---
title: "60 Pissing Quotes by 56 authors"
description: "Browse 60 Pissing quotes by 56 authors. Discover the best Pissing sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e0/harshit-241696_love_love-is-like-pissing-we-can-t-control-it_3014076.jpg"
---

> [Love is like pissing,we can't control it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/harshit/love-is-like-pissing-we-can-t-control-it/)

[Harshit](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/harshit/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e0/harshit-241696_love_love-is-like-pissing-we-can-t-control-it_3014076.jpg)

> [Crying was like pissing everything out on the ground.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/crying-was-like-pissing-everything-out-on-the-ground/)

[Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ed5/stephen-king-13_cry_crying-was-like-pissing-everything-out-o_854238.jpg)

> [You're all just pissing in the wind. You don't know it, but you are.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-young/you-re-all-just-pissing-in-the-wind-you-don-t-know-it-but-you-are/)

[Neil Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-young/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5c8/neil-young-969_honesty_you-re-all-just-pissing-in-the-wind-you_2352635.jpg)

> [Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-powell/being-responsible-sometimes-means-pissing-people-off/)

[Colin Powell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-powell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/194/colin-powell-691_being-responsible_being-responsible-sometimes-means-pissin_1133708.jpg)

> [Doing the right thing sometimes means pissing people off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/doing-the-right-thing-sometimes-means-pissing-people-off/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/595/anonymous-1_attitude_doing-the-right-thing-sometimes-means-pi_2221572.jpg)

> [When Anderson walks into a room, you can hear a rat pissing on cotton.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chael-sonnen/when-anderson-walks-into-a-room-you-can-hear-a-rat-pissing-on-cotton/)

[Chael Sonnen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chael-sonnen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/77b/chael-sonnen-3003_cotton_when-anderson-walks-into-a-room-you-can_678989.jpg)

> [Pissing people off should be a sport](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/priyanka/pissing-people-off-should-be-a-sport/)

[Priyanka](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/priyanka/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c3/priyanka-9689_feelings_pissing-people-off-should-be-a-sport-337_33784.jpg)

> [“And you had to do that in a thunderstorm pissing down like a camel?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/poppet/and-you-had-to-do-that-in-a-thunderstorm-pissing-down-like-a-camel/)

[Poppet](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/poppet/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b41/poppet-3571_humor_and-you-had-to-do-that-in-a-thunderstorm_688811.jpg)

> [I lift my leg to urinate on conserative christians, cause I have never seen a dog hold his dick while he's pissing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/immortal-technique/i-lift-my-leg-to-urinate-on-conserative-christians-cause-i-have-never/)

[Immortal Technique](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/immortal-technique/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/789/immortal-technique-2529_urinate_i-lift-my-leg-to-urinate-on-conserative_2398429.png)

> [ “Now that we have the pissing contest out of the way, we need information. \[Rayna\]” ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-r-merrick/now-that-we-have-the-pissing-contest-out-of-the-way-we-need/)

[M.R. Merrick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-r-merrick/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/142/m-r-merrick-19262_awesomeness_now-that-we-have-the-pissing-contest-out_1036069.jpg)

> [One man wrote me, saying, 'You know who you are? You're nothing but a Captain Bly pissing up a drainpipe!'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-bly/one-man-wrote-me-saying-you-know-who-you-are-you-re-nothing-but-a/)

[Robert Bly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-bly/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/436/robert-bly-3269_captains_one-man-wrote-me-saying-you-know-who-you_2172155.png)

> [Brown nosers and asskissers have been pissing off cool people since the dawn of time. At some point, they always get their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/brown-nosers-and-asskissers-have-been-pissing-off-cool-people-since/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aca/anonymous-1_comeuppance_brown-nosers-and-asskissers-have-been-pi_2588919.jpg)

> [“I won’t be target practice in whatever little pissing contest you’ve got going on with him”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lani-diane-rich/i-won-t-be-target-practice-in-whatever-little-pissing-contest-you-ve/)

[Lani Diane Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lani-diane-rich/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a14/lani-diane-rich-31355_goals_i-won-t-be-target-practice-in-whatever-l_1876019.jpg)

> [“I’m nothing more than a talking urinal cake. The world is pissing on me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-o-donovan/i-m-nothing-more-than-a-talking-urinal-cake-the-world-is-pissing-on-me/)

[Donald O'Donovan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-o-donovan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9fe/donald-o-donovan-22817_fart_i-m-nothing-more-than-a-talking-urinal-c_2381811.jpg)

> [If you’re not pissing someone off, you probably aren’t doing anything important.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/oliver/if-you-re-not-pissing-someone-off-you-probably-aren-t-doing-anything/)

[Oliver $](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/oliver/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/886/oliver-2-28621_ifs_if-you-re-not-pissing-someone-off-you-pr_68826.jpg)

> [Pissing people off doesn't mean you're doing the right things, but doing the right things will almost inevitably piss people off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-powell/pissing-people-off-doesn-t-mean-you-re-doing-the-right-things-but/)

[Colin Powell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-powell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7e9/colin-powell-691_doing-right_pissing-people-off-doesn-t-mean-you-re-d_70611.jpg)

> [“Anyway, it's two in the morning and we're taking turns pissing off of the tower (rather than going at the same time,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-wong/anyway-it-s-two-in-the-morning-and-we-re-taking-turns-pissing-off-of/)

[David Wong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-wong/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac7/david-wong-1098_fart_anyway-it-s-two-in-the-morning-and-we-re_1481801.png)

> [Are you up? Dressing? (Astrid) No. I’m pissing on your rug. What do you think I’m doing? (Zarek) I’m blind. For all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherrilyn-kenyon/are-you-up-dressing-astrid-no-i-m-pissing-on-your-rug-what-do-you/)

[Sherrilyn Kenyon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherrilyn-kenyon/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/75c/sherrilyn-kenyon-25_blind_are-you-up-dressing-astrid-no-i-m-pissin_2298060.jpg)

> [I love you and why should I care for what people say about you? No matter what they say, I know that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-love-you-and-why-should-i-care-for-what-people-say-about-you-no/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f31/anonymous-1_time_i-love-you-and-why-should-i-care-for-wha_983631.jpg)

> [Every time you piss me off, I gain the courage to say goodbye to you. I wonder how much more pissing off…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lance-rufino-marquez/every-time-you-piss-me-off-i-gain-the-courage-to-say-goodbye-to-you-i/)

[Lance Rufino Marquez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lance-rufino-marquez/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9c0/lance-rufino-marquez-255126_courage_every-time-you-piss-me-off-i-gain-the-co_1684045.jpg)

> [The picture of the guy pissing on the chair was a picture I had to do. I had the idea of this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wolfgang-tillmans/the-picture-of-the-guy-pissing-on-the-chair-was-a-picture-i-had-to-do/)

[Wolfgang Tillmans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wolfgang-tillmans/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e65/wolfgang-tillmans-15537_absurd_the-picture-of-the-guy-pissing-on-the-ch_2041290.jpg)

> [She had many things to do in her life,but everytime she tried to make me happy,i kept on pissing in my pants,but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamsta-e-ngugz/she-had-many-things-to-do-in-her-life-but-everytime-she-tried-to-make/)

[Jamsta E Ngugz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamsta-e-ngugz/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b67/jamsta-e-ngugz-16488_life_she-had-many-things-to-do-in-her-life-bu_1231651.jpg)

> [“That thing about don't look up here, you're pissing on your shoes, for instance, was that humor? Or a growl of rage?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/that-thing-about-don-t-look-up-here-you-re-pissing-on-your-shoes-for/)

[Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/814/stephen-king-13_anger_that-thing-about-don-t-look-up-here-you_1392127.jpg)

> [“I'm past competing in pissing contests. My jet stream is now more of a trickle. The only contest I'd win is the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-maclearn/i-m-past-competing-in-pissing-contests-my-jet-stream-is-now-more-of-a/)

[Brian MacLearn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-maclearn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/brian-maclearn-56114_arguments_i-m-past-competing-in-pissing-contests-m_2012449.jpg)

> [“We are like a bunch of dogs squirting on fire hydrants. We poison the groundwater with our toxic piss, marking everything MINE…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/we-are-like-a-bunch-of-dogs-squirting-on-fire-hydrants-we-poison-the-2/)

[John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/768/john-green-12_death_we-are-like-a-bunch-of-dogs-squirting-on_814858.jpg)

> [“Here, most of the men step to the side of the road, drop their drawers, and go when ever the mood strikes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-reece/here-most-of-the-men-step-to-the-side-of-the-road-drop-their-drawers/)

[Julie Reece](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-reece/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ef8/julie-reece-35478_guys_here-most-of-the-men-step-to-the-side-of_2185751.jpg)

> [“Wear this, don't wear that. Do this chore now and do this chore when you get a chance and by that I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gillian-flynn/wear-this-don-t-wear-that-do-this-chore-now-and-do-this-chore-when/)

[Gillian Flynn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gillian-flynn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/34b/gillian-flynn-316_book-club_wear-this-don-t-wear-that-do-this-chore_2647963.jpg)

> [“Holding his breath, swaying drunkenly beneath a bulb which illumined little more than grime and moisture, Moon stared awhile at the cement…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-matthiessen/holding-his-breath-swaying-drunkenly-beneath-a-bulb-which-illumined/)

[Peter Matthiessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-matthiessen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f0a/peter-matthiessen-5795_weak-in-the-knees_holding-his-breath-swaying-drunkenly-ben_2398337.jpg)

> [“Right or not, you're pissing me the fuck off.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maya-banks/right-or-not-you-re-pissing-me-the-fuck-off/)

[Maya Banks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maya-banks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e4/maya-banks-617_fuck_right-or-not-you-re-pissing-me-the-fuck_2841129.jpg)

> [If you are pissing people off, you know you are doing something right.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-lydon/if-you-are-pissing-people-off-you-know-you-are-doing-something-right/)

[John Lydon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-lydon/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e89/john-lydon-1234_doing-right_if-you-are-pissing-people-off-you-know-y_3151308.jpg)

> [Writing history is like drinking an ocean and pissing a cupful.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gustave-flaubert/writing-history-is-like-drinking-an-ocean-and-pissing-a-cupful/)

[Gustave Flaubert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gustave-flaubert/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/512/gustave-flaubert-354_drinking_writing-history-is-like-drinking-an-ocea_1576762.jpg)

> [Pissing in a river, watching it rise.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patti-smith/pissing-in-a-river-watching-it-rise/)

[Patti Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patti-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e89/patti-smith-394_egotism_pissing-in-a-river-watching-it-rise-2828_2828004.jpg)

> [“She who gets in the middle of a pissing match will only get wet.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brent-weeks/she-who-gets-in-the-middle-of-a-pissing-match-will-only-get-wet/)

[Brent Weeks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brent-weeks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a78/brent-weeks-1256_match_she-who-gets-in-the-middle-of-a-pissing_340629.png)

> [“Pissing is the least of my talents. You ought to see me shit”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-r-r-martin/pissing-is-the-least-of-my-talents-you-ought-to-see-me-shit/)

[George R.R. Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-r-r-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/122/george-r-r-martin-48_a-dance-with-dragons_pissing-is-the-least-of-my-talents-you-o_675289.png)

> [“Whether your pleasing or pissing everybody off, your doing something wrong.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-cook/whether-your-pleasing-or-pissing-everybody-off-your-doing-something/)

[David Cook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-cook/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f41/david-cook-19277_quote_whether-your-pleasing-or-pissing-everybo_1065804.jpg)

> [“Then it hits me. I was just in a pissing contest with my dog. There are no words.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samantha-towle/then-it-hits-me-i-was-just-in-a-pissing-contest-with-my-dog-there-are/)

[Samantha Towle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samantha-towle/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aef/samantha-towle-2502_dog_then-it-hits-me-i-was-just-in-a-pissing_1850852.jpg)

> [“That's how I want to go. Taking my own way out and totally pissing everybody off at the end.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/l-j-smith/that-s-how-i-want-to-go-taking-my-own-way-out-and-totally-pissing/)

[L.J. Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/l-j-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9fa/l-j-smith-962_death_that-s-how-i-want-to-go-taking-my-own-wa_53151.png)

> [Better to have your enemies inside your tent pissing out, then to have them outside your tent pissing in.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doris-kearns-goodwin/better-to-have-your-enemies-inside-your-tent-pissing-out-then-to-have/)

[Doris Kearns Goodwin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doris-kearns-goodwin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c9/doris-kearns-goodwin-1951_enemy_better-to-have-your-enemies-inside-your_1587091.png)

> [O something missing the shower pissing all up in your mouth what you think I'm kitten](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lil-kim-2/o-something-missing-the-shower-pissing-all-up-in-your-mouth-what-you/)

[Lil Kim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lil-kim-2/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cbc/lil-kim-2-11043_quote_o-something-missing-the-shower-pissing-a_1396257.jpg)

> [“There really isn't much use in getting into a pissing contest since I have to sit down to pee anyway.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tammy-blackwell/there-really-isn-t-much-use-in-getting-into-a-pissing-contest-since-i/)

[Tammy Blackwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tammy-blackwell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f7/tammy-blackwell-14073_contest_there-really-isn-t-much-use-in-getting-i_452867.jpg)

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                        "text": "“Now that we have the pissing contest out of the way, we need information. [Rayna]”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
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                        "text": "“Anyway, it's two in the morning and we're taking turns pissing off of the tower (rather than going at the same time, because we weren't raised by wolves). So it's my turn and I'm right at that transcendent moment when the long stream of urine connects me and the ground below...”",
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                        "text": "Are you up? Dressing? (Astrid) No. I’m pissing on your rug. What do you think I’m doing? (Zarek) I’m blind. For all I know you really are peeing on my rug, which is a very nice rug incidentally, so I hope you’re kidding. (Astrid)",
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                        "text": "I love you and why should I care for what people say about you? No matter what they say, I know that satisfying everyone every time is impossible but pissing them is so much FUN.",
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                        "text": "Every time you piss me off, I gain the courage to say goodbye to you. I wonder how much more pissing off you have to make so I can really finally say my last goodbye to you.",
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                        "text": "The picture of the guy pissing on the chair was a picture I had to do. I had the idea of this absurd act of pissing on a chair rather than in a toilet or on the ground, and this minimal act being so transgressive, even though no major harm is done.",
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                        "text": "She had many things to do in her life,but everytime she tried to make me happy,i kept on pissing in my pants,but she still loved me anyway. I love you MOM!!",
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                        "text": "“That thing about don't look up here, you're pissing on your shoes, for instance, was that humor? Or a growl of rage? --All That You Love Will Be Carried Away.”",
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                        "text": "“I'm past competing in pissing contests. My jet stream is now more of a trickle. The only contest I'd win is the number of trips to the bathroom it takes to purge a 32oz soda.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“We are like a bunch of dogs squirting on fire hydrants. We poison the groundwater with our toxic piss, marking everything MINE in a ridiculous attempt to survive our deaths. I can't stop pissing on fire hydrants. I know it's silly and useless-epically useless in my current state-but I am an animal like any other.”",
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                        "text": "“Here, most of the men step to the side of the road, drop their drawers, and go when ever the mood strikes them. They’re beyond disgusting,whipping out their willies like weapons.The soldiers make jokes, hold pissing contests while comparing sizes,and think its hilarious.Personally, I could do with a little less hilarity.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Wear this, don't wear that. Do this chore now and do this chore when you get a chance and by that I mean now. And definitely, definitely give up the things you love fro me, so I will have proof that you love me best. It's the female pissing contest -- as we swan around our book clubs and our cocktail hours, there are few things women love more than being able to detail the sacrifices our men make for us. A call-and-response, the response being: \"Ohh, that's so sweet.”",
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                            "caption": "“Wear this, don't wear that. Do this chore now and do this chore when you get a chance and by that I mean…” — Gillian Flynn",
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                        "text": "“Holding his breath, swaying drunkenly beneath a bulb which illumined little more than grime and moisture, Moon stared awhile at the cement wall; it took just such a hopeless international latrine in the early hours of a morning, when a man was weak in the knees, short in the breath, numb in the forehead and rotten in the gut, to make him wonder where he was, how he got there, where he was going; he realized that he did not know and never would. He had confronted this same latrine on every continent and not once had it come up with an answer; or rather, it always came up with the same answer, a suck and gurgle of unspeakable vileness, a sort of self-satisfied low chuckling: Go to it, man, you’re pissing your life away.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Right or not, you're pissing me the fuck off.”",
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                        "text": "If you are pissing people off, you know you are doing something right.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Writing history is like drinking an ocean and pissing a cupful.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Pissing in a river, watching it rise.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“She who gets in the middle of a pissing match will only get wet.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Pissing is the least of my talents. You ought to see me shit”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Whether your pleasing or pissing everybody off, your doing something wrong.”",
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