---
title: "13 Your Quotes By J. B. Smoove"
description: "13 Your quotes by J. B. Smoove. Plus more from J. B. Smoove and more Your sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa9/j-b-smoove-3940_about_being-a-parent-is-about-your-survival-su_794311.jpg"
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> [Being a parent is about your survival. Surviving the terrible two's is the most important thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/being-a-parent-is-about-your-survival-surviving-the-terrible-two-s-is/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa9/j-b-smoove-3940_about_being-a-parent-is-about-your-survival-su_794311.jpg)

> [Police blog or entertainment news, it's just good to see your name in print.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/police-blog-or-entertainment-news-it-s-just-good-to-see-your-name-in/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d8/j-b-smoove-3940_blog_police-blog-or-entertainment-news-it-s-j_807176.jpg)

> [You got to start by doing little things if your quest is to take over the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-got-to-start-by-doing-little-things-if-your-quest-is-to-take-over/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b8e/j-b-smoove-3940_adventure_you-got-to-start-by-doing-little-things_1207767.jpg)

> [You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist-what-man-wouldn-t-want-a/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/379/j-b-smoove-3940_lady_you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist_633138.jpg)

> [What happens in improv is you create your own storyline.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-your-own-storyline/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fb/j-b-smoove-3940_create_what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-you_2650512.jpg)

> [If your boss asks you why you're comin' in late, you say it's 'cause you stayed late.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-in-late-you-say-it-s-cause-you/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6af/j-b-smoove-3940_asks_if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-i_851492.jpg)

> [I wouldn't want to be someone's roommate, that's for sure. You can't do certain things: you can't leave the bathroom door open...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate-that-s-for-sure-you-can-t-do/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c45/j-b-smoove-3940_bathroom_i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate_1483788.jpg)

> [If a director brings a guy to their movie who does improv, they've got to let him do what he does -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-a-director-brings-a-guy-to-their-movie-who-does-improv-they-ve-got/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/736/j-b-smoove-3940_ball_if-a-director-brings-a-guy-to-their-movi_108812.jpg)

> ['The ruckus' is different experiences you go through throughout your life which builds your ruckus points up - your tolerance. You've got…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you-go-through-throughout-your/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/721/j-b-smoove-3940_builds_the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you_2072883.jpg)

> [To be a true comic, you have to have a signature move. You ever watch wrestling? And your favorite wrestler has the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-signature-move-you-ever-watch/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/197/j-b-smoove-3940_always_to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-si_1379391.jpg)

> [I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-going-through-my-process-of-being/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a97/j-b-smoove-3940_actor_i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-goin_2862504.jpg)

> [I'm sure back in the Greek days or the Roman Empire days, when guys fought in arenas and were fighting lions, people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-roman-empire-days-when-guys/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/435/j-b-smoove-3940_arena_i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-r_2498770.jpg)

> [I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and-what-i-do-in-my-standup/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a0/j-b-smoove-3940_across_i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and_733575.jpg)

## Other authors on Your

## More by J. B. Smoove

> [You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so amazing to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuff-i-like-the-andy-griffith/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [You have to fail, man, but you cannot allow failure to stop you from doing what you must do. Failing is just as good…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-have-to-fail-man-but-you-cannot-allow-failure-to-stop-you-from/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [If a director brings a guy to their movie who does improv, they've got to let him do what he does - otherwise it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-a-director-brings-a-guy-to-their-movie-who-does-improv-they-ve-got/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [A lot of comedians are selfish.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/a-lot-of-comedians-are-selfish/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening-as-it-does-you-delivering/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [My life is gardening, cleaning around the house and power washing. I power wash everything: my wife, the mailman with the f-cking mail, power…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/my-life-is-gardening-cleaning-around-the-house-and-power-washing-i/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I believe, even when I'm doing my standup or my acting or whatever I'm doing, I believe in painting pictures.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-believe-even-when-i-m-doing-my-standup-or-my-acting-or-whatever-i-m/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I should be European, man. I'm long and lean. I'd look good in a trench coat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-should-be-european-man-i-m-long-and-lean-i-d-look-good-in-a-trench/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [Man, you can come see me six or seven times in a row and you'll never see the same show twice, because I don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/man-you-can-come-see-me-six-or-seven-times-in-a-row-and-you-ll-never/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I've done everything. Selling door-to-door fire extinguishers... In bars, I used to repair those machines that have 10 different buttons on them to spray…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-ve-done-everything-selling-door-to-door-fire-extinguishers-in-bars/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I'm nice with damn kids, man. Kids love me. I can bounce back and forth. I can discipline kids and I can get into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-nice-with-damn-kids-man-kids-love-me-i-can-bounce-back-and-forth/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist-what-man-wouldn-t-want-a/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [It's great when a director like Cameron Crowe can take what you do and fit it into what he's doing. If someone's a fan…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron-crowe-can-take-what-you-do/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I live in New York right now but I'm originally from my daddy's nuts. We all are. Think about, we the lucky ones -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-live-in-new-york-right-now-but-i-m-originally-from-my-daddy-s-nuts/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

> [I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand that I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and-what-i-do-in-my-standup/)

[J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/)

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                        "text": "To be a true comic, you have to have a signature move. You ever watch wrestling? And your favorite wrestler has the one move that he always does to finish his opponent off, right? Like when he climbs on the rope, and he always jumps off the top rope and finishes off his opponent - that's what a comic has.",
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                        "text": "I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and a writer at 'SNL,' I tell people that everything you do is all a piece of your puzzle to determine where you're going to end up at.",
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                        "text": "I'm sure back in the Greek days or the Roman Empire days, when guys fought in arenas and were fighting lions, people were talking smack. Every era in history has someone talking smack. No way you can have talent and not proclaim your victory.",
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