---
title: "4 Lol Quotes By Alan Bradley"
description: "4 Lol quotes by Alan Bradley. Plus more from Alan Bradley and more Lol sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png"
---

> [“I had to make water ” I said. It was the classic female excuse and no male in recorded history had ever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-classic-female-excuse-and-no/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png)

> [“I remembered Father remarking once that if rudeness was not attributable to ignorance it could be taken as a sure sign that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that-if-rudeness-was-not/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/770/alan-bradley-1571_aristocracy_i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that_1437124.png)

> [“I was gazing at a cup of cocoa on my night table. As I focused on the thick brown skin that had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-night-table-as-i-focused-on-the/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f5/alan-bradley-1571_brown-skin_i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-nig_1507780.jpg)

> [“I remembered that Johnson had declared portrait painting to be an improper employment for a woman. “Public practice of any art and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-portrait-painting-to-be-an/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f5/alan-bradley-1571_dr-johnson_i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-p_1593243.jpg)

## Other authors on Lol

## More by Alan Bradley

> [“…it is a well-known fact that more than two men shut up together in an enclosed space for more than an hour constitute a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/it-is-a-well-known-fact-that-more-than-two-men-shut-up-together-in-an/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“You see, Flavia, silence is sometimes the most costly of commodities.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/you-see-flavia-silence-is-sometimes-the-most-costly-of-commodities/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“If there is a thing I truly despise, it is being addressed as "dearie." When I write my magnum opus, A Treatise Upon All…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/if-there-is-a-thing-i-truly-despise-it-is-being-addressed-as-dearie/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“The sweater didn't fit me, of course. Even with the sleeves rolled up I looked like a baggy monkey picking bananas. But to my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/the-sweater-didn-t-fit-me-of-course-even-with-the-sleeves-rolled-up-i/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“If there is anything more delicious than a sausage roasted over an open Bunsen burner, I can't image what it might be--Porcelain and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/if-there-is-anything-more-delicious-than-a-sausage-roasted-over-an/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“No point in wasting time with false vanity when you possess the real thing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/no-point-in-wasting-time-with-false-vanity-when-you-possess-the-real/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“Die, witch," I managed, making a cross of my forefingers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/die-witch-i-managed-making-a-cross-of-my-forefingers/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“There was no way out; not, at least, in this direction. I was like a hamster that had climbed to the top of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/there-was-no-way-out-not-at-least-in-this-direction-i-was-like-a/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [I am often thought of as being remarkably bright, and yet my brains, more often than not, are busily devising new and interesting ways…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-am-often-thought-of-as-being-remarkably-bright-and-yet-my-brains/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“To my mind, if Nature had wanted us to have bright red fingertips, She would have caused us to be born with our blood…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/to-my-mind-if-nature-had-wanted-us-to-have-bright-red-fingertips-she/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“Had I been too cruel to that horror, Miss Mountjoy? Too vindictive? Wasn't she, after all, just a harmless and lonely old spinster? Would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/had-i-been-too-cruel-to-that-horror-miss-mountjoy-too-vindictive-wasn/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“This was an interesting thought; it had never occurred to me that one's name could be a compass.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/this-was-an-interesting-thought-it-had-never-occurred-to-me-that-one/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“While you've been gadding about the countryside, we've held a meeting, and we've all of us decided that you must go.' In short, we've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/while-you-ve-been-gadding-about-the-countryside-we-ve-held-a-meeting/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“For all practical purposes, Feely's enthusiasms stopped where her skin ended.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/for-all-practical-purposes-feely-s-enthusiasms-stopped-where-her-skin/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

> [“Then I remembered that silence can sometimes do more damage than words.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/then-i-remembered-that-silence-can-sometimes-do-more-damage-than-words/)

[Alan Bradley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-bradley/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "ItemList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/#itemlist",
            "name": "4 Lol Quotes By Alan Bradley",
            "numberOfItems": 4,
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I had to make water ” I said. It was the classic female excuse and no male in recorded history had ever questioned it. “I see ” the Inspector said and left it at that. Later I would have a quick piddle behind the caravan for insurance purposes. No one would be any the wiser.”",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Alan Bradley"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-classic-female-excuse-and-no/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I had to make water ” I said. It was the classic female excuse and no male in recorded history had ever…” — Alan Bradley",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I remembered Father remarking once that if rudeness was not attributable to ignorance it could be taken as a sure sign that one was speaking to a member of the aristocracy.”",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Alan Bradley"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that-if-rudeness-was-not/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/770/alan-bradley-1571_aristocracy_i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that_1437124.png",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/770/alan-bradley-1571_aristocracy_i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that_1437124.png",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/770/alan-bradley-1571_aristocracy_i-remembered-father-remarking-once-that_1437124.png",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I remembered Father remarking once that if rudeness was not attributable to ignorance it could be taken as a…” — Alan Bradley",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I was gazing at a cup of cocoa on my night table. As I focused on the thick brown skin that had formed upon its surface like ice on a muddy pond something at the root of my tongue leapt like a little goat and my stomach turned over. There are not many things that I despise but chiefest among them is skin on milk. I loathe it with a passion. Not even the thought of the marvelous chemical change that forms the stuff—the milk’s proteins churned and ripped apart by the heat of boiling then reassembling themselves as they cool into a jellied skin—was enough to console me. I would rather eat a cobweb.”",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Alan Bradley"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-night-table-as-i-focused-on-the/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f5/alan-bradley-1571_brown-skin_i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-nig_1507780.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f5/alan-bradley-1571_brown-skin_i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-nig_1507780.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f5/alan-bradley-1571_brown-skin_i-was-gazing-at-a-cup-of-cocoa-on-my-nig_1507780.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I was gazing at a cup of cocoa on my night table. As I focused on the thick brown skin that had formed upon…” — Alan Bradley",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I remembered that Johnson had declared portrait painting to be an improper employment for a woman. “Public practice of any art and staring in men’s faces is very indelicate in a female,” he had said. Well I’d seen Dr. Johnson’s face in the book’s frontispiece and I couldn’t imagine anyone male or female wanting to stare into it for any length of time —the man was an absolute toad.”",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Alan Bradley"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-bradley/i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-portrait-painting-to-be-an/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f5/alan-bradley-1571_dr-johnson_i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-p_1593243.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f5/alan-bradley-1571_dr-johnson_i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-p_1593243.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f5/alan-bradley-1571_dr-johnson_i-remembered-that-johnson-had-declared-p_1593243.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I remembered that Johnson had declared portrait painting to be an improper employment for a woman. “Public…” — Alan Bradley",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "CollectionPage",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/#webpage",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/",
            "name": "Lol Quotes by Alan Bradley",
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "mainEntity": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/#itemlist"
            },
            "primaryImageOfPage": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/222/alan-bradley-1571_flavia_i-had-to-make-water-i-said-it-was-the-cl_1150959.png"
            },
            "description": "4 Lol quotes by Alan Bradley. Plus more from Alan Bradley and more Lol sayings from other authors.",
            "breadcrumb": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/#breadcrumb"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/#breadcrumb",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Topics",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Lol",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "name": "Alan Bradley",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lol/alan-bradley/"
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
