---
title: "Top Sarcasm Lines"
description: "Browse 1,265 Sarcasm quotes by 760 authors. Discover the best Sarcasm sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bec/psyche-zeroh-31967_amusement_dear-math-grow-up-and-solve-your-own-pro_1639105.jpg"
---

> [Dear Math, Grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/psyche-zeroh/dear-math-grow-up-and-solve-your-own-problems-i-m-tired-of-solving/)

[Psyche\_Zeroh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/psyche-zeroh/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bec/psyche-zeroh-31967_amusement_dear-math-grow-up-and-solve-your-own-pro_1639105.jpg)

> [I am a bit sassy, with some sarcasm thrown into the mix, but stoic at the same time - and brash.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-daniels/i-am-a-bit-sassy-with-some-sarcasm-thrown-into-the-mix-but-stoic-at/)

[Mike Daniels](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-daniels/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/332/mike-daniels-12296_i-am_i-am-a-bit-sassy-with-some-sarcasm-throw_1963314.jpg)

> [“And her dumplings were so light they would float in the air and you'd have to catch 'em to eat 'em.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fannie-flagg/and-her-dumplings-were-so-light-they-would-float-in-the-air-and-you-d/)

[Fannie Flagg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fannie-flagg/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/97b/fannie-flagg-3065_dumplings_and-her-dumplings-were-so-light-they-wou_1697529.png)

> [“Don't worry about it; only worry about how people like her breed.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gasmaskman/don-t-worry-about-it-only-worry-about-how-people-like-her-breed/)

[Gasmaskman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gasmaskman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8c1/gasmaskman-32969_dark_don-t-worry-about-it-only-worry-about-ho_2475369.jpg)

> [“You really need to work on intonation when you use sarcasm. That way people will know when you’re being an asshole.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samantha-young/you-really-need-to-work-on-intonation-when-you-use-sarcasm-that-way/)

[Samantha Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samantha-young/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6be/samantha-young-766_intonation_you-really-need-to-work-on-intonation-wh_2288799.jpg)

> [“You have to be a sexologist: when I wish your fuckin' advice, I'll let you know.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-have-to-be-a-sexologist-when-i-wish-your-fuckin-advice-i-ll-let/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e54/anonymous-1_joke_you-have-to-be-a-sexologist-when-i-wish_425065.jpg)

> [I have only one ambition left: I should like to have a good epitaph.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/otto-von-bismarck/i-have-only-one-ambition-left-i-should-like-to-have-a-good-epitaph/)

[Otto von Bismarck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/otto-von-bismarck/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41b/otto-von-bismarck-3444_ambition_i-have-only-one-ambition-left-i-should-l_3139846.png)

> [The time for action is past! Now is the time for senseless bickering!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ashleigh-brilliant/the-time-for-action-is-past-now-is-the-time-for-senseless-bickering/)

[Ashleigh Brilliant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ashleigh-brilliant/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea1/ashleigh-brilliant-944_action_the-time-for-action-is-past-now-is-the-t_2692101.png)

> [“You're back where you swore yourself you wouldn't be The familiar shackles you can't tell from your own skin Your head's under…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sanhita-baruah/you-re-back-where-you-swore-yourself-you-wouldn-t-be-the-familiar/)

[Sanhita Baruah](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sanhita-baruah/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f34/sanhita-baruah-9135_back_you-re-back-where-you-swore-yourself-you_67950.jpg)

> [“You're Professor Mills? The new one who teaches history?" As opposed to the old Professor Mills who preached overthrow of the government?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/josh-lanyon/you-re-professor-mills-the-new-one-who-teaches-history-as-opposed-to/)

[Josh Lanyon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/josh-lanyon/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/199/josh-lanyon-1827_history_you-re-professor-mills-the-new-one-who-t_274421.png)

> [My uncle, Mr. Stephen Maple, had been at the same time the most successful and the least respectable of our family, so…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-conan-doyle/my-uncle-mr-stephen-maple-had-been-at-the-same-time-the-most/)

[Arthur Conan Doyle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-conan-doyle/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ff/arthur-conan-doyle-273_ashamed_my-uncle-mr-stephen-maple-had-been-at-th_401701.jpg)

> [“He didn’t hold the door open, instead letting it fly back and knock me in the face. “Thanks,” I muttered, rubbing my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-meredith-walters/he-didn-t-hold-the-door-open-instead-letting-it-fly-back-and-knock-me/)

[A. Meredith Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-meredith-walters/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e80/a-meredith-walters-2790_sarcasm_he-didn-t-hold-the-door-open-instead-let_3003703.jpg)

> [An economist is a surgeon with an excellent scalpel and a rough-edged lancet, who operates beautifully on the dead and tortures the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicolas-chamfort/an-economist-is-a-surgeon-with-an-excellent-scalpel-and-a-rough-edged/)

[Nicolas Chamfort](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicolas-chamfort/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/48e/nicolas-chamfort-2263_economics_an-economist-is-a-surgeon-with-an-excell_2617971.jpg)

> [I think my parents are getting to think that my phone is my eye controller..if they take it away from me, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/syoung/i-think-my-parents-are-getting-to-think-that-my-phone-is-my-eye/)

[Syoung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/syoung/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/52f/syoung-8345_funny-facebook-statu_i-think-my-parents-are-getting-to-think_3177283.jpg)

> [“Or maybe, just maybe, he'd got close enough to sense the melancholy that sits at the core of her, usually hidden deep…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matt-haig/or-maybe-just-maybe-he-d-got-close-enough-to-sense-the-melancholy/)

[Matt Haig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matt-haig/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/906/matt-haig-1036_quote_or-maybe-just-maybe-he-d-got-close-enoug_1329099.jpg)

> [When I first started writing, I was living in England and I had that uniquely English sense of sarcasm, which has definitely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-green/when-i-first-started-writing-i-was-living-in-england-and-i-had-that/)

[Jane Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-green/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/faf/jane-green-5965_england_when-i-first-started-writing-i-was-livin_2178816.png)

> [I’d better get going or Valek will be wondering where I am.” “Yes, by all means go. I noticed you and Valek…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maria-v-snyder/i-d-better-get-going-or-valek-will-be-wondering-where-i-am-yes-by-all/)

[Maria V. Snyder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maria-v-snyder/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/049/maria-v-snyder-1261_decency_i-d-better-get-going-or-valek-will-be-wo_948327.png)

> [“You raise an eyebrow at me speculatively. “Really?” you enquire your voice full of sarcasm. “Respect me how Jenna? By choosing not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/felicity-brandon/you-raise-an-eyebrow-at-me-speculatively-really-you-enquire-your/)

[Felicity Brandon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/felicity-brandon/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/747/felicity-brandon-15310_bdsm-marriage_you-raise-an-eyebrow-at-me-speculatively_1949855.jpg)

> [Life is a luck coin, once you're thrown into the pond..only you can make your worth the most by making it to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zacomh/life-is-a-luck-coin-once-you-re-thrown-into-the-pond-only-you-can/)

[Zacomh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zacomh/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/33f/zacomh-288207_destined_life-is-a-luck-coin-once-you-re-thrown-i_10701.jpg)

> [Laughing at someone else is an excellent way of learning how to laugh at oneself; and questioning what seem to be the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gore-vidal/laughing-at-someone-else-is-an-excellent-way-of-learning-how-to-laugh/)

[Gore Vidal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gore-vidal/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/79f/gore-vidal-466_absurd_laughing-at-someone-else-is-an-excellent_1555444.jpg)

> [La Zona is such a closed area, a dangerous, outlaw area. My time in the Zona was a time outside of society,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-glawogger/la-zona-is-such-a-closed-area-a-dangerous-outlaw-area-my-time-in-the/)

[Michael Glawogger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-glawogger/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d81/michael-glawogger-25782_areas_la-zona-is-such-a-closed-area-a-dangerou_2280079.jpg)

> [“I have a theory that as human beings get older, chemicals are released into the brain to prepare us for the end.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kris-d-agostino/i-have-a-theory-that-as-human-beings-get-older-chemicals-are-released/)

[Kris D'Agostino](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kris-d-agostino/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ada/kris-d-agostino-81115_death_i-have-a-theory-that-as-human-beings-get_2931215.jpg)

> [“I need to ask, are you afraid of spiders?" Nicholas blinked, suddenly caught off guard, "Yes, I'm afraid of spiders." "Were you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-m-irwin/i-need-to-ask-are-you-afraid-of-spiders-nicholas-blinked-suddenly/)

[Stephen M. Irwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-m-irwin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb0/stephen-m-irwin-33439_analyzing_i-need-to-ask-are-you-afraid-of-spiders_35989.png)

> [Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a-teenager-an-actual-volcanic/)

[Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/dave-barry-222_band_teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a_256931.png)

> [Sufficiently advanced political correctness is indistinguishable from sarcasm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erik-naggum/sufficiently-advanced-political-correctness-is-indistinguishable-from/)

[Erik Naggum](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erik-naggum/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f27/erik-naggum-8459_correctness_sufficiently-advanced-political-correctn_1840042.png)

> [“A full glass of patience with a pinch of sarcasm is all you need to deal~”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tanya-gambhir/a-full-glass-of-patience-with-a-pinch-of-sarcasm-is-all-you-need-to/)

[Tanya Gambhir](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tanya-gambhir/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eca/tanya-gambhir-32725_humor_a-full-glass-of-patience-with-a-pinch-of_3005858.jpg)

> [My level of sarcasm is to a point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/my-level-of-sarcasm-is-to-a-point-where-i-don-t-even-know-if-i-m/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/70f/anonymous-1_funny_my-level-of-sarcasm-is-to-a-point-where_2622291.jpg)

> [“Each morning they came around, three brisk and serious men with efficient mouths and inefficient eyes...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-heller/each-morning-they-came-around-three-brisk-and-serious-men-with/)

[Joseph Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-heller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e3d/joseph-heller-601_greatness_each-morning-they-came-around-three-bris_3198155.png)

> [Do unto yourself as your Neighbours do unto Themselves and look Pleasant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-ade/do-unto-yourself-as-your-neighbours-do-unto-themselves-and-look/)

[George Ade](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-ade/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ea/george-ade-8718_looks_do-unto-yourself-as-your-neighbours-do-u_1030115.jpg)

> [With so many girls pregnant at school, condoms should be on the supply list.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pretty-ladii/with-so-many-girls-pregnant-at-school-condoms-should-be-on-the-supply/)

[Pretty Ladii](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pretty-ladii/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93a/pretty-ladii-9008_condom_with-so-many-girls-pregnant-at-school-co_3001745.jpg)

> [“Don't you know that I passionately dote on every chin on his face?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-l-sayers/don-t-you-know-that-i-passionately-dote-on-every-chin-on-his-face/)

[Dorothy L. Sayers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-l-sayers/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8da/dorothy-l-sayers-738_appearance_don-t-you-know-that-i-passionately-dote_1107151.jpg)

> [No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/groucho-marx/no-groucho-is-not-my-real-name-i-am-breaking-it-in-for-a-friend/)

[Groucho Marx](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/groucho-marx/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df3/groucho-marx-788_friendship_no-groucho-is-not-my-real-name-i-am-brea_2080754.jpg)

> [“Marion: What is all this? What's going on? Clint: The same thing that's always going on. The end of the world.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-pollack/marion-what-is-all-this-what-s-going-on-clint-the-same-thing-that-s/)

[Rachel Pollack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-pollack/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f18/rachel-pollack-52430_comics_marion-what-is-all-this-what-s-going-on_2182433.jpg)

> [How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/groucho-marx/how-do-you-feel-about-women-s-rights-i-like-either-side-of-them/)

[Groucho Marx](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/groucho-marx/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/644/groucho-marx-788_feels_how-do-you-feel-about-women-s-rights-i-l_1829666.jpg)

> [“Well done,' said a voice somewhere behind him. 'Consciousness to sarcasm in five seconds!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/terry-pratchett/well-done-said-a-voice-somewhere-behind-him-consciousness-to-sarcasm/)

[Terry Pratchett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/terry-pratchett/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e50/terry-pratchett-19_night-watch_well-done-said-a-voice-somewhere-behind_387845.jpg)

> [“I couldn't hack it in Hollywood, my writing's wasn't bad enough.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/russ-lippitt/i-couldn-t-hack-it-in-hollywood-my-writing-s-wasn-t-bad-enough/)

[Russ Lippitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/russ-lippitt/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd6/russ-lippitt-83769_cybersecurity_i-couldn-t-hack-it-in-hollywood-my-writi_373555.jpg)

> [Complaining about wanting a relationship just makes you look more desprate then you are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/syoung/complaining-about-wanting-a-relationship-just-makes-you-look-more/)

[Syoung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/syoung/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/61e/syoung-8345_attitude_complaining-about-wanting-a-relationship_2788778.jpg)

> [Art must always remain earnest... Art must be serious, no sarcasm, comedy. One does not laugh at a loved one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arshile-gorky/art-must-always-remain-earnest-art-must-be-serious-no-sarcasm-comedy/)

[Arshile Gorky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arshile-gorky/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e3/arshile-gorky-28618_art_art-must-always-remain-earnest-art-must_665561.jpg)

> [“In some ways blowjobs are better than sex because when you have a mouthful of cock you can't make snide comments.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nenia-campbell/in-some-ways-blowjobs-are-better-than-sex-because-when-you-have-a/)

[Nenia Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nenia-campbell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/95d/nenia-campbell-1294_sarcasm_in-some-ways-blowjobs-are-better-than-se_3035260.jpg)

> [Our brains are being destroyed by the constant ability to have banter burbling away in our pockets.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ivo-graham/our-brains-are-being-destroyed-by-the-constant-ability-to-have-banter/)

[Ivo Graham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ivo-graham/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/438/ivo-graham-19166_ability_our-brains-are-being-destroyed-by-the-co_957901.jpg)

## Top authors on Sarcasm

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- [Nenia Campbell 20 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/nenia-campbell/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b006/author-cassandra-clare-21529.jpg) Cassandra Clare 17 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/cassandra-clare/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b008/author-psyche-zeroh-31967.jpg) Psyche\_Zeroh 14 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/psyche-zeroh/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b003/author-syoung-8345.jpg) Syoung 13 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/syoung/)
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- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b022/author-sherrilyn-kenyon-84925.jpg) Sherrilyn Kenyon 11 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/sherrilyn-kenyon/)
- [Mark Twain 11 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/mark-twain/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b002/author-rakii-retondo-7522.jpg) Rakii Retondo 8 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/rakii-retondo/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b018/author-nikhil-saluja-71464.jpg) Nikhil Saluja 6 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/nikhil-saluja/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b023/author-terry-pratchett-89528.jpg) Terry Pratchett 5 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/terry-pratchett/)
- [SouL 5 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarcasm/soul/)

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                        "text": "Dear Math, Grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.",
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                        "text": "“You're back where you swore yourself you wouldn't be The familiar shackles you can't tell from your own skin Your head's under water when you learned to swim On a road to hell, congratulations, you're free...”",
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                        "text": "“You're Professor Mills? The new one who teaches history?\" As opposed to the old Professor Mills who preached overthrow of the government?”",
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                        "text": "My uncle, Mr. Stephen Maple, had been at the same time the most successful and the least respectable of our family, so that we hardly knew whether to take credit for his wealth or to feel ashamed of his position.",
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                        "text": "I’d better get going or Valek will be wondering where I am.” “Yes, by all means go. I noticed you and Valek have become close. Tell him, for me, not to kill anybody, will you?” Sarcasm rendered Rand’s voice sharp. I lost control and slammed the oven door shut. It echoed in the quiet kitchen. “At least Valek has the decency to inform me when he’s poisoning me,",
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                        "text": "“You raise an eyebrow at me speculatively. “Really?” you enquire your voice full of sarcasm. “Respect me how Jenna? By choosing not to spend any time with me? By not even bothering to let me know where you are? By rolling in when you feel like it? Well then… I think we need to redefine what we mean by respect Jenna, don’t you?”",
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                        "text": "Life is a luck coin, once you're thrown into the pond..only you can make your worth the most by making it to the people's mouth. BE THEIR LUCK, HAVE THEM CALLING YOU THE LUCKY COIN. DONT MAKE THEM THROW YOU FOR LUCK, MAKE THEM HAVE YOU FOR A FORTUNE.",
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                        "text": "Laughing at someone else is an excellent way of learning how to laugh at oneself; and questioning what seem to be the absurd beliefs of another group is a good way of recognizing the potential absurdity of many of one's own cherished beliefs.",
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                        "text": "La Zona is such a closed area, a dangerous, outlaw area. My time in the Zona was a time outside of society, almost out of the real world. And the girls there had such a sense of irony and sarcasm. They were also really interested in my film. They'd be like, \"Thank God we live in Mexico, because our kind of prostitution has a heart. We wouldn't want to sit behind a glass cage or be sold by our own mothers. We have free will.\"",
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                        "text": "“I have a theory that as human beings get older, chemicals are released into the brain to prepare us for the end. Sort of like how the nurse lubes your ass up before the anus-cam. It makes the whole thing a lot easier to swallow. Easier, not enjoyable.”",
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                        "text": "“I need to ask, are you afraid of spiders?\" Nicholas blinked, suddenly caught off guard, \"Yes, I'm afraid of spiders.\" \"Were you always?\" \"What are you, a psychiatrist?\" Pritam took a breath. He could feel Laine's eyes on him, appraising his line of questioning. \"Is it possible that the trauma of losing your best friend as a child and the trauma of losing your wife as an adult and the trauma of seeing Laine's husband take his life in front of you just recently...\" Pritam shrugged and raised his palms, \"You see where I'm going?\" Nicholas looked at Laine. She watched back. Her gray eyes missed nothing. \"Sure,\" agreed Nicholas, standing. \"And my sister's nuts, too, and we both like imagining that little white dogs are big nasty spiders because our daddy died and we never got enough cuddles.\" \"Your father died?\" asked Laine. \"When?\" \"Who cares?\" Pritam sighed. \"You must see this from our point of - \" \"I'd love to!\" snapped Nicholas. \"I'd love to see it from your point of view, because mine is not that much fun! It's insane! It's insane that I see dead people, Pritam! It's insane that this,\" he flicked out the sardonyx necklace,\"stopped me from kidnapping a little girl!\" \"That's what you believe,\" Pritam said carefully. \"That's what I fucking believe!\" Nicholas stabbed his finger through the air at the dead bird talisman lying slack on the coffee table.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks raining from the sky, lava floes destroying entire villages, etc., and the teenager, eyebrows arched with sarcasm, will look at you and say, \"Gee, this is swell,\" then return to the rental car, turn on his portable CD player, and listen to a band called Stomach Contents.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dave Barry"
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                        "text": "Sufficiently advanced political correctness is indistinguishable from sarcasm.",
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                            "caption": "“Sufficiently advanced political correctness is indistinguishable from sarcasm.” — Erik Naggum",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“A full glass of patience with a pinch of sarcasm is all you need to deal~”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "My level of sarcasm is to a point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Each morning they came around, three brisk and serious men with efficient mouths and inefficient eyes...”",
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                            "name": "Joseph Heller"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Do unto yourself as your Neighbours do unto Themselves and look Pleasant.",
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                            "name": "George Ade"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "With so many girls pregnant at school, condoms should be on the supply list.",
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                            "name": "Pretty Ladii"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Don't you know that I passionately dote on every chin on his face?”",
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                            "name": "Dorothy L. Sayers"
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                        "text": "No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.",
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