--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: There's people who think what they need…" description: "\"There's people who think what they need and what they deserve in their lives is a lot worse than what they actually do, so they get themselves involved..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png" --- # There's people who think what they need and what they… ![“There's people who think what they need and what they deserve in their lives is a lot worse than what they actually do, so they get themselves involved in things that are needlessly painful: brutal relationships, abusive relationships.” quote by Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png) > “There's people who think what they need and what they deserve in their lives is a lot worse than what they actually do, so they get themselves involved in things that are needlessly painful: brutal relationships, abusive relationships.” [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. People overestimate their needs and deserve, leading them into painful, abusive relationships. **In simple terms:** Misplaced expectations cause harmful relationships. Key Takeaway Cultivate realistic self‑expectations and healthy boundaries. Themes self‑esteem relationships psychology Mood introspective cautionary Type psychological advice When to use this quote - dating - family dynamics - therapy sessions Key Concepts expectations abuse self‑worth Questions to Reflect On - What expectations drive your relationship choices? - How can you set healthier boundaries? A Different Perspective Self‑awareness is required to change patterns. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abusive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive/) [Abusive relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-relationship/) [Abusive Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-relationships-2/) [Brutal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brutal/) [Brutal Relationships](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brutal-relationships-5004673/) [Deserve](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/deserve/) [Deserve Lives](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/deserve-lives-579455/) [Involved](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/involved/) [Life is](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-is/) [Needs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/needs/) [Painful](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/painful/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Relationships Abusive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationships-abusive-3490408/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) ## Related quotes > [“One of the obstacles to recognizing chronic mistreatment in relationships is that most abusive men simply don’t seem like abusers. 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It's also the No.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kerry-washington/the-no-1-reason-women-stay-in-abusive-relationships-because-they-re/) [Kerry Washington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kerry-washington/) > [“Abusive relationships exist because they provide enough rations of warmth, laughter, and affection to clutch onto like a security blanket in the heap of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maggie-young/abusive-relationships-exist-because-they-provide-enough-rations-of/) [Maggie Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maggie-young/) > [Well, I went through some emotionally abusive relationships and allowed myself to not be properly respected as a lady, as a human being even,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-gaynor/well-i-went-through-some-emotionally-abusive-relationships-and/) [Gloria Gaynor](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-gaynor/) > [I met a lot of amazing people whose lives were changed (for the better) by the power of music. Music gave them strength to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lita-ford/i-met-a-lot-of-amazing-people-whose-lives-were-changed-for-the-better/) [Lita Ford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lita-ford/) > [The reason I gained so much weight in the first place and the reason I had such a sorry history of abusive relationships with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oprah-winfrey/the-reason-i-gained-so-much-weight-in-the-first-place-and-the-reason/) [Oprah Winfrey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oprah-winfrey/) > [There's so much going on, with child abuse, not having the right relationships and being in abusive relationships, that play into her, and that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tinsel-korey/there-s-so-much-going-on-with-child-abuse-not-having-the-right/) [Tinsel Korey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tinsel-korey/) > [Abusive relationships are like being addicted a bad drug. 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But I saw how so much of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eve-ensler/i-was-a-young-feminist-in-the-70s-feminism-saved-my-life-it-gave-me-a/) [Eve Ensler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eve-ensler/) > [Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mercy-pheona/scared-of-being-alone-is-what-makes-a-lot-of-women-stay-in/) [Mercy Pheona](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mercy-pheona/) > [“The woman who left abusive husbands in the 60's and 70's improved the institution of marriage because men now know that women can leave…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stefan-molyneux/the-woman-who-left-abusive-husbands-in-the-60-s-and-70-s-improved-the/) [Stefan Molyneux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stefan-molyneux/) > [“Law firms can create environments for abusive relationships. This is especially true if an attorney has no self-direction, has no independent means of financial…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-d-hart/law-firms-can-create-environments-for-abusive-relationships-this-is/) [Robin D. Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-d-hart/) > [“All abusive relationships teach a form of love. JOHN BRADSHAW”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anodea-judith/all-abusive-relationships-teach-a-form-of-love-john-bradshaw/) [Anodea Judith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anodea-judith/) ## More by Adam Duritz > [You want to embrace, but I can't figure out how to hold on to it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/you-want-to-embrace-but-i-can-t-figure-out-how-to-hold-on-to-it/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [There just is exponentially more money in the movie business than in the music business. As a result there are more people involved in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/there-just-is-exponentially-more-money-in-the-movie-business-than-in/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [I find that truly heartbreaking that, like, it's such a common, constant thing in people's lives - a brutal abuse of people by other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/i-find-that-truly-heartbreaking-that-like-it-s-such-a-common-constant/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [If dreams are like movies, then memories are films about ghosts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/if-dreams-are-like-movies-then-memories-are-films-about-ghosts/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [If you've never stared off in the distance, then your life is a shame.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/if-you-ve-never-stared-off-in-the-distance-then-your-life-is-a-shame/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [I've been playing music most of my life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/i-ve-been-playing-music-most-of-my-life/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [For all the things I'm losing I might aswell resign myself to try and make a change.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/for-all-the-things-i-m-losing-i-might-aswell-resign-myself-to-try-and/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [Being in a band is about making the band the priority.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/being-in-a-band-is-about-making-the-band-the-priority/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [You have to kind of shift the way you look at life when you're in a group of people that you work with. It's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/you-have-to-kind-of-shift-the-way-you-look-at-life-when-you-re-in-a/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [When so much money is involved in these movies, someone somewhere is going to try to screw you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/when-so-much-money-is-involved-in-these-movies-someone-somewhere-is/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [That's where the songs come from: that's what I'd most want people to understand. What sounds good or looks good, that's nothing. The only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/that-s-where-the-songs-come-from-that-s-what-i-d-most-want-people-to/) [Adam Duritz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/) > [When you're young and you play music, you have a peer group, you come out of a scene. 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It's institutions that keep us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-frum/one-of-the-things-we-re-all-going-to-have-to-discover-establishment/) [David Frum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-frum/) > [“KINGDOM OF THE WOMB From her thighs, she gives you life And how you treat she who gives you life Shows how much you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzy-kassem/kingdom-of-the-womb-from-her-thighs-she-gives-you-life-and-how-you/) [Suzy Kassem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzy-kassem/) > [An abusive relationship? A cheating Ex Partner? Family who constantly disrespect you? Those are just a few examples of bridges that should rightly be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/an-abusive-relationship-a-cheating-ex-partner-family-who-constantly/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I have a temper, but I wouldn't call me abusive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tatum-o-neal/i-have-a-temper-but-i-wouldn-t-call-me-abusive/) [Tatum O'Neal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tatum-o-neal/) > [I wouldn't mind being in an abusive relationship with you babes only if you would punch me with her tits.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikhil-saluja/i-wouldn-t-mind-being-in-an-abusive-relationship-with-you-babes-only/) [Nikhil Saluja](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikhil-saluja/) > [“The woman knows from living with the abusive man that there are no simple answers. Friends say: “He’s mean.” But she knows many ways…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lundy-bancroft/the-woman-knows-from-living-with-the-abusive-man-that-there-are-no/) [Lundy Bancroft](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lundy-bancroft/) > [I am asking my Attorney General to create a special unit of federal prosecutors and leading state attorneys general to expand our investigations into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barack-obama/i-am-asking-my-attorney-general-to-create-a-special-unit-of-federal/) [Barack Obama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barack-obama/) > [Intolerance has always been one of the cornerstones of Christianity - the glorious heritage of the Inquisition. 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"It doesn't have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/just-start-somewhere-dr-marshall-had-said-to-me-as-i-ground-a-banana/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) [Browse all 311 Abusive quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "There's people who think what they need and what they deserve in their lives is a lot worse than what they actually do, so they get themselves involved in things that are needlessly painful: brutal relationships, abusive relationships.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Duritz" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need-and-what-they-deserve-in/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Abusive" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need-and-what-they-deserve-in/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13b/adam-duritz-12230_abusive_there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need_3039821.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There's people who think what they need and what they deserve in their lives is a lot worse than what they…” — Adam Duritz", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Adam Duritz", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-duritz/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "There's people who think what they...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need-and-what-they-deserve-in/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-duritz/there-s-people-who-think-what-they-need-and-what-they-deserve-in/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```