--- title: "14 Pot Quotes By Doug Benson" description: "14 Pot quotes by Doug Benson. Plus more from Doug Benson and more Pot sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png" --- > [The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like potheads.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge-issue-with-me-because-i-ve/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png) > [People say pot-smokers are lazy. I disagree; I'm a multitasking pot-smoker: just the other day I was walking down the street, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/people-say-pot-smokers-are-lazy-i-disagree-i-m-a-multitasking-pot/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/141/doug-benson-8961_car_people-say-pot-smokers-are-lazy-i-disagr_2739393.jpg) > [In terms of my lungs, pot smoking is not like cigarette smoking. It doesn't affect the lungs as quickly, or as much…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not-like-cigarette-smoking-it/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/620/doug-benson-8961_cigarette_in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not_917027.jpg) > [We don't want any pot-smoking vaginas because that's disgusting. And I saw it once in Indonesia, and I've never been able to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-because-that-s-disgusting-and-i/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/20f/doug-benson-8961_able_we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-be_999154.png) > [A talking dog is not the answer. That's not a way to convince people not to smoke pot. If animals started talking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/a-talking-dog-is-not-the-answer-that-s-not-a-way-to-convince-people/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c9c/doug-benson-8961_animal_a-talking-dog-is-not-the-answer-that-s-n_266835.png) > [I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed that audiences invariably love pot jokes. Even people who don't smoke pot think it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed-that-audiences-invariably/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/doug-benson-8961_audience_i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed_1811002.png) > [Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut the hell up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-periods-of-time-for-instance-2/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8fa/doug-benson-8961_hell_smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-p_2703660.png) > [If someone wants to make a joke about me smoking too much pot, I'm not going to get mad at them, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/if-someone-wants-to-make-a-joke-about-me-smoking-too-much-pot-i-m-not/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/200/doug-benson-8961_comedy_if-someone-wants-to-make-a-joke-about-me_1027718.png) > [I'm not trying to recruit anyone. I think minds can be changed, but I also think they don't have to be changed.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think-minds-can-be-changed-but-i/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cce/doug-benson-8961_change_i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think_2994537.png) > [Fortunately, most of my friends in comedy that smoke pot are almost as open about it as I am, and in some…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy-that-smoke-pot-are-almost-as/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/460/doug-benson-8961_about-friendship_fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy_2765931.png) > [If you have anyone smoking pot in a movie it automatically, I think, knocks it up to maybe PG-13 movie rating and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movie-it-automatically-i-think/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b46/doug-benson-8961_chance_if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movi_2987473.jpg) > [Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut the hell up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-periods-of-time-for-instance/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c80/doug-benson-8961_comic_smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-p_1834605.png) > [Pot advocates actually try to convince people who don't need or want medical marijuana to go get a card, because as those…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-people-who-don-t-need-or-want/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e80/doug-benson-8961_cancer_pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-p_2889368.png) > [Since my act is a goofy reflection of what's going on in my life, I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-what-s-going-on-in-my-life-i/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/307/doug-benson-8961_audience_since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-wh_1785064.jpg) ## Other authors on Pot ## More by Doug Benson > [I grew up in San Diego, so it wasn't hard to move to L.A. to get into show business, but I did the standard…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-grew-up-in-san-diego-so-it-wasn-t-hard-to-move-to-l-a-to-get-into/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [It's easier to do comedy with an audience, because their reactions tell you whether or not what your saying qualifies as comedy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/it-s-easier-to-do-comedy-with-an-audience-because-their-reactions/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like potheads.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge-issue-with-me-because-i-ve/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [I know there's a lot of nasty humor directed at celebrities, but my feeling is, in most cases, they deserve it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-know-there-s-a-lot-of-nasty-humor-directed-at-celebrities-but-my/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [Big deal... the only cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero legs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/big-deal-the-only-cats-that-don-t-have-three-legs-are-the-ones-with/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [Has anybody here ever been driving along in their car, smoking a cigarette, and you flick it out the window, and you drive for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/has-anybody-here-ever-been-driving-along-in-their-car-smoking-a/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [A talking dog is not the answer. That's not a way to convince people not to smoke pot. If animals started talking to me,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/a-talking-dog-is-not-the-answer-that-s-not-a-way-to-convince-people/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [I think there is much more storytelling in stand-up now. Less emphasis on the joke. Jokes are still important, but it feels like a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-think-there-is-much-more-storytelling-in-stand-up-now-less-emphasis/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [I just broke up with my girlfriend because I caught her lying. Under another man.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-just-broke-up-with-my-girlfriend-because-i-caught-her-lying-under/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [Stand-up is a very scary, very solitary profession, but you have to experience it to figure out if it's right for you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/stand-up-is-a-very-scary-very-solitary-profession-but-you-have-to/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [People come to me with ideas for shows, and I certainly am thinking of stuff all the time. And it's always like, you know,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/people-come-to-me-with-ideas-for-shows-and-i-certainly-am-thinking-of/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [Even if you are 18, my advice to you is: plan for your future.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/even-if-you-are-18-my-advice-to-you-is-plan-for-your-future/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [There was always, along the way in my career, as more and more I made marijuana a part of my act and my life,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/there-was-always-along-the-way-in-my-career-as-more-and-more-i-made/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [My parents took me to that I think is just one of those near-perfect comedies is Young Frankenstein. Gene Wilder and Mel Brooks, they're…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/my-parents-took-me-to-that-i-think-is-just-one-of-those-near-perfect/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) > [Rappers should be forced to rhyme in their acceptance speeches.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/rappers-should-be-forced-to-rhyme-in-their-acceptance-speeches/) [Doug Benson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doug-benson/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pot/doug-benson/#itemlist", "name": "14 Pot Quotes By Doug Benson", "numberOfItems": 14, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like potheads.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge-issue-with-me-because-i-ve/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "People say pot-smokers are lazy. 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If I stopped pot smoking today, my lungs could heal probably 100 percent in a few years.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not-like-cigarette-smoking-it/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/620/doug-benson-8961_cigarette_in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not_917027.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/620/doug-benson-8961_cigarette_in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not_917027.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/620/doug-benson-8961_cigarette_in-terms-of-my-lungs-pot-smoking-is-not_917027.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“In terms of my lungs, pot smoking is not like cigarette smoking. 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And I saw it once in Indonesia, and I've never been able to get it out of my head.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-because-that-s-disgusting-and-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/20f/doug-benson-8961_able_we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-be_999154.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/20f/doug-benson-8961_able_we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-be_999154.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/20f/doug-benson-8961_able_we-don-t-want-any-pot-smoking-vaginas-be_999154.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We don't want any pot-smoking vaginas because that's disgusting. 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Even people who don't smoke pot think it's a funny subject.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed-that-audiences-invariably/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/doug-benson-8961_audience_i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed_1811002.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/doug-benson-8961_audience_i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed_1811002.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d08/doug-benson-8961_audience_i-started-doing-pot-jokes-and-i-noticed_1811002.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed that audiences invariably love pot jokes. 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I think minds can be changed, but I also think they don't have to be changed. If someone doesn't want to smoke pot and doesn't think it should be legal, then that's fine, but the numbers that do are going to continue to grow to the point where change will eventually occur.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think-minds-can-be-changed-but-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cce/doug-benson-8961_change_i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think_2994537.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cce/doug-benson-8961_change_i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think_2994537.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cce/doug-benson-8961_change_i-m-not-trying-to-recruit-anyone-i-think_2994537.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm not trying to recruit anyone. I think minds can be changed, but I also think they don't have to be…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Fortunately, most of my friends in comedy that smoke pot are almost as open about it as I am, and in some cases more so. But most that appear, it's more about friendship with me than making some statement about pot. I'm sure those of my friends who are onscreen smoking might have a little regret, but there's not too much of it.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy-that-smoke-pot-are-almost-as/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/460/doug-benson-8961_about-friendship_fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy_2765931.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/460/doug-benson-8961_about-friendship_fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy_2765931.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/460/doug-benson-8961_about-friendship_fortunately-most-of-my-friends-in-comedy_2765931.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Fortunately, most of my friends in comedy that smoke pot are almost as open about it as I am, and in some…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you have anyone smoking pot in a movie it automatically, I think, knocks it up to maybe PG-13 movie rating and if there's a lot of it, even an R rating, even though chances are it is a legal activity in whatever place the film takes place.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movie-it-automatically-i-think/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b46/doug-benson-8961_chance_if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movi_2987473.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b46/doug-benson-8961_chance_if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movi_2987473.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b46/doug-benson-8961_chance_if-you-have-anyone-smoking-pot-in-a-movi_2987473.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you have anyone smoking pot in a movie it automatically, I think, knocks it up to maybe PG-13 movie…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut the hell up about it. On the other hand, no one really needs to defend drinking. That's something that frustrates me as a comic: I have to play clubs where selling booze runs the business, so crowds get drunk and yell out a bunch of stupid stuff at me. Pot doesn't cause people to do that. I did a show in Amsterdam a few months ago, and people weren't yelling stuff out at all. They also weren't laughing very much, but I think they were still having a good time.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-periods-of-time-for-instance/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c80/doug-benson-8961_comic_smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-p_1834605.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c80/doug-benson-8961_comic_smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-p_1834605.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c80/doug-benson-8961_comic_smoking-pot-makes-people-talk-for-long-p_1834605.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Pot advocates actually try to convince people who don't need or want medical marijuana to go get a card, because as those numbers go up, it's like voting for an initiative. It's saying \"There are this many people who want to use this who are not getting in trouble, who are not turning around and selling it or giving it to minors.\" No matter what they have - cancer, HIV, depression - anybody who says they feel better after smoking marijuana, I feel they should be able to do so, especially if it's in the privacy of their own home.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-people-who-don-t-need-or-want/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e80/doug-benson-8961_cancer_pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-p_2889368.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e80/doug-benson-8961_cancer_pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-p_2889368.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e80/doug-benson-8961_cancer_pot-advocates-actually-try-to-convince-p_2889368.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Pot advocates actually try to convince people who don't need or want medical marijuana to go get a card…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Since my act is a goofy reflection of what's going on in my life, I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed that audiences invariably love pot jokes. Even people who don't smoke pot think it's a funny subject. So when I started getting laughs, I started doing more material about it. When people come to see my shows, there are a lot of stoners in the audience, but there are also a lot of people who just like me. So I try to give a healthy mix, where people aren't going \"There are too many jokes about pot!\" or \"There's not enough jokes about pot!\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Doug Benson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doug-benson/since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-what-s-going-on-in-my-life-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/307/doug-benson-8961_audience_since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-wh_1785064.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/307/doug-benson-8961_audience_since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-wh_1785064.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/307/doug-benson-8961_audience_since-my-act-is-a-goofy-reflection-of-wh_1785064.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Since my act is a goofy reflection of what's going on in my life, I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed…” — Doug Benson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pot/doug-benson/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pot/doug-benson/", "name": "Pot Quotes by Doug Benson", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/pot/doug-benson/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/doug-benson-8961_alcohol_the-whole-pot-to-alcohol-thing-is-a-huge_159899.png" }, "description": "14 Pot quotes by Doug Benson. 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