--- title: "30 Years Quotes By George Carlin" description: "30 Years quotes by George Carlin. Plus more from George Carlin and more Years sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/009/george-carlin-155_age_i-m-sixty-years-of-age-that-s-16-celsius_3077011.jpg" --- > [I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-m-sixty-years-of-age-that-s-16-celsius/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/009/george-carlin-155_age_i-m-sixty-years-of-age-that-s-16-celsius_3077011.jpg) > [I'm 60 years of age. That's 16 Celsius.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-m-60-years-of-age-that-s-16-celsius/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81f/george-carlin-155_40th-birthday_i-m-60-years-of-age-that-s-16-celsius-24_2494751.jpg) > [What year did Jesus think it was?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/what-year-did-jesus-think-it-was/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c5e/george-carlin-155_funny_what-year-did-jesus-think-it-was-2216067_2216067.jpg) > [Im sixty years of age. Thats 16 Celsius.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/im-sixty-years-of-age-thats-16-celsius/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d45/george-carlin-155_birthday_im-sixty-years-of-age-thats-16-celsius-2_2652107.jpg) > [Geologists claim that although the world is running out of oil, there is still a 200-hundred-year supply of brake fluid.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/geologists-claim-that-although-the-world-is-running-out-of-oil-there/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bbe/george-carlin-155_brake_geologists-claim-that-although-the-world_544648.jpg) > [We spend the early years feeding our brains with information and the latter half trying not to think about it all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-spend-the-early-years-feeding-our-brains-with-information-and-the/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/195/george-carlin-155_brain_we-spend-the-early-years-feeding-our-bra_2018841.jpg) > [We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-not-a-life-we-ve-added-years/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2e/george-carlin-155_funny_we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-n_2545700.jpg) > [The New Testament is not new anymore' it's thousands of years old. It's time to start calling it the Less Old Testament.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-new-testament-is-not-new-anymore-it-s-thousands-of-years-old-it-s/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ca5/george-carlin-155_calling_the-new-testament-is-not-new-anymore-it_871154.jpg) > [If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense? What year did Jesus think it was?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/if-helen-keller-had-psychic-ability-would-you-say-she-had-a-fourth/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d79/george-carlin-155_ability_if-helen-keller-had-psychic-ability-woul_2788531.jpg) > [People say life begins at conception, I say life began about a billion years ago and it's a continuous process.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/people-say-life-begins-at-conception-i-say-life-began-about-a-billion/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c66/george-carlin-155_billions_people-say-life-begins-at-conception-i-s_1445733.jpg) > [You live eighty years, and at best you get about six minutes of pure magic.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-live-eighty-years-and-at-best-you-get-about-six-minutes-of-pure/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ee/george-carlin-155_eighty_you-live-eighty-years-and-at-best-you-ge_1497697.jpg) > [We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-re-having-something-a-little-different-this-year-for-thanksgiving/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f29/george-carlin-155_different_we-re-having-something-a-little-differen_2007854.jpg) > [Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our-lives-when-we-like-to-get/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/305/george-carlin-155_aging_do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our_1112681.jpg) > [I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake-up-in-the-morning-and-if-i/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a6/george-carlin-155_figures_i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake_1418968.jpg) > [You know why we're good at it? Because we get a lot of practice. This country is only 200 years old, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-know-why-we-re-good-at-it-because-we-get-a-lot-of-practice-this/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/860/george-carlin-155_average_you-know-why-we-re-good-at-it-because-we_1262481.jpg) > [Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-lists-for-camping-reservations/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/george-carlin-155_camping_some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-li_2416538.jpg) > [There was about a two-year period at the end of the '60s, when I realized I was in the wrong place and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the-end-of-the-60s-when-i/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/842/george-carlin-155_being-true_there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the_676439.jpg) > [So about 80 years after the Constitution is ratified, the slaves are freed. Not so you'd really notice it of course; just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution-is-ratified-the-slaves-are/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b2e/george-carlin-155_civil-war_so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution_1823675.jpg) > [ The rebellious mood of the country during those \[60th\] years allowed me to plug right back into my old hatreds. I could… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-during-those-60th-years-allowed-me/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/158/george-carlin-155_against-religion_the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-durin_384671.jpg) > [I've just completed a five-year period that can perhaps best be called a breathing spell. A time of getting my health back…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-that-can-perhaps-best-be/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e2/george-carlin-155_abuse_i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-t_763061.jpg) > [We use up words like 'spiritual' so fast in this culture. Twenty years ago spiritual had a distinct meaning. But now there's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-in-this-culture-twenty-years/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/666/george-carlin-155_another-way_we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-i_875709.jpg) > [I went to my old school, where all the kids I'd been with for eight years were about to graduate. But the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-went-to-my-old-school-where-all-the-kids-i-d-been-with-for-eight/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c2f/george-carlin-155_catchy_i-went-to-my-old-school-where-all-the-ki_708267.jpg) > [I'm never critical or judgmental about whether or not a movie is any good. The way I look at it, if several…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-m-never-critical-or-judgmental-about-whether-or-not-a-movie-is-any/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22a/george-carlin-155_clothes_i-m-never-critical-or-judgmental-about-w_2702082.jpg) > [I credit that eight years of grammar school with nourishing me in a direction where I could trust myself and trust my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-school-with-nourishing-me-in-a/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/368/george-carlin-155_atheism_i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-sch_216041.jpg) > [Life is sacred? Who said so, God? Hey, if you read history you'll realize that God is one of the leading causes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-you-read-history-you-ll-realize/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/98d/george-carlin-155_causes_life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-yo_1979560.jpg) > [You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people. I do. I like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-things-i-ve-said-over-the-years/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/53b/george-carlin-155_half_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_171460.jpg) > [You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people... I do... I like…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-things-i-ve-said-over-the-years-2/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af0/george-carlin-155_cynicism_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_483750.jpg) > [When you look at Earth from that one picture, the one from space, it's really a rather attractive thing. I have nothing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/when-you-look-at-earth-from-that-one-picture-the-one-from-space-it-s/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e0/george-carlin-155_asteroids_when-you-look-at-earth-from-that-one-pic_467328.jpg) > [There is nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine ... been here 4 1/2 billion years. We've been here, what,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/there-is-nothing-wrong-with-the-planet-the-planet-is-fine-been-here-4/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/655/george-carlin-155_billions_there-is-nothing-wrong-with-the-planet-t_1069924.jpg) > [I never took reds or Quaaludes to balance out the coke. So when it got to be four in the morning and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-never-took-reds-or-quaaludes-to-balance-out-the-coke-so-when-it-got/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f8d/george-carlin-155_always-looking-forwa_i-never-took-reds-or-quaaludes-to-balanc_1258326.jpg) ## Other authors on Years ## More by George Carlin > [I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-never-go-anywhere-or-do-anything-that-transports-me-outside-the/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [With the proper training, I could've been an evil genius.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/with-the-proper-training-i-could-ve-been-an-evil-genius/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/comedy-although-it-is-not-one-of-the-fine-arts-it-s-a-vulgar-art-it-s/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. ... These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-m-completely-in-favor-of-the-separation-of-church-and-state-these/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [“TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY. Not true. Today is another day. We have no idea what tomorrow is going to be. It might turn out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/tomorrow-is-another-day-not-true-today-is-another-day-we-have-no-idea/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [I was a loner as a child. I had an imaginary friend - I didn't bother with him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-was-a-loner-as-a-child-i-had-an-imaginary-friend-i-didn-t-bother/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/kilometers-are-shorter-than-miles-save-gas-take-your-next-trip-in/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [“If you guys want to get a MOM tattoo and save a little money, just get two letters done. Get about a one-inch capital…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/if-you-guys-want-to-get-a-mom-tattoo-and-save-a-little-money-just-get/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-ve-built-up-so-much-speed-that-you-hit-70-after-that-it-s-a-day/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [It ended suddenly for Brenda, more slowly for me. My runs began getting shorter and less pleasurable. I'd feel bad after only one day,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/it-ended-suddenly-for-brenda-more-slowly-for-me-my-runs-began-getting/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [Is there another word for synonym?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/is-there-another-word-for-synonym/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-whole-idea-of-the-pursuit-of-goods-and-possessions-has-completely/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [These days many politicians are demanding change. Just like homeless people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/these-days-many-politicians-are-demanding-change-just-like-homeless/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-know-the-good-part-about-all-those-executions-in-texas-fewer/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) > [What was the best thing before sliced bread?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/what-was-the-best-thing-before-sliced-bread/) [George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/years/george-carlin/#itemlist", "name": "30 Years Quotes By George Carlin", "numberOfItems": 30, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm sixty years of age. 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We've added years to life, not life to years.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-not-a-life-we-ve-added-years/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2e/george-carlin-155_funny_we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-n_2545700.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2e/george-carlin-155_funny_we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-n_2545700.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2e/george-carlin-155_funny_we-ve-learned-how-to-make-a-living-but-n_2545700.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. 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Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-re-having-something-a-little-different-this-year-for-thanksgiving/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f29/george-carlin-155_different_we-re-having-something-a-little-differen_2007854.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f29/george-carlin-155_different_we-re-having-something-a-little-differen_2007854.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f29/george-carlin-155_different_we-re-having-something-a-little-differen_2007854.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. 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If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our-lives-when-we-like-to-get/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/305/george-carlin-155_aging_do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our_1112681.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/305/george-carlin-155_aging_do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our_1112681.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/305/george-carlin-155_aging_do-you-realize-that-the-only-time-in-our_1112681.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I was a stonehead for 30 years. I'd wake up in the morning and if I couldn't decide whether I wanted a joint or not, I'd smoke a joint to figure it out. And I stayed high all day long.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake-up-in-the-morning-and-if-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a6/george-carlin-155_figures_i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake_1418968.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a6/george-carlin-155_figures_i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake_1418968.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a6/george-carlin-155_figures_i-was-a-stonehead-for-30-years-i-d-wake_1418968.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I was a stonehead for 30 years. 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This country is only 200 years old, and…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-lists-for-camping-reservations/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/george-carlin-155_camping_some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-li_2416538.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/george-carlin-155_camping_some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-li_2416538.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/george-carlin-155_camping_some-national-parks-have-long-waiting-li_2416538.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "There was about a two-year period at the end of the '60s, when I realized I was in the wrong place and entertaining the wrong people with the wrong material and that I was not being true to myself. I went through a metamorphosis into something more authentic for me, a more authentic stage voice and writing voice.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the-end-of-the-60s-when-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/842/george-carlin-155_being-true_there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the_676439.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/842/george-carlin-155_being-true_there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the_676439.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/842/george-carlin-155_being-true_there-was-about-a-two-year-period-at-the_676439.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There was about a two-year period at the end of the '60s, when I realized I was in the wrong place and…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "So about 80 years after the Constitution is ratified, the slaves are freed. Not so you'd really notice it of course; just kinda on paper. And that of course was at the end of the Civil War. Now there is another phrase I dearly love. That is a true oxymoron if I've ever heard one: \"Civil War.\" Do you think anybody in this country could ever really have a civil war? \"Say, pardon me?\" (shoots gun) \"I'm awfully sorry. Awfully sorry.\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution-is-ratified-the-slaves-are/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b2e/george-carlin-155_civil-war_so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution_1823675.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b2e/george-carlin-155_civil-war_so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution_1823675.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b2e/george-carlin-155_civil-war_so-about-80-years-after-the-constitution_1823675.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“So about 80 years after the Constitution is ratified, the slaves are freed. Not so you'd really notice it of…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The rebellious mood of the country during those [60th] years allowed me to plug right back into my old hatreds. I could scream and holler, as I did on the albums, against religion, government, big business - all those assholes and their values. That hatred was very real.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-during-those-60th-years-allowed-me/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/158/george-carlin-155_against-religion_the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-durin_384671.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/158/george-carlin-155_against-religion_the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-durin_384671.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/158/george-carlin-155_against-religion_the-rebellious-mood-of-the-country-durin_384671.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The rebellious mood of the country during those [60th] years allowed me to plug right back into my old…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 20, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I've just completed a five-year period that can perhaps best be called a breathing spell. A time of getting my health back and gathering my strength. That time also included incredible cocaine abuse, a heart attack and my wife's recovery from both alcoholism and cocaine abuse.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-that-can-perhaps-best-be/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e2/george-carlin-155_abuse_i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-t_763061.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e2/george-carlin-155_abuse_i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-t_763061.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e2/george-carlin-155_abuse_i-ve-just-completed-a-five-year-period-t_763061.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I've just completed a five-year period that can perhaps best be called a breathing spell. A time of getting…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 21, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We use up words like 'spiritual' so fast in this culture. Twenty years ago spiritual had a distinct meaning. But now there's a lot of jack-off thinkers who just love to talk about the spiritual. And there is a lot of bogus - is bogosity a word? It should be - a lot of bogosity in these spiritual seekers. So you have to find another way to express it. I just call it 'how I fit'.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-in-this-culture-twenty-years/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/666/george-carlin-155_another-way_we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-i_875709.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/666/george-carlin-155_another-way_we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-i_875709.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/666/george-carlin-155_another-way_we-use-up-words-like-spiritual-so-fast-i_875709.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We use up words like 'spiritual' so fast in this culture. 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They taught me to question and think for myself and to believe in my instincts to such an extent that I just said, \"This is a wonderful fairy tale they have going here, but it's not for me.\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-school-with-nourishing-me-in-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/368/george-carlin-155_atheism_i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-sch_216041.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/368/george-carlin-155_atheism_i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-sch_216041.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/368/george-carlin-155_atheism_i-credit-that-eight-years-of-grammar-sch_216041.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I credit that eight years of grammar school with nourishing me in a direction where I could trust myself and…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 25, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Life is sacred? Who said so, God? Hey, if you read history you'll realize that God is one of the leading causes of death...has been for thousands of years. Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Jews, all taking turns killing each other because God told them it was a good idea.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-you-read-history-you-ll-realize/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/98d/george-carlin-155_causes_life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-yo_1979560.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/98d/george-carlin-155_causes_life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-yo_1979560.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/98d/george-carlin-155_causes_life-is-sacred-who-said-so-god-hey-if-yo_1979560.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Life is sacred? Who said so, God? 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I'm all right with them for a little while, but once you get up past around... a minute, minute and a half, I gotta get the fuck out of there.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-things-i-ve-said-over-the-years/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/53b/george-carlin-155_half_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_171460.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/53b/george-carlin-155_half_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_171460.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/53b/george-carlin-155_half_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_171460.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people. I do. I like…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 27, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people... I do... I like people, but I like them in short bursts. I don't like people for extended periods of time. I'm all right with them for a little while, but once you get past around a minute, minute-and-a-half, I gotta get the f*** outta there.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "George Carlin" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-things-i-ve-said-over-the-years-2/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af0/george-carlin-155_cynicism_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_483750.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af0/george-carlin-155_cynicism_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_483750.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af0/george-carlin-155_cynicism_you-wouldn-t-know-it-from-some-of-the-th_483750.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You wouldn't know it, from some of the things I've said over the years, but I like people... I do... I like…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 28, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you look at Earth from that one picture, the one from space, it's really a rather attractive thing. I have nothing against the planet per se. I root for the big comet or asteroid as a way of cleansing the planet. The comet or asteroid 65 million years ago is probably what gave us our opening to replace the reptiles. 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I…” — George Carlin", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 29, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "There is nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine ... been here 4 1/2 billion years. We've been here, what, a 100,000 years, maybe 200,000. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry a little over 200 years. 200 years versus 4 1/2 billion. And we have the conceit to think that somehow we're a threat? The planet isn't going away. 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