--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: If you don't listen deeply, the…" description: "\"If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take place… [You have to be] willing to be changed by the person you're listening to, where you're not..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png" --- # If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take… ![“If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take place… [You have to be] willing to be changed by the person you're listening to, where you're not just waiting for a pause so you can say your thing, but you're actually letting them have an effect on you if they can.” quote by Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png) > “If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take place… \[You have to be\] willing to be changed by the person you're listening to, where you're not just waiting for a pause so you can say your thing, but you're actually letting them have an effect on you if they can.” [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Deep listening requires openness to being changed by the speaker. **In simple terms:** Listen to be changed. Key Takeaway Practice active, empathetic listening. Themes communication empathy growth Mood thoughtful inquisitive Type educational inspirational When to use this quote - counseling - team meetings - conflict resolution Key Concepts psychology interpersonal skills Questions to Reflect On - How often do you listen to learn? - What fears arise when you let go of your agenda? A Different Perspective Listening can be uncomfortable and vulnerable. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Communication](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/communication/) [Connections](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/connections/) [Pauses](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pauses/) ## Related quotes > [This is the LM pilot. I'd like to take this opportunity to ask every person listening in, whoever and wherever they may be, to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/buzz-aldrin/this-is-the-lm-pilot-i-d-like-to-take-this-opportunity-to-ask-every/) [Buzz Aldrin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/buzz-aldrin/) > [Speak less, listen deeply.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shri-radhe-maa/speak-less-listen-deeply/) [Shri Radhe Maa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shri-radhe-maa/) > [“You can never really know that Scriptures until you're willing to be changed by them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-hattaway/you-can-never-really-know-that-scriptures-until-you-re-willing-to-be/) [Paul Hattaway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-hattaway/) > [I guess it's one thing to play a character and relate to a character, and it's a lot closer to me than people might…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hailee-steinfeld/i-guess-it-s-one-thing-to-play-a-character-and-relate-to-a-character/) [Hailee Steinfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hailee-steinfeld/) > [People have to listen to somebody speak, that the person that you're listening to is saying the right stuff, and that's all that really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/damon-dash/people-have-to-listen-to-somebody-speak-that-the-person-that-you-re/) [Damon Dash](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/damon-dash/) > [You can never really know the scriptures until you're willing to be changed by them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brother-yun/you-can-never-really-know-the-scriptures-until-you-re-willing-to-be/) [Brother Yun](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brother-yun/) > [We cannot hope to bring about effective change unless we are willing to BE changed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-j-mouw/we-cannot-hope-to-bring-about-effective-change-unless-we-are-willing/) [Richard J. Mouw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-j-mouw/) > [If we look at the world around us, we see that we are conditioned to not listen deeply. Because isn't that what silence is?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adyashanti/if-we-look-at-the-world-around-us-we-see-that-we-are-conditioned-to/) [Adyashanti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adyashanti/) > [“Listening is one of the finest ways to demonstrate our love for another human being. How many marriages could be saved, friendships healed, careers…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-c-young/listening-is-one-of-the-finest-ways-to-demonstrate-our-love-for/) [Susan C. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-c-young/) > [When you listen deeply to a song, you find all the little sounds they use and subconsciously learn how to produce and mix.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rich-brian/when-you-listen-deeply-to-a-song-you-find-all-the-little-sounds-they/) [Rich Brian](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rich-brian/) > [When the situation seems most difficult, instead of struggling and depending on our own scheming, it is best to be quiet and listen deeply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-kang/when-the-situation-seems-most-difficult-instead-of-struggling-and/) [Albert Kang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-kang/) > [Learning to play is mostly about learning to hear, and learning to really listen deeply to sound in a musical way is a lifetime's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pat-metheny/learning-to-play-is-mostly-about-learning-to-hear-and-learning-to/) [Pat Metheny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pat-metheny/) > [Life is a luminous pause between two mysteries that are yet one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-jung/life-is-a-luminous-pause-between-two-mysteries-that-are-yet-one/) [Carl Jung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-jung/) > [Pause before you get home and prepare your heart. A peaceful heart leads to a peaceful atmosphere.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-burns/pause-before-you-get-home-and-prepare-your-heart-a-peaceful-heart/) [Jim Burns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-burns/) > [Histories never conclude; they just pause their prose. Their stories are, if they are truthful, untidy affairs, resistant to windings-up and sortings-out. They beat…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simon-schama/histories-never-conclude-they-just-pause-their-prose-their-stories/) [Simon Schama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simon-schama/) ## More by Alan Alda > [On the stage, the characters express themselves more through words than images. So the arguments of the characters and the tension between characters -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/on-the-stage-the-characters-express-themselves-more-through-words/) [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) > [We need to be more conversant with it because science is in our lives. It's in everything. It's in the food we eat. It's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/we-need-to-be-more-conversant-with-it-because-science-is-in-our-lives/) [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) > [When I studied how to think in school, I was taught that the first rule of logic was that a thing cannot both be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/when-i-studied-how-to-think-in-school-i-was-taught-that-the-first/) [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) > [I was brought up as a Catholic, and I'm no longer a Catholic. I don't talk about my beliefs too much in public probably…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/i-was-brought-up-as-a-catholic-and-i-m-no-longer-a-catholic-i-don-t/) [Alan Alda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/) > [life is meaningless unless you bring meaning to it; ... it is up to us to create our own existence. 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Choose good ones.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wayne-dyer/it-s-only-a-thought-and-a-thought-can-be-changed-choose-good-ones/) [Wayne Dyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wayne-dyer/) > [Working with Rihanna has changed my life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bibi-bourelly/working-with-rihanna-has-changed-my-life/) [Bibi Bourelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bibi-bourelly/) > [The international game has changed for bidding cities.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-ueberroth/the-international-game-has-changed-for-bidding-cities/) [Peter Ueberroth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-ueberroth/) > [You changed my life, don't know what you're doing to me with your love. You got me feeling super human.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-changed-my-life-don-t-know-what-you-re-doing-to-me-with-your-love/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I'm not changing because I'm part of a hit. 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We simply hire nice…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-rohn/good-people-are-found-not-changed-recently-i-read-a-headline-that/) [Jim Rohn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-rohn/) Browse all 6,529 Changed quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take place… [You have to be] willing to be changed by the person you're listening to, where you're not just waiting for a pause so you can say your thing, but you're actually letting them have an effect on you if they can.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Alan Alda" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connection-won-t-take-place-you-have/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Changed" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connection-won-t-take-place-you-have/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d9/alan-alda-1859_changed_if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connectio_2177513.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you don't listen deeply, the connection won't take place… [You have to be] willing to be changed by the…” — Alan Alda", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Alan Alda", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-alda/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "If you don't listen deeply, the...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connection-won-t-take-place-you-have/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-alda/if-you-don-t-listen-deeply-the-connection-won-t-take-place-you-have/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```