--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Whereas selfless givers make the mistake…" description: "\"“Whereas selfless givers make the mistake of trusting others all the time, otherish givers start out with trust as the default assumption, but they’re ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/330/adam-m-grant-1427_failure_whereas-selfless-givers-make-the-mistake_2219514.jpg" --- # Whereas selfless givers make the mistake of trusting… ![“Whereas selfless givers make the mistake of trusting others all the time, otherish givers start out with trust as the default assumption, but they’re willing to adjust their reciprocity styles in exchanges with someone who appears to be a taker by action or reputation.” quote by Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/330/adam-m-grant-1427_failure_whereas-selfless-givers-make-the-mistake_2219514.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/330/adam-m-grant-1427_failure_whereas-selfless-givers-make-the-mistake_2219514.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/330/adam-m-grant-1427_failure_whereas-selfless-givers-make-the-mistake_2219514.jpg) > ““Whereas selfless givers make the mistake of trusting others all the time, otherish givers start out with trust as the default assumption, but they’re willing to adjust their reciprocity styles in exchanges with someone who appears to be a taker by action or reputation.”” [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Selfless givers trust others by default, but can adjust their reciprocity when faced with takers. **In simple terms:** Start with trust, but be ready to adapt. Key Takeaway Trust first, adjust if needed. Themes trust reciprocity social dynamics Mood analytical balanced Type psychological advisory When to use this quote - teamwork - negotiation - leadership - friendship Key Concepts relationship management behavioral economics Questions to Reflect On - When should you change your trust level? - How do you balance generosity with self-protection? A Different Perspective Over-adjusting may lead to exploitation if trust is withdrawn too quickly. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Adjust Reciprocity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/adjust-reciprocity-4948302/) [Failure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/failure/) [Otherish Givers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/otherish-givers-1915088/) [Reciprocity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reciprocity/) [Reciprocity Styles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reciprocity-styles-1838735/) [Sacrifice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sacrifice/) [Selfless Givers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/selfless-givers-1915087/) [Trust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trust/) [Trusting others](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trusting-others/) ## Related quotes > [“Otherish givers may appear less altruistic than selfless givers, but their resilience against burnout enables them to contribute more.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/otherish-givers-may-appear-less-altruistic-than-selfless-givers-but/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“The most effective negotiators were otherish: they reported high concern for their own interests and high concern for their counterparts’ interests. By looking for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/the-most-effective-negotiators-were-otherish-they-reported-high/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“Reciprocity styles offer a powerful lens for explaining why some people flourish in teams while others fail. In Multipliers, former Oracle executive Liz Wiseman…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/reciprocity-styles-offer-a-powerful-lens-for-explaining-why-some/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“If I asked you to guess who’s the most likely to end up at the bottom of the success ladder, what would you say—takers,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/if-i-asked-you-to-guess-who-s-the-most-likely-to-end-up-at-the-bottom/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“givers always score high on other-interest, but they vary in self-interest. There are two types of givers, and they have dramatically different success rates.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/givers-always-score-high-on-other-interest-but-they-vary-in-self/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“selfless givers are more inclined to sprinkle their giving throughout their days, helping whenever people need them. This can become highly distracting and exhausting,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/selfless-givers-are-more-inclined-to-sprinkle-their-giving-throughout/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“The Reciprocity Ring created a context that encouraged takers to act like givers, and the key lies in making giving public. Takers know that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/the-reciprocity-ring-created-a-context-that-encouraged-takers-to-act/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“Start the spark of reciprocity by making requests as well as helping others. Help generously and without thought of return; but also ask often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/start-the-spark-of-reciprocity-by-making-requests-as-well-as-helping/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“today, givers like Adam Rifkin are able to spark a more powerful form of reciprocity. Instead of trading value, Rifkin aims to add value.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/today-givers-like-adam-rifkin-are-able-to-spark-a-more-powerful-form/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“When people assume that others aren’t givers, they act and speak in ways that discourage others from giving, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. As a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/when-people-assume-that-others-aren-t-givers-they-act-and-speak-in/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“to the psychologist Robert Cialdini, people can capitalize on this norm of reciprocity by giving what they want to receive. Instead”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/to-the-psychologist-robert-cialdini-people-can-capitalize-on-this/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“It takes a lot of heart to build trust, even more to keep the trust.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abhijit-naskar/it-takes-a-lot-of-heart-to-build-trust-even-more-to-keep-the-trust/) [Abhijit Naskar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abhijit-naskar/) > [The devil himself is a sweet talker.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-devil-himself-is-a-sweet-talker/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [You never lose much by trusting others completely. TRUST ME. If they betray or deceive you, the loss is all theirs. You know why,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anas/you-never-lose-much-by-trusting-others-completely-trust-me-if-they/) [Anas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anas/) > [“If we can't trust ourselves, we'll have a hard time trusting others.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-m-r-covey/if-we-can-t-trust-ourselves-we-ll-have-a-hard-time-trusting-others/) [Stephen M.R. Covey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-m-r-covey/) ## More by Adam M. Grant > [“the higher the psychological safety in a unit, the fewer errors they made. Why? In the units that lacked psychological safety, health care professionals…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/the-higher-the-psychological-safety-in-a-unit-the-fewer-errors-they/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“And in the long run, research shows that the mistakes we regret are not errors of commission, but errors of omission. If we could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/and-in-the-long-run-research-shows-that-the-mistakes-we-regret-are/) [Adam M. 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Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) > [“A new scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents and making them see the light, but rather because its opponents eventually die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-m-grant/a-new-scientific-truth-does-not-triumph-by-convincing-its-opponents/) [Adam M. Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) [Explore all 241 Adam M. Grant quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-m-grant/) ## More Failure quotes > [When you do things they're absolutely right at that time for you and it can always teach you something about yourself. You can take…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kym-marsh/when-you-do-things-they-re-absolutely-right-at-that-time-for-you-and/) [Kym Marsh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kym-marsh/) > [Failures happen. You can't cry over them. You just take it in your stride because you know that you have done your best... 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Failure is something that is part of life's cycle…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-powell/failure-is-a-part-of-life-and-you-have-to-learn-to-deal-with-it/) [Colin Powell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-powell/) > [If my child had prejudice in his head, I'd be ashamed. I would see it as my failure as a parent.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/salman-rushdie/if-my-child-had-prejudice-in-his-head-i-d-be-ashamed-i-would-see-it/) [Salman Rushdie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/salman-rushdie/) > [First action was a mistake. 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