---
title: "47 Way Quotes By George Carlin"
description: "47 Way quotes by George Carlin. Plus more from George Carlin and more Way sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b94/george-carlin-155_able_on-the-other-hand-pot-opens-windows-and_1622396.jpg"
---

> [On the other hand, pot opens windows and doors that you may not be able to get through any other way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/on-the-other-hand-pot-opens-windows-and-doors-that-you-may-not-be/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b94/george-carlin-155_able_on-the-other-hand-pot-opens-windows-and_1622396.jpg)

> [The child molester skipped breakfast, but said he'd grab a little something on the way to work.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-child-molester-skipped-breakfast-but-said-he-d-grab-a-little/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/70f/george-carlin-155_breakfast_the-child-molester-skipped-breakfast-but_1453336.jpg)

> [Spirituality: the last refuge of a failed human. Just another way of distracting yourself from who you really are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/spirituality-the-last-refuge-of-a-failed-human-just-another-way-of/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0e/george-carlin-155_another-way_spirituality-the-last-refuge-of-a-failed_644782.jpg)

> [I suspect there really was more to my accident than bad luck. I think it was God's way of punishing my nose.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-suspect-there-really-was-more-to-my-accident-than-bad-luck-i-think/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f61/george-carlin-155_accident_i-suspect-there-really-was-more-to-my-ac_3093228.jpg)

> [I just try to find targets I feel something about and express it my way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-just-try-to-find-targets-i-feel-something-about-and-express-it-my/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/833/george-carlin-155_feels_i-just-try-to-find-targets-i-feel-someth_2048705.jpg)

> [May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/may-the-forces-of-evil-become-confused-on-the-way-to-your-house/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0e6/george-carlin-155_confused_may-the-forces-of-evil-become-confused-o_885233.jpg)

> [In TV today, you can say I pricked my finger, but you can't say it the other way around.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/in-tv-today-you-can-say-i-pricked-my-finger-but-you-can-t-say-it-the/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/596/george-carlin-155_fingers_in-tv-today-you-can-say-i-pricked-my-fin_1937122.jpg)

> [Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That's just common sense!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/swimming-is-not-a-sport-swimming-is-a-way-to-keep-from-drowning-that/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/47f/george-carlin-155_common_swimming-is-not-a-sport-swimming-is-a-wa_2525873.jpg)

> [If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/if-a-word-is-misspelled-in-the-dictionary-how-would-we-ever-know-if/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9d4/george-carlin-155_dictionary_if-a-word-is-misspelled-in-the-dictionar_578215.jpg)

> [So I do have this ambivalence. Obviously I'm against militaries, because of what militaries do. In many ways though, the air force…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/so-i-do-have-this-ambivalence-obviously-i-m-against-militaries/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/468/george-carlin-155_air_so-i-do-have-this-ambivalence-obviously_2162477.jpg)

> [And this should go without saying. That's why I'm going to say it: Drinking and driving don't mix. Do your drinking early…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/and-this-should-go-without-saying-that-s-why-i-m-going-to-say-it/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9b7/george-carlin-155_drinking_and-this-should-go-without-saying-that-s_2559847.jpg)

> [It's way beyond ironic that a place called the Holy Land is the location of the fiercest, most deeply felt hatred in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/it-s-way-beyond-ironic-that-a-place-called-the-holy-land-is-the/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e64/george-carlin-155_felt_it-s-way-beyond-ironic-that-a-place-call_355156.jpg)

> [I loved the angiogram. They stick a thing in your thigh and it goes all the way up to your heart. Isn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-loved-the-angiogram-they-stick-a-thing-in-your-thigh-and-it-goes/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/654/george-carlin-155_adventure_i-loved-the-angiogram-they-stick-a-thing_1144577.jpg)

> [I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no "I" in team.' What you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-often-warn-people-somewhere-along-the-way-someone-is-going-to-tell/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ac/george-carlin-155_football_i-often-warn-people-somewhere-along-the_2356437.jpg)

> [I became a guy who wanted to be a comedian someday, or a comic actor. The way I put it was, I'll…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-became-a-guy-who-wanted-to-be-a-comedian-someday-or-a-comic-actor/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4d4/george-carlin-155_actors_i-became-a-guy-who-wanted-to-be-a-comedi_3210267.jpg)

> [Language is the most elementary aspect to our humanness, probably. In addition to that, it's the embodiment, it's the apotheosis of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/language-is-the-most-elementary-aspect-to-our-humanness-probably-in/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/155/george-carlin-155_apotheosis_language-is-the-most-elementary-aspect-t_178368.jpg)

> [No, there's no God, but there might be some sort of an organizing intelligence, and I think to understand it is way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/no-there-s-no-god-but-there-might-be-some-sort-of-an-organizing/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/972/george-carlin-155_ability_no-there-s-no-god-but-there-might-be-som_1972731.jpg)

> [Government want to tell you things you can't say because they're against the law, or you can't say this because it's against…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/government-want-to-tell-you-things-you-can-t-say-because-they-re/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/567/george-carlin-155_games_government-want-to-tell-you-things-you-c_2895120.jpg)

> [I, myself, have killed six people. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. And, let me tell you,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-myself-have-killed-six-people-all-random-all-undetected-no-way-to/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/789/george-carlin-155_comedian_i-myself-have-killed-six-people-all-rand_691390.jpg)

> [I don't care much about the outcome. I'd like for people to feel better and have better lives, but I don't think…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-don-t-care-much-about-the-outcome-i-d-like-for-people-to-feel/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1db/george-carlin-155_action_i-don-t-care-much-about-the-outcome-i-d_648250.jpg)

> [All Christian religions are outer-directed. "Who can I convert?" "Let's go to this country and make them Christians." "Wear this." "Do that."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/all-christian-religions-are-outer-directed-who-can-i-convert-let-s-go/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/898/george-carlin-155_approach_all-christian-religions-are-outer-direct_2730848.jpg)

> [How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/how-come-when-it-s-us-it-s-an-abortion-and-when-it-s-a-chicken-it-s-2/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b77/george-carlin-155_abortion_how-come-when-it-s-us-it-s-an-abortion-a_380703.jpg)

> [My money buys me the freedom not to be a member of the corporate structure. And I certainly don't feel guilty or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/my-money-buys-me-the-freedom-not-to-be-a-member-of-the-corporate/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6c1/george-carlin-155_corporate_my-money-buys-me-the-freedom-not-to-be-a_2353949.jpg)

> [What I became a comedian for was to get my art out. To get some of these feelings and things I had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/what-i-became-a-comedian-for-was-to-get-my-art-out-to-get-some-of/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fd/george-carlin-155_art_what-i-became-a-comedian-for-was-to-get_176374.jpg)

> [I look at it this way... For centuries now, man has done everything he can to destroy, defile, and interfere with nature:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-look-at-it-this-way-for-centuries-now-man-has-done-everything-he/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2af/george-carlin-155_aquifers_i-look-at-it-this-way-for-centuries-now_1529795.jpg)

> [The ending of my experience with cocaine came in a periodic way. I would get high less frequently, I would use smaller…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-ending-of-my-experience-with-cocaine-came-in-a-periodic-way-i/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/450/george-carlin-155_amount_the-ending-of-my-experience-with-cocaine_2925761.jpg)

> [Someone said, and rightfully, that "property is theft'." There's no way a man can stand and tell me that he owns an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/someone-said-and-rightfully-that-property-is-theft-there-s-no-way-a/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/340/george-carlin-155_apple-trees_someone-said-and-rightfully-that-propert_1908222.jpg)

> [They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f\*\*kin' place. It's a big club and you ain't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/they-ll-get-it-all-from-you-sooner-or-later-cause-they-own-this-f-kin/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8c9/george-carlin-155_beats_they-ll-get-it-all-from-you-sooner-or-la_1920216.jpg)

> [I don't think drugs are a problem; I think they're a symptom. As long as Americans are empty, spiritually, emotionally, morally empty,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-don-t-think-drugs-are-a-problem-i-think-they-re-a-symptom-as-long/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e0/george-carlin-155_better-job_i-don-t-think-drugs-are-a-problem-i-thin_1469075.jpg)

> [Humor is based on surprise, and surprise is a milder way of saying shock. It's surprise that makes the joke.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/humor-is-based-on-surprise-and-surprise-is-a-milder-way-of-saying/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/294/george-carlin-155_comedy_humor-is-based-on-surprise-and-surprise_3122054.jpg)

> [The owner of a Florida massage parlor has been arrested by police. "There weren't any serious violations," said the officers, "she just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-owner-of-a-florida-massage-parlor-has-been-arrested-by-police/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44b/george-carlin-155_arrested_the-owner-of-a-florida-massage-parlor-ha_3089038.jpg)

> [I think we overrate ourselves in terms of our abilities and capacities. I mean, just because you can build a really swell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-think-we-overrate-ourselves-in-terms-of-our-abilities-and/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7df/george-carlin-155_ability_i-think-we-overrate-ourselves-in-terms-o_3015555.jpg)

> [The best thing about living at the water's edge: You only have assholes on three sides of you, and if they come…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-best-thing-about-living-at-the-water-s-edge-you-only-have/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b9/george-carlin-155_assholes_the-best-thing-about-living-at-the-water_844532.jpg)

> [People get all upset about torture, but when you get right down to it, it's really a pretty good way of finding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/people-get-all-upset-about-torture-but-when-you-get-right-down-to-it/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a3/george-carlin-155_findings_people-get-all-upset-about-torture-but-w_2023959.jpg)

> [I never take credit for anything, because it's mostly genetic to my way of thinking. Even the need to work hard with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-never-take-credit-for-anything-because-it-s-mostly-genetic-to-my/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/19d/george-carlin-155_credit_i-never-take-credit-for-anything-because_860175.jpg)

> [Voting is a meaningless exercise. I'm not going to waste my time with it. These parties, these politicians are given to us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/voting-is-a-meaningless-exercise-i-m-not-going-to-waste-my-time-with/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/456/george-carlin-155_choices_voting-is-a-meaningless-exercise-i-m-not_132166.jpg)

> [I was kind of sweet kid, according my mother, and my recollections. Thoughtful and good, but kind of alone - although I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-was-kind-of-sweet-kid-according-my-mother-and-my-recollections/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3c/george-carlin-155_children_i-was-kind-of-sweet-kid-according-my-mot_2357768.jpg)

> [You know, if a drug has anything going for it at all, it should be self-limiting. It should tell you when you've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-know-if-a-drug-has-anything-going-for-it-at-all-it-should-be-self/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7d4/george-carlin-155_acid_you-know-if-a-drug-has-anything-going-fo_509900.jpg)

> [To my way of thinking, there is every bit as much evidence for the existence of UFOs as there is for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/to-my-way-of-thinking-there-is-every-bit-as-much-evidence-for-the/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7fe/george-carlin-155_cases_to-my-way-of-thinking-there-is-every-bit_185275.jpg)

> [“Of course, in Los Angeles, everything is based on driving, even the killings. In New York, most people don't have cars, so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/of-course-in-los-angeles-everything-is-based-on-driving-even-the/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b00/george-carlin-155_car_of-course-in-los-angeles-everything-is-b_1130920.jpg)

## Other authors on Way

## More by George Carlin

> [I never go anywhere or do anything that transports me outside the boundaries of my mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-never-go-anywhere-or-do-anything-that-transports-me-outside-the/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [With the proper training, I could've been an evil genius.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/with-the-proper-training-i-could-ve-been-an-evil-genius/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/comedy-although-it-is-not-one-of-the-fine-arts-it-s-a-vulgar-art-it-s/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. ... These two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-m-completely-in-favor-of-the-separation-of-church-and-state-these/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [“TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY. Not true. Today is another day. We have no idea what tomorrow is going to be. It might turn out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/tomorrow-is-another-day-not-true-today-is-another-day-we-have-no-idea/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [I was a loner as a child. I had an imaginary friend - I didn't bother with him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/i-was-a-loner-as-a-child-i-had-an-imaginary-friend-i-didn-t-bother/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/kilometers-are-shorter-than-miles-save-gas-take-your-next-trip-in/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [“If you guys want to get a MOM tattoo and save a little money, just get two letters done. Get about a one-inch capital…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/if-you-guys-want-to-get-a-mom-tattoo-and-save-a-little-money-just-get/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-ve-built-up-so-much-speed-that-you-hit-70-after-that-it-s-a-day/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [It ended suddenly for Brenda, more slowly for me. My runs began getting shorter and less pleasurable. I'd feel bad after only one day,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/it-ended-suddenly-for-brenda-more-slowly-for-me-my-runs-began-getting/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [Is there another word for synonym?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/is-there-another-word-for-synonym/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [The whole idea of the pursuit of goods and possessions has completely corrupted the human experience, along with religion, which I think limits the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/the-whole-idea-of-the-pursuit-of-goods-and-possessions-has-completely/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [These days many politicians are demanding change. Just like homeless people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/these-days-many-politicians-are-demanding-change-just-like-homeless/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/you-know-the-good-part-about-all-those-executions-in-texas-fewer/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

> [What was the best thing before sliced bread?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/what-was-the-best-thing-before-sliced-bread/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

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                        "text": "No, there's no God, but there might be some sort of an organizing intelligence, and I think to understand it is way beyond our ability. It's certainly not a judgmental entity. It's certainly not paternalistic and all these qualities that have been attributed to God.",
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                        "text": "Government want to tell you things you can't say because they're against the law, or you can't say this because it's against a regulation, or here's something you can't say because its a...secret; \"You can't tell him that because he's not cleared to know that.\" Government wants to control information and control language because that's the way you control thought, and basically that's the game they're in.",
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                        "text": "I, myself, have killed six people. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. And, let me tell you, there's nothin' like it. It's a great feeling. Yeah, I know, you're thinking. 'Aw, he's a comedian. He's just sayin' that stuff.' Good. That's exactly what I want you to think.",
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                        "text": "I don't care much about the outcome. I'd like for people to feel better and have better lives, but I don't think that's in the cards through political action. I think bloodshed is still the way you get dramatic change. That'll never happen because they've got all the guns now. At least they've got the nice guns, the big ones, the ones with night vision.",
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                        "text": "All Christian religions are outer-directed. \"Who can I convert?\" \"Let's go to this country and make them Christians.\" \"Wear this.\" \"Do that.\" \"No, don't worship that way. Worship this way or I'll kill you - for the good of your soul, of course.\" Meanwhile, followers of Eastern religions are sitting in the middle of their minds, experiencing a bliss and a level of consciousness that Western man can't begin to approach.",
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                        "text": "How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen; that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens. See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.",
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                        "text": "My money buys me the freedom not to be a member of the corporate structure. And I certainly don't feel guilty or hypocritical about that. The way our economy is set up, if you don't want to be a corporate moron and you don't want to be enfeebled in the streets, you must earn enough to know that you'll never have to go to them for money.",
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                        "text": "What I became a comedian for was to get my art out. To get some of these feelings and things I had on my chest out. I don't care if people believe them, listen to them, change their ways, or think, or any of that kind of crap. I'm interested in showing off. I'm the same kid from sixth grade who stood up and said \"watch this.\"",
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                        "text": "I look at it this way... For centuries now, man has done everything he can to destroy, defile, and interfere with nature: clear-cutting forests, strip-mining mountains, poisoning the atmosphere, over-fishing the oceans, polluting the rivers and lakes, destroying wetlands and aquifers... so when nature strikes back, and smacks him on the head and kicks him in the nuts, I enjoy that. I have absolutely no sympathy for human beings whatsoever. None. And no matter what kind of problem humans are facing, whether it's natural or man-made, I always hope it gets worse.",
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                        "text": "The ending of my experience with cocaine came in a periodic way. I would get high less frequently, I would use smaller amounts, and I would do coke for less periods of time. And that process just kept increasing and increasing until I wasn't using it at all. I didn't go on a program anywhere. I didn't join an organization or detox anywhere. I just slowly tapered off until it was gone. That was also true of my heavy pot use. I just tapered off until there was almost no use at all. And the same thing was true of drinking tons of beer.",
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                        "text": "Someone said, and rightfully, that \"property is theft'.\" There's no way a man can stand and tell me that he owns an apple tree. I just don't believe you. And so this pursuit of position and money and power, they are all wrapped up into one package that I think is crippling, debilitating and limiting. And unfortunately, people get sucked into it and then they've got you on the treadmill. You know: ''You've got to have a good job'' and \"You've got to have a good education'' - which is another word for indoctrination. We're never going to rise above these limitations we've placed on ourselves.",
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                        "text": "They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. It's a big club and you ain't in it. You and I are not in the big club. By the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. The table is tilted, folks. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Nobody seems to care. Good, honest, hard-working people: white collar, blue collar, it doesn't matter what color shirt you have on.",
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                        "text": "I don't think drugs are a problem; I think they're a symptom. As long as Americans are empty, spiritually, emotionally, morally empty, they will need things like the drugs they choose to use. Mankind has wanted to change the way it felt from the beginning anyway. In this country there are even more reasons to want to feel different, to want to feel better, because this is such a neon sewer. This is such a degrading culture. It forces you to play Beethoven to your child in the uterus so that he will get into a better school and a better job and make more money so he can take care of you.",
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                        "text": "Humor is based on surprise, and surprise is a milder way of saying shock. It's surprise that makes the joke.",
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                        "text": "You know, if a drug has anything going for it at all, it should be self-limiting. It should tell you when you've had enough. Acid and peyote were that way for me.",
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                        "text": "“Of course, in Los Angeles, everything is based on driving, even the killings. In New York, most people don't have cars, so if you want to kill a person, you have to take the subway to their house. And sometimes on the way, the train is delayed and you get impatient, so you have to kill someone on the subway. That's why there are so many subway murders; no one has a car.”",
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