--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Though loss did not pass from one person…" description: "\"“Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker a baton; it just formed a bigger and bigger pool of carriers. And, she thought, scratching t..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png" --- # Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker… ![“Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker a baton; it just formed a bigger and bigger pool of carriers. And, she thought, scratching the coarseness of the horse's mane, it did not leave once lodged, did it, simply changed form and asked repeatedly for attention and care, as each…” quote by Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png) > ““Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker a baton; it just formed a bigger and bigger pool of carriers. And, she thought, scratching the coarseness of the horse's mane, it did not leave once lodged, did it, simply changed form and asked repeatedly for attention and care, as each year revealed a new knot to cry out and consider - smaller, sure, but never gone.”” [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Grief spreads, accumulating in people, changing form but never disappearing, demanding ongoing care. **In simple terms:** Loss builds up and stays, needing attention. Key Takeaway Acknowledge and support ongoing grief. Themes grief memory transformation Mood somber empathetic Type narrative reflective When to use this quote - family loss - long‑term mourning - mental health - support groups Key Concepts psychology human experience Questions to Reflect On - What ways can we help others carry grief? - How does shared mourning change relationships? A Different Perspective Grief may eventually fade for some. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Losing a loved one](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/losing-a-loved-one/) [Loss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loss/) ## Related quotes > [For so long, I felt like a walking open wound everywhere I went. There's this Joan Didion quote about being afflicted from an early…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-williams/for-so-long-i-felt-like-a-walking-open-wound-everywhere-i-went-there/) [Michelle Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-williams/) > [Was there a language of loss? Did everyone who suffered speak a different dialect?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/was-there-a-language-of-loss-did-everyone-who-suffered-speak-a/) [Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/) > [Those who learned to know death, rather than to fear and fight it, become our teachers about life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elisabeth-kubler-ross/those-who-learned-to-know-death-rather-than-to-fear-and-fight-it/) [Elisabeth Kubler-Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elisabeth-kubler-ross/) > [“By acknowledging my impermanence, I can consider if there is anything I can do now to help my loved ones who will be left…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-j-shultz/by-acknowledging-my-impermanence-i-can-consider-if-there-is-anything/) [Lisa J. Shultz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-j-shultz/) > [The importance of heart health became very real for me when my father died of heart disease seven years ago. Having experienced the loss…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/monica-potter/the-importance-of-heart-health-became-very-real-for-me-when-my-father/) [Monica Potter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/monica-potter/) > [You never know what you have till you've lost it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alyson-noel/you-never-know-what-you-have-till-you-ve-lost-it/) [Alyson Noel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alyson-noel/) > [Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/have-you-ever-lost-someone-you-love-and-wanted-one-more-conversation/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [The experience of losing a loved one impels us toward a deeper understanding of life. Everyone fears and is saddened by death. That is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daisaku-ikeda/the-experience-of-losing-a-loved-one-impels-us-toward-a-deeper/) [Daisaku Ikeda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daisaku-ikeda/) > [He spoke well who said that graves are the footprints of angels.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-wadsworth-longfellow/he-spoke-well-who-said-that-graves-are-the-footprints-of-angels/) [Henry Wadsworth Longfellow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-wadsworth-longfellow/) > [I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-buscaglia/i-know-for-certain-that-we-never-lose-the-people-we-love-even-to/) [Leo Buscaglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-buscaglia/) > [Through tears and trials, through fears and sorrows, through the heartache and loneliness of losing loved ones, there is assurance that life is everlasting.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-s-monson/through-tears-and-trials-through-fears-and-sorrows-through-the/) [Thomas S. Monson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-s-monson/) > [You have to start over. That's what they say. But life is not a board game, and losing a loved one is never really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/you-have-to-start-over-that-s-what-they-say-but-life-is-not-a-board/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [Man, when he does not grieve, hardly exists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antonio-porchia/man-when-he-does-not-grieve-hardly-exists/) [Antonio Porchia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antonio-porchia/) > [I learned that victims come in all image - some raped, some witnessing an act of violence, some losing loved ones. I learned that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zainab-salbi/i-learned-that-victims-come-in-all-image-some-raped-some-witnessing/) [Zainab Salbi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zainab-salbi/) > [So sad! This is the saddest part when you lose someone you love- that person keeps changing. And later you wonder, Is this the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-tan/so-sad-this-is-the-saddest-part-when-you-lose-someone-you-love-that/) [Amy Tan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-tan/) ## More by Aimee Bender > [“Does it work with sandwiches? he asked. I didn't move. He handed it over. George was watching with a kind of neutral curiosity, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/does-it-work-with-sandwiches-he-asked-i-didn-t-move-he-handed-it-over/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [There's a spectrum of those moments of connection and the moments we fail to connect, going from super-large successes to failures. Success would be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/there-s-a-spectrum-of-those-moments-of-connection-and-the-moments-we/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [I did plays in college, and I have half of a play. But I'm kind of stuck. I keep revisiting it so maybe it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/i-did-plays-in-college-and-i-have-half-of-a-play-but-i-m-kind-of/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“My genes, my love, are rubber bands and rope - make yourself a structure you can live inside.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/my-genes-my-love-are-rubber-bands-and-rope-make-yourself-a-structure/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [One thing I don't want to feel is marketplace pressure, so I'm really glad I enjoy teaching because I can rely on that for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/one-thing-i-don-t-want-to-feel-is-marketplace-pressure-so-i-m-really/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [Language is the ticket to plot and character, after all, because both are built out of language.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/language-is-the-ticket-to-plot-and-character-after-all-because-both/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [I give boring people something to discuss over corn.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/i-give-boring-people-something-to-discuss-over-corn/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“The sensor did not seem to be restricted to my mother's food, and there was so much to sort through, a torrent of information,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/the-sensor-did-not-seem-to-be-restricted-to-my-mother-s-food-and/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [I peeled the skin off a grape in slippery little triangles, and I understood then that I would be undressing every item of food…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/i-peeled-the-skin-off-a-grape-in-slippery-little-triangles-and-i/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [It was like we were exchanging codes, on how to be a father and a daughter, like we'd read about it in a manual,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/it-was-like-we-were-exchanging-codes-on-how-to-be-a-father-and-a/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“I started in our neighborhood, buying a pastrami burrito at Oki Dog and a deluxe gardenburger at Astro Burger and matzoh-ball soup at Greenblatt's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/i-started-in-our-neighborhood-buying-a-pastrami-burrito-at-oki-dog/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“I loved my dish towel. This one was two-toned, and had, on one side, stitchings of fat purple roses on a lavender background, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/i-loved-my-dish-towel-this-one-was-two-toned-and-had-on-one-side/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > […kissing George was a little like rolling in caramel after spending years surviving off rice sticks.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/kissing-george-was-a-little-like-rolling-in-caramel-after-spending/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“And in it all, the sensation of shaking my fists at the sky, shaking my fists high up to the sky, because that is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/and-in-it-all-the-sensation-of-shaking-my-fists-at-the-sky-shaking-my/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) > [“He made a good salary but he did not flaunt it. He’d been raised in Chicago proper by a Lithuanian Jewish mother who had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/he-made-a-good-salary-but-he-did-not-flaunt-it-he-d-been-raised-in/) [Aimee Bender](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) [Explore all 172 Aimee Bender quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/) ## More Losing a loved one quotes > [So sad! This is the saddest part when you lose someone you love- that person keeps changing. And later you wonder, Is this the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-tan/so-sad-this-is-the-saddest-part-when-you-lose-someone-you-love-that/) [Amy Tan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-tan/) > [I learned that victims come in all image - some raped, some witnessing an act of violence, some losing loved ones. I learned that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zainab-salbi/i-learned-that-victims-come-in-all-image-some-raped-some-witnessing/) [Zainab Salbi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zainab-salbi/) > [Man, when he does not grieve, hardly exists.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antonio-porchia/man-when-he-does-not-grieve-hardly-exists/) [Antonio Porchia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antonio-porchia/) > [You have to start over. That's what they say. But life is not a board game, and losing a loved one is never really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/you-have-to-start-over-that-s-what-they-say-but-life-is-not-a-board/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [Through tears and trials, through fears and sorrows, through the heartache and loneliness of losing loved ones, there is assurance that life is everlasting.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-s-monson/through-tears-and-trials-through-fears-and-sorrows-through-the/) [Thomas S. Monson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-s-monson/) > [I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-buscaglia/i-know-for-certain-that-we-never-lose-the-people-we-love-even-to/) [Leo Buscaglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-buscaglia/) > [He spoke well who said that graves are the footprints of angels.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-wadsworth-longfellow/he-spoke-well-who-said-that-graves-are-the-footprints-of-angels/) [Henry Wadsworth Longfellow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-wadsworth-longfellow/) > [The experience of losing a loved one impels us toward a deeper understanding of life. Everyone fears and is saddened by death. That is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daisaku-ikeda/the-experience-of-losing-a-loved-one-impels-us-toward-a-deeper/) [Daisaku Ikeda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daisaku-ikeda/) > [Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/have-you-ever-lost-someone-you-love-and-wanted-one-more-conversation/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [You never know what you have till you've lost it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alyson-noel/you-never-know-what-you-have-till-you-ve-lost-it/) [Alyson Noel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alyson-noel/) > [The importance of heart health became very real for me when my father died of heart disease seven years ago. Having experienced the loss…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/monica-potter/the-importance-of-heart-health-became-very-real-for-me-when-my-father/) [Monica Potter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/monica-potter/) > [“By acknowledging my impermanence, I can consider if there is anything I can do now to help my loved ones who will be left…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-j-shultz/by-acknowledging-my-impermanence-i-can-consider-if-there-is-anything/) [Lisa J. Shultz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-j-shultz/) > [Those who learned to know death, rather than to fear and fight it, become our teachers about life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elisabeth-kubler-ross/those-who-learned-to-know-death-rather-than-to-fear-and-fight-it/) [Elisabeth Kubler-Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elisabeth-kubler-ross/) > [When you awaken in the morning's hush I am the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-elizabeth-frye/when-you-awaken-in-the-morning-s-hush-i-am-the-swift-uplifting-rush/) [Mary Elizabeth Frye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-elizabeth-frye/) > [“It kind of scares me though, to keep wearing it every day like I do. What happens when I run out of it? Will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/keary-taylor/it-kind-of-scares-me-though-to-keep-wearing-it-every-day-like-i-do/) [Keary Taylor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/keary-taylor/) [Browse all 35 Losing a loved one quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/losing-a-loved-one/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker a baton; it just formed a bigger and bigger pool of carriers. And, she thought, scratching the coarseness of the horse's mane, it did not leave once lodged, did it, simply changed form and asked repeatedly for attention and care, as each year revealed a new knot to cry out and consider - smaller, sure, but never gone.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Aimee Bender" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person-to-another-liker-a-baton-it/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Losing a loved one" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person-to-another-liker-a-baton-it/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/047/aimee-bender-2250_losing-a-loved-one_though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person_1003731.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Though loss did not pass from one person to another liker a baton; it just formed a bigger and bigger pool…” — Aimee Bender", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Aimee Bender", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aimee-bender/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“Though loss did not pass from...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person-to-another-liker-a-baton-it/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aimee-bender/though-loss-did-not-pass-from-one-person-to-another-liker-a-baton-it/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```