--- title: "10 Persons Quotes By Esther Perel" description: "10 Persons quotes by Esther Perel. Plus more from Esther Perel and more Persons sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png" --- > [Today, monogamy is one person at a time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png) > [It's our imagination that's responsible for love, not the other person.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible-for-love-not-the-other-person/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/esther-perel-3265_imagination_it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible_374194.png) > [It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-the-person-we-are-with-as-we/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80b/esther-perel-3265_inspirational_it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-t_2440686.png) > [In dating, if you say no, your lover goes on to the next person. In marriage, if you say no, the person…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes-on-to-the-next-person-in/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4db/esther-perel-3265_dating_in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes_188244.png) > [When we seek the gaze of another, it isn't always our partner we're turning away from, but the person we have ourselves…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn-t-always-our-partner-we-re/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/157/esther-perel-3265_gaze_when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn_386300.png) > [If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given-up-too-many-parts-of/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/03a/esther-perel-3265_ends_if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given_81226.png) > [Success, to me, is helping one person or many people counter the isolation and pseudoconnectivity of our lives by boosting their ability…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-many-people-counter-the/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7b/esther-perel-3265_ability_success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-m_492710.jpg) > [Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and continuity. At…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-what-an-entire-village-once/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d8/esther-perel-3265_committed_today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-w_1932487.png) > [Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longings-that-are-much-more/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14a/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longin_7823.png) > [Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are looking for another…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because-we-are-looking-for-another/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/414/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because_1400835.png) ## Other authors on Persons ## More by Esther Perel > [Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not liking the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longings-that-are-much-more/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [ “For \[erotically intelligent couples\], love is a vessel that contains both security and adventure, and commitment offers one of the great luxuries of life:… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/for-erotically-intelligent-couples-love-is-a-vessel-that-contains/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [It’s hard to feel attracted to someone who has abandoned her sense of autonomy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-s-hard-to-feel-attracted-to-someone-who-has-abandoned-her-sense-of/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [For some people, a one-night stand doesn't make any difference in a seven-year love affair. I don't believe the degree of betrayal is always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/for-some-people-a-one-night-stand-doesn-t-make-any-difference-in-a/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [I want to engage people in an honest, enlightened, and provocative conversation about the nature of erotic desire and the intricacies of intimacy and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/i-want-to-engage-people-in-an-honest-enlightened-and-provocative/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“The quality of your life ultimately depends on the quality of your relationships . . . which are basically a reflection of your sense…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/the-quality-of-your-life-ultimately-depends-on-the-quality-of-your/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given-up-too-many-parts-of/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/i-regret-to-say-that-we-of-the-fbi-are-powerless-to-act-in-cases-of/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [You never know your partner as well as you think.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/you-never-know-your-partner-as-well-as-you-think/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [On some level we trade passion for security, that's trading one illusion for another. It's a matter of degree. We can't live in constant…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/on-some-level-we-trade-passion-for-security-that-s-trading-one/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“When the impulse to share becomes obligatory, when personal boundaries are no longer respected, when only the shared space of togetherness is acknowledged and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/when-the-impulse-to-share-becomes-obligatory-when-personal-boundaries/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“I do believe that the emphasis on egalitarian and respectful sex—purged of any expressions of power, aggression, and transgression—is antithetical to erotic desire for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/i-do-believe-that-the-emphasis-on-egalitarian-and-respectful-sex/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“If intimacy grows through repetition and familiarity, eroticism is numbed by repetition. It thrives on the mysterious, the novel, and the unexpected. Love is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/if-intimacy-grows-through-repetition-and-familiarity-eroticism-is/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“She’s beautiful, too, did I mention that? She lives the life I didn’t live. I feel middle-age and middle-class around her. Nothing wrong with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/she-s-beautiful-too-did-i-mention-that-she-lives-the-life-i-didn-t/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [In dating, if you say no, your lover goes on to the next person. In marriage, if you say no, the person stays.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes-on-to-the-next-person-in/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/#itemlist", "name": "10 Persons Quotes By Esther Perel", "numberOfItems": 10, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Today, monogamy is one person at a time.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Today, monogamy is one person at a time.” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "It's our imagination that's responsible for love, not the other person.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible-for-love-not-the-other-person/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/esther-perel-3265_imagination_it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible_374194.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/esther-perel-3265_imagination_it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible_374194.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/esther-perel-3265_imagination_it-s-our-imagination-that-s-responsible_374194.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“It's our imagination that's responsible for love, not the other person.” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-the-person-we-are-with-as-we/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80b/esther-perel-3265_inspirational_it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-t_2440686.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80b/esther-perel-3265_inspirational_it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-t_2440686.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80b/esther-perel-3265_inspirational_it-isn-t-so-much-that-we-want-to-leave-t_2440686.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "In dating, if you say no, your lover goes on to the next person. In marriage, if you say no, the person stays.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes-on-to-the-next-person-in/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4db/esther-perel-3265_dating_in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes_188244.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4db/esther-perel-3265_dating_in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes_188244.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4db/esther-perel-3265_dating_in-dating-if-you-say-no-your-lover-goes_188244.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“In dating, if you say no, your lover goes on to the next person. In marriage, if you say no, the person stays.” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When we seek the gaze of another, it isn't always our partner we're turning away from, but the person we have ourselves become.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn-t-always-our-partner-we-re/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/157/esther-perel-3265_gaze_when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn_386300.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/157/esther-perel-3265_gaze_when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn_386300.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/157/esther-perel-3265_gaze_when-we-seek-the-gaze-of-another-it-isn_386300.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When we seek the gaze of another, it isn't always our partner we're turning away from, but the person we…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 6, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day you will end up looking for another person in order to reconnect with those lost parts.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given-up-too-many-parts-of/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/03a/esther-perel-3265_ends_if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given_81226.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/03a/esther-perel-3265_ends_if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given_81226.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/03a/esther-perel-3265_ends_if-you-start-to-feel-that-you-have-given_81226.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Success, to me, is helping one person or many people counter the isolation and pseudoconnectivity of our lives by boosting their ability to connect to themselves and to others.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-many-people-counter-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7b/esther-perel-3265_ability_success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-m_492710.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7b/esther-perel-3265_ability_success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-m_492710.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7b/esther-perel-3265_ability_success-to-me-is-helping-one-person-or-m_492710.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Success, to me, is helping one person or many people counter the isolation and pseudoconnectivity of our…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and continuity. At the same time, we expect our committed relationships to be romantic as well as emotionally and sexually fulfilling. Is it any wonder that so many relationships crumble under the weight of it all?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-what-an-entire-village-once/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d8/esther-perel-3265_committed_today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-w_1932487.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d8/esther-perel-3265_committed_today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-w_1932487.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d8/esther-perel-3265_committed_today-we-turn-to-one-person-to-provide-w_1932487.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not liking the one you are with; you are not liking the person you have become.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longings-that-are-much-more/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14a/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longin_7823.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14a/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longin_7823.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14a/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longin_7823.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are looking for another self. It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Esther Perel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because-we-are-looking-for-another/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/414/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because_1400835.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/414/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because_1400835.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/414/esther-perel-3265_elsewhere_very-often-we-don-t-go-elsewhere-because_1400835.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are…” — Esther Perel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/", "name": "Persons Quotes by Esther Perel", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/144/esther-perel-3265_monogamy_today-monogamy-is-one-person-at-a-time-1_1236514.png" }, "description": "10 Persons quotes by Esther Perel. Plus more from Esther Perel and more Persons sayings from other authors.", "breadcrumb": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/#breadcrumb" } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/#breadcrumb", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Topics", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Persons", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "name": "Esther Perel", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/esther-perel/" } ] }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```