---
title: "Best Sarcasm Sayings"
description: "Browse 1,265 Sarcasm quotes by 760 authors. Discover the best Sarcasm sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/533/brittany-murphy-8811_sarcasm_i-do-sarcasm-really-poorly-1485780_1485780.jpg"
---

> [I do sarcasm really poorly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brittany-murphy/i-do-sarcasm-really-poorly/)

[Brittany Murphy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brittany-murphy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/533/brittany-murphy-8811_sarcasm_i-do-sarcasm-really-poorly-1485780_1485780.jpg)

> [Sarcasm is lost in print.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jon-cryer/sarcasm-is-lost-in-print/)

[Jon Cryer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jon-cryer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b0f/jon-cryer-14188_lost_sarcasm-is-lost-in-print-2774030_2774030.jpg)

> [I like being sarcastic.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janethnipay/i-like-being-sarcastic/)

Janethnipay

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fe8/janethnipay-9448_being-real_i-like-being-sarcastic-2787314_2787314.jpg)

> [“Go make love to a tube sock.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nenia-campbell/go-make-love-to-a-tube-sock/)

[Nenia Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nenia-campbell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64d/nenia-campbell-1294_fuck-you_go-make-love-to-a-tube-sock-367542_367542.jpg)

> [Comedy comes with a bit of sarcasm, wit and edginess.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kiku-sharda/comedy-comes-with-a-bit-of-sarcasm-wit-and-edginess/)

[Kiku Sharda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kiku-sharda/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f8a/kiku-sharda-6117_bit_comedy-comes-with-a-bit-of-sarcasm-wit-a_554418.jpg)

> [Yeah..no, I don't really think I care.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/yeah-no-i-don-t-really-think-i-care/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7fd/anonymous-1_caring_yeah-no-i-don-t-really-think-i-care-1805_1805841.jpg)

> [This music won't do. There's not enough sarcasm in it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-goldwyn/this-music-won-t-do-there-s-not-enough-sarcasm-in-it/)

[Samuel Goldwyn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-goldwyn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a0/samuel-goldwyn-3156_enough_this-music-won-t-do-there-s-not-enough-s_1653273.jpg)

> [SARCASM the body's natural defense against stupidity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/sarcasm-the-body-s-natural-defense-against-stupidity/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ab7/anonymous-1_defense_sarcasm-the-body-s-natural-defense-again_216797.jpg)

> [New STD called Feelings.. don't catch em](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/syoung/new-std-called-feelings-don-t-catch-em/)

Syoung

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/941/syoung-8345_being-hurt-by-someon_new-std-called-feelings-don-t-catch-em-5_504115.jpg)

> [You're so fake, Barbie is jealous.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-re-so-fake-barbie-is-jealous/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99c/anonymous-1_being-fake_you-re-so-fake-barbie-is-jealous-608232_608232.jpg)

> [If you have nothing nice to say, shut up](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-faustina/if-you-have-nothing-nice-to-say-shut-up/)

Claire Faustina

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/37f/claire-faustina-228488_fuck-off_if-you-have-nothing-nice-to-say-shut-up_2875156.jpg)

> [If someone called you: STUPID. Say: Compared to you, I'm Genius!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-someone-called-you-stupid-say-compared-to-you-i-m-genius/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c03/anonymous-1_intelligence_if-someone-called-you-stupid-say-compare_2071996.jpg)

> [She: How do u feel about women's rights? Me: Idk.. I like either side..](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/soul/she-how-do-u-feel-about-women-s-rights-me-idk-i-like-either-side/)

[SouL](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/soul/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/081/soul-54484_clever-facebook-stat_she-how-do-u-feel-about-women-s-rights-m_2681314.jpg)

> [Being sarcastic to dumb people because they can't tell if your being honest.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-sarcastic-to-dumb-people-because-they-can-t-tell-if-your-being/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/875/anonymous-1_dumb-people_being-sarcastic-to-dumb-people-because-t_489944.jpg)

> [\*Saturday Nights\* Me: Online, eating, watching tv. Everyone else: Partying, getting high & drunk.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/saturday-nights-me-online-eating-watching-tv-everyone-else-partying/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7e2/anonymous-1_drunk_saturday-nights-me-online-eating-watchin_670884.jpg)

> [She: Can I have breakfast in bed? Me: If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wandini/she-can-i-have-breakfast-in-bed-me-if-you-want-breakfast-in-bed-sleep/)

[Wandini](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wandini/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ae/wandini-13279_breakfast_she-can-i-have-breakfast-in-bed-me-if-yo_244305.jpg)

> [You know, sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.' 'And yet it is still extremely funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cecelia-ahern/you-know-sarcasm-is-the-lowest-form-of-wit-and-yet-it-is-still/)

[Cecelia Ahern](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cecelia-ahern/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e6/cecelia-ahern-535_extremely-funny_you-know-sarcasm-is-the-lowest-form-of-w_3176015.jpg)

> [Treat me like a joke, & I will leave you like it's funny !!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amber/treat-me-like-a-joke-i-will-leave-you-like-it-s-funny/)

[Amber](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amber/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/687/amber-19209_being-real_treat-me-like-a-joke-i-will-leave-you-li_3087020.jpg)

> [“Cut the sarcasm. It makes you sound like an even bigger asshole”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-banks/cut-the-sarcasm-it-makes-you-sound-like-an-even-bigger-asshole/)

[Maya Banks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-banks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e3/maya-banks-617_asshole_cut-the-sarcasm-it-makes-you-sound-like_3224524.jpg)

> [Being nice to people you don't like isn't called being two-faced ; it's called Growing up . You should try it sometime..](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-nice-to-people-you-don-t-like-isn-t-called-being-two-faced-it-s/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c03/anonymous-1_sarcasm_being-nice-to-people-you-don-t-like-isn_1808375.jpg)

> [So, I bought a new CD and I was trying to get it open but couldn't with all the layers... I mean…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-degeneres/so-i-bought-a-new-cd-and-i-was-trying-to-get-it-open-but-couldn-t-2/)

[Ellen DeGeneres](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-degeneres/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/46a/ellen-degeneres-604_cds_so-i-bought-a-new-cd-and-i-was-trying-to_2117978.jpg)

> [“Gotta have my make up, in case I run into Joey and he wants to beat the shit out of me. Gotta…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-carlin/gotta-have-my-make-up-in-case-i-run-into-joey-and-he-wants-to-beat/)

[George Carlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-carlin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30d/george-carlin-155_humor_gotta-have-my-make-up-in-case-i-run-into_185348.jpg)

> [I'd love to start some movements. What I'm tired of is irony, and sarcasm, and music/movies/what have you, not having the guts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/don-hertzfeldt/i-d-love-to-start-some-movements-what-i-m-tired-of-is-irony-and/)

[Don Hertzfeldt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/don-hertzfeldt/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ca3/don-hertzfeldt-16260_guts_i-d-love-to-start-some-movements-what-i_2669359.jpg)

> [“As could the sarcasm in her voice. "yes, she's bleeding to death Lu upstairs, but i thought I'd avoid telling you right…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/as-could-the-sarcasm-in-her-voice-yes-she-s-bleeding-to-death-lu/)

[Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a1d/cassandra-clare-9_city-of-fallen-angel_as-could-the-sarcasm-in-her-voice-yes-sh_24617.jpg)

> [“Don't waste yer' breath kid. Explainin' anything to that one? It's like tryin' ta' slap the dumb off a retard... -George Foster”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shawn-durnin/don-t-waste-yer-breath-kid-explainin-anything-to-that-one-it-s-like/)

Shawn Durnin

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a78/shawn-durnin-106816_humor_don-t-waste-yer-breath-kid-explainin-any_858555.jpg)

> [“You are quite possibly the least smooth guy I know,” she mumbled. “You can’t even put your arm around me without tripping…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lish-mcbride/you-are-quite-possibly-the-least-smooth-guy-i-know-she-mumbled-you/)

[Lish McBride](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lish-mcbride/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2f/lish-mcbride-10317_humor_you-are-quite-possibly-the-least-smooth_1009894.jpg)

> [“I'm pretty sure those're my balls you've found,” I said to the man searching my pants. “You gonna count 'em out now?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nenia-campbell/i-m-pretty-sure-those-re-my-balls-you-ve-found-i-said-to-the-man/)

[Nenia Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nenia-campbell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a73/nenia-campbell-1294_armed-and-dangerous_i-m-pretty-sure-those-re-my-balls-you-ve_458011.jpg)

> [“Dear Producers, Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will implode and the world will suffer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-eggers/dear-producers-something-is-radiating-deep-within-me-and-it-must-be/)

[Dave Eggers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-eggers/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23f/dave-eggers-638_art_dear-producers-something-is-radiating-de_2223961.png)

> [I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gordon-b-hinckley/i-am-suggesting-that-as-we-go-through-life-we-accentuate-the-positive/)

[Gordon B. Hinckley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gordon-b-hinckley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5eb/gordon-b-hinckley-331_accentuate_i-am-suggesting-that-as-we-go-through-li_2561150.png)

> [Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter? Yes, said Harry stiffly. Yes, sir. There's no need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jk-rowling/do-you-remember-me-telling-you-we-are-practicing-non-verbal-spells/)

[JK Rowling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jk-rowling/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/jk-rowling-15740_humor_do-you-remember-me-telling-you-we-are-pr_1146559.jpg)

> [And then what? Said, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Ms. Lane, I didn't mean to wrinkle your lovely blouse. May I press that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/and-then-what-said-oh-i-m-so-sorry-ms-lane-i-didn-t-mean-to-wrinkle/)

[Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c3e/karen-marie-moning-189_blouses_and-then-what-said-oh-i-m-so-sorry-ms-la_2895355.png)

> [“In 1803, President Jefferson oversaw the purchase of this land from the French for $15 million. It doesn't sound like much for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-gorman/in-1803-president-jefferson-oversaw-the-purchase-of-this-land-from/)

[Dave Gorman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-gorman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/00e/dave-gorman-40297_america_in-1803-president-jefferson-oversaw-the_991364.jpg)

> [You aren't worried are you?" "Why should I be worried? It's just another day in the neighborhood. You know - bombs, fires,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christine-feehan/you-aren-t-worried-are-you-why-should-i-be-worried-it-s-just-another/)

[Christine Feehan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christine-feehan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6fd/christine-feehan-615_another-day_you-aren-t-worried-are-you-why-should-i_1936026.png)

> [“His chief form of entertainment was reading. The last moments he was in a cabin were usually spent scanning bookshelves and nightstands.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-finkel/his-chief-form-of-entertainment-was-reading-the-last-moments-he-was/)

[Michael Finkel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-finkel/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dfb/michael-finkel-7714_body-language_his-chief-form-of-entertainment-was-read_1052046.jpg)

> [“She tapped out a beat on the edge of the piano as I tripped and plummeted through the refrain of “Spacebar,” trying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maggie-stiefvater/she-tapped-out-a-beat-on-the-edge-of-the-piano-as-i-tripped-and/)

[Maggie Stiefvater](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maggie-stiefvater/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/770/maggie-stiefvater-76_cole-st-clair_she-tapped-out-a-beat-on-the-edge-of-the_2658011.jpg)

> [You did what you did and that was that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-did-what-you-did-and-that-was-that/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d75/anonymous-1_facts_you-did-what-you-did-and-that-was-that-2_2820689.jpg)

> [“Counsel’s sarcasm is inappropriate.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcia-clark/counsel-s-sarcasm-is-inappropriate/)

[Marcia Clark](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcia-clark/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73f/marcia-clark-8027_counsel_counsel-s-sarcasm-is-inappropriate-46813_468136.jpg)

> [I feel like sarcasm is important in a relationship.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matt-lanter/i-feel-like-sarcasm-is-important-in-a-relationship/)

[Matt Lanter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matt-lanter/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fbf/matt-lanter-15475_feel_i-feel-like-sarcasm-is-important-in-a-re_1498895.png)

> [And by 'K...' I mean 'Fuck you.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/and-by-k-i-mean-fuck-you/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d6e/anonymous-1_annoying-people_and-by-k-i-mean-fuck-you-711609_711609.jpg)

> [Practice safe lunch. Use a condiment!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erica-jade-montoya/practice-safe-lunch-use-a-condiment/)

Erica Jade Montoya

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fcd/erica-jade-montoya-79211_food_practice-safe-lunch-use-a-condiment-1461_1461247.jpg)

## Top authors on Sarcasm

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- [Nenia Campbell 20 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/nenia-campbell/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b006/author-cassandra-clare-21529.jpg) Cassandra Clare 17 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/cassandra-clare/)
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- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b022/author-sherrilyn-kenyon-84925.jpg) Sherrilyn Kenyon 11 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/sherrilyn-kenyon/)
- [Mark Twain 11 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/mark-twain/)
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- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b018/author-nikhil-saluja-71464.jpg) Nikhil Saluja 6 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/nikhil-saluja/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b023/author-terry-pratchett-89528.jpg) Terry Pratchett 5 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/terry-pratchett/)
- [SouL 5 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/soul/)

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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Go make love to a tube sock.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Yeah..no, I don't really think I care.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "This music won't do. There's not enough sarcasm in it.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "New STD called Feelings.. don't catch em",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "You're so fake, Barbie is jealous.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you have nothing nice to say, shut up",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If someone called you: STUPID. Say: Compared to you, I'm Genius!",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "She: How do u feel about women's rights? Me: Idk.. I like either side..",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "SouL"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Being sarcastic to dumb people because they can't tell if your being honest.",
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                            "name": "Anonymous"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "*Saturday Nights* Me: Online, eating, watching tv. Everyone else: Partying, getting high & drunk.",
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                            "name": "Anonymous"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "She: Can I have breakfast in bed? Me: If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.",
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                            "name": "Wandini"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "You know, sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.' 'And yet it is still extremely funny.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Treat me like a joke, & I will leave you like it's funny !!!",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Cut the sarcasm. It makes you sound like an even bigger asshole”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Being nice to people you don't like isn't called being two-faced ; it's called Growing up . You should try it sometime..",
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                            "caption": "“Being nice to people you don't like isn't called being two-faced ; it's called Growing up . You should try…” — Anonymous",
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                        "text": "So, I bought a new CD and I was trying to get it open but couldn't with all the layers... I mean plastic and then tape, and the tape is like government tape. It says 'open here.' Is that sarcasm?",
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                            "@type": "Person",
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                            "caption": "“So, I bought a new CD and I was trying to get it open but couldn't with all the layers... I mean plastic and…” — Ellen DeGeneres",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Gotta have my make up, in case I run into Joey and he wants to beat the shit out of me. Gotta look my best! Maybe he'll punch me repeatedly in the kidneys and the stomach so it doesn't mark up my face. He's so thoughtful!”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
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                            "caption": "“Gotta have my make up, in case I run into Joey and he wants to beat the shit out of me. Gotta look my best!…” — George Carlin",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I'd love to start some movements. What I'm tired of is irony, and sarcasm, and music/movies/what have you, not having the guts to mean anything.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Don Hertzfeldt"
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                            "caption": "“I'd love to start some movements. What I'm tired of is irony, and sarcasm, and music/movies/what have you…” — Don Hertzfeldt",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“As could the sarcasm in her voice. \"yes, she's bleeding to death Lu upstairs, but i thought I'd avoid telling you right away, because I like to draw the suspense out.”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Cassandra Clare"
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                            "caption": "“As could the sarcasm in her voice. \"yes, she's bleeding to death Lu upstairs, but i thought I'd avoid…” — Cassandra Clare",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Don't waste yer' breath kid. Explainin' anything to that one? It's like tryin' ta' slap the dumb off a retard... -George Foster”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Shawn Durnin"
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                            "caption": "“Don't waste yer' breath kid. Explainin' anything to that one? It's like tryin' ta' slap the dumb off a…” — Shawn Durnin",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“You are quite possibly the least smooth guy I know,” she mumbled. “You can’t even put your arm around me without tripping up.”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
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                            "caption": "“You are quite possibly the least smooth guy I know,” she mumbled. “You can’t even put your arm around me…” — Lish McBride",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I'm pretty sure those're my balls you've found,” I said to the man searching my pants. “You gonna count 'em out now? Because I'll save you the trouble. There's two.”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Nenia Campbell"
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                            "caption": "“I'm pretty sure those're my balls you've found,” I said to the man searching my pants. “You gonna count 'em…” — Nenia Campbell",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Dear Producers, Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will implode and the world will suffer a great loss, unawares. Epic are the proportions of my soul, yet without a scope who cares am I? This is why I must but must be one of the inhabitants of MTV's \"Real World.\" Only there, burning brightly into a million dazzled eyes, will my as yet uncontoured self assume the beauteous forms that are not just its own, but an entire market niche's, due. I am a Kirk Cameron-Kurt Cobain figure, roguishly quirky, dandified but down to earth, kooky but comprehensible; denizen of the growing penumbra between alternative and mainstream culture; angsty prophet of the already bygone apocalypse, yet upbeat, stylish and sexy! Oscar Wilde wrote, \"Good artists exist in what they make, and consequently are perfectly uninteresting in what they are. A great poet, a really great poet, is the most unpoetical of all creatures. But inferior poets are absolutely fascinating... [they] live the poetry [they] cannot write.\" As with Dorian Gray, life is my art! Oh MTV, take me, make me, wake me from my formless slumbers and place me in the dreamy Real World of target marketing.”",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dave Eggers"
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                            "caption": "“Dear Producers, Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will implode and the…” — Dave Eggers",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment and endorse virtue and effort.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Gordon B. Hinckley"
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                            "caption": "“I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little…” — Gordon B. Hinckley",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter? Yes, said Harry stiffly. Yes, sir. There's no need to call me sir Professor. The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying. J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince",
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                            "caption": "“Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter? Yes, said Harry stiffly. Yes…” — JK Rowling",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "And then what? Said, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Ms. Lane, I didn't mean to wrinkle your lovely blouse. May I press that for you?' Or perhaps you gouged it with one of your pretty pink nails?\" I was really beginning to wonder what his hang-up with pink was, but I didn't resent the sarcasm in his voice.",
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                            "name": "Karen Marie Moning"
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                            "caption": "“And then what? Said, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Ms. Lane, I didn't mean to wrinkle your lovely blouse. May I press…” — Karen Marie Moning",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“In 1803, President Jefferson oversaw the purchase of this land from the French for $15 million. It doesn't sound like much for an area three times the size of France itself but given that they'd stolen it from the Native Americans in the first place, I suppose they couldn't grumble. Once some debts had been wiped and estate agents had taken their commission, Napoleon's France ended up pocketing a little more than $8 million. Which is about how much it cost Pepsi Cola to secure the services of Britney Spears. Times have changed.”",
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                            "name": "Dave Gorman"
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                            "caption": "“In 1803, President Jefferson oversaw the purchase of this land from the French for $15 million. It doesn't…” — Dave Gorman",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "You aren't worried are you?\" \"Why should I be worried? It's just another day in the neighborhood. You know - bombs, fires, people shooting at you. Why should I be worried? Especially since we could be clothes shopping or boarding a plane. I'm not in the least worried.\" \"Hmmm,\" he mused allowed. \"I read about this in the relationship manual. It's called womanly sarcasm and usually means a man is in deep trouble.",
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                            "name": "Christine Feehan"
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                            "caption": "“You aren't worried are you?\" \"Why should I be worried? It's just another day in the neighborhood. You know…” — Christine Feehan",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“His chief form of entertainment was reading. The last moments he was in a cabin were usually spent scanning bookshelves and nightstands. The life inside a book always felt welcoming to Knight. It pressed no demands on him, while the world of actual human interactions was so complex. Conversations between people can move like tennis games, swift and unpredictable. There are constant subtle visual and verbal cues, there's innuendo, sarcasm, body language, tone. Everyone occasionally fumbles an encounter, a victim of social clumsiness. It's part of being human. To Knight, it all felt impossible. His engagement with the written word might have been the closest he could come to genuine human encounters. The stretch of days between thieving raids allowed him to tumble into the pages, and if he felt transported he could float in bookworld, undisturbed, for as long as he pleased.”",
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                            "name": "Michael Finkel"
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