--- title: "28 You Quotes By J. B. Smoove" description: "28 You quotes by J. B. Smoove. Plus more from J. B. Smoove and more You sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0c/j-b-smoove-3940_babysitting_when-you-re-babysitting-a-kid-all-you-re_1655729.jpg" --- > [When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/when-you-re-babysitting-a-kid-all-you-re-seeing-is-a-version-of-them/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0c/j-b-smoove-3940_babysitting_when-you-re-babysitting-a-kid-all-you-re_1655729.jpg) > [You got to start by doing little things if your quest is to take over the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-got-to-start-by-doing-little-things-if-your-quest-is-to-take-over/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b8e/j-b-smoove-3940_adventure_you-got-to-start-by-doing-little-things_1207767.jpg) > [You turn hotdogs with tongs. Don't you ever use those tongs on a hamburger.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-turn-hotdogs-with-tongs-don-t-you-ever-use-those-tongs-on-a/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/37a/j-b-smoove-3940_ever_you-turn-hotdogs-with-tongs-don-t-you-ev_2242096.jpg) > [You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist-what-man-wouldn-t-want-a/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/379/j-b-smoove-3940_lady_you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist_633138.jpg) > [You gotta improvise in life. You gotta improv if the police pull you over.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-improv-if-the-police-pull-you/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49c/j-b-smoove-3940_gotta_you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-im_1521110.jpg) > [I just always found it easier to be the same guy onstage as you are offstage.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the-same-guy-onstage-as-you-are/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/j-b-smoove-3940_always_i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the_855357.jpg) > [What happens in improv is you create your own storyline.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-your-own-storyline/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fb/j-b-smoove-3940_create_what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-you_2650512.jpg) > [All you wanna do in life is do what you do well. That's when you're happiest.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/all-you-wanna-do-in-life-is-do-what-you-do-well-that-s-when-you-re/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/92c/j-b-smoove-3940_happiest_all-you-wanna-do-in-life-is-do-what-you_1391612.jpg) > [You buy a new iPhone, a few months later, another new iPhone comes out, and you get online to buy another one.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later-another-new-iphone-comes-out/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/198/j-b-smoove-3940_addicted_you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later_1577799.jpg) > [Live TV has an amazing pace to it. You've got to be able to think quick, make changes last minute, and be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve-got-to-be-able-to-think/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/16f/j-b-smoove-3940_able_live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve_834165.jpg) > [I'm on my version of the protein diet, but there ain't no protein in it. It's a Krispy Kreme doughnut between two…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-on-my-version-of-the-protein-diet-but-there-ain-t-no-protein-in/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/352/j-b-smoove-3940_between_i-m-on-my-version-of-the-protein-diet-bu_3024244.jpg) > [I wouldn't want to be someone's roommate, that's for sure. You can't do certain things: you can't leave the bathroom door open...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate-that-s-for-sure-you-can-t-do/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c45/j-b-smoove-3940_bathroom_i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate_1483788.jpg) > [You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuff-i-like-the-andy-griffith/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c78/j-b-smoove-3940_amazing_you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuf_86454.jpg) > [You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing people overlook.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-with-a-whole-hamper-full-of/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/192/j-b-smoove-3940_bath_you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-wi_2478004.jpg) > ['The ruckus' is different experiences you go through throughout your life which builds your ruckus points up - your tolerance. You've got…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you-go-through-throughout-your/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/721/j-b-smoove-3940_builds_the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you_2072883.jpg) > [Mel Gibson is losing it. I don't know how people still supporting this dude's movies like it's all good. That dude is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how-people-still-supporting-this/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/563/j-b-smoove-3940_any_mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how_3198692.jpg) > [To be a true comic, you have to have a signature move. You ever watch wrestling? And your favorite wrestler has the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-signature-move-you-ever-watch/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/197/j-b-smoove-3940_always_to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-si_1379391.jpg) > [It's great when a director like Cameron Crowe can take what you do and fit it into what he's doing. If someone's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron-crowe-can-take-what-you-do/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/843/j-b-smoove-3940_cameron_it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron_666224.jpg) > [I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-going-through-my-process-of-being/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a97/j-b-smoove-3940_actor_i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-goin_2862504.jpg) > [I'm sure back in the Greek days or the Roman Empire days, when guys fought in arenas and were fighting lions, people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-roman-empire-days-when-guys/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/435/j-b-smoove-3940_arena_i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-r_2498770.jpg) > [When you speak directly at things and don't say you're going to try to do something or that you hope to do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-don-t-say-you-re-going-to-try/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cc/j-b-smoove-3940_about_when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-do_2883476.jpg) > [Sometimes you can make friends, and sometimes you can take friends. Sometimes people want to be friends with you, and you gotta…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-sometimes-you-can-take-friends/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb3/j-b-smoove-3940_am_sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-somet_2751004.jpg) > [Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening-as-it-does-you-delivering/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/72e/j-b-smoove-3940_communication_improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening_262148.jpg) > [I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and-what-i-do-in-my-standup/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a0/j-b-smoove-3940_across_i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and_733575.jpg) > [If your boss asks you why you're comin' in late, you say it's 'cause you stayed late.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-in-late-you-say-it-s-cause-you/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6af/j-b-smoove-3940_asks_if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-i_851492.jpg) > [You know how you put peanut butter on a piece of bread and the bread falls - it never falls on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a-piece-of-bread-and-the-bread/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e5/j-b-smoove-3940_always_you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a_2372006.jpg) > [I'm street smart. You can't con me. But that's just from living in New York. Now if a guy came from Mississippi…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-that-s-just-from-living-in-new/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/139/j-b-smoove-3940_came_i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-th_2613903.jpg) > [I've had jokes stolen a thousand times. But if you can do it better than me, you can have it. I've had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-but-if-you-can-do-it-better/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/j-b-smoove-3940_better_i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-b_3196623.jpg) ## Other authors on You ## More by J. B. Smoove > [You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so amazing to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuff-i-like-the-andy-griffith/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [You have to fail, man, but you cannot allow failure to stop you from doing what you must do. Failing is just as good…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-have-to-fail-man-but-you-cannot-allow-failure-to-stop-you-from/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [If a director brings a guy to their movie who does improv, they've got to let him do what he does - otherwise it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-a-director-brings-a-guy-to-their-movie-who-does-improv-they-ve-got/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [A lot of comedians are selfish.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/a-lot-of-comedians-are-selfish/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening-as-it-does-you-delivering/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [My life is gardening, cleaning around the house and power washing. I power wash everything: my wife, the mailman with the f-cking mail, power…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/my-life-is-gardening-cleaning-around-the-house-and-power-washing-i/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I believe, even when I'm doing my standup or my acting or whatever I'm doing, I believe in painting pictures.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-believe-even-when-i-m-doing-my-standup-or-my-acting-or-whatever-i-m/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I should be European, man. I'm long and lean. I'd look good in a trench coat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-should-be-european-man-i-m-long-and-lean-i-d-look-good-in-a-trench/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [Man, you can come see me six or seven times in a row and you'll never see the same show twice, because I don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/man-you-can-come-see-me-six-or-seven-times-in-a-row-and-you-ll-never/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I've done everything. Selling door-to-door fire extinguishers... In bars, I used to repair those machines that have 10 different buttons on them to spray…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-ve-done-everything-selling-door-to-door-fire-extinguishers-in-bars/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I'm nice with damn kids, man. Kids love me. I can bounce back and forth. I can discipline kids and I can get into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-nice-with-damn-kids-man-kids-love-me-i-can-bounce-back-and-forth/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist-what-man-wouldn-t-want-a/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [It's great when a director like Cameron Crowe can take what you do and fit it into what he's doing. If someone's a fan…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron-crowe-can-take-what-you-do/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I live in New York right now but I'm originally from my daddy's nuts. We all are. Think about, we the lucky ones -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-live-in-new-york-right-now-but-i-m-originally-from-my-daddy-s-nuts/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) > [I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand that I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and-what-i-do-in-my-standup/) [J. B. Smoove](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-b-smoove/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/you/j-b-smoove/#itemlist", "name": "28 You Quotes By J. B. Smoove", "numberOfItems": 28, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. 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Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist-what-man-wouldn-t-want-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/379/j-b-smoove-3940_lady_you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist_633138.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/379/j-b-smoove-3940_lady_you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist_633138.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/379/j-b-smoove-3940_lady_you-want-your-lady-to-be-a-contortionist_633138.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You gotta improvise in life. You gotta improv if the police pull you over.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-improv-if-the-police-pull-you/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49c/j-b-smoove-3940_gotta_you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-im_1521110.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49c/j-b-smoove-3940_gotta_you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-im_1521110.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49c/j-b-smoove-3940_gotta_you-gotta-improvise-in-life-you-gotta-im_1521110.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You gotta improvise in life. You gotta improv if the police pull you over.” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 6, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I just always found it easier to be the same guy onstage as you are offstage.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the-same-guy-onstage-as-you-are/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/j-b-smoove-3940_always_i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the_855357.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/j-b-smoove-3940_always_i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the_855357.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/j-b-smoove-3940_always_i-just-always-found-it-easier-to-be-the_855357.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I just always found it easier to be the same guy onstage as you are offstage.” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "What happens in improv is you create your own storyline.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-your-own-storyline/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fb/j-b-smoove-3940_create_what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-you_2650512.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fb/j-b-smoove-3940_create_what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-you_2650512.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fb/j-b-smoove-3940_create_what-happens-in-improv-is-you-create-you_2650512.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“What happens in improv is you create your own storyline.” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "All you wanna do in life is do what you do well. That's when you're happiest.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. 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You are addicted to Apple.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later-another-new-iphone-comes-out/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/198/j-b-smoove-3940_addicted_you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later_1577799.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/198/j-b-smoove-3940_addicted_you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later_1577799.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/198/j-b-smoove-3940_addicted_you-buy-a-new-iphone-a-few-months-later_1577799.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You buy a new iPhone, a few months later, another new iPhone comes out, and you get online to buy another…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Live TV has an amazing pace to it. You've got to be able to think quick, make changes last minute, and be funny and fast.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve-got-to-be-able-to-think/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/16f/j-b-smoove-3940_able_live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve_834165.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/16f/j-b-smoove-3940_able_live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve_834165.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/16f/j-b-smoove-3940_able_live-tv-has-an-amazing-pace-to-it-you-ve_834165.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Live TV has an amazing pace to it. You've got to be able to think quick, make changes last minute, and be…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm on my version of the protein diet, but there ain't no protein in it. It's a Krispy Kreme doughnut between two Cinnabons. And you soak it overnight in Red Bull. Then you chase it with a Snickers.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. 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You can't do certain things: you can't leave the bathroom door open... you can't put your feet on the couch, you can't hide stuff in the couch.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate-that-s-for-sure-you-can-t-do/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c45/j-b-smoove-3940_bathroom_i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate_1483788.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c45/j-b-smoove-3940_bathroom_i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate_1483788.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c45/j-b-smoove-3940_bathroom_i-wouldn-t-want-to-be-someone-s-roommate_1483788.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I wouldn't want to be someone's roommate, that's for sure. You can't do certain things: you can't leave the…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so amazing to me.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuff-i-like-the-andy-griffith/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c78/j-b-smoove-3940_amazing_you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuf_86454.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c78/j-b-smoove-3940_amazing_you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuf_86454.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c78/j-b-smoove-3940_amazing_you-know-what-i-like-i-like-classic-stuf_86454.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing people overlook. And take a shower, take a bath every day.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-with-a-whole-hamper-full-of/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/192/j-b-smoove-3940_bath_you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-wi_2478004.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/192/j-b-smoove-3940_bath_you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-wi_2478004.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/192/j-b-smoove-3940_bath_you-don-t-want-to-take-the-world-over-wi_2478004.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "'The ruckus' is different experiences you go through throughout your life which builds your ruckus points up - your tolerance. You've got to have a high tolerance for dealing with stuff all the time.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you-go-through-throughout-your/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/721/j-b-smoove-3940_builds_the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you_2072883.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/721/j-b-smoove-3940_builds_the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you_2072883.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/721/j-b-smoove-3940_builds_the-ruckus-is-different-experiences-you_2072883.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“'The ruckus' is different experiences you go through throughout your life which builds your ruckus points up…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Mel Gibson is losing it. I don't know how people still supporting this dude's movies like it's all good. That dude is nuts. All you gotta do is shut him down and don't support any of his movies.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how-people-still-supporting-this/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/563/j-b-smoove-3940_any_mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how_3198692.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/563/j-b-smoove-3940_any_mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how_3198692.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/563/j-b-smoove-3940_any_mel-gibson-is-losing-it-i-don-t-know-how_3198692.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Mel Gibson is losing it. I don't know how people still supporting this dude's movies like it's all good…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "To be a true comic, you have to have a signature move. You ever watch wrestling? And your favorite wrestler has the one move that he always does to finish his opponent off, right? Like when he climbs on the rope, and he always jumps off the top rope and finishes off his opponent - that's what a comic has.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-signature-move-you-ever-watch/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/197/j-b-smoove-3940_always_to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-si_1379391.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/197/j-b-smoove-3940_always_to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-si_1379391.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/197/j-b-smoove-3940_always_to-be-a-true-comic-you-have-to-have-a-si_1379391.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“To be a true comic, you have to have a signature move. You ever watch wrestling? And your favorite wrestler…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "It's great when a director like Cameron Crowe can take what you do and fit it into what he's doing. If someone's a fan of you already, they can take what you do and make it work for what they're doing. You don't know their vision, and you're thinking, 'How is this guy going to take what I do and make it work in this movie?'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron-crowe-can-take-what-you-do/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/843/j-b-smoove-3940_cameron_it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron_666224.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/843/j-b-smoove-3940_cameron_it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron_666224.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/843/j-b-smoove-3940_cameron_it-s-great-when-a-director-like-cameron_666224.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“It's great when a director like Cameron Crowe can take what you do and fit it into what he's doing. If…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and a writer at 'SNL,' I tell people that everything you do is all a piece of your puzzle to determine where you're going to end up at.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-going-through-my-process-of-being/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a97/j-b-smoove-3940_actor_i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-goin_2862504.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a97/j-b-smoove-3940_actor_i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-goin_2862504.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a97/j-b-smoove-3940_actor_i-tell-people-all-the-time-as-i-was-goin_2862504.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I tell people all the time, as I was going through my process of being a comedian or being an actor and a…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 20, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm sure back in the Greek days or the Roman Empire days, when guys fought in arenas and were fighting lions, people were talking smack. Every era in history has someone talking smack. No way you can have talent and not proclaim your victory.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-roman-empire-days-when-guys/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/435/j-b-smoove-3940_arena_i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-r_2498770.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/435/j-b-smoove-3940_arena_i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-r_2498770.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/435/j-b-smoove-3940_arena_i-m-sure-back-in-the-greek-days-or-the-r_2498770.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm sure back in the Greek days or the Roman Empire days, when guys fought in arenas and were fighting…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 21, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you speak directly at things and don't say you're going to try to do something or that you hope to do something, the universe will work with you. Think about it this way - a boomerang goes out and comes back to you if you throw it. If you throw it out at the universe, it will come back down to you on Earth.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-don-t-say-you-re-going-to-try/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cc/j-b-smoove-3940_about_when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-do_2883476.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cc/j-b-smoove-3940_about_when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-do_2883476.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cc/j-b-smoove-3940_about_when-you-speak-directly-at-things-and-do_2883476.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you speak directly at things and don't say you're going to try to do something or that you hope to do…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 22, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Sometimes you can make friends, and sometimes you can take friends. Sometimes people want to be friends with you, and you gotta be like, 'Okay, I can deal with this person's personality and be their friend, but not necessarily do I have to change who I am. I'm not gonna change myself to be their friend.'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-sometimes-you-can-take-friends/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb3/j-b-smoove-3940_am_sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-somet_2751004.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb3/j-b-smoove-3940_am_sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-somet_2751004.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb3/j-b-smoove-3940_am_sometimes-you-can-make-friends-and-somet_2751004.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Sometimes you can make friends, and sometimes you can take friends. Sometimes people want to be friends with…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 23, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on what they're going to say, and they're not listening. You have to listen in order to see where the other person is going to.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening-as-it-does-you-delivering/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/72e/j-b-smoove-3940_communication_improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening_262148.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/72e/j-b-smoove-3940_communication_improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening_262148.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/72e/j-b-smoove-3940_communication_improv-relies-just-as-much-on-listening_262148.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 24, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand that I want to bring across. Once you figure out your brand and what you do, it's kind of easy at that. You end up getting your audience.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and-what-i-do-in-my-standup/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a0/j-b-smoove-3940_across_i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and_733575.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a0/j-b-smoove-3940_across_i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and_733575.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a0/j-b-smoove-3940_across_i-think-what-i-do-in-my-acting-world-and_733575.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I think what I do in my acting world and what I do in my standup world is bring up a brand that I want to…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 25, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If your boss asks you why you're comin' in late, you say it's 'cause you stayed late.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-in-late-you-say-it-s-cause-you/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6af/j-b-smoove-3940_asks_if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-i_851492.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6af/j-b-smoove-3940_asks_if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-i_851492.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6af/j-b-smoove-3940_asks_if-your-boss-asks-you-why-you-re-comin-i_851492.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If your boss asks you why you're comin' in late, you say it's 'cause you stayed late.” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 26, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You know how you put peanut butter on a piece of bread and the bread falls - it never falls on the bread side down, it always falls peanut butter side down. That's because of gravity.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a-piece-of-bread-and-the-bread/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e5/j-b-smoove-3940_always_you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a_2372006.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e5/j-b-smoove-3940_always_you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a_2372006.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e5/j-b-smoove-3940_always_you-know-how-you-put-peanut-butter-on-a_2372006.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You know how you put peanut butter on a piece of bread and the bread falls - it never falls on the bread…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 27, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm street smart. You can't con me. But that's just from living in New York. Now if a guy came from Mississippi somewhere, Ohio somewhere, to New York City for the first time, he don't have the street smarts. You can take him.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-that-s-just-from-living-in-new/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/139/j-b-smoove-3940_came_i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-th_2613903.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/139/j-b-smoove-3940_came_i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-th_2613903.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/139/j-b-smoove-3940_came_i-m-street-smart-you-can-t-con-me-but-th_2613903.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm street smart. You can't con me. But that's just from living in New York. Now if a guy came from…” — J. B. Smoove", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 28, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I've had jokes stolen a thousand times. But if you can do it better than me, you can have it. I've had jokes stolen from me in the club when I'm next on stage. And my brain will start to turn, and the gears will start turning, and I'll go onstage and create a whole new bit.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "J. B. Smoove" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-b-smoove/i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-but-if-you-can-do-it-better/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/j-b-smoove-3940_better_i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-b_3196623.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/j-b-smoove-3940_better_i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-b_3196623.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/j-b-smoove-3940_better_i-ve-had-jokes-stolen-a-thousand-times-b_3196623.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I've had jokes stolen a thousand times. But if you can do it better than me, you can have it. I've had jokes…” — J. B. 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