---
title: "58 Muffin Quotes by 50 authors"
description: "Browse 58 Muffin quotes by 50 authors. Discover the best Muffin sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ffd/anonymous-1_food_do-you-know-the-muffin-man-2747019_2747019.jpg"
---

> [Do you know the muffin man!!!!!!!!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/do-you-know-the-muffin-man/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ffd/anonymous-1_food_do-you-know-the-muffin-man-2747019_2747019.jpg)

> [Peel your muffin cap back blue](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-hart/peel-your-muffin-cap-back-blue/)

[Kevin Hart](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-hart/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0c/kevin-hart-506_food_peel-your-muffin-cap-back-blue-3056452_3056452.jpg)

> [Muffin's hubby &lt;3 love ya babe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathan/muffin-s-hubby-3-love-ya-babe/)

[Nathan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f7b/nathan-52624_love_muffin-s-hubby-3-love-ya-babe-756318_756318.jpg)

> [Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-mochrie/give-me-liberty-or-a-bran-muffin/)

[Colin Mochrie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-mochrie/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f34/colin-mochrie-9765_freedom_give-me-liberty-or-a-bran-muffin-1814989_1814989.jpg)

> [“What's a miffin?" "Trippy muffin.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-roux/what-s-a-miffin-trippy-muffin/)

[Abigail Roux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-roux/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/898/abigail-roux-1114_quote_what-s-a-miffin-trippy-muffin-1769282_1769282.jpg)

> [Swagga Muffin haha :D](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/savannah-j/swagga-muffin-haha-d/)

[Savannah J](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/savannah-j/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c49/savannah-j-1369_quote_swagga-muffin-haha-d-1649835_1649835.jpg)

> [The Muffin Man :')](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jazzy/the-muffin-man/)

[Jazzy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jazzy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14c/jazzy-1508_food_the-muffin-man-2577121_2577121.jpg)

> [“Death by muffin.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-roux/death-by-muffin/)

[Abigail Roux](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-roux/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/abigail-roux-1114_quote_death-by-muffin-857180_857180.jpg)

> [“A muffin what? Are you asking me to eat you or something?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-muffin-what-are-you-asking-me-to-eat-you-or-something/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/df1/anonymous-1_humor_a-muffin-what-are-you-asking-me-to-eat-y_1765065.jpg)

> [I ain't gonna pay no dollar for a corn muffin that's half dough.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-kling/i-ain-t-gonna-pay-no-dollar-for-a-corn-muffin-that-s-half-dough/)

[Kevin Kling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-kling/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/826/kevin-kling-63454_corn_i-ain-t-gonna-pay-no-dollar-for-a-corn-m_1194691.jpg)

> [I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dane-cook/i-can-t-do-anything-i-can-t-even-have-an-english-muffin/)

[Dane Cook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dane-cook/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a96/dane-cook-1394_english_i-can-t-do-anything-i-can-t-even-have-an_702194.png)

> [Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-evanovich/its-always-nice-to-have-a-stud-muffin-at-the-table/)

[Janet Evanovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-evanovich/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d4a/janet-evanovich-291_food_its-always-nice-to-have-a-stud-muffin-at_2460670.png)

> [“I am going to shoot a muffin of Marlean's head.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/i-am-going-to-shoot-a-muffin-of-marlean-s-head/)

[Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a2/veronica-roth-66_muffin_i-am-going-to-shoot-a-muffin-of-marlean_783754.png)

> [A cupcake is just a muffin with clown puke topping.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-brooker/a-cupcake-is-just-a-muffin-with-clown-puke-topping/)

[Charlie Brooker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-brooker/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d0e/charlie-brooker-1392_clown_a-cupcake-is-just-a-muffin-with-clown-pu_2193928.png)

> [You're my muffin, in a world full of cupcakes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chloe/you-re-my-muffin-in-a-world-full-of-cupcakes/)

[Chloe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chloe/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e88/chloe-18043_cupcakes_you-re-my-muffin-in-a-world-full-of-cupc_646640.jpg)

> [Any cupcake consumed before 9AM is, technically, a muffin.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-p-cleary/any-cupcake-consumed-before-9am-is-technically-a-muffin/)

[Brian P. Cleary](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-p-cleary/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64c/brian-p-cleary-28429_cupcake_any-cupcake-consumed-before-9am-is-techn_144784.png)

> [“LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE UNHAPPY...SO LAUGH INSANELY, KISS SOFTLY, AND MAKE LOVE PASSIONATELY…”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/muffin/life-is-too-short-to-be-unhappy-so-laugh-insanely-kiss-softly-and/)

[Muffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/muffin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/26a/muffin-94776_arsonist_life-is-too-short-to-be-unhappy-so-laugh_218399.jpg)

> [“Every time I eat an English muffin I feel like I become more grammatically correct, more refined, more cultured, and an all-around…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jarod-kintz/every-time-i-eat-an-english-muffin-i-feel-like-i-become-more/)

[Jarod Kintz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jarod-kintz/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/432/jarod-kintz-2_time_every-time-i-eat-an-english-muffin-i-fee_1463490.jpg)

> [Two old Bachelors were living in one house; One caught a Muffin, the other caught a Mouse.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edward-lear/two-old-bachelors-were-living-in-one-house-one-caught-a-muffin-the/)

[Edward Lear](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edward-lear/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d4/edward-lear-14704_bachelors_two-old-bachelors-were-living-in-one-hou_2718167.png)

> [“Westerners drop / I love you’s / into conversation / like blueberries / hitting soft muffin dough / I convert it to shillings / wince.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shailja-patel/westerners-drop-i-love-you-s-into-conversation-like-blueberries/)

[Shailja Patel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shailja-patel/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2cc/shailja-patel-54322_class_westerners-drop-i-love-you-s-into-conver_2760648.jpg)

> [If I'm ever lucky enough to be part of an awards tribute, I hope they play 'Muffin Top' in my little clip.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-krakowski/if-i-m-ever-lucky-enough-to-be-part-of-an-awards-tribute-i-hope-they/)

[Jane Krakowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-krakowski/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/jane-krakowski-21136_awards_if-i-m-ever-lucky-enough-to-be-part-of-a_2131912.jpg)

> [I believe the world to be a muffin pan, and there certainly are a lot of muffins here.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aaron-funk/i-believe-the-world-to-be-a-muffin-pan-and-there-certainly-are-a-lot/)

[Aaron Funk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aaron-funk/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/494/aaron-funk-63583_believe_i-believe-the-world-to-be-a-muffin-pan-a_902904.jpg)

> [Red flag of the eating disorder: the muffin. Keep your eye on the ladies with the muffins...and sometimes I'll just eat the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janeane-garofalo/red-flag-of-the-eating-disorder-the-muffin-keep-your-eye-on-the/)

[Janeane Garofalo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janeane-garofalo/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ec/janeane-garofalo-1940_disorder_red-flag-of-the-eating-disorder-the-muff_862579.png)

> [“He needed to pick one muffin, and stick with that muffin. He didn’t get to lay claim to all the muffins, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/penny-reid/he-needed-to-pick-one-muffin-and-stick-with-that-muffin-he-didn-t-get/)

[Penny Reid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/penny-reid/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ee/penny-reid-1063_life_he-needed-to-pick-one-muffin-and-stick-w_2088108.jpg)

> [One of the best things Gwyneth Paltrow has done in years was her mesmerized, good-sport cameo in a 'Pootie' sketch, when she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elvis-mitchell/one-of-the-best-things-gwyneth-paltrow-has-done-in-years-was-her/)

[Elvis Mitchell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elvis-mitchell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/28e/elvis-mitchell-2864_best_one-of-the-best-things-gwyneth-paltrow-h_2275300.jpg)

> [When it comes to breakfast, baked goods are my weakness (besides coffee): toast, croissants, heck, even a scone on the weekend. There…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-morocco/when-it-comes-to-breakfast-baked-goods-are-my-weakness-besides-coffee/)

[Chris Morocco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-morocco/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/460/chris-morocco-6357_baked-goods_when-it-comes-to-breakfast-baked-goods-a_1666394.jpg)

> [“Percy inhaled the muffin. The coffee was great. Now, Percy thought, if he could just get a shower, a change of clothes,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-riordan/percy-inhaled-the-muffin-the-coffee-was-great-now-percy-thought-if-he/)

[Rick Riordan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-riordan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/abe/rick-riordan-27_coffee_percy-inhaled-the-muffin-the-coffee-was_483873.jpg)

> [Brioches are a light, pale yellow, faintly sweet kind of muffin with a characteristic blob on top, rather like a mushroom just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-f-k-fisher/brioches-are-a-light-pale-yellow-faintly-sweet-kind-of-muffin-with-a/)

[M. F. K. Fisher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-f-k-fisher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ec/m-f-k-fisher-7947_baking_brioches-are-a-light-pale-yellow-faintly_2407503.png)

> [“So, what do you say? Want to be my date for what is absolutely guaranteed to be a miserable evening—and before you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susannah-nix/so-what-do-you-say-want-to-be-my-date-for-what-is-absolutely/)

[Susannah Nix](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susannah-nix/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/52e/susannah-nix-59435_dating_so-what-do-you-say-want-to-be-my-date-fo_2325639.jpg)

> [“I can't, Muffin. I can't talk to him. Why? He was good enough to sleep with, but not good enough to talk…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-myles/i-can-t-muffin-i-can-t-talk-to-him-why-he-was-good-enough-to-sleep/)

[Jill Myles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-myles/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4fa/jill-myles-29808_good-enough_i-can-t-muffin-i-can-t-talk-to-him-why-h_1754369.jpg)

> [Some people... some people like cupcakes Exclusively, while myself, I say, There is naught nor ought there be nothing So exalted on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-zappa/some-people-some-people-like-cupcakes-exclusively-while-myself-i-say/)

[Frank Zappa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-zappa/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b32/frank-zappa-702_cupcakes_some-people-some-people-like-cupcakes-ex_2897205.jpg)

> [After the woman left, I set my coffee down and opened the bag. Two muffins-double-chocolate and blueberry bran. I texted Adam a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kelley-armstrong/after-the-woman-left-i-set-my-coffee-down-and-opened-the-bag-two/)

[Kelley Armstrong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kelley-armstrong/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1de/kelley-armstrong-581_adam_after-the-woman-left-i-set-my-coffee-dow_882094.png)

> [“Come on, let’s go! Move your butter muffin butt!” “My what?” Mary asked with a surprised look. “Butter muffin butt,” Aja said…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-renee-wyatt/come-on-let-s-go-move-your-butter-muffin-butt-my-what-mary-asked-with/)

[Nicole Renee Wyatt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-renee-wyatt/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/731/nicole-renee-wyatt-66848_butter_come-on-let-s-go-move-your-butter-muffin_2569455.jpg)

> [“This is heaven- sunshine, coffee, and muffin." "You're so different from everyone else," he teased. "How so?" she asked, and took another…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lynne-ewing/this-is-heaven-sunshine-coffee-and-muffin-you-re-so-different-from/)

[Lynne Ewing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lynne-ewing/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da0/lynne-ewing-31271_adventure_this-is-heaven-sunshine-coffee-and-muffi_3058132.jpg)

> [“I have this recurring nightmare in which I have to move back in with my old college roommates. I'll admit, that's what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-vowell/i-have-this-recurring-nightmare-in-which-i-have-to-move-back-in-with/)

[Sarah Vowell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-vowell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ce/sarah-vowell-2016_car-dealer_i-have-this-recurring-nightmare-in-which_672737.jpg)

> [There are forces working in the world as never before in the history of mankind for standardization, for the regimentation of us…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/madeleine-l-engle/there-are-forces-working-in-the-world-as-never-before-in-the-history/)

[Madeleine L'Engle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/madeleine-l-engle/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac6/madeleine-l-engle-345_capable_there-are-forces-working-in-the-world-as_184108.jpg)

> [“I reached into my bag and pulled out a pumpkin spice muffin with walnuts that was as moist as anything. "It can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-bauer/i-reached-into-my-bag-and-pulled-out-a-pumpkin-spice-muffin-with/)

[Joan Bauer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-bauer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78d/joan-bauer-3032_cream-cheese_i-reached-into-my-bag-and-pulled-out-a-p_1072989.png)

> [I wished that my job was baking muffins in a muffin shop, where all I'd have to do was crack eggs and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-weiner/i-wished-that-my-job-was-baking-muffins-in-a-muffin-shop-where-all-i/)

[Jennifer Weiner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-weiner/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e7f/jennifer-weiner-2358_abuse_i-wished-that-my-job-was-baking-muffins_1794076.png)

> [Give me liberty or give me a bran muffin!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colin-mochrie/give-me-liberty-or-give-me-a-bran-muffin/)

[Colin Mochrie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colin-mochrie/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ca7/colin-mochrie-9765_freedom_give-me-liberty-or-give-me-a-bran-muffin_2237254.jpg)

> [I'm going to shoot a muffin off Marlene's head.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/i-m-going-to-shoot-a-muffin-off-marlene-s-head/)

[Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c8b/veronica-roth-66_muffin_i-m-going-to-shoot-a-muffin-off-marlene_2227081.png)

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                        "text": "Swagga Muffin haha :D",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I am going to shoot a muffin of Marlean's head.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "A cupcake is just a muffin with clown puke topping.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE UNHAPPY...SO LAUGH INSANELY, KISS SOFTLY, AND MAKE LOVE PASSIONATELY…”",
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                        "text": "“Westerners drop / I love you’s / into conversation / like blueberries / hitting soft muffin dough / I convert it to shillings / wince.”",
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                        "text": "If I'm ever lucky enough to be part of an awards tribute, I hope they play 'Muffin Top' in my little clip. That's how I want to be remembered.",
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                        "text": "I believe the world to be a muffin pan, and there certainly are a lot of muffins here.",
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                        "text": "Red flag of the eating disorder: the muffin. Keep your eye on the ladies with the muffins...and sometimes I'll just eat the muffin top.",
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                        "text": "“He needed to pick one muffin, and stick with that muffin. He didn’t get to lay claim to all the muffins, because that’s not how life worked.”",
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                        "text": "One of the best things Gwyneth Paltrow has done in years was her mesmerized, good-sport cameo in a 'Pootie' sketch, when she was melted over him like butter on an English muffin.",
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                        "text": "When it comes to breakfast, baked goods are my weakness (besides coffee): toast, croissants, heck, even a scone on the weekend. There is one bakery item, though, that you will never see in my life, and that's a muffin.",
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                        "text": "“Percy inhaled the muffin. The coffee was great. Now, Percy thought, if he could just get a shower, a change of clothes, and some sleep, he’d be golden. Maybe even Imperial golden.”",
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                        "text": "Brioches are a light, pale yellow, faintly sweet kind of muffin with a characteristic blob on top, rather like a mushroom just pushing crookedly through the ground. Once eaten in Paris, they never taste as good anywhere else.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“So, what do you say? Want to be my date for what is absolutely guaranteed to be a miserable evening—and before you answer, please remember I brought you a muffin.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I can't, Muffin. I can't talk to him. Why? He was good enough to sleep with, but not good enough to talk to now that he know's that you're part fish?”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Some people... some people like cupcakes Exclusively, while myself, I say, There is naught nor ought there be nothing So exalted on the face of god's grey Earth as that prince of foods... the muffin!",
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                        "text": "After the woman left, I set my coffee down and opened the bag. Two muffins-double-chocolate and blueberry bran. I texted Adam a thank-you. I’d just started eating the chocolate muffin when he texted backPut that one down and eat the bran. It’s better foryou.",
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                        "text": "“Come on, let’s go! Move your butter muffin butt!” “My what?” Mary asked with a surprised look. “Butter muffin butt,” Aja said with a smile; her angelic face glowed. “And what is that supposed to mean?” Mary asked as she slid out of the truck seat. Aja wasn’t far behind. “Well, I make it a point to never say curse words, and, well, butter muffin sounds as close to mother effin as I could think of,” she said with an increased sweetness to her voice.”",
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                        "text": "“This is heaven- sunshine, coffee, and muffin.\" \"You're so different from everyone else,\" he teased. \"How so?\" she asked, and took another eager bite. \"Other girls are so worried about the way they look.\" \"What?\" She sprayed out part of the muffin and coffee. \"What's wrong with the way I look?\" \"Nothing,\" he answered, but there was amusement in his eyes. \"You look great.\" She handed back the muffin and the coffee, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. \"Then why did you say I don't worry about the way I look?\" \"I just mean other girls spend hours in front of the mirror and you obviously don't. You seem like the right kind of person to go on adventures with,\" he answered in a dreamy kind of way. \"That's what I want to do. Go on a dig, maybe. Wouldn't you like to uncover mummies or discover an unknown temple in the jungles of Cambodia?\" \"Why?\" she asked with a rising sense of uneasiness. \"When you're safe and at home, adventures might seem like fun, but when you're living them, they're not.\" \"I thought you'd enjoy roughing it,\" he explained. \"You don't seem to care about appearances.”",
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                        "text": "“I have this recurring nightmare in which I have to move back in with my old college roommates. I'll admit, that's what I was expecting to find at Oneida. The 19th century equivalent of sharing a house with the friend who brought home a crazy drifter to sleep on our couch - a man who claimed the local car dealership was built out of 'needles nourishing the earth'. The week before I went to Oneida, I had that claustrophobic dream again - that I had to move back in with the girl who claimed to enjoy baking and always promised tomorrow was going to be 'Muffin Day!' even though tomorrow was never Muffin Day. It was Muffin Day maybe once.”",
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                        "text": "There are forces working in the world as never before in the history of mankind for standardization, for the regimentation of us all, or what I like to call making muffins of us, muffins all like every other muffin in the muffin tin. This is the limited universe, the drying dissipating universe that we can help our children to avoid by providing them with ‘explosive material capable of stirring up fresh life endlessly'.",
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                        "text": "“I reached into my bag and pulled out a pumpkin spice muffin with walnuts that was as moist as anything. \"It can be plain for breakfast or I can top it with cream cheese frosting. I like a muffin that can go from day to evening.\" I gave it to her. She sniffed it, nodded, and held it up. \"How do I know you're not trying to poison me?\" I wasn't expecting that question. \"Ms. Morningstar, I swear, if I was going to poison you, I wouldn't ruin a perfectly fine muffin to do it.”",
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                        "text": "I wished that my job was baking muffins in a muffin shop, where all I'd have to do was crack eggs and measure flour and make change, and nobody could abuse me, and where they'd even expect me to be fat. Every flab roll and cellulite crinkle would serve as testimony to the excellence of my baked goods",
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                        "text": "Give me liberty or give me a bran muffin!",
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                        "text": "I'm going to shoot a muffin off Marlene's head.",
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