---
title: "68 Taco bell Quotes by 59 authors"
description: "Browse 68 Taco bell quotes by 59 authors. Discover the best Taco bell sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d24/karen-smith-68461_bell_do-you-wanna-do-something-fun-wanna-go-t_3225345.jpg"
---

> [Do you wanna do something fun? Wanna go to Taco Bell?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-smith/do-you-wanna-do-something-fun-wanna-go-to-taco-bell/)

[Karen Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d24/karen-smith-68461_bell_do-you-wanna-do-something-fun-wanna-go-t_3225345.jpg)

> [“Quiero Taco Bell, asshole?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-roux/quiero-taco-bell-asshole/)

[Abigail Roux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-roux/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1b3/abigail-roux-1114_taco-bell_quiero-taco-bell-asshole-2092088_2092088.jpg)

> [“I treated Katie to Taco Bell on the way to the rink.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debra-sue-brice/i-treated-katie-to-taco-bell-on-the-way-to-the-rink/)

[Debra Sue Brice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debra-sue-brice/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/045/debra-sue-brice-45570_taco-bell_i-treated-katie-to-taco-bell-on-the-way_2175806.jpg)

> [My favorite thing from Taco Bell is the Doritos Locos Tacos Supreme.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trippie-redd/my-favorite-thing-from-taco-bell-is-the-doritos-locos-tacos-supreme/)

[Trippie Redd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trippie-redd/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63f/trippie-redd-14240_bell_my-favorite-thing-from-taco-bell-is-the_1558485.jpg)

> [I'd take a helicopter up and throw microwave ovens down on the Taco Bell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-coupland/i-d-take-a-helicopter-up-and-throw-microwave-ovens-down-on-the-taco/)

[Douglas Coupland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-coupland/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/douglas-coupland-305_bells_i-d-take-a-helicopter-up-and-throw-micro_3115463.jpg)

> [Thanks a lot for mentioning taco bell, my long lost love of fake Mexican food.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/thanks-a-lot-for-mentioning-taco-bell-my-long-lost-love-of-fake/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/097/anonymous-1_gratitude_thanks-a-lot-for-mentioning-taco-bell-my_1582418.jpg)

> [I love Taco Bell. Whenever I go there, I could get anything on the menu and be totally happy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-massoglia/i-love-taco-bell-whenever-i-go-there-i-could-get-anything-on-the-menu/)

[Chris Massoglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-massoglia/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/605/chris-massoglia-46717_bells_i-love-taco-bell-whenever-i-go-there-i-c_1125420.png)

> [So I got gas yesterday for $1.39! Too bad it was only from Taco Bell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/so-i-got-gas-yesterday-for-1-39-too-bad-it-was-only-from-taco-bell/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f5b/anonymous-1_food_so-i-got-gas-yesterday-for-1-39-too-bad_2777374.jpg)

> [When you're getting $2,000 a month in the minors, it's hard not to eat Taco Bell every day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcus-giles/when-you-re-getting-2-000-a-month-in-the-minors-it-s-hard-not-to-eat/)

[Marcus Giles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcus-giles/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/966/marcus-giles-33936_bells_when-you-re-getting-2-000-a-month-in-the_2842847.png)

> [Eating Taco Bell is like sleeping with your ex. I feel horrible afterwards and I'm always drunk when I do it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/eating-taco-bell-is-like-sleeping-with-your-ex-i-feel-horrible/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d70/anonymous-1_ex-boyfriend_eating-taco-bell-is-like-sleeping-with-y_2287748.jpg)

> [If I'd had to work at Taco Bell I'd have still been out at night trying to play music.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-petty/if-i-d-had-to-work-at-taco-bell-i-d-have-still-been-out-at-night/)

[Tom Petty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-petty/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a08/tom-petty-2030_bells_if-i-d-had-to-work-at-taco-bell-i-d-have_1638630.png)

> [If I have pizza or Taco Bell one day, I'll have home-cooked meals the next. I try to listen to what my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashlee-simpson/if-i-have-pizza-or-taco-bell-one-day-i-ll-have-home-cooked-meals-the/)

[Ashlee Simpson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashlee-simpson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ce7/ashlee-simpson-12893_bells_if-i-have-pizza-or-taco-bell-one-day-i-l_2589944.png)

> [I'm famous for splurging at fast-food places. I'm currently obsessed with Taco Bell's bean and cheese burritos with extra green sauce and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fergie/i-m-famous-for-splurging-at-fast-food-places-i-m-currently-obsessed/)

[Fergie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fergie/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/afe/fergie-3363_beans_i-m-famous-for-splurging-at-fast-food-pl_2028356.png)

> [I'll be the first one to tell you that I'm fat out of season. I love McDonald's, and I love Taco Bell.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johny-hendricks/i-ll-be-the-first-one-to-tell-you-that-i-m-fat-out-of-season-i-love/)

[Johny Hendricks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johny-hendricks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1ba/johny-hendricks-5171_fat_i-ll-be-the-first-one-to-tell-you-that-i_821767.jpg)

> [If you take relationship advice from Taco Bell hot sauce packets...Congratulations, you have reached rock bottom.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-take-relationship-advice-from-taco-bell-hot-sauce-packets/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49b/anonymous-1_funny_if-you-take-relationship-advice-from-tac_1830872.jpg)

> [I had Taco Bell last night. I got a Mexican pizza. On my way home, I was like, 'I've gotta go home…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashlee-simpson/i-had-taco-bell-last-night-i-got-a-mexican-pizza-on-my-way-home-i-was/)

[Ashlee Simpson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashlee-simpson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2d4/ashlee-simpson-12893_food_i-had-taco-bell-last-night-i-got-a-mexic_1181460.png)

> [The country of Mexico has just gotten its first Taco Bell. You're Welcome. Finally, Mexicans will have access to... Mexican food. Bon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-stewart/the-country-of-mexico-has-just-gotten-its-first-taco-bell-you-re/)

[Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-stewart/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d4/jon-stewart-455_access_the-country-of-mexico-has-just-gotten-it_893850.jpg)

> [That awkward moment when your in the drive-through and you ask for a Big Mac,then you realize your at Taco Bell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scar-simmons/that-awkward-moment-when-your-in-the-drive-through-and-you-ask-for-a/)

[Scar Simmons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scar-simmons/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41c/scar-simmons-107328_awkward_that-awkward-moment-when-your-in-the-dri_108783.jpg)

> [I have a rule: I want the pilot flying me up in the air at 30,000 feet to make more than a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-moore/i-have-a-rule-i-want-the-pilot-flying-me-up-in-the-air-at-30-000-feet/)

[Michael Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-moore/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ef5/michael-moore-884_air_i-have-a-rule-i-want-the-pilot-flying-me_2882407.png)

> [“I think anyone who stops at a gas station at night is up to no good. I think that if cops want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-konigsberg/i-think-anyone-who-stops-at-a-gas-station-at-night-is-up-to-no-good-i/)

[Bill Konigsberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-konigsberg/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/357/bill-konigsberg-14554_drunk-driving_i-think-anyone-who-stops-at-a-gas-statio_1340543.jpg)

> [ \[On Los Angeles:\] This city is a hundred years old but try and find some trace of its history. Every culture is… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-finger/on-los-angeles-this-city-is-a-hundred-years-old-but-try-and-find-some/)

[Anne Finger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-finger/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a8d/anne-finger-77054_bells_on-los-angeles-this-city-is-a-hundred-ye_3203180.jpg)

> [Seems Google management figured out it is cheaper, happier and more productive to take care of their employees and create a positive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-mcnally/seems-google-management-figured-out-it-is-cheaper-happier-and-more/)

[Joe McNally](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-mcnally/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9c7/joe-mcnally-20875_bells_seems-google-management-figured-out-it-i_2461614.jpg)

> [When I decided to be a musician I reckoned that that was going to be the way of less profit, less money.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-petty/when-i-decided-to-be-a-musician-i-reckoned-that-that-was-going-to-be/)

[Tom Petty](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-petty/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a29/tom-petty-2030_bells_when-i-decided-to-be-a-musician-i-reckon_441208.jpg)

> [Sometimes, I wish the garage days were here again. I used to love that, when you're eating Taco Bell and tuna fish…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-harwell/sometimes-i-wish-the-garage-days-were-here-again-i-used-to-love-that/)

[Steve Harwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-harwell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/825/steve-harwell-6898_fish_sometimes-i-wish-the-garage-days-were-he_1583773.jpg)

> [It's - I can't imagine a world - the idea that every day Sarah Huckabee Sanders briefs, Donald Trump stops what he's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-pfeiffer/it-s-i-can-t-imagine-a-world-the-idea-that-every-day-sarah-huckabee/)

[Daniel Pfeiffer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-pfeiffer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a14/daniel-pfeiffer-21700_day_it-s-i-can-t-imagine-a-world-the-idea-th_1603847.jpg)

> [I go to the fanciest restaurants in the world and try them out. I like to see these chefs that are wizards…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-jefferies/i-go-to-the-fanciest-restaurants-in-the-world-and-try-them-out-i-like/)

[Jim Jefferies](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-jefferies/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a44/jim-jefferies-8092_cheap_i-go-to-the-fanciest-restaurants-in-the_1539885.jpg)

> [I was going to McDonald's and Taco Bell every day. The kids behind the counter knew me - it wouldn't even faze…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eminem/i-was-going-to-mcdonald-s-and-taco-bell-every-day-the-kids-behind-the/)

[Eminem](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eminem/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0cf/eminem-415_behind_i-was-going-to-mcdonald-s-and-taco-bell_340408.jpg)

> [“Pulling to a stop in front of Aly’s house, I take a deep breath. With a flick of my wrist, I cut…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-harris/pulling-to-a-stop-in-front-of-aly-s-house-i-take-a-deep-breath-with-a/)

[Rachel Harris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-harris/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/994/rachel-harris-14251_american-flag_pulling-to-a-stop-in-front-of-aly-s-hous_1587237.jpg)

> [“Instructions for a Broken Heart I will find a bare patch of earth, somewhere where the ruins have fallen away, somewhere where…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kim-culbertson/instructions-for-a-broken-heart-i-will-find-a-bare-patch-of-earth/)

[Kim Culbertson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kim-culbertson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e6/kim-culbertson-39658_bare-skin_instructions-for-a-broken-heart-i-will-f_1763280.jpg)

> [Tyler J. Kuhn, 19 of Greenville, Ohio passed away on Tuesday October 2, 2012 at 7:16 AM. He was born April 22,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/tyler-j-kuhn-19-of-greenville-ohio-passed-away-on-tuesday-october-2/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d85/anonymous-1_high-school_tyler-j-kuhn-19-of-greenville-ohio-passe_2520953.jpg)

> [“There were moments - when Jeopardy came on, in the car during radio trivia challenges, or for practically any question I couldn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/there-were-moments-when-jeopardy-came-on-in-the-car-during-radio/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/sarah-dessen-110_taco-bell_there-were-moments-when-jeopardy-came-on_1996990.jpg)

> [“EARNINGS McDonald's Plans Marketing Push as Profit Slides By Julie Jargon \| 436 words Associated Press The burger giant has been struggling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/earnings-mcdonald-s-plans-marketing-push-as-profit-slides-by-julie/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e8/anonymous-1_around-the-world_earnings-mcdonald-s-plans-marketing-push_1855195.jpg)

> [“Once Kimmy and Bobby walked in Taco Bell they saw their two friends already sitting at the table, and Kimmy and Bobby…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lynette-mather/once-kimmy-and-bobby-walked-in-taco-bell-they-saw-their-two-friends/)

[Lynette Mather](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lynette-mather/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0f2/lynette-mather-64039_best-friend_once-kimmy-and-bobby-walked-in-taco-bell_2018434.jpg)

> [“YO MAMA SO STUPID... Yo mama so stupid she tried to put her M&Ms in alphabetical order. Yo mama so stupid she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jess-franken/yo-mama-so-stupid-yo-mama-so-stupid-she-tried-to-put-her-m-ms-in/)

[Jess Franken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jess-franken/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4b3/jess-franken-62530_blow-job_yo-mama-so-stupid-yo-mama-so-stupid-she_2842721.jpg)

> [“Sometimes grace is having the strength to persevere through the storm. Sometimes it's having the guts to rebuild, to take a chance,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cathleen-falsani/sometimes-grace-is-having-the-strength-to-persevere-through-the-storm/)

[Cathleen Falsani](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cathleen-falsani/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fdc/cathleen-falsani-20278_grace_sometimes-grace-is-having-the-strength-t_277618.jpg)

> [I'm celebrating Cinco de Mayo by puking tequila and gorditas on the side of a Taco Bell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-m-celebrating-cinco-de-mayo-by-puking-tequila-and-gorditas-on-the/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c48/anonymous-1_cinco-de-mayo_i-m-celebrating-cinco-de-mayo-by-puking_3163632.jpg)

> [I can't go to taco bell! I'm on an all carb diet! God karen why do you have to be so stupid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/regina/i-can-t-go-to-taco-bell-i-m-on-an-all-carb-diet-god-karen-why-do-you/)

[Regina](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/regina/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d57/regina-37588_taco-bell_i-can-t-go-to-taco-bell-i-m-on-an-all-ca_1198913.jpg)

> [You don't need to go to church to be a Christian. If you go to Taco Bell, that doesn't make you a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/justin-bieber/you-don-t-need-to-go-to-church-to-be-a-christian-if-you-go-to-taco/)

[Justin Bieber](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/justin-bieber/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a5/justin-bieber-551_bell_you-don-t-need-to-go-to-church-to-be-a-c_2611631.jpg)

> [“This death has been sponsored by Pringles, Taco Bell, Toyota, Trojan Condoms, and one evil, fucking genius.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephanie-jackson/this-death-has-been-sponsored-by-pringles-taco-bell-toyota-trojan/)

[Stephanie Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephanie-jackson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a5b/stephanie-jackson-279548_death_this-death-has-been-sponsored-by-pringle_685805.jpg)

> [The milk of kindness flows through my body, I shall follow Jesus to the Taco Bell and give thanks.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aretha-franklin/the-milk-of-kindness-flows-through-my-body-i-shall-follow-jesus-to/)

[Aretha Franklin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aretha-franklin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaa/aretha-franklin-2719_bells_the-milk-of-kindness-flows-through-my-bo_2961533.jpg)

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                        "text": "Thanks a lot for mentioning taco bell, my long lost love of fake Mexican food.",
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                        "text": "So I got gas yesterday for $1.39! Too bad it was only from Taco Bell.",
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                        "text": "Eating Taco Bell is like sleeping with your ex. I feel horrible afterwards and I'm always drunk when I do it.",
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                        "text": "If I'd had to work at Taco Bell I'd have still been out at night trying to play music.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I have pizza or Taco Bell one day, I'll have home-cooked meals the next.  I try to listen to what my body craves.",
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                        "text": "I'm famous for splurging at fast-food places. I'm currently obsessed with Taco Bell's bean and cheese burritos with extra green sauce and extra cheese. Gluttony!",
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                        "text": "I'll be the first one to tell you that I'm fat out of season. I love McDonald's, and I love Taco Bell. But, whenever it comes fight time, I'm always ready.",
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                        "text": "If you take relationship advice from Taco Bell hot sauce packets...Congratulations, you have reached rock bottom.",
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                        "text": "I had Taco Bell last night. I got a Mexican pizza. On my way home, I was like, 'I've gotta go home from the theater, get Taco Bell and go to bed.",
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                        "text": "The country of Mexico has just gotten its first Taco Bell. You're Welcome. Finally, Mexicans will have access to... Mexican food. Bon appetit. I can't imagine how confused they will be when they get a taco.",
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                        "text": "I have a rule: I want the pilot flying me up in the air at 30,000 feet to make more than a guy working at Taco Bell.",
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                        "text": "“I think anyone who stops at a gas station at night is up to no good. I think that if cops want to stop drunk driving, they should hide out in the bushes at the Taco Bell drive-through. I think if you're a guy and you pull down your pants and the girl you're with starts texting, you have a small penis.”",
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                        "text": "[On Los Angeles:] This city is a hundred years old but try and find some trace of its history. Every culture is swallowed up and spat out as a franchise. Taco Bell. Benihana of Tokyo. Numero Uno Pizza. Pup 'N' Taco. Kentucky Fried Chicken. Fast food sushi. Teriyaki Bowl.",
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                            "name": "Anne Finger"
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                        "text": "Seems Google management figured out it is cheaper, happier and more productive to take care of their employees and create a positive work environment than to burn them to a crisp, make them afraid of the future, and send them off into the highways and byways of California in search of a Taco Bell for lunch.",
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                        "text": "When I decided to be a musician I reckoned that that was going to be the way of less profit, less money. I was sort of giving up the idea of making a lot of money. It was what I loved to do. I would have done it anyway. If I'd had to work at Taco Bell I'd have still been out at night trying to play music.",
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                            "caption": "“When I decided to be a musician I reckoned that that was going to be the way of less profit, less money. I…” — Tom Petty",
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                        "text": "Sometimes, I wish the garage days were here again. I used to love that, when you're eating Taco Bell and tuna fish seven days a week and you're struggling to pay rent, your cable's getting turned off and you're plugging extension cords into your neighbor's house to steal their cable and their power.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Steve Harwell"
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                            "caption": "“Sometimes, I wish the garage days were here again. I used to love that, when you're eating Taco Bell and…” — Steve Harwell",
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                        "text": "It's - I can't imagine a world - the idea that every day Sarah Huckabee Sanders briefs, Donald Trump stops what he's doing and turns on the TV and watches it while eating a Taco Bell or whatever he eats. And then she has to go into his office afterwards and get critiqued on it.",
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                            "name": "Daniel Pfeiffer"
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                        "text": "I go to the fanciest restaurants in the world and try them out. I like to see these chefs that are wizards do their thing. I like two types of food: cheap fast food - In-N-Out Burger, Taco Bell, stuff like that - or expensive food. Anything in between just bothers me.",
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                            "name": "Jim Jefferies"
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                            "caption": "“I go to the fanciest restaurants in the world and try them out. I like to see these chefs that are wizards…” — Jim Jefferies",
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                        "text": "I was going to McDonald's and Taco Bell every day. The kids behind the counter knew me - it wouldn't even faze them. Or I'd sit up at Denny's or Big Boy and just eat by myself. It was sad. I got so heavy that people started to not recognize me.",
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                            "name": "Eminem"
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                            "caption": "“I was going to McDonald's and Taco Bell every day. The kids behind the counter knew me - it wouldn't even…” — Eminem",
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                        "text": "“Pulling to a stop in front of Aly’s house, I take a deep breath. With a flick of my wrist, I cut the engine and listen to the silence. I’ve sat in this exact spot more times than I can count. In many ways, Aly’s house is like my sanctuary. A place I go when my own home feels like a graveyard. I glance up at the bedroom window of the girl who knows me better than anyone, the only person I let see me cry after Dad died. I won’t let this experiment take that or her away from me. Tonight, I’m going to prove that Aly and I can go back to our normal, easy friendship. Throwing open my door, I trudge up her sidewalk, plant my feet outside her front door, and ring the bell. “Coming!” I step back and see Aly stick her head out of her second-story window. “No problem,” I call back up. “Take your time.” More time to get my head on straight. Aly disappears behind a film of yellow curtain, and I turn to look out at the quiet neighborhood. Up and down the street, the lights blink on, filling the air with a low hum that matches the thrumming of my nerves. Across the street, old Mr. Lawson sits at his usual perch under a gigantic American flag, drinking beer and mumbling to himself. Two little girls ride their bikes around the cul-de-sac, smiling and waving. Just a normal, run-of-the-mill Friday night. Except not. I thrust my hands into my pockets, jiggling the loose change from my Taco Bell run earlier tonight, and grab my pack of Trident. I toss a stick into my mouth and chew furiously. Supposedly, the smell of peppermint can calm your nerves. I grab a second stick and shove it in, too. With the clacking sound of Aly’s shoes approaching the door behind me, I remind myself again about tonight’s mission. All I need is focus. I take another deep breath for good measure and rock back on my heels, ready to greet my best friend. She opens the door, wearing a black dress molded to her skin, and I let the air out in one big huff.”",
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                        "text": "“Instructions for a Broken Heart I will find a bare patch of earth, somewhere where the ruins have fallen away, somewhere where I can fit both hands, and I will dig a hole. And into that hole, I will scream you, I will dump all the shadow places of my heart—the times you didn’t call when you said you’d call, the way you only half listened to my poems, your eyes on people coming through the swinging door of the café—not on me—your ears, not really turned toward me. For all those times I started to tell you about the fight with my dad or when my grandma died, and you said something about your car, something about the math test you flunked, as an answer. I will scream into that hole the silence of dark nights after you’d kissed me, how when I asked if something was wrong—and something was obviously so very wrong—how you said “nothing,” how you didn’t tell me until I had to see it in the dim light of a costume barn—so much wrong. I will scream all of it. Then I will fill it in with dark earth, leave it here in Italy, so there will be an ocean between the hole and me. Because then I can bring home a heart full of the light patches. A heart that sees the sunset you saw that night outside of Taco Bell, the way you pointed out that it made the trees seem on fire, a heart that holds the time your little brother fell on his bike at the fairgrounds and you had pockets full of bright colored Band-Aids and you kissed the bare skin of his knees. I will take that home with me. In my heart. I will take home your final Hamlet monologue on the dark stage when you cried closing night and it wasn’t really acting, you cried because you felt the words in you and on that bare stage you felt the way I feel every day of my life, every second, the way the words, the light and dark, the spotlight in your face, made you Hamlet for that brief hiccup of a moment, made you a poet, an artist at your core. I get to take Italy home with me, the Italy that showed me you and the Italy that showed me—me—the Italy that wrote me my very own instructions for a broken heart. And I get to leave the other heart in a hole. We are over. I know this. But we are not blank. We were a beautiful building made of stone, crumbled now and covered in vines. But not blank. Not forgotten. We are a history. We are beauty out of ruins.”",
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                        "text": "Tyler J. Kuhn, 19 of Greenville, Ohio passed away on Tuesday October 2, 2012 at 7:16 AM. He was born April 22, 1993 in Dayton, Ohio, the son of Tim & Barb (Bauman) Kuhn of Greenville, Ohio. He was a graduate of Greenville High School where he was in the engineering program and played baseball, he was studying Aviation Engineering at Sinclair Community College, he worked at Taco Bell. He was a member of First Presbyterian Church, Greenville where he was active in the youth group. He is survived by his parents; brother: Tony Kuhn & Amanda Mcdorman of Greenville; sister: Brittany Kuhn of Greenville",
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                            "caption": "“Tyler J. Kuhn, 19 of Greenville, Ohio passed away on Tuesday October 2, 2012 at 7:16 AM. He was born April…” — Anonymous",
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                        "text": "“There were moments - when Jeopardy came on, in the car during radio trivia challenges, or for practically any question I couldn't answer in any subject - that Rogerson simply amazed me. I started to seek out facts, just to stump him, but it never worked. He was that sharp. \"In physics,\" I sprung on him as we sat in the Taco Bell drive-through, \"what does the capital letter W stand for?\" \"Energy,\" he said, handing me my burrito. Sitting in front of my parents' house as he kissed me goodnight: \"Which two planets are almost identical in size?\" \"Duh,\" he said, smoothing my hair back, \"Venus and Earth.\" \"Rogerson,\" I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, \"where would I find the pelagic zone?\" \"In the open sea,\" he said. \"Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints.”",
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                        "text": "“EARNINGS McDonald's Plans Marketing Push as Profit Slides By Julie Jargon | 436 words Associated Press The burger giant has been struggling to maintain relevance among younger consumers and fill orders quickly in kitchens that have grown overwhelmed with menu items. McDonald's Corp. plans a marketing push to emphasize its fresh-cooked breakfasts as it battles growing competition for the morning meal. Competition at breakfast has heated up recently as Yum Brands Inc.'s Taco Bell entered the business with its new Waffle Taco last month and other rivals have added or discounted breakfast items. McDonald's Chief Executive Don Thompson said it hasn't yet noticed an impact from Taco Bell's breakfast debut, but that the overall increased competition \"forces us to focus even more on being aggressive in breakfast.\" Mr. Thompson's comments came after McDonald's on Tuesday reported that its profit for the first three months of 2014 dropped 5.2% from a year earlier, weaker than analysts' expectations. Comparable sales at U.S. restaurants open more than a year declined 1.7% for the quarter and 0.6% for March, the fifth straight month of declines in the company's biggest market. Global same-store sales rose 0.5% for both the quarter and month. Mr. Thompson acknowledged again that the company has lost relevance with some customers and needs to strengthen its menu offerings. He emphasized Tuesday that McDonald's is focused on stabilizing key markets, including the U.S., Germany, Australia and Japan. The CEO said McDonald's has dominated the fast-food breakfast business for 35 years, and \"we don't plan on giving that up.\" The company plans in upcoming ads to inform customers that it cooks its breakfast, unlike some rivals. \"We crack fresh eggs, grill sausage and bacon,\" Mr. Thompson said. \"This is not a microwave deal.\" Beyond breakfast, McDonald's also plans to boost marketing of core menu items such as Big Macs and french fries, since those core products make up 40% of total sales. To serve customers more quickly, the chain is working to optimize staffing, and is adding new prep tables that let workers more efficiently add new toppings when guests want to customize orders. McDonald's also said it aims to sell more company-owned restaurants outside the U.S. to franchisees. Currently, 81% of its restaurants around the world are franchised. Collecting royalties from franchisees provides a stable source of income for a restaurant company and removes the cost of operating them. McDonald's reported a first-quarter profit of $1.2 billion, or $1.21 a share, down from $1.27 billion, or $1.26 a share, a year earlier. The company partly attributed the decline to the effect of income-tax benefits in the prior year. Total revenue for the quarter edged up 1.4% to $6.7 billion, though costs rose faster, at 2.3%. Analysts polled by Thomson Reuters forecast earnings of $1.24 a share on revenue of $6.72 billion.”",
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                        "text": "“Once Kimmy and Bobby walked in Taco Bell they saw their two friends already sitting at the table, and Kimmy and Bobby ordered their food before they joined them. “What’s up?” Manning asked. “Not much, just hanging out,” Bobby answered. “And of course the two of you are always hanging out,” Dave said, nodding toward Kimmy. Kimmy smiled. “Of course we are always hanging out. That’s what you do when you’ve got a best friend, Dave. You’ll learn that maybe one day when you have a best friend.”",
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                        "text": "“YO MAMA SO STUPID... Yo mama so stupid she tried to put her M&Ms in alphabetical order. Yo mama so stupid she told me to meet her at the corner of \"WALK\" and \"DON'T WALK.\" Yo mama so stupid she went to the dentist to get a blue tooth. Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a mattress store and slept on the floor. Yo mama so stupid she failed a survey. Yo mama so stupid she got fired from a blow job. Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company. Yo mama so stupid she tried to climb Mountain Dew. Yo mama so stupid she went to the YMCA thinking it's Macy's. Yo mama is so stupid, she won't play Candy Crush cause she has diabetes.”",
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                        "text": "“Sometimes grace is having the strength to persevere through the storm. Sometimes it's having the guts to rebuild, to take a chance, to follow your nose and your heart rather than your head. Sometimes grace is finding out that your preconceived notions are dead wrong. Sometimes it's being surprised by joy. Sometimes grace is something you can feel even if you can't see it. And sometimes it's a bowl of watermelon gazpacho when you were expecting Taco Bell.”",
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                        "text": "I'm celebrating Cinco de Mayo by puking tequila and gorditas on the side of a Taco Bell.",
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                        "text": "I can't go to taco bell! I'm on an all carb diet! God karen why do you have to be so stupid",
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                        "text": "You don't need to go to church to be a Christian. If you go to Taco Bell, that doesn't make you a taco.",
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                        "text": "“This death has been sponsored by Pringles, Taco Bell, Toyota, Trojan Condoms, and one evil, fucking genius.”",
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                        "text": "The milk of kindness flows through my body, I shall follow Jesus to the Taco Bell and give thanks.",
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