---
title: "7 Whiskey Quotes By W. C. Fields"
description: "7 Whiskey quotes by W. C. Fields. Plus more from W. C. Fields and more Whiskey sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa1/w-c-fields-1625_blame_we-frequently-hear-of-people-dying-from_316033.jpg"
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> [We frequently hear of people dying from too much drinking. That this happens is a matter of record. But the blame is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/we-frequently-hear-of-people-dying-from-too-much-drinking-that-this/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa1/w-c-fields-1625_blame_we-frequently-hear-of-people-dying-from_316033.jpg)

> [Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/always-carry-a-flagon-of-whiskey-in-case-of-snakebite-and-furthermore/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/380/w-c-fields-1625_whiskey_always-carry-a-flagon-of-whiskey-in-case_440442.png)

> [“I always keep some whiskey handy in case I see a snake...which I also keep handy.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/i-always-keep-some-whiskey-handy-in-case-i-see-a-snake-which-i-also/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fcf/w-c-fields-1625_handy_i-always-keep-some-whiskey-handy-in-case_862086.png)

> [Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/drown-in-a-cold-vat-of-whiskey-death-where-is-thy-sting/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b1a/w-c-fields-1625_cold_drown-in-a-cold-vat-of-whiskey-death-whe_1324319.png)

> [The advantages of whiskey over dogs are legion. Whiskey does not need to be periodically wormed, it does not need to be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/the-advantages-of-whiskey-over-dogs-are-legion-whiskey-does-not-need/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f3d/w-c-fields-1625_advantage_the-advantages-of-whiskey-over-dogs-are_1649140.png)

> [When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/when-life-hands-you-lemons-make-whisky-sours/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18c/w-c-fields-1625_drinking_when-life-hands-you-lemons-make-whisky-s_1885076.png)

> [So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/so-long-as-the-presence-of-death-lurks-with-anyone-who-goes-through/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a26/w-c-fields-1625_death_so-long-as-the-presence-of-death-lurks-w_2537994.jpg)

## Other authors on Whiskey

- [Mark Twain 9 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whiskey/mark-twain/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b006/author-charles-bukowski-22166.jpg) Charles Bukowski 8 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whiskey/charles-bukowski/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b018/author-nikhil-saluja-71464.jpg) Nikhil Saluja 6 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whiskey/nikhil-saluja/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b009/author-ernest-hemingway-33795.jpg) Ernest Hemingway 5 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whiskey/ernest-hemingway/)

## More by W. C. Fields

> [Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/thou-shalt-not-covet-thy-neighbor-s-house-unless-they-have-a-well/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/take-me-down-to-the-bar-we-ll-drink-breakfast-together/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/there-comes-a-time-in-the-affairs-of-man-when-he-must-take-the-bull/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/if-pigs-had-wings-they-would-be-pigeons/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/i-feel-like-a-midget-with-muddy-feet-had-been-walking-over-my-tongue/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/what-would-you-do-if-you-were-president-and-on-the-first-day-of-may/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/my-illness-is-due-to-my-doctor-s-insistence-that-i-drink-milk-a/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/i-am-an-expert-of-electricity-my-father-occupied-the-chair-of-applied/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/bert-williams-was-the-funniest-man-i-ever-saw-and-the-saddest-man-i/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/a-comic-should-suffer-as-much-over-a-single-line-as-a-man-with-a/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/all-my-available-funds-are-completely-tied-up-in-cash/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/back-in-my-rummy-days-i-would-tremble-and-shake-for-hours-upon/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [Happiness means quiet nerves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/happiness-means-quiet-nerves/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [W. C. Fields, a lifetime agnostic, was discovered reading a Bible on his deathbed. ''I'm looking for a loop-hole,'' he explained.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/w-c-fields-a-lifetime-agnostic-was-discovered-reading-a-bible-on-his/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

> [The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/the-movie-people-would-have-nothing-to-do-with-me-until-they-heard-me/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

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