but-worse-still-is-telling-all-you/) [Lorinda Frankenberry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lorinda-frankenberry/) > [I think there's nothing worse than telling actors what to do in front of everyone, because then on the next take, everyone's waiting to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-ayoade/i-think-there-s-nothing-worse-than-telling-actors-what-to-do-in-front/) [Richard Ayoade](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-ayoade/) > [One more thing: don’t feel bad for not telling me that you loved me. You didn’t need to say it. I knew all along…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-a-redmerski/one-more-thing-don-t-feel-bad-for-not-telling-me-that-you-loved-me/) [J.A. Redmerski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-a-redmerski/) > [“Eventually everyone came out of the water and for hours and hours and hours we lay under the tree and talked and read and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meg-rosoff/eventually-everyone-came-out-of-the-water-and-for-hours-and-hours-and/) [Meg Rosoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meg-rosoff/) > [I was skint, and I had to move back to my mum and dad's house, back into the room I shared with my brother…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ian-brown/i-was-skint-and-i-had-to-move-back-to-my-mum-and-dad-s-house-back/) [Ian Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ian-brown/) > [Tessa had begun to tremble. This is what she had always wanted someone to say. What she had always, in the darkest corner of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/tessa-had-begun-to-tremble-this-is-what-she-had-always-wanted-someone/) [Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/) > [Don't tell me you love me, when you don't even feel the same way, I promise you, you wouldn't like it if the person…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/don-t-tell-me-you-love-me-when-you-don-t-even-feel-the-same-way-i/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The essential sadness is to go through life without loving. But it would be almost equally sad to leave this world without ever telling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sunita-penny/the-essential-sadness-is-to-go-through-life-without-loving-but-it/) [Sunita Penny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sunita-penny/) > [“Dear Camryn, I never wanted it to be this way. I wanted to tell you these things myself, but I was afraid. I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-a-redmerski/dear-camryn-i-never-wanted-it-to-be-this-way-i-wanted-to-tell-you/) [J.A. Redmerski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-a-redmerski/) > [“You know the story in the bible? The one with the king and the two women fighting over the baby? Sure King Solomon. That's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephenie-meyer/you-know-the-story-in-the-bible-the-one-with-the-king-and-the-two/) [Stephenie Meyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephenie-meyer/) ## More by Alice Hoffman > [Women know things that men will never know. We keep the best secrets. We tell the best stories.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/women-know-things-that-men-will-never-know-we-keep-the-best-secrets/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“All of the quarters in his hand were tarnished. He had no idea that the silver in a man’s pockets always turns black if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/all-of-the-quarters-in-his-hand-were-tarnished-he-had-no-idea-that/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [But most important of all, she explained that it was all right to say 'No. I disagree.' that was a gift. I understood it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/but-most-important-of-all-she-explained-that-it-was-all-right-to-say/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“It was after dark when the woods were most filled with magic, when there were fireflies and the mist was rising from the streams.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/it-was-after-dark-when-the-woods-were-most-filled-with-magic-when/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“Never look back, that's what she's told herself. Don't think about swans or being alone in the dark. 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If life were easy there would be one gate. There…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/that-s-why-there-are-ten-gates-to-pass-through-before-you-reach-the/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“...the summer of the gypsy moths when all the trees in their yard were bare, the leaves chewed by caterpillars. You could hear crunching…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/the-summer-of-the-gypsy-moths-when-all-the-trees-in-their-yard-were/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“The best way to die is when you're living.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/the-best-way-to-die-is-when-you-re-living/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [“Haylin was given a good talking-to by the headmaster and made to write a paper about workers’ rights, which he considered a privilege rather…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/haylin-was-given-a-good-talking-to-by-the-headmaster-and-made-to/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) > [My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-hoffman/my-darling-girl-when-are-you-going-to-realize-that-being-normal-is/) [Alice Hoffman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) [Explore all 571 Alice Hoffman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-hoffman/) ## More Telling quotes > [When you put your hand on the Bible, you are saying something much stronger than just telling your peers that you're going to tell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lee-greenwood/when-you-put-your-hand-on-the-bible-you-are-saying-something-much/) [Lee Greenwood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lee-greenwood/) > [If we accept being talked to any kind of a way, then we are telling ourselves we are not quite worth the best. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-angelou/if-we-accept-being-talked-to-any-kind-of-a-way-then-we-are-telling/) [Maya Angelou](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-angelou/) > [Story is about pulling the reader in and a plot is a more externalized mechanism of revelation. A plot is more antic, more performative,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-enright/story-is-about-pulling-the-reader-in-and-a-plot-is-a-more/) [Anne Enright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-enright/) > [Telling a story of illness, one pulls a thread through a narrow opening flanked on one side by shame and the other by trivia.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-griffin/telling-a-story-of-illness-one-pulls-a-thread-through-a-narrow/) [Susan Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-griffin/) > [Sometimes you have to stop telling folks about themselves and leave it up to them to figure out where they went wrong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danielle-lobbins/sometimes-you-have-to-stop-telling-folks-about-themselves-and-leave/) [Danielle Lobbins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danielle-lobbins/) > [I never want to get caught up in praises. Never want to get caught up in people telling me how good I am.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarvis-landry/i-never-want-to-get-caught-up-in-praises-never-want-to-get-caught-up/) [Jarvis Landry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarvis-landry/) > [Each child’s story is worthy of telling. There shouldn’t be a sliding scale of death. The weight of it is crushing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anderson-cooper/each-child-s-story-is-worthy-of-telling-there-shouldn-t-be-a-sliding/) [Anderson Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anderson-cooper/) > [“A good threat is often more telling than a blow.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-r-r-martin/a-good-threat-is-often-more-telling-than-a-blow/) [George R.R. Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-r-r-martin/) > [Your job as a writer is to find storylines, narrative structures, and characters to show the things that you believe rather than saying them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philipp-meyer/your-job-as-a-writer-is-to-find-storylines-narrative-structures-and/) [Philipp Meyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philipp-meyer/) > [I don't think any crime in the world is greater than telling a child: You're no good at it..!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ritu-ghatourey/i-don-t-think-any-crime-in-the-world-is-greater-than-telling-a-child/) [Ritu Ghatourey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ritu-ghatourey/) > [I get a little tired of people telling me what might have been. I think I've done OK. I don't dwell on what might…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ken-griffey-jr/i-get-a-little-tired-of-people-telling-me-what-might-have-been-i/) [Ken Griffey Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ken-griffey-jr/) > [The one prediction that never comes true is, 'You'll thank me for telling you this.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/judith-martin/the-one-prediction-that-never-comes-true-is-you-ll-thank-me-for/) [Judith Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/judith-martin/) > [Everything, for me, is fueled off telling my story through music, because I have a lot to say, and it's some urgent things that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lil-b/everything-for-me-is-fueled-off-telling-my-story-through-music/) [Lil B](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lil-b/) > [What's David's role? David looks good, that's what David does. David looks good, and I'm the funny one, that's what I hear constantly. 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