--- title: "19 Should Quotes By Lewis Black" description: "19 Should quotes by Lewis Black. Plus more from Lewis Black and more Should sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png" --- > [There should be a law that you can't shut down the government - that you don't have that power.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shut-down-the-government-that/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png) > [It's amazing what I could've written in my life if I had realized that I should keep writing and not masturbating.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in-my-life-if-i-had-realized/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/652/lewis-black-1143_ifs_it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in_1088534.png) > [Should I eat this or should I eat this? Well, I'll have to eat both!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-well-i-ll-have-to-eat-both/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf3/lewis-black-1143_inspirational_should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-w_2466691.png) > [If the people of New Zealand want to be part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-the-people-of-new-zealand-want-to-be-part-of-our-world-i-believe/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d2f/lewis-black-1143_australia_if-the-people-of-new-zealand-want-to-be_1736378.png) > [When people come to my act any time after Thanksgiving, I usually say, You shouldn't be here. You should be shopping. Our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-after-thanksgiving-i-usually-say/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/845/lewis-black-1143_buying_when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-afte_2681776.png) > ["Equestrian", by the by, is the gayest word in the English language. In fact, I thought Brokeback Mountain should have been called…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word-in-the-english-language-in/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df2/lewis-black-1143_brokeback-mountain_equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word_1342609.png) > [I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to feed people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have-the-ability-to-explain-to/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ad0/lewis-black-1143_ability_i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have_2690229.png) > [I don't buy the 'at 60 it's great to have kids' thing. I don't buy the line that has been thrown down…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have-kids-thing-i-don-t-buy-the/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e19/lewis-black-1143_kids_i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have_3113932.png) > [The thing is, whenever I see Hillary Clinton, I feel like I have to vote for her. She makes me feel guilty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clinton-i-feel-like-i-have-to/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18c/lewis-black-1143_bad-marriage_the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clin_2579486.png) > [See... What I felt they should have done, for our first public works project, is build a giant wall... across the entire…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-for-our-first-public-works/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1f/lewis-black-1143_air_see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-fo_2242798.png) > [If you don't drink 56 bottles of water a week, scientists say you should take a garden hose at the end of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a-week-scientists-say-you/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e3/lewis-black-1143_ass_if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a_2305411.png) > [I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time-for-the-people-and-that-no/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time_1088979.jpg) > [I believe that every paper in the country should have one headline that when you read it, you laugh so hard you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-country-should-have-one-headline/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b0d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-countr_1213696.png) > [If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirror-and-watching-your-muscles/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/lewis-black-1143_believe_if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirr_1810578.jpg) > [I never thought that Bill Clinton should be the president. When he was running to be the president of the United States,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should-be-the-president-when-he-was/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/lewis-black-1143_accomplishment_i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should_322201.jpg) > [I knew that I'd lived in New York too long when, a few years ago, I was on a subway going downtown,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-long-when-a-few-years-ago-i-was/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3d/lewis-black-1143_boards_i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-lo_165926.png) > [Here's why I think there's something a little odd with George Bush. Because a lot of the times when he speaks, his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-little-odd-with-george-bush/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d8/lewis-black-1143_bars_here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-l_2467933.png) > [Is a BJ adultery? What? Did I miss a day of school? Of course it is! Oral sex is adultery like Curling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-of-school-of-course-it-is-oral/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/063/lewis-black-1143_adultery_is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-o_758977.png) > [Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should be focused on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way-we-can-help-the-most-people/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c46/lewis-black-1143_country_democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way_2676769.png) ## Other authors on Should ## More by Lewis Black > [I think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes your mind…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-think-one-reason-people-play-golf-is-it-allows-them-to-obsess-about/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [If you're going to vote for somebody because you think they have a great faith in God, you'd better be sure that God has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-re-going-to-vote-for-somebody-because-you-think-they-have-a/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [I think that I don't panic as much as the folks on the left or the right do. I don't have that sense of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-think-that-i-don-t-panic-as-much-as-the-folks-on-the-left-or-the/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [“I don't know if you've noticed, but our two-party system is a bowl of shit looking at itself in the mirror.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-noticed-but-our-two-party-system-is-a-bowl-of/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [These ballot initiatives against same sex marriage remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/these-ballot-initiatives-against-same-sex-marriage-remind-us-that/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [If you're going to pick a book and you want to base a system of government around it, why not 'Harry Potter?'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-re-going-to-pick-a-book-and-you-want-to-base-a-system-of/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [No matter what, your parents are going to worry about you. I had a tour bus, and my mother still thought I was broke.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/no-matter-what-your-parents-are-going-to-worry-about-you-i-had-a-tour/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [I'm always amazed when I hear people saying, "That George Bush, he's a great leader". And I wonder, where can one find a drug…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-m-always-amazed-when-i-hear-people-saying-that-george-bush-he-s-a/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [I knew that I'd lived in New York too long when, a few years ago, I was on a subway going downtown, and it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-long-when-a-few-years-ago-i-was/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [If you're seeing a psychiatrist, you're wasting money because all you've got to do is get on a plane, get on a subway tomorrow…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-re-seeing-a-psychiatrist-you-re-wasting-money-because-all-you/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [Well first of all, I'd just like to say that 2005 was a great year, if you like swimming through crap.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/well-first-of-all-i-d-just-like-to-say-that-2005-was-a-great-year-if/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [I'd like the campaigning to be about all the things they're not going to do. Just tell me what you're not going do! Don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-d-like-the-campaigning-to-be-about-all-the-things-they-re-not-going/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [All food is comfort food. Maybe I just like to chew.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/all-food-is-comfort-food-maybe-i-just-like-to-chew/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [Johnny Vassilaros is the man who has created the finest cup of coffee ever served in the city of New York.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/johnny-vassilaros-is-the-man-who-has-created-the-finest-cup-of-coffee/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) > [“At seven p.m., hope is sparked again when some new chirpy airline employee announces that a new plane without that nasty mechanical problem -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/at-seven-p-m-hope-is-sparked-again-when-some-new-chirpy-airline/) [Lewis Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-black/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/should/lewis-black/#itemlist", "name": "19 Should Quotes By Lewis Black", "numberOfItems": 19, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "There should be a law that you can't shut down the government - that you don't have that power.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shut-down-the-government-that/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There should be a law that you can't shut down the government - that you don't have that power.” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "It's amazing what I could've written in my life if I had realized that I should keep writing and not masturbating.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in-my-life-if-i-had-realized/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/652/lewis-black-1143_ifs_it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in_1088534.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/652/lewis-black-1143_ifs_it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in_1088534.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/652/lewis-black-1143_ifs_it-s-amazing-what-i-could-ve-written-in_1088534.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“It's amazing what I could've written in my life if I had realized that I should keep writing and not…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Should I eat this or should I eat this? Well, I'll have to eat both!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-well-i-ll-have-to-eat-both/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf3/lewis-black-1143_inspirational_should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-w_2466691.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf3/lewis-black-1143_inspirational_should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-w_2466691.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf3/lewis-black-1143_inspirational_should-i-eat-this-or-should-i-eat-this-w_2466691.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Should I eat this or should I eat this? 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You should be shopping. Our economy depends on you! You should be out there buying stuff.'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-after-thanksgiving-i-usually-say/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/845/lewis-black-1143_buying_when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-afte_2681776.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/845/lewis-black-1143_buying_when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-afte_2681776.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/845/lewis-black-1143_buying_when-people-come-to-my-act-any-time-afte_2681776.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When people come to my act any time after Thanksgiving, I usually say, You shouldn't be here. 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In fact, I thought Brokeback Mountain should have been called Two Equestrians.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word-in-the-english-language-in/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df2/lewis-black-1143_brokeback-mountain_equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word_1342609.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df2/lewis-black-1143_brokeback-mountain_equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word_1342609.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df2/lewis-black-1143_brokeback-mountain_equestrian-by-the-by-is-the-gayest-word_1342609.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“\"Equestrian\", by the by, is the gayest word in the English language. In fact, I thought Brokeback Mountain…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to feed people in this country, and that is not socialism.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have-the-ability-to-explain-to/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ad0/lewis-black-1143_ability_i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have_2690229.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ad0/lewis-black-1143_ability_i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have_2690229.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ad0/lewis-black-1143_ability_i-am-angry-that-the-democrats-don-t-have_2690229.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I don't buy the 'at 60 it's great to have kids' thing. I don't buy the line that has been thrown down - 'You can have a kid at any time.' That doesn't mean you should.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have-kids-thing-i-don-t-buy-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e19/lewis-black-1143_kids_i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have_3113932.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e19/lewis-black-1143_kids_i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have_3113932.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e19/lewis-black-1143_kids_i-don-t-buy-the-at-60-it-s-great-to-have_3113932.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I don't buy the 'at 60 it's great to have kids' thing. I don't buy the line that has been thrown down - 'You…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The thing is, whenever I see Hillary Clinton, I feel like I have to vote for her. She makes me feel guilty because I feel like I should vote for her so that she'll feel better about herself because she'd been in such a bad marriage.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clinton-i-feel-like-i-have-to/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18c/lewis-black-1143_bad-marriage_the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clin_2579486.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18c/lewis-black-1143_bad-marriage_the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clin_2579486.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/18c/lewis-black-1143_bad-marriage_the-thing-is-whenever-i-see-hillary-clin_2579486.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The thing is, whenever I see Hillary Clinton, I feel like I have to vote for her. She makes me feel guilty…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "See... What I felt they should have done, for our first public works project, is build a giant wall... across the entire border of Canada. Because that's where the cold air comes from.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-for-our-first-public-works/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1f/lewis-black-1143_air_see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-fo_2242798.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1f/lewis-black-1143_air_see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-fo_2242798.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1f/lewis-black-1143_air_see-what-i-felt-they-should-have-done-fo_2242798.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“See... What I felt they should have done, for our first public works project, is build a giant wall…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you don't drink 56 bottles of water a week, scientists say you should take a garden hose at the end of the week and shove it up your ass.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a-week-scientists-say-you/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e3/lewis-black-1143_ass_if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a_2305411.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e3/lewis-black-1143_ass_if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a_2305411.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e3/lewis-black-1143_ass_if-you-don-t-drink-56-bottles-of-water-a_2305411.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you don't drink 56 bottles of water a week, scientists say you should take a garden hose at the end of…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak to us during the summer. They can start talking again after Labor Day.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time-for-the-people-and-that-no/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time_1088979.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time_1088979.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-summer-is-our-time-a-time_1088979.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I believe that every paper in the country should have one headline that when you read it, you laugh so hard you can't stand it. It has to be that way. What about a headline like this: 'Hippo Eats Dwarf'? How good is that? You read that headline, and you immediately close the paper and say, 'Wow, it's gonna be a great day.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-country-should-have-one-headline/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b0d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-countr_1213696.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b0d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-countr_1213696.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b0d/lewis-black-1143_believe_i-believe-that-every-paper-in-the-countr_1213696.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I believe that every paper in the country should have one headline that when you read it, you laugh so hard…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it is now eating itself. That's why I believe there should be a psychiatrist at every health club, so that when they see you doing this, they will take you away for a little chat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirror-and-watching-your-muscles/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/lewis-black-1143_believe_if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirr_1810578.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/lewis-black-1143_believe_if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirr_1810578.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/lewis-black-1143_believe_if-you-re-working-out-in-front-of-a-mirr_1810578.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I never thought that Bill Clinton should be the president. When he was running to be the president of the United States, he said on over a hundred occasions, he said the following: He said, 'One of the great accomplishments while I was the governor of Arkansas, was to take my state in education from 50th to 49th.' And I thought, ' you know, Bill, you should keep that a secret.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should-be-the-president-when-he-was/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/lewis-black-1143_accomplishment_i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should_322201.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/lewis-black-1143_accomplishment_i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should_322201.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/lewis-black-1143_accomplishment_i-never-thought-that-bill-clinton-should_322201.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I never thought that Bill Clinton should be the president. When he was running to be the president of the…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I knew that I'd lived in New York too long when, a few years ago, I was on a subway going downtown, and it stopped at 14th Street. At the station, the doors opened, and the conductor announced that there was a bomb on board and we should evacuate immediately. Nobody moved. We just looked at each other, 'Do you see a bomb?' 'I don't see a bomb.' 'There's no bomb.' 'I've only got two stops - let's go for it.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-long-when-a-few-years-ago-i-was/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3d/lewis-black-1143_boards_i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-lo_165926.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3d/lewis-black-1143_boards_i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-lo_165926.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3d/lewis-black-1143_boards_i-knew-that-i-d-lived-in-new-york-too-lo_165926.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I knew that I'd lived in New York too long when, a few years ago, I was on a subway going downtown, and it…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Here's why I think there's something a little odd with George Bush. Because a lot of the times when he speaks, his words don't match his face. Something is askew. You can't talk about the war with a smile on your face. He does it constantly. If you're the President, you should go We're going to talk about the war, I must have a frowny face. The only time you can smile when you're talking about the war in Iraq is when you go, Well, two Iraqis walk into a bar, hahaha.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-little-odd-with-george-bush/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d8/lewis-black-1143_bars_here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-l_2467933.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d8/lewis-black-1143_bars_here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-l_2467933.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d8/lewis-black-1143_bars_here-s-why-i-think-there-s-something-a-l_2467933.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Here's why I think there's something a little odd with George Bush. Because a lot of the times when he…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Is a BJ adultery? What? Did I miss a day of school? Of course it is! Oral sex is adultery like Curling is an Olympic sport. The only thing is, oral sex should be in the Olympics because it's much harder than Curling, and if you're good at it, you DESERVE a medal!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-of-school-of-course-it-is-oral/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/063/lewis-black-1143_adultery_is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-o_758977.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/063/lewis-black-1143_adultery_is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-o_758977.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/063/lewis-black-1143_adultery_is-a-bj-adultery-what-did-i-miss-a-day-o_758977.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Is a BJ adultery? What? Did I miss a day of school? Of course it is! Oral sex is adultery like Curling is an…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should be focused on how to do that in the most fiscally responsible manner possible.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Lewis Black" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-black/democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way-we-can-help-the-most-people/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c46/lewis-black-1143_country_democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way_2676769.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c46/lewis-black-1143_country_democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way_2676769.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c46/lewis-black-1143_country_democrats-should-be-focused-on-which-way_2676769.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should…” — Lewis Black", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/should/lewis-black/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/should/lewis-black/", "name": "Should Quotes by Lewis Black", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/should/lewis-black/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d18/lewis-black-1143_down_there-should-be-a-law-that-you-can-t-shu_1844656.png" }, "description": "19 Should quotes by Lewis Black. 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