--- title: "17 Laughing Quotes By Joan Rivers" description: "17 Laughing quotes by Joan Rivers. Plus more from Joan Rivers and more Laughing sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68d/joan-rivers-669_diet_on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-wha_908845.png" --- > [On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-what-you-can-spell/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68d/joan-rivers-669_diet_on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-wha_908845.png) > [I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don-t-step-on-my-boobs/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35b/joan-rivers-669_actresses_i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don_1392939.png) > [Life is very tough. If you don't laugh, it's tough.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-is-very-tough-if-you-don-t-laugh-it-s-tough/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2df/joan-rivers-669_comedy_life-is-very-tough-if-you-don-t-laugh-it_2244898.png) > [When you can laugh at yourself no one can ever make a fool of you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/when-you-can-laugh-at-yourself-no-one-can-ever-make-a-fool-of-you/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea3/joan-rivers-669_comedy_when-you-can-laugh-at-yourself-no-one-ca_1773457.png) > [If you laugh at it, you can deal with it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/if-you-laugh-at-it-you-can-deal-with-it/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/154/joan-rivers-669_comedy_if-you-laugh-at-it-you-can-deal-with-it_2492356.png) > [As a wedding gift, Ray J gave Kim Kardashian his profits from their sex tape. It's 'Something Old' as well as 'Something…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/as-a-wedding-gift-ray-j-gave-kim-kardashian-his-profits-from-their/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d72/joan-rivers-669_actresses_as-a-wedding-gift-ray-j-gave-kim-kardash_1356020.png) > [Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/show-business-can-be-an-addiction-an-audience-would-laugh-at-me-one/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/75e/joan-rivers-669_addiction_show-business-can-be-an-addiction-an-aud_1777411.png) > [Russell Brand has announced that he plans to write a series of children's books. First up: 'Horton Hears a Heroin Dealer.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plans-to-write-a-series-of/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4d3/joan-rivers-669_announcements_russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plan_2534224.png) > [Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-is-hard-and-we-better-laugh-at-everything-otherwise-we-re-going/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c02/joan-rivers-669_comedy_life-is-hard-and-we-better-laugh-at-ever_1079186.png) > [I've had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-ve-had-so-much-plastic-surgery-when-i-die-they-will-donate-my-body/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cee/joan-rivers-669_age_i-ve-had-so-much-plastic-surgery-when-i_503079.png) > [We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-comics-we-are-here-to-make-you/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4a3/joan-rivers-669_apologize_we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-com_2098236.png) > [Comedy exists to laugh at things that aren't laughable. But isn't it? That's what separates us from the animals. We laugh.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-aren-t-laughable-but-isn-t-it/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05c/joan-rivers-669_animal_comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-ar_217614.png) > [Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-can-say-my-wife-makes-a/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/510/joan-rivers-669_aging_why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-c_1348562.png) > [Life is so tough. I don't know how old you are, but I've seen so much in a wink. One phone call…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-you-are-but-i-ve-seen-so-much/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a81/joan-rivers-669_changed_life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-yo_946189.png) > [Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everything-is-an-adventure-and-if/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ae/joan-rivers-669_adventure_travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everyth_1199327.png) > [Life is very tough, you know. You sit at a dinner party and talk to the person on your right or your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-is-very-tough-you-know-you-sit-at-a-dinner-party-and-talk-to-the/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45d/joan-rivers-669_break_life-is-very-tough-you-know-you-sit-at-a_2029655.png) > [As comedians, we are all laughing because life is so horrible. Life is so difficult, and I cope with it by making…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/as-comedians-we-are-all-laughing-because-life-is-so-horrible-life-is/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24e/joan-rivers-669_about_as-comedians-we-are-all-laughing-because_1289689.png) ## Other authors on Laughing ## More by Joan Rivers > [I didn't want to do 'Fashion Police' because I thought, 'This is stupid, this is beneath me, who wants to talk about fashion?' It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-didn-t-want-to-do-fashion-police-because-i-thought-this-is-stupid/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I was getting dressed and a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-was-getting-dressed-and-a-peeping-tom-looked-in-the-window-took-a/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [All my way through college, I worked my way as a window dresser for Lord & Taylor, so I always liked fashion. I always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/all-my-way-through-college-i-worked-my-way-as-a-window-dresser-for/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [Everyone thinks Angelina Jolie was the first celebrity baby hoarder, but she wasn't. Before Angelina there was Mia Farrow. Mia had an entire farm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/everyone-thinks-angelina-jolie-was-the-first-celebrity-baby-hoarder/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I have no sex appeal, which kills me. The only way I can ever hear heavy breathing from my husband's side of the bed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-have-no-sex-appeal-which-kills-me-the-only-way-i-can-ever-hear/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-goes-by-fast-enjoy-it-calm-down-it-s-all-funny/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [If you hate something, you hate it, and if you like something or somebody, you like it, but tell the truth. And most celebrities…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/if-you-hate-something-you-hate-it-and-if-you-like-something-or/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I have no line. If I think it's funny, it's funny.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-have-no-line-if-i-think-it-s-funny-it-s-funny/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I know now that everybody in the arts is forever a beginner. Experience counts for a great deal and very little. Every night onstage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-know-now-that-everybody-in-the-arts-is-forever-a-beginner/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [Why women don't blink during foreplay... not enough time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/why-women-don-t-blink-during-foreplay-not-enough-time/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [My breasts are so low now I can have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/my-breasts-are-so-low-now-i-can-have-a-mammogram-and-a-pedicure-at/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I love Vines. You make this 6.4-second drama, and you can reach 6 million viewer, and make people laugh. I find it so fabulous.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-love-vines-you-make-this-6-4-second-drama-and-you-can-reach-6/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes oink"? It's like talking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/grandchildren-can-be-annoying-how-many-times-can-you-go-and-the-cow/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [I'm a New York girl. I come out of New York theater.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-m-a-new-york-girl-i-come-out-of-new-york-theater/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [All babies look like Renée Zellweger pushed against a glass window.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/all-babies-look-like-ren-e-zellweger-pushed-against-a-glass-window/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/laughing/joan-rivers/#itemlist", "name": "17 Laughing Quotes By Joan Rivers", "numberOfItems": 17, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-what-you-can-spell/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68d/joan-rivers-669_diet_on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-wha_908845.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68d/joan-rivers-669_diet_on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-wha_908845.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68d/joan-rivers-669_diet_on-the-vanna-white-diet-you-only-eat-wha_908845.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don-t-step-on-my-boobs/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35b/joan-rivers-669_actresses_i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don_1392939.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35b/joan-rivers-669_actresses_i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don_1392939.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35b/joan-rivers-669_actresses_i-now-consider-it-a-good-day-when-i-don_1392939.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Life is very tough. 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First up: 'Horton Hears a Heroin Dealer.'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plans-to-write-a-series-of/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4d3/joan-rivers-669_announcements_russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plan_2534224.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4d3/joan-rivers-669_announcements_russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plan_2534224.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4d3/joan-rivers-669_announcements_russell-brand-has-announced-that-he-plan_2534224.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Russell Brand has announced that he plans to write a series of children's books. 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We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then don't watch us.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-comics-we-are-here-to-make-you/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4a3/joan-rivers-669_apologize_we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-com_2098236.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4a3/joan-rivers-669_apologize_we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-com_2098236.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4a3/joan-rivers-669_apologize_we-don-t-apologize-for-a-joke-we-are-com_2098236.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then don't…” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Comedy exists to laugh at things that aren't laughable. But isn't it? That's what separates us from the animals. We laugh.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-aren-t-laughable-but-isn-t-it/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05c/joan-rivers-669_animal_comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-ar_217614.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05c/joan-rivers-669_animal_comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-ar_217614.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05c/joan-rivers-669_animal_comedy-exists-to-laugh-at-things-that-ar_217614.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Comedy exists to laugh at things that aren't laughable. But isn't it? That's what separates us from the…” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-can-say-my-wife-makes-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/510/joan-rivers-669_aging_why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-c_1348562.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/510/joan-rivers-669_aging_why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-c_1348562.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/510/joan-rivers-669_aging_why-should-a-woman-cook-so-her-husband-c_1348562.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Life is so tough. I don't know how old you are, but I've seen so much in a wink. One phone call and your life is changed forever. We all know that. You better laugh at everything.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-you-are-but-i-ve-seen-so-much/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a81/joan-rivers-669_changed_life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-yo_946189.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a81/joan-rivers-669_changed_life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-yo_946189.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a81/joan-rivers-669_changed_life-is-so-tough-i-don-t-know-how-old-yo_946189.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Life is so tough. I don't know how old you are, but I've seen so much in a wink. 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And you do.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joan Rivers" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everything-is-an-adventure-and-if/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ae/joan-rivers-669_adventure_travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everyth_1199327.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ae/joan-rivers-669_adventure_travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everyth_1199327.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ae/joan-rivers-669_adventure_travel-is-the-excitement-of-life-everyth_1199327.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the…” — Joan Rivers", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Life is very tough, you know. 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