--- title: "9 Oh my god Quotes By John Green" description: "9 Oh my god quotes by John Green. Plus more from John Green and more Oh my god sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91f/john-green-12_banana_oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana-1234087_1234087.jpg" --- > [“Oh my god, I am a banana.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91f/john-green-12_banana_oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana-1234087_1234087.jpg) > [“Oh my God I'm going to kill you!' But she was laughing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/oh-my-god-i-m-going-to-kill-you-but-she-was-laughing/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/270/john-green-12_kill-you_oh-my-god-i-m-going-to-kill-you-but-she_2183313.jpg) > [“Comment dis-tu 'Oh my God, I don't know nearly enough French to pass French II' en français? ”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/comment-dis-tu-oh-my-god-i-don-t-know-nearly-enough-french-to-pass/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a15/john-green-12_french_comment-dis-tu-oh-my-god-i-don-t-know-ne_2800592.jpg) > [Tell me my copy is missing the last twenty pages or something. Hazel Grace, tell me I have not reached the end…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/tell-me-my-copy-is-missing-the-last-twenty-pages-or-something-hazel/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f7/john-green-12_augustus_tell-me-my-copy-is-missing-the-last-twen_2006655.jpg) > [It's like people believe all you need to do is like the same bands in order to be soulmates. Or book. Oh…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/it-s-like-people-believe-all-you-need-to-do-is-like-the-same-bands-in/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/af0/john-green-12_band_it-s-like-people-believe-all-you-need-to_400308.jpg) > [“Oh my God. I've seen him at parties. The things I would do to that boy. I mean, not now that I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/oh-my-god-i-ve-seen-him-at-parties-the-things-i-would-do-to-that-boy/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c98/john-green-12_john-green_oh-my-god-i-ve-seen-him-at-parties-the-t_2249848.jpg) > [“The problem exactly is that she dumped me. That I'm alone. Oh my God, I'm alone again. And not only that, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/the-problem-exactly-is-that-she-dumped-me-that-i-m-alone-oh-my-god-i/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f9f/john-green-12_dumped_the-problem-exactly-is-that-she-dumped-m_375445.jpg) > [“When I got out of the movie, I had four text messages from Augustus. Tell me my copy is missing the last…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-text-messages-from-augustus/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/john-green-12_an-imperial-afflicti_when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-t_612457.jpg) > [“You were with Margo Roth Spiegelman last night? At THREE A.M.? I nodded. Alone? I nodded. Oh my God, if you hooked…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/you-were-with-margo-roth-spiegelman-last-night-at-three-a-m-i-nodded/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/john-green-12_boobs_you-were-with-margo-roth-spiegelman-last_1269008.jpg) ## Other authors on Oh my god ## More by John Green > [Issac:"I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters." Computer: "I don't understand-" Issac: "Me neither. Pause](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/issac-i-dislike-living-in-a-world-without-augustus-waters-computer-i/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“I just want to stay away from people and read books and think”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-just-want-to-stay-away-from-people-and-read-books-and-think/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [She smiled with all the delight of a kid on Christmas morning and said, "Y'all smoke to enjoy it. I smoke to die." -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/she-smiled-with-all-the-delight-of-a-kid-on-christmas-morning-and/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [A Margo for each of us--and each more mirror than window.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/a-margo-for-each-of-us-and-each-more-mirror-than-window/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“No one ever says good-bye unless they want to see you again.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/no-one-ever-says-good-bye-unless-they-want-to-see-you-again/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Neither novels or their readers benefit from any attempts to divine whether any facts hide inside a story. Such efforts attack the very idea…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/neither-novels-or-their-readers-benefit-from-any-attempts-to-divine/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“Traffic's not too bad on Sheridan, and I'm cornering the car like it's the Indy 500, and we're listening to my favorite NMH song,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/traffic-s-not-too-bad-on-sheridan-and-i-m-cornering-the-car-like-it-s/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“Praise God for good nurses.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/praise-god-for-good-nurses/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [So I was ugly. I was never fat, really, and I never wore headgear or had zits or anything. But I was ugly. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/so-i-was-ugly-i-was-never-fat-really-and-i-never-wore-headgear-or-had/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Nothing has ever looked like that ever in all of human history.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/nothing-has-ever-looked-like-that-ever-in-all-of-human-history/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“said to him quietly, as if I couldn’t hear or something. Dad was about to respond but I interrupted.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/said-to-him-quietly-as-if-i-couldn-t-hear-or-something-dad-was-about/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I believe humans have souls, and I believe in the conservation of souls.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-believe-humans-have-souls-and-i-believe-in-the-conservation-of-souls/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [“He was hot. A nonhotboy stares at you relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of assault. But a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/he-was-hot-a-nonhotboy-stares-at-you-relentlessly-and-it-is-at-best/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [I think if you keep the box closed long enough you do kill the cat, actually.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/i-think-if-you-keep-the-box-closed-long-enough-you-do-kill-the-cat/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) > [Imagining the future is a kind of nostalgia. (...) You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you'll escape it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/imagining-the-future-is-a-kind-of-nostalgia-you-spend-your-whole-life/) [John Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-green/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/oh-my-god/john-green/#itemlist", "name": "9 Oh my god Quotes By John Green", "numberOfItems": 9, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Oh my god, I am a banana.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "John Green" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91f/john-green-12_banana_oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana-1234087_1234087.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91f/john-green-12_banana_oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana-1234087_1234087.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91f/john-green-12_banana_oh-my-god-i-am-a-banana-1234087_1234087.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Oh my god, I am a banana.” — John Green", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Oh my God I'm going to kill you!' 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Hope all’s okay.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "John Green" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-green/when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-text-messages-from-augustus/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/john-green-12_an-imperial-afflicti_when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-t_612457.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/john-green-12_an-imperial-afflicti_when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-t_612457.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/john-green-12_an-imperial-afflicti_when-i-got-out-of-the-movie-i-had-four-t_612457.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When I got out of the movie, I had four text messages from Augustus. Tell me my copy is missing the last…” — John Green", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You were with Margo Roth Spiegelman last night? At THREE A.M.? I nodded. Alone? I nodded. Oh my God, if you hooked up with her, you have to tell me every single thing that happened. You have to write me a term paper on the look and feel of Margo Roth Spiegelman's breasts. Thrity pages, minimum! I want you to do a photo-realistic pencil drawing. A sculpture would also be acceptable. I was wondering if it would be possible for you to write a sestina about Margo Roth Spiegelman's breasts? Your six words are: pink, round, firmness, succulent, supple, and pillowy. 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