--- title: "10 Want Quotes By Adam Carolla" description: "10 Want quotes by Adam Carolla. Plus more from Adam Carolla and more Want sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f57/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-pick_1052590.png" --- > [I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-picking-my-nose-at-least-i-m-that/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f57/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-pick_1052590.png) > [All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be-this-aren-t-you-glad-you-re/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/adam-carolla-2058_glad_all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be_1267490.png) > [I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-not-comically-oriented-i-get-angry-and-i-start-complaining-and/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d24/adam-carolla-2058_angry_i-m-not-comically-oriented-i-get-angry-a_739657.png) > [If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/if-you-want-to-have-a-good-life-you-should-focus-on-your-family-on/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/300/adam-carolla-2058_business_if-you-want-to-have-a-good-life-you-shou_1626525.png) > [Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/well-the-post-office-is-probably-not-the-place-you-want-to-go-if-you/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b6/adam-carolla-2058_office_well-the-post-office-is-probably-not-the_592933.png) > [I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work-for-myself-i-make-plenty-of/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/adam-carolla-2058_money_i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work_2330561.png) > [We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to-the-same-stimuli-if-you-want/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc6/adam-carolla-2058_animal_we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to_792341.png) > [When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. Those dads that go off to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-that-you-do-not-want-to-do-them/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a77/adam-carolla-2058_christmas_when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-th_769748.jpg) > [Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basketball-games-every-day-of-the/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c51/adam-carolla-2058_ball-game_millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basket_1238719.png) > [I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you-soft-and-by-the-way-you/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2a/adam-carolla-2058_coffee_i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you_2325763.png) ## Other authors on Want ## More by Adam Carolla > [“One of the classier features of this home was the padded toilet seat. It was high-mileage puffy brown vinyl-colored foam and made that weird…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/one-of-the-classier-features-of-this-home-was-the-padded-toilet-seat/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-give-women-two-types-of-orgasms-fake-and-none/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life...so, something that is potentially four months down the road is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-really-just-trying-to-hash-out-the-next-two-weeks-of-my-life-so/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-think-i-ve-ever-seen-pie-advertised-that-s-how-you-know-it-s/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-think-healthcare-s-a-right-the-only-right-you-have-is-the/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-like-my-parents-but-they-are-just-not-good-parents-they-are-nice/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/people-have-to-be-realistic-or-the-dream-just-drags-on/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [“But our leaders can’t tell the truth. We won’t let them. We’ve created a society where the politicians aren’t allowed to criticize the people.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/but-our-leaders-can-t-tell-the-truth-we-won-t-let-them-we-ve-created/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-cook-a-little-bit-i-make-a-hungarian-dish-called-chicken-paprikash/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/when-i-m-in-power-here-s-how-i-m-gonna-put-the-country-back-on-its/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/the-main-thing-that-i-learned-from-my-horrible-job-experiences-was/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-think-comedy-has-evolved-like-every-art-form-and-people-probably-do/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/you-should-feel-good-about-yourself-because-of-your-accomplishments/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [“Here’s a handy list of warning signs of the worst people on the road. Some are tuned-out menaces, others are just assholes. Be alert,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/here-s-a-handy-list-of-warning-signs-of-the-worst-people-on-the-road/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) > [I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-have-anything-against-my-mom-but-my-family-has-no-emotional/) [Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/want/adam-carolla/#itemlist", "name": "10 Want Quotes By Adam Carolla", "numberOfItems": 10, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-picking-my-nose-at-least-i-m-that/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f57/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-pick_1052590.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f57/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-pick_1052590.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f57/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-swear-my-car-won-t-run-unless-i-m-pick_1052590.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't…” — Adam Carolla", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be-this-aren-t-you-glad-you-re/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/adam-carolla-2058_glad_all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be_1267490.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/adam-carolla-2058_glad_all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be_1267490.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d82/adam-carolla-2058_glad_all-tv-is-is-really-don-t-you-want-to-be_1267490.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' 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I make plenty of money working for myself.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work-for-myself-i-make-plenty-of/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/adam-carolla-2058_money_i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work_2330561.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/adam-carolla-2058_money_i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work_2330561.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/adam-carolla-2058_money_i-want-to-work-for-myself-and-i-do-work_2330561.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.” — Adam Carolla", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it. Telling them to stop isn't going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to-the-same-stimuli-if-you-want/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc6/adam-carolla-2058_animal_we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to_792341.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc6/adam-carolla-2058_animal_we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to_792341.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc6/adam-carolla-2058_animal_we-re-all-animals-that-we-all-respond-to_792341.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have…” — Adam Carolla", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn't imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I'm gone for six days it feels like too much.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-that-you-do-not-want-to-do-them/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a77/adam-carolla-2058_christmas_when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-th_769748.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a77/adam-carolla-2058_christmas_when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-th_769748.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a77/adam-carolla-2058_christmas_when-you-have-kids-you-instantly-feel-th_769748.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. Those dads that go off to…” — Adam Carolla", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basketball-games-every-day-of-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c51/adam-carolla-2058_ball-game_millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basket_1238719.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c51/adam-carolla-2058_ball-game_millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basket_1238719.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c51/adam-carolla-2058_ball-game_millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basket_1238719.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But…” — Adam Carolla", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Adam Carolla" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you-soft-and-by-the-way-you/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2a/adam-carolla-2058_coffee_i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you_2325763.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2a/adam-carolla-2058_coffee_i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you_2325763.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2a/adam-carolla-2058_coffee_i-don-t-like-soccer-i-think-it-makes-you_2325763.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. 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