---
title: "1 Wife Gives Quotes By Clement Freud"
description: "1 Wife Gives quotes by Clement Freud. Plus more from Clement Freud and more Wife Gives sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/clement-freud-28859_biscuit_if-anyone-tells-me-i-m-fat-i-say-that-s_563137.png"
---

> [If anyone tells me I'm fat, I say, - That's because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/if-anyone-tells-me-i-m-fat-i-say-that-s-because-every-time-i-make/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/clement-freud-28859_biscuit_if-anyone-tells-me-i-m-fat-i-say-that-s_563137.png)

## More by Clement Freud

> [I find it hard to say, because when I was there it seemed to be shut.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/i-find-it-hard-to-say-because-when-i-was-there-it-seemed-to-be-shut/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [About one thing the Englishman has a particularly strict code. If a bird says Cluk bik bik bik bik and caw you may kill…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/about-one-thing-the-englishman-has-a-particularly-strict-code-if-a/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [To barbecue is a way of life rather than a desirable method of cooking.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/to-barbecue-is-a-way-of-life-rather-than-a-desirable-method-of-cooking/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [If anyone tells me I'm fat, I say, - That's because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/if-anyone-tells-me-i-m-fat-i-say-that-s-because-every-time-i-make/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [I understand it is 13-8 against Egon Ronay publishing a Good Betting Shop Food Guide by 1997.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/i-understand-it-is-13-8-against-egon-ronay-publishing-a-good-betting/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [If you mind losing more than you enjoy winning, don't bet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/if-you-mind-losing-more-than-you-enjoy-winning-don-t-bet/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [The depressing thing about an Englishman's traditional love of animals is the dishonesty thereof ... Get a barbed hook into the upper lip of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/the-depressing-thing-about-an-englishman-s-traditional-love-of/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [There's no law that decrees when not to whinge, but you reach a certain age - 80 seems about right - when you're expected…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/there-s-no-law-that-decrees-when-not-to-whinge-but-you-reach-a/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [In moments of considerable strain, I tend to take to bread-and-butter pudding. There is something about the blandness of soggy bread, the crispness of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/in-moments-of-considerable-strain-i-tend-to-take-to-bread-and-butter/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [I was going to talk about Nicholas Parsons' ignorance, but 18 seconds would be a wholly insufficient time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/i-was-going-to-talk-about-nicholas-parsons-ignorance-but-18-seconds/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [Wine buffs write and talk as though the food and wine will be in your mouth at the same time, that one is there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/wine-buffs-write-and-talk-as-though-the-food-and-wine-will-be-in-your/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/if-you-resolve-to-give-up-smoking-drinking-and-loving-you-don-t/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [Breakfast is a notoriously difficult meal to serve with a flourish.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/breakfast-is-a-notoriously-difficult-meal-to-serve-with-a-flourish/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [It is essential that we understand people for who they are as individuals and not the public perception of them or their family and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/it-is-essential-that-we-understand-people-for-who-they-are-as/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

> [Congealed fat is pretty much the same, irrespective of the delicacy around which it is concealed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clement-freud/congealed-fat-is-pretty-much-the-same-irrespective-of-the-delicacy/)

[Clement Freud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clement-freud/)

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