---
title: "14 Persons Quotes By Demetri Martin"
description: "14 Persons quotes by Demetri Martin. Plus more from Demetri Martin and more Persons sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg"
---

> [As a creative person, you want to have a foothold and sense of progress.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a-foothold-and-sense-of-progress/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg)

> [If you have a lair then you are probably not a good person.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably-not-a-good-person/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dd9/demetri-martin-511_good-person_if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably_1447484.jpg)

> [Suicide is the #1 killer of a person who is in a boat and happens to be passing under a bridge at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who-is-in-a-boat-and-happens-to/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/demetri-martin-511_boat_suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who_2901459.jpg)

> [In America, one sure sign of success is the presence of an unnecessary waterfall in a person's yard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-the-presence-of-an-unnecessary/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b21/demetri-martin-511_america_in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-t_2112145.jpg)

> [I wonder if it's rude for a deaf person to talk with food in their hands.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person-to-talk-with-food-in-their/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78c/demetri-martin-511_deaf_i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person_1261581.jpg)

> [I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sport-where-you-can-throw/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f1/demetri-martin-511_frisbee_i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sp_1833535.jpg)

> [A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-everything-except-for-how/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/187/demetri-martin-511_annoying_a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-ever_3046647.jpg)

> [If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-intestines-out-from-end-to-end/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a9/demetri-martin-511_average_if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-in_773455.jpg)

> [“Fact: The plastic knife is perfect for when a person just wants to make some marks on his food and get insanely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-when-a-person-just-wants-to/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/099/demetri-martin-511_food_fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-wh_741172.jpg)

> [I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much-as-your-average-person-who-is/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d39/demetri-martin-511_average_i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much_79051.jpg)

> [I want to get the joke to work without having to put any words or to say anything. I just want the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-having-to-put-any-words-or-to/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b60/demetri-martin-511_brain_i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-h_1519706.jpg)

> [When I used to go on the Wikipedia page, and I haven't gone on the page in a while, there used to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page-and-i-haven-t-gone-on-the/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7a/demetri-martin-511_cousin_when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page_1458155.jpg)

> [When there's someone who's dead and then someone does something that that person would not have liked, they say that that person…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then-someone-does-something-that/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bad/demetri-martin-511_corpses_when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then_512011.jpg)

> [Skiing is my favorite sport, because, that's the only sport that is actually better to watch the worst the person is at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that-s-the-only-sport-that-is/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/043/demetri-martin-511_comedy_skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that_69854.jpg)

## Other authors on Persons

## More by Demetri Martin

> [I think hair gel was invented to make it easier to identify assholes from a distance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-think-hair-gel-was-invented-to-make-it-easier-to-identify-assholes/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [Tic Tacs are the maracas of breath mints.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/tic-tacs-are-the-maracas-of-breath-mints/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [When someone describes themself as a taxpayer, they're about to be an asshole.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/when-someone-describes-themself-as-a-taxpayer-they-re-about-to-be-an/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [I think they named the orange before the carrot.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-think-they-named-the-orange-before-the-carrot/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [I like to go to concerts because I love to see my favorite band through the phone of the asshole who's standing in front…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-like-to-go-to-concerts-because-i-love-to-see-my-favorite-band/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/how-fast-does-a-zebra-have-to-run-before-it-looks-gray/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [Skiing is my favorite sport, because, that's the only sport that is actually better to watch the worst the person is at it. "That…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that-s-the-only-sport-that-is/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Grateful Dead.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much-as-your-average-person-who-is/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [Never be less interesting than your refrigerator magnets.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/never-be-less-interesting-than-your-refrigerator-magnets/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-bought-a-cactus-a-week-later-it-died-and-i-got-depressed-because-i/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [A Wednesday with no rain is a dry hump day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/a-wednesday-with-no-rain-is-a-dry-hump-day/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [THING TO TRY: If you are asked to describe a suspect to a police sketch artist, describe in precise detail, the features of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/thing-to-try-if-you-are-asked-to-describe-a-suspect-to-a-police/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [If you happen to catch on fire during the show, do not panic or wave your arms around or scream or we wil give…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/if-you-happen-to-catch-on-fire-during-the-show-do-not-panic-or-wave/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [They say that structure is freedom, and in a sense it is. When you're dealing with multiple constraints, you have to figure out what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/they-say-that-structure-is-freedom-and-in-a-sense-it-is-when-you-re/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

> [I think my favorite sound is the sound of someone not playing the bongos.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-think-my-favorite-sound-is-the-sound-of-someone-not-playing-the/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "ItemList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/#itemlist",
            "name": "14 Persons Quotes By Demetri Martin",
            "numberOfItems": 14,
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "As a creative person, you want to have a foothold and sense of progress.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a-foothold-and-sense-of-progress/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“As a creative person, you want to have a foothold and sense of progress.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you have a lair then you are probably not a good person.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably-not-a-good-person/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dd9/demetri-martin-511_good-person_if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably_1447484.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dd9/demetri-martin-511_good-person_if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably_1447484.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dd9/demetri-martin-511_good-person_if-you-have-a-lair-then-you-are-probably_1447484.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you have a lair then you are probably not a good person.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Suicide is the #1 killer of a person who is in a boat and happens to be passing under a bridge at the wrong time.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who-is-in-a-boat-and-happens-to/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/demetri-martin-511_boat_suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who_2901459.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/demetri-martin-511_boat_suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who_2901459.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/demetri-martin-511_boat_suicide-is-the-1-killer-of-a-person-who_2901459.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Suicide is the #1 killer of a person who is in a boat and happens to be passing under a bridge at the wrong…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "In America, one sure sign of success is the presence of an unnecessary waterfall in a person's yard.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-the-presence-of-an-unnecessary/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b21/demetri-martin-511_america_in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-t_2112145.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b21/demetri-martin-511_america_in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-t_2112145.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b21/demetri-martin-511_america_in-america-one-sure-sign-of-success-is-t_2112145.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“In America, one sure sign of success is the presence of an unnecessary waterfall in a person's yard.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I wonder if it's rude for a deaf person to talk with food in their hands.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person-to-talk-with-food-in-their/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78c/demetri-martin-511_deaf_i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person_1261581.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78c/demetri-martin-511_deaf_i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person_1261581.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78c/demetri-martin-511_deaf_i-wonder-if-it-s-rude-for-a-deaf-person_1261581.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I wonder if it's rude for a deaf person to talk with food in their hands.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 6,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sport-where-you-can-throw/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f1/demetri-martin-511_frisbee_i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sp_1833535.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f1/demetri-martin-511_frisbee_i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sp_1833535.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f1/demetri-martin-511_frisbee_i-like-playing-frisbee-it-is-the-only-sp_1833535.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I like playing frisbee. It is the only sport where you can throw something at a person and it's okay.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 7,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-everything-except-for-how/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/187/demetri-martin-511_annoying_a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-ever_3046647.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/187/demetri-martin-511_annoying_a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-ever_3046647.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/187/demetri-martin-511_annoying_a-know-it-all-is-a-person-who-knows-ever_3046647.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 8,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-intestines-out-from-end-to-end/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a9/demetri-martin-511_average_if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-in_773455.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a9/demetri-martin-511_average_if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-in_773455.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a9/demetri-martin-511_average_if-you-stretched-the-average-person-s-in_773455.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 9,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Fact: The plastic knife is perfect for when a person just wants to make some marks on his food and get insanely frustrated at the same time.”",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-when-a-person-just-wants-to/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/099/demetri-martin-511_food_fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-wh_741172.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/099/demetri-martin-511_food_fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-wh_741172.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/099/demetri-martin-511_food_fact-the-plastic-knife-is-perfect-for-wh_741172.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Fact: The plastic knife is perfect for when a person just wants to make some marks on his food and get…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 10,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Grateful Dead.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much-as-your-average-person-who-is/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d39/demetri-martin-511_average_i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much_79051.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d39/demetri-martin-511_average_i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much_79051.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d39/demetri-martin-511_average_i-know-about-woodstock-probably-as-much_79051.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 11,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I want to get the joke to work without having to put any words or to say anything. I just want the person to look at it, and quietly in their brain, they can just put it together and say, \"Cool, that one works\".",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-having-to-put-any-words-or-to/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b60/demetri-martin-511_brain_i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-h_1519706.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b60/demetri-martin-511_brain_i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-h_1519706.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b60/demetri-martin-511_brain_i-want-to-get-the-joke-to-work-without-h_1519706.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I want to get the joke to work without having to put any words or to say anything. I just want the person to…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 12,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "When I used to go on the Wikipedia page, and I haven't gone on the page in a while, there used to be some guy who was doing my page and he would say that he was my cousin and I was going to be doing projects with him. I don't know who this person is and I don't have a cousin by this name and this person keeps saying that they're doing projects with me. It's so weird.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page-and-i-haven-t-gone-on-the/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7a/demetri-martin-511_cousin_when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page_1458155.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7a/demetri-martin-511_cousin_when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page_1458155.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7a/demetri-martin-511_cousin_when-i-used-to-go-on-the-wikipedia-page_1458155.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“When I used to go on the Wikipedia page, and I haven't gone on the page in a while, there used to be some…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 13,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "When there's someone who's dead and then someone does something that that person would not have liked, they say that that person is spinning in their grave. But I don't understand why they say that. Why is spinning the way that a corpse shows disapproval?",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then-someone-does-something-that/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bad/demetri-martin-511_corpses_when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then_512011.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bad/demetri-martin-511_corpses_when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then_512011.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bad/demetri-martin-511_corpses_when-there-s-someone-who-s-dead-and-then_512011.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“When there's someone who's dead and then someone does something that that person would not have liked, they…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 14,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Skiing is my favorite sport, because, that's the only sport that is actually better to watch the worst the person is at it. \"That guy won a gold medal in the Olympics\" \"Oh yeah, that's cool, i wanna watch the fat guy\" \"Come on dude, you can take that hill\"",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Demetri Martin"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that-s-the-only-sport-that-is/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/043/demetri-martin-511_comedy_skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that_69854.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/043/demetri-martin-511_comedy_skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that_69854.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/043/demetri-martin-511_comedy_skiing-is-my-favorite-sport-because-that_69854.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Skiing is my favorite sport, because, that's the only sport that is actually better to watch the worst the…” — Demetri Martin",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "CollectionPage",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/#webpage",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/",
            "name": "Persons Quotes by Demetri Martin",
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "mainEntity": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/#itemlist"
            },
            "primaryImageOfPage": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7dd/demetri-martin-511_creative_as-a-creative-person-you-want-to-have-a_1700285.jpg"
            },
            "description": "14 Persons quotes by Demetri Martin. Plus more from Demetri Martin and more Persons sayings from other authors.",
            "breadcrumb": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/#breadcrumb"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/#breadcrumb",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Topics",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Persons",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "name": "Demetri Martin",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/persons/demetri-martin/"
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```