---
title: "1 Minute Half Quotes By Phyllis Diller"
description: "1 Minute Half quotes by Phyllis Diller. Plus more from Phyllis Diller and more Minute Half sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png"
---

> [His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-half/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png)

## More by Phyllis Diller

> [My mother-in-law must be the probation officer I got for the crime I committed of marrying my husband.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/my-mother-in-law-must-be-the-probation-officer-i-got-for-the-crime-i/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I don't know how you feel about old age... but in my case I didn't even see it coming. It hit me from the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-don-t-know-how-you-feel-about-old-age-but-in-my-case-i-didn-t-even/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/if-it-weren-t-for-baseball-many-kids-wouldn-t-know-what-a-millionaire/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-m-the-only-woman-who-can-walk-in-central-park-at-night-and-reduce/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I was the world's ugliest baby. When I was born, the doctor slapped everybody.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-was-the-world-s-ugliest-baby-when-i-was-born-the-doctor-slapped/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/by-far-the-most-common-craving-of-pregnant-women-is-not-to-be-pregnant/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/for-fang-getting-out-of-bed-in-the-morning-is-a-career-move/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/women-want-men-careers-money-children-friends-luxury-comfort/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-admit-i-have-a-tremendous-sex-drive-my-boyfriend-lives-forty-miles/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/the-reason-women-don-t-play-football-is-because-11-of-them-would/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/if-you-don-t-have-wrinkles-you-haven-t-laughed-enough/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [“A smile is a curve that sets things right.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/a-smile-is-a-curve-that-sets-things-right/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Every time I go near the stove, the dog howls.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/every-time-i-go-near-the-stove-the-dog-howls/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Some wives have model husbands, I got one that needed remodeling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/some-wives-have-model-husbands-i-got-one-that-needed-remodeling/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/my-idea-of-exercise-is-a-good-brisk-sit/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "ItemList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/#itemlist",
            "name": "1 Minute Half Quotes By Phyllis Diller",
            "numberOfItems": 1,
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Phyllis Diller"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-half/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.” — Phyllis Diller",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "CollectionPage",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/#webpage",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/",
            "name": "Minute Half Quotes by Phyllis Diller",
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "mainEntity": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/#itemlist"
            },
            "primaryImageOfPage": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d62/phyllis-diller-1622_finest_his-finest-hour-lasted-a-minute-and-a-ha_1321077.png"
            },
            "description": "1 Minute Half quotes by Phyllis Diller. Plus more from Phyllis Diller and more Minute Half sayings from other authors.",
            "breadcrumb": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/#breadcrumb"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/#breadcrumb",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Topics",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Minute Half",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "name": "Phyllis Diller",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/minute-half/phyllis-diller/"
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```