---
title: "6 Last time Quotes By Rodney Dangerfield"
description: "6 Last time quotes by Rodney Dangerfield. Plus more from Rodney Dangerfield and more Last time sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05e/rodney-dangerfield-755_happened_last-time-i-tried-to-make-love-to-my-wif_1366915.jpg"
---

> [Last time I tried to make love to my wife nothing happened, so I said to her, 'What's the matter, you can't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/last-time-i-tried-to-make-love-to-my-wife-nothing-happened-so-i-said/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05e/rodney-dangerfield-755_happened_last-time-i-tried-to-make-love-to-my-wif_1366915.jpg)

> [Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/last-time-i-saw-a-mouth-like-that-it-had-a-hook-in-it/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0ac/rodney-dangerfield-755_hook_last-time-i-saw-a-mouth-like-that-it-had_1429582.jpg)

> [My wife is so fat that the last time I saw something that big it was grazing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/my-wife-is-so-fat-that-the-last-time-i-saw-something-that-big-it-was/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/217/rodney-dangerfield-755_bigs_my-wife-is-so-fat-that-the-last-time-i-s_2085423.jpg)

> [I said to a girl I'd been seeing, come home with me, honey, and I'll show you where it's at. She said,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-said-to-a-girl-i-d-been-seeing-come-home-with-me-honey-and-i-ll/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ff9/rodney-dangerfield-755_coming-home_i-said-to-a-girl-i-d-been-seeing-come-ho_2166699.jpg)

> [I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-drink-too-much-the-last-time-i-gave-a-urine-sample-it-had-an-olive/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e1/rodney-dangerfield-755_drink_i-drink-too-much-the-last-time-i-gave-a_2251786.jpg)

> [Getting older is tough. I remember the last time I felt an erection. It was at the movies. The only trouble is,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/getting-older-is-tough-i-remember-the-last-time-i-felt-an-erection-it/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dc0/rodney-dangerfield-755_erection_getting-older-is-tough-i-remember-the-la_2818005.jpg)

## Other authors on Last time

## More by Rodney Dangerfield

> [For Christmas one year I bought my son a BB gun. He bought me a t-shirt with a bulls eye on the back.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/for-christmas-one-year-i-bought-my-son-a-bb-gun-he-bought-me-a-t/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I knew a girl so ugly, she had a face like a saint-a Saint Bernard!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-knew-a-girl-so-ugly-she-had-a-face-like-a-saint-a-saint-bernard/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [Every time I get in an elevator, the operator says the same thing to me: 'Basement?'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/every-time-i-get-in-an-elevator-the-operator-says-the-same-thing-to/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/my-wife-and-i-were-happy-for-20-years-then-we-met/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/she-failed-her-drivers-test-she-couldn-t-get-used-to-the-front-seat/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-tell-ya-when-i-was-a-kid-all-i-knew-was-rejection-my-yo-yo-it-never/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I don't care how rich and successful a man is. He's nothing without an education.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-don-t-care-how-rich-and-successful-a-man-is-he-s-nothing-without-an/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I went to a massage parlor, it was self service.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-went-to-a-massage-parlor-it-was-self-service/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [What a childhood I had. My parents sent me to a child psychiatrist. The kid didn't help me at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/what-a-childhood-i-had-my-parents-sent-me-to-a-child-psychiatrist-the/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [She was so fat that her belly button makes an echo.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/she-was-so-fat-that-her-belly-button-makes-an-echo/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/one-night-i-came-home-i-figured-let-my-wife-come-on-i-ll-play-it-cool/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-m-a-bad-lover-once-i-caught-a-peeping-tom-booing-me/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/i-tell-ya-i-knew-my-morning-wasn-t-going-right-when-i-put-on-my-shirt/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [My wife has teeth like the stars... they come out at night.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/my-wife-has-teeth-like-the-stars-they-come-out-at-night/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

> [It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rodney-dangerfield/it-s-tough-to-stay-married-my-wife-kisses-the-dog-on-the-lips-yet-she/)

[Rodney Dangerfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rodney-dangerfield/)

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