---
title: "1 Time Masturbate Quotes By Peter Griffin"
description: "1 Time Masturbate quotes by Peter Griffin. Plus more from Peter Griffin and more Time Masturbate sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e0d/peter-griffin-16801_decision-making_life-is-full-of-important-decisions-like_846881.jpg"
---

> [Life is full of important decisions like whether or not you got time to masturbate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/life-is-full-of-important-decisions-like-whether-or-not-you-got-time/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e0d/peter-griffin-16801_decision-making_life-is-full-of-important-decisions-like_846881.jpg)

## More by Peter Griffin

> [Hey Brian! I turned the stairs into a waterslide!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/hey-brian-i-turned-the-stairs-into-a-waterslide/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Lois, this isn't my Batman glass.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-lois-this/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Be careful who you're calling a child, Lois, because if I'm a child, that makes you a pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/be-careful-who-you-re-calling-a-child-lois-because-if-i-m-a-child/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Just don't forget our deal, Lois. I sit through this and later tonight I get anal. You hear me? No matter how neat I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/just-don-t-forget-our-deal-lois-i-sit-through-this-and-later-tonight/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [I'd say, 'Come again?' and I'd laugh as I said, 'Come.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/i-d-say-come-again-and-i-d-laugh-as-i-said-come/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [“I just read an article on the dangers of heavy drinking...scared the hell out of me. So that's it, after today...no more reading”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/i-just-read-an-article-on-the-dangers-of-heavy-drinking-scared-the/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [If you have a problem, tell it to my butt, its the only one that gives a crap!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/if-you-have-a-problem-tell-it-to-my-butt-its-the-only-one-that-gives/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Dear MacGuyver, Enclosed is a rubber band, a paper clip, and a drinking straw. Please save my dog.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/dear-macguyver-enclosed-is-a-rubber-band-a-paper-clip-and-a-drinking/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Life is full of important decisions like whether or not you got time to masturbate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/life-is-full-of-important-decisions-like-whether-or-not-you-got-time/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Hey hey, where the hell is that Peter Griffin? He told me he'd give me a hundred dollars if I took off all my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/hey-hey-where-the-hell-is-that-peter-griffin-he-told-me-he-d-give-me/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Holy Crip it's a crapple.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/holy-crip-it-s-a-crapple/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Yep, now here's the plan: You'll enter through the air contitioning duct here. Now there'll be an invisible laser grid three inches from the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/yep-now-here-s-the-plan-you-ll-enter-through-the-air-contitioning/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Lois this family believes in the Easter bunny, he died for our sins in that helicopter crash.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/lois-this-family-believes-in-the-easter-bunny-he-died-for-our-sins-in/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if I'm going stand here and take this from a pervert.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/if-i-m-a-child-that-means-you-re-a-pedophile-and-i-ll-be-damned-if-i/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

> [Well, I'm gettin' something really special too. And by special I don't mean special like that Kleinaman boy down the street. More special like...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-griffin/well-i-m-gettin-something-really-special-too-and-by-special-i-don-t/)

[Peter Griffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-griffin/)

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