--- title: "11 Way Quotes By Bill Hicks" description: "11 Way quotes by Bill Hicks. Plus more from Bill Hicks and more Way sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg" --- > [I am available for children's parties, by the way ...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by-the-way/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg) > [Is it impossible to imagine Americans sneaking into Mexico en masse, seeking regular employment and a better way of life?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sneaking-into-mexico-en-masse/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82c/bill-hicks-970_better-way_is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sn_2098135.jpg) > [What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn't it?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/what-did-moths-bump-into-before-the-electric-light-bulb-was-invented/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d8d/bill-hicks-970_boys_what-did-moths-bump-into-before-the-elec_1565019.jpg) > [Well we looked at all the people in the Bible and we added 'em up all the way back to Adam and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/well-we-looked-at-all-the-people-in-the-bible-and-we-added-em-up-all/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b55/bill-hicks-970_adam_well-we-looked-at-all-the-people-in-the_261350.jpg) > [I was always 'awake'...Some part of me clamoring for NEW insights and NEW ways to make the world a better place.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-was-always-awake-some-part-of-me-clamoring-for-new-insights-and-new/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e99/bill-hicks-970_awake_i-was-always-awake-some-part-of-me-clamo_2240409.jpg) > [And on the seventh day, god stepped back and said and said, "This is my creation, perfect in every way... oh, dammit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back-and-said-and-said-this-is-my/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f02/bill-hicks-970_creation_and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back_1906848.jpg) > [I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the exact same way we do,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-which-was-really-interesting/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/448/bill-hicks-970_australia_i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-wh_955779.jpg) > [Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-system-anything-that-questions-a/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f95/bill-hicks-970_amount_christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-syst_53589.jpg) > [I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. OK, not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-growing-naturally-upon-our-2/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/034/bill-hicks-970_believe_i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-gr_1608745.jpg) > [People are bringing shotguns to UFO sightings in Fife, Alabama. I asked a guy, "Why do you bring a gun to a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sightings-in-fife-alabama-i-asked/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c7c/bill-hicks-970_abduction_people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sigh_3005741.jpg) > [How many of y'all wondered, like I did, during the LA riots when those people were being pulled out of their trucks…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-during-the-la-riots-when-those/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b0/bill-hicks-970_america_how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-du_2534246.jpg) ## Other authors on Way ## More by Bill Hicks > [ I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. \[salutes\] ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-ll-smoke-i-ll-cough-i-ll-get-the-tumors-i-ll-die-deal-thank-you/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [not all drugs are good.. some of them are great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/not-all-drugs-are-good-some-of-them-are-great/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [If you don't think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD's and burn them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/if-you-don-t-think-drugs-have-done-good-things-for-us-then-take-all/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-don-t-do-drugs-anymore-than-say-the-average-touring-funk-band/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/how-many-people-disapprove-of-the-job-the-conservatives-are-doing/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You're not a human being until you're in my phone book.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/btw-a-24-week-old-embryo-is-not-a-human-being-you-re-not-a-human/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of Satan by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-system-anything-that-questions-a/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-m-just-trying-to-rid-the-world-of-all-these-fevered-egos-that-are/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [I was told when I grew up I could be anything I wanted: a fireman, a policeman, a doctor – even President, it seemed.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-was-told-when-i-grew-up-i-could-be-anything-i-wanted-a-fireman-a/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [Good comedy helps people know they're not alone. Great comedy provides an answer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/good-comedy-helps-people-know-they-re-not-alone-great-comedy-provides/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/people-ask-me-what-i-think-about-that-woman-priest-thing-what-a-woman/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/oh-sorry-i-was-taking-life-seriously/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [I can't watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-can-t-watch-tv-longer-than-five-minutes-without-praying-for-nuclear/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [I'm not really a heavy smoker any more. I only get through two lighters a day now.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-m-not-really-a-heavy-smoker-any-more-i-only-get-through-two/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) > [You watch the news these days? It's unbelievable. You think you just walk out your door, you're immediately gonna be raped by some crack-addicted,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/you-watch-the-news-these-days-it-s-unbelievable-you-think-you-just/) [Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/bill-hicks/#itemlist", "name": "11 Way Quotes By Bill Hicks", "numberOfItems": 11, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I am available for children's parties, by the way ...", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by-the-way/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I am available for children's parties, by the way ...” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Is it impossible to imagine Americans sneaking into Mexico en masse, seeking regular employment and a better way of life?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sneaking-into-mexico-en-masse/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82c/bill-hicks-970_better-way_is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sn_2098135.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82c/bill-hicks-970_better-way_is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sn_2098135.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82c/bill-hicks-970_better-way_is-it-impossible-to-imagine-americans-sn_2098135.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Is it impossible to imagine Americans sneaking into Mexico en masse, seeking regular employment and a better…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? 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Now they'll think I want them to smoke it... Now I have to create Republicans.\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back-and-said-and-said-this-is-my/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f02/bill-hicks-970_creation_and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back_1906848.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f02/bill-hicks-970_creation_and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back_1906848.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f02/bill-hicks-970_creation_and-on-the-seventh-day-god-stepped-back_1906848.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“And on the seventh day, god stepped back and said and said, \"This is my creation, perfect in every way…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the exact same way we do, commemorating the death and resurrection of Jesus by telling our children that a giant bunny rabbit left chocolate eggs in the night. Now I wonder why we're f-ked up as a race. I've read the Bible. I can't find the word \"bunny\" or \"chocolate\" anywhere in the f-king book.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-which-was-really-interesting/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/448/bill-hicks-970_australia_i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-wh_955779.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/448/bill-hicks-970_australia_i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-wh_955779.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/448/bill-hicks-970_australia_i-was-over-in-australia-during-easter-wh_955779.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of Satan by the very fact that it makes you question a belief. It's a very interesting defense mechanism and the only way to get by it -- and believe me, I was raised Southern Baptist -- is to take massive amounts of mushrooms, sit in a field, and just go, \"Show me.\".", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-system-anything-that-questions-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f95/bill-hicks-970_amount_christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-syst_53589.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f95/bill-hicks-970_amount_christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-syst_53589.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f95/bill-hicks-970_amount_christianity-has-a-built-in-defense-syst_53589.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. OK, not the most popular idea ever expressed. Either that or you're all real high and agreeing with me in the only way you can right now. (Starts blinking)", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-growing-naturally-upon-our-2/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/034/bill-hicks-970_believe_i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-gr_1608745.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/034/bill-hicks-970_believe_i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-gr_1608745.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/034/bill-hicks-970_believe_i-believe-that-god-left-certain-drugs-gr_1608745.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "People are bringing shotguns to UFO sightings in Fife, Alabama. I asked a guy, \"Why do you bring a gun to a UFO sighting?\" Guy said, \"Way-ul, we didn' wanna be ab-duc-ted.\" If I lived in Fife, Alabama, I would be on my hands and knees every night praying for abduction.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sightings-in-fife-alabama-i-asked/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c7c/bill-hicks-970_abduction_people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sigh_3005741.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c7c/bill-hicks-970_abduction_people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sigh_3005741.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c7c/bill-hicks-970_abduction_people-are-bringing-shotguns-to-ufo-sigh_3005741.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“People are bringing shotguns to UFO sightings in Fife, Alabama. I asked a guy, \"Why do you bring a gun to a…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "How many of y'all wondered, like I did, during the LA riots when those people were being pulled out of their trucks and beaten half to death - step on the f***ing gas, man! They're on foot, you're in a truck - I think I see a way out of this.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Bill Hicks" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-during-the-la-riots-when-those/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b0/bill-hicks-970_america_how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-du_2534246.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b0/bill-hicks-970_america_how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-du_2534246.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b0/bill-hicks-970_america_how-many-of-y-all-wondered-like-i-did-du_2534246.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“How many of y'all wondered, like I did, during the LA riots when those people were being pulled out of their…” — Bill Hicks", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/bill-hicks/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/bill-hicks/", "name": "Way Quotes by Bill Hicks", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/way/bill-hicks/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/984/bill-hicks-970_available_i-am-available-for-children-s-parties-by_1255874.jpg" }, "description": "11 Way quotes by Bill Hicks. 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