---
title: "1 Retail Pope Quotes By Christopher Moore"
description: "1 Retail Pope quotes by Christopher Moore. Plus more from Christopher Moore and more Retail Pope sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80e/christopher-moore-353_christopher-moore_soon-a-whole-guild-of-low-priced-shrine_346750.png"
---

> [ “Soon a whole guild of low-priced shrine keepers around Europe named their own pope - Boldface the Relatively Shameless, Discount Pope of Prague. The price war was on \[...\] The Retail Pope would offer cheesy bacon toppings on the Host… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/soon-a-whole-guild-of-low-priced-shrine-keepers-around-europe-named/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80e/christopher-moore-353_christopher-moore_soon-a-whole-guild-of-low-priced-shrine_346750.png)

## More by Christopher Moore

> [“Love them all," said Renoir. "That is the secret, young man. Love them all." The painter let go of his arm and shrugged. "Then,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/love-them-all-said-renoir-that-is-the-secret-young-man-love-them-all/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/i-tried-cutting-myself-to-express-my-heartbreak-over-tommy-lord-flood/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/canada-is-a-myth-people-made-up-to-entertain-children-like-the-tooth/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [Sarcasm will make your tits fall off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/sarcasm-will-make-your-tits-fall-off/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“I hope you are not here to ask me to do my bawdy business- the monkey has a nosebleed and the circus, sir, is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/i-hope-you-are-not-here-to-ask-me-to-do-my-bawdy-business-the-monkey/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/the-prospect-of-change-is-a-many-fanged-beast-my-dear/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“The night was crisp and the stars shone with a cold blue light like loneliness or infinity.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/the-night-was-crisp-and-the-stars-shone-with-a-cold-blue-light-like/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [Children see magic because they look for it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/children-see-magic-because-they-look-for-it/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“Abby Von Normal - And I'm like, "Don't change the subject, Kung Pao, what I want to know is if you're ready to spend…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/abby-von-normal-and-i-m-like-don-t-change-the-subject-kung-pao-what-i/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/you-can-t-just-go-around-blurting-out-the-truth-like-a-prophet-with/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [How could you deal with a creature as devious as woman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/how-could-you-deal-with-a-creature-as-devious-as-woman/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“…turning your ankle hurts like hell, even if you're a superhero.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/turning-your-ankle-hurts-like-hell-even-if-you-re-a-superhero/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [Lonliness evaporated off of them like the steam off dry ice, and by morning it was just a cloud on the ceiling of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/lonliness-evaporated-off-of-them-like-the-steam-off-dry-ice-and-by/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“Give us a call or you know, flash a searchlight in the sky with your logo on it, because we monitor everything.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/give-us-a-call-or-you-know-flash-a-searchlight-in-the-sky-with-your/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

> [“it wasn't so much like the hands of time had stood still here, more like they'd been thrown in the air in exasperation, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-moore/it-wasn-t-so-much-like-the-hands-of-time-had-stood-still-here-more/)

[Christopher Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-moore/)

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