--- title: "28 Knows Quotes By Louis C. K" description: "28 Knows quotes by Louis C. K. Plus more from Louis C. K and more Knows sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cdc/louis-c-k-1150_disease_you-know-what-our-number-one-threat-is-h_1982105.png" --- > [You know what our number one threat is? Heart disease.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-know-what-our-number-one-threat-is-heart-disease/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cdc/louis-c-k-1150_disease_you-know-what-our-number-one-threat-is-h_1982105.png) > [Sorry - Americans only buy things that come from suffering. They just enjoy it more when they know someone's getting hurt.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-come-from-suffering-they-just-2/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ed0/louis-c-k-1150_americans_sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-com_1338979.png) > [I do love standup. I love comedians. They're my community. Also, because I know so many of them, I know the value…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they-re-my-community-also-because/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/louis-c-k-1150_can-do_i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they_2656941.png) > [My bank is the worst. They are screwing me. You know what they did to me? They're charging me money for not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-me-you-know-what-they-did-to/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1c/louis-c-k-1150_bank_my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-m_1080906.png) > [We have white people problems in America. You know what that is? That's when your life is amazing, so you just make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/we-have-white-people-problems-in-america-you-know-what-that-is-that-s/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/589/louis-c-k-1150_america_we-have-white-people-problems-in-america_1734775.png) > [I don't care about the weight. You know, I'm lucky; I'm one of those people - I can eat donuts, whatever, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i-m-lucky-i-m-one-of-those/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/140/louis-c-k-1150_care_i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i_2440883.png) > [I found out that I'm a pretty bad father. I make a lot of mistakes and I don't know what I'm doing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father-i-make-a-lot-of-mistakes-and/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_best-father_i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father_1996768.png) > [I ate too much and masturbated too recently, you know? It's bad to like jerk off and run out the door, 'cause…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recently-you-know-it-s-bad-to-like/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/560/louis-c-k-1150_alone-time_i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recen_912009.jpg) > [I don't know if you've ever had just five dollars in the bank, but I've found that if that's all you have,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-five-dollars-in-the-bank-but-i/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e1/louis-c-k-1150_bank_i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-fiv_1692348.png) > [Someday, one of your friends is gonna get divorced, it's gonna happen, and they're gonna tell you. Don't go, 'ohhhh I'm sorry.'…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get-divorced-it-s-gonna-happen/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f0/louis-c-k-1150_being-real_someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get_2534318.png) > [I'm close to my audience. I think I have more tools in my box than other guys who might try it. Also,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have-more-tools-in-my-box-than/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/267/louis-c-k-1150_adept_i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have_944209.jpg) > [I just don't trust any of it. Every time I read something about how there's been another ridiculous climb of the Dow…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time-i-read-something-about-how/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a65/louis-c-k-1150_be-good_i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time_1940286.jpg) > [My kids and I figured out that there’s a third kind of person, and I don’t know what you call them, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a-third-kind-of-person-and-i/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/216/louis-c-k-1150_glass_my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a_794399.png) > [How do women still go out with guys, when you consider the fact that there is no greater threat to women than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when-you-consider-the-fact-that/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49f/louis-c-k-1150_causes_how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when_3147093.png) > [You can't answer a kid's question. A kid never accepts any answer. A kid never says, 'Oh, thanks. I get it.'... They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid-never-accepts-any-answer-a/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e8/louis-c-k-1150_accepting_you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid_2527236.png) > [I love being married. It's great. But I hate arguing. I hate fighting. You know what I do now? When we get…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-hate-arguing-i-hate-fighting/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/louis-c-k-1150_arguing_i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-ha_2316056.jpg) > [Sometimes I just want to tell a story regardless of whether it fits what the show is saying. I’ve been in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-regardless-of-whether-it-fits/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_black_sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-re_293339.jpg) > [When you're a father in a marriage, you sort of become the mother's assistant, and you sort of get a list from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-sort-of-become-the-mother-s-2/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2dd/louis-c-k-1150_activate_when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-s_1412522.jpg) > [One time, I threw a candy wrapper on the street. I was with a friend who said to me, You just littered…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the-street-i-was-with-a-friend/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/louis-c-k-1150_candy_one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the_2281326.jpg) > [I can feel how an audience is reacting when I'm on a stage, but when you are on stage, your perception is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-when-i-m-on-a-stage-but-when/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e9/louis-c-k-1150_audience_i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-w_32641.jpg) > [I've had two great years, probably five good years. So I had 20 years of just kind of uncertainty and suffering and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-ve-had-two-great-years-probably-five-good-years-so-i-had-20-years/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1cb/louis-c-k-1150_degenerates_i-ve-had-two-great-years-probably-five-g_483962.png) > [I was talking to my friend and he said his girlfriend was mad at him. I said, "What happened?" He goes: "Well,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-was-talking-to-my-friend-and-he-said-his-girlfriend-was-mad-at-him/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bd7/louis-c-k-1150_comedy_i-was-talking-to-my-friend-and-he-said-h_1282025.jpg) > [When my kids were younger, I used to avoid them. I used to sit on the toilet 'til my legs fell asleep.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoid-them-i-used-to-sit-on-the/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b9e/louis-c-k-1150_father_when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoi_728614.jpg) > [I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-will-be-times-when-i-m-not-even/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/louis-c-k-1150_ass_i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-wil_2072337.png) > [Some people think it's demeaning to victims if you ever say anything out-loud about sexual abuse of children. I don't know if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-victims-if-you-ever-say-anything/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2f/louis-c-k-1150_abuse_some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-vict_1000722.png) > [One time I was at a swimming pool with my kids, a public pool. I had my daughter, my six year old,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-my-kids-a-public-pool-i-had-my/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e0/louis-c-k-1150_arms_one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-m_1276260.jpg) > [You know when you see a mother someplace just melting down on her kid? She's like, 'Shut up, I hate you, you're…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace-just-melting-down-on-her-kid/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b85/louis-c-k-1150_fatherhood_you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace_2624069.png) > [Why can't we have racism that's ignorant but nice? You could have stereotypes that are positive about race. You could say, "Those…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant-but-nice-you-could-have/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/361/louis-c-k-1150_candy_why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant_2275911.png) ## Other authors on Knows ## More by Louis C. K > [Technically, I've learned that having good legs and wind is good for being on stage. You have to be in shape and have endurance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/technically-i-ve-learned-that-having-good-legs-and-wind-is-good-for/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I think I'm past any window where I'm suddenly going to become surprisingly ripped so that people go, 'Oh, my God, what happened to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-think-i-m-past-any-window-where-i-m-suddenly-going-to-become/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I can feel how an audience is reacting when I'm on a stage, but when you are on stage, your perception is distorted. That's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-when-i-m-on-a-stage-but-when/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [“You need to develop the ability to just be yourself and not be doing something, that's what the phones are taking away. The ability…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-need-to-develop-the-ability-to-just-be-yourself-and-not-be-doing/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I know what it's like to have a bunch of material that's working that you don't care about. You want to die.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-know-what-it-s-like-to-have-a-bunch-of-material-that-s-working-that/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I just love learning. I think learning is how you live. The verb of my life is learning.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-just-love-learning-i-think-learning-is-how-you-live-the-verb-of-my/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [There's been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It's really easy to say, 'Well, you're Christian, you're anti-this and that, and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/there-s-been-a-lot-of-simple-vilification-of-right-wing-people-it-s/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [“A woman saying yes to a date with a man is literally insane and ill-advised, and the whole species' existence counts on them doing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/a-woman-saying-yes-to-a-date-with-a-man-is-literally-insane-and-ill/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [When your kid is being selfish or greedy and you want to help them not be that way, you have to find a way…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-your-kid-is-being-selfish-or-greedy-and-you-want-to-help-them/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [You have to be really tenacious. You have to keep at it. There are many roads to get there. If you can get yourself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-have-to-be-really-tenacious-you-have-to-keep-at-it-there-are-many/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-i-take-my-kids-out-for-dinner-or-lunch-people-smile-at-us/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I'd love to have a shitty job. I couldn't hold any down. Standup was the only thing I could stick with. I'm an idiot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-d-love-to-have-a-shitty-job-i-couldn-t-hold-any-down-standup-was/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [There's no way you ask Sean Penn a question and then, you're gonna be HUGE !](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/there-s-no-way-you-ask-sean-penn-a-question-and-then-you-re-gonna-be/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [If you had a jetpack you'd be like I have the shittiest jetpack. Who's your service provider on your jetpack? Did they make the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/if-you-had-a-jetpack-you-d-be-like-i-have-the-shittiest-jetpack-who-s/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) > [I spend enough time onscreen looking hangdog and depressed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-spend-enough-time-onscreen-looking-hangdog-and-depressed/) [Louis C. K](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-c-k/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/knows/louis-c-k/#itemlist", "name": "28 Knows Quotes By Louis C. K", "numberOfItems": 28, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You know what our number one threat is? Heart disease.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. 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K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-come-from-suffering-they-just-2/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ed0/louis-c-k-1150_americans_sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-com_1338979.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ed0/louis-c-k-1150_americans_sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-com_1338979.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ed0/louis-c-k-1150_americans_sorry-americans-only-buy-things-that-com_1338979.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Sorry - Americans only buy things that come from suffering. They just enjoy it more when they know someone's…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I do love standup. I love comedians. They're my community. Also, because I know so many of them, I know the value of them. I know what they can do.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they-re-my-community-also-because/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/louis-c-k-1150_can-do_i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they_2656941.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/louis-c-k-1150_can-do_i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they_2656941.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/louis-c-k-1150_can-do_i-do-love-standup-i-love-comedians-they_2656941.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I do love standup. I love comedians. They're my community. Also, because I know so many of them, I know the…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "My bank is the worst. They are screwing me. You know what they did to me? They're charging me money for not having enough money. Apparently, when you're broke, that costs money.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-me-you-know-what-they-did-to/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1c/louis-c-k-1150_bank_my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-m_1080906.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1c/louis-c-k-1150_bank_my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-m_1080906.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1c/louis-c-k-1150_bank_my-bank-is-the-worst-they-are-screwing-m_1080906.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“My bank is the worst. They are screwing me. You know what they did to me? They're charging me money for not…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "We have white people problems in America. You know what that is? That's when your life is amazing, so you just make stuff up to get worried about.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/we-have-white-people-problems-in-america-you-know-what-that-is-that-s/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/589/louis-c-k-1150_america_we-have-white-people-problems-in-america_1734775.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/589/louis-c-k-1150_america_we-have-white-people-problems-in-america_1734775.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/589/louis-c-k-1150_america_we-have-white-people-problems-in-america_1734775.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We have white people problems in America. You know what that is? That's when your life is amazing, so you…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 6, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I don't care about the weight. You know, I'm lucky; I'm one of those people - I can eat donuts, whatever, and I just get fat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i-m-lucky-i-m-one-of-those/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/140/louis-c-k-1150_care_i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i_2440883.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/140/louis-c-k-1150_care_i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i_2440883.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/140/louis-c-k-1150_care_i-don-t-care-about-the-weight-you-know-i_2440883.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I don't care about the weight. You know, I'm lucky; I'm one of those people - I can eat donuts, whatever…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I found out that I'm a pretty bad father. I make a lot of mistakes and I don't know what I'm doing. But my kids love me. Go figure.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father-i-make-a-lot-of-mistakes-and/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_best-father_i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father_1996768.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_best-father_i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father_1996768.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_best-father_i-found-out-that-i-m-a-pretty-bad-father_1996768.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I found out that I'm a pretty bad father. I make a lot of mistakes and I don't know what I'm doing. But my…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I ate too much and masturbated too recently, you know? It's bad to like jerk off and run out the door, 'cause you run into somebody. \"Oh, she knows...\" You got to take some time alone to process the shame.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recently-you-know-it-s-bad-to-like/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/560/louis-c-k-1150_alone-time_i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recen_912009.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/560/louis-c-k-1150_alone-time_i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recen_912009.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/560/louis-c-k-1150_alone-time_i-ate-too-much-and-masturbated-too-recen_912009.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I ate too much and masturbated too recently, you know? It's bad to like jerk off and run out the door…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I don't know if you've ever had just five dollars in the bank, but I've found that if that's all you have, you can't get it out.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-five-dollars-in-the-bank-but-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e1/louis-c-k-1150_bank_i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-fiv_1692348.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e1/louis-c-k-1150_bank_i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-fiv_1692348.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1e1/louis-c-k-1150_bank_i-don-t-know-if-you-ve-ever-had-just-fiv_1692348.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I don't know if you've ever had just five dollars in the bank, but I've found that if that's all you have…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Someday, one of your friends is gonna get divorced, it's gonna happen, and they're gonna tell you. Don't go, 'ohhhh I'm sorry.' That's a stupid thing to say. First of all you're making 'em feel bad for being really happy, which isn't fair. And second of all: divorce is always good news. I know that sounds weird, but it's true, because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. It's really that simple.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get-divorced-it-s-gonna-happen/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f0/louis-c-k-1150_being-real_someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get_2534318.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f0/louis-c-k-1150_being-real_someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get_2534318.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f0/louis-c-k-1150_being-real_someday-one-of-your-friends-is-gonna-get_2534318.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Someday, one of your friends is gonna get divorced, it's gonna happen, and they're gonna tell you. Don't go…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm close to my audience. I think I have more tools in my box than other guys who might try it. Also, I know how to do this stuff. I know how to write and shoot and edit. I'm technically adept and that helped with the website. You need a big skill set.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have-more-tools-in-my-box-than/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/267/louis-c-k-1150_adept_i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have_944209.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/267/louis-c-k-1150_adept_i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have_944209.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/267/louis-c-k-1150_adept_i-m-close-to-my-audience-i-think-i-have_944209.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm close to my audience. I think I have more tools in my box than other guys who might try it. Also, I know…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I just don't trust any of it. Every time I read something about how there's been another ridiculous climb of the Dow Jones, there's a part of me that goes, \"This can't be good.\" None of this is real money. You know what I mean? It's not like there's actually more of anything. It's just ideas. When people are getting richer and richer but they're not actually producing anything, it can't end well.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time-i-read-something-about-how/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a65/louis-c-k-1150_be-good_i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time_1940286.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a65/louis-c-k-1150_be-good_i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time_1940286.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a65/louis-c-k-1150_be-good_i-just-don-t-trust-any-of-it-every-time_1940286.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I just don't trust any of it. Every time I read something about how there's been another ridiculous climb of…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "My kids and I figured out that there’s a third kind of person, and I don’t know what you call them, but it’s somebody who sees that the glass is always full because it’s half full with water and half full with nothing, so that’s the third kind of person. I don’t know what it is.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a-third-kind-of-person-and-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/216/louis-c-k-1150_glass_my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a_794399.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/216/louis-c-k-1150_glass_my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a_794399.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/216/louis-c-k-1150_glass_my-kids-and-i-figured-out-that-there-s-a_794399.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“My kids and I figured out that there’s a third kind of person, and I don’t know what you call them, but it’s…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "How do women still go out with guys, when you consider the fact that there is no greater threat to women than men? We're the number one threat to women. Globally and historically, we're the number one cause of injury and mayhem to women... You know what our number one threat is? Heart disease.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when-you-consider-the-fact-that/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49f/louis-c-k-1150_causes_how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when_3147093.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49f/louis-c-k-1150_causes_how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when_3147093.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49f/louis-c-k-1150_causes_how-do-women-still-go-out-with-guys-when_3147093.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“How do women still go out with guys, when you consider the fact that there is no greater threat to women…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You can't answer a kid's question. A kid never accepts any answer. A kid never says, 'Oh, thanks. I get it.'... They just keep coming with more questions - why, why, why? - until you don't even know who the fk you are anymore at the end of the conversation. It's an insane deconstruction.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid-never-accepts-any-answer-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e8/louis-c-k-1150_accepting_you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid_2527236.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e8/louis-c-k-1150_accepting_you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid_2527236.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e8/louis-c-k-1150_accepting_you-can-t-answer-a-kid-s-question-a-kid_2527236.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You can't answer a kid's question. A kid never accepts any answer. A kid never says, 'Oh, thanks. I get…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I love being married. It's great. But I hate arguing. I hate fighting. You know what I do now? When we get in an argument, I just take her side against me. It's just easier; it goes quicker. She's like, \"What's wrong with you?\" And I'm like, \"I know! Damn it! Argh!\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-hate-arguing-i-hate-fighting/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/louis-c-k-1150_arguing_i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-ha_2316056.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/louis-c-k-1150_arguing_i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-ha_2316056.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/louis-c-k-1150_arguing_i-love-being-married-it-s-great-but-i-ha_2316056.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I love being married. It's great. But I hate arguing. I hate fighting. You know what I do now? When we get…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Sometimes I just want to tell a story regardless of whether it fits what the show is saying. I’ve been in a lot of writing rooms where somebody says an idea and everyone’s dying, like laughing so they’re delirious. It’s like a black hole in a good way, everything starts to fall into it, you know what I mean.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-regardless-of-whether-it-fits/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_black_sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-re_293339.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_black_sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-re_293339.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b07/louis-c-k-1150_black_sometimes-i-just-want-to-tell-a-story-re_293339.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Sometimes I just want to tell a story regardless of whether it fits what the show is saying. I’ve been in a…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you're a father in a marriage, you sort of become the mother's assistant, and you sort of get a list from her every day, and you do, you know, you run down the list, and it feels very much like a chore. And a lot of fathers live in kind of an avoidance. They sit on the toilet for several hours a day... Oh, honey, it took me 40 minutes to go to the post office... But once you become a dad without the mom there, you have to take it all on, and you sort of activate male skills that you didn't know you could apply to fatherhood.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-sort-of-become-the-mother-s-2/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2dd/louis-c-k-1150_activate_when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-s_1412522.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2dd/louis-c-k-1150_activate_when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-s_1412522.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2dd/louis-c-k-1150_activate_when-you-re-a-father-in-a-marriage-you-s_1412522.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you're a father in a marriage, you sort of become the mother's assistant, and you sort of get a list…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "One time, I threw a candy wrapper on the street. I was with a friend who said to me, You just littered on the street! Don't you care about the environment? And I thought about it, and I said, You know what? This isn't the environment. This is New York City. New York City is not the environment. New York City is a giant piece of litter. Next to Mexico City, it's the shittiest piece of litter in the world. Just a pussy, runny, smokin', stinkin' piece of litter.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the-street-i-was-with-a-friend/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/louis-c-k-1150_candy_one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the_2281326.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/louis-c-k-1150_candy_one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the_2281326.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/louis-c-k-1150_candy_one-time-i-threw-a-candy-wrapper-on-the_2281326.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“One time, I threw a candy wrapper on the street. I was with a friend who said to me, You just littered on…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 20, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I can feel how an audience is reacting when I'm on a stage, but when you are on stage, your perception is distorted. That's something you just have to know. It's like pilots that fly at high Gs and they lose, sometimes, consciousness and hand/eye coordination and they just have to know that that's going to happen. They have to be trained to not try to do too much while they are doing that. So when you are on stage, you have to be aware that you are wrong about how it feels a lot of times.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-when-i-m-on-a-stage-but-when/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e9/louis-c-k-1150_audience_i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-w_32641.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e9/louis-c-k-1150_audience_i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-w_32641.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e9/louis-c-k-1150_audience_i-can-feel-how-an-audience-is-reacting-w_32641.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I can feel how an audience is reacting when I'm on a stage, but when you are on stage, your perception is…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 21, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I've had two great years, probably five good years. So I had 20 years of just kind of uncertainty and suffering and ego destruction and poverty. All these things. There's no way I'm ever going to catch up to the misery years. It's impossible... If I don't do anything dumb or I don't get a disease or something, and then I've got to five to eight years I think where it'll really be great and then it will start to degenerate like uranium, you know?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. 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I said, \"What happened?\" He goes: \"Well, I guess I, uh... I guess I said something, and, uh... and then she got her feelings hurt.\" That's a weird way to phrase it: \"She got her feelings hurt. I said something, and then she...\" Could you more remove yourself from responsibility? \"She got her feelings hurt.\" It's like saying, \"Yeah, I shot this guy in the face, and then I guess he got himself murdered. I don't know what happened. He leaned into it.\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. 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You want to know why your father spends so long in the toilet? Because he's not sure he wants to be a father.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoid-them-i-used-to-sit-on-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b9e/louis-c-k-1150_father_when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoi_728614.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b9e/louis-c-k-1150_father_when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoi_728614.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b9e/louis-c-k-1150_father_when-my-kids-were-younger-i-used-to-avoi_728614.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When my kids were younger, I used to avoid them. I used to sit on the toilet 'til my legs fell asleep. You…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 24, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need to go wipe my ass right now.'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-will-be-times-when-i-m-not-even/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/louis-c-k-1150_ass_i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-wil_2072337.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/louis-c-k-1150_ass_i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-wil_2072337.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf7/louis-c-k-1150_ass_i-know-i-m-getting-old-because-there-wil_2072337.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I know I'm getting old because there will be times when I'm not even doing anything and I'll think, 'I need…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 25, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Some people think it's demeaning to victims if you ever say anything out-loud about sexual abuse of children. I don't know if that's true.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-victims-if-you-ever-say-anything/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2f/louis-c-k-1150_abuse_some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-vict_1000722.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2f/louis-c-k-1150_abuse_some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-vict_1000722.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2f/louis-c-k-1150_abuse_some-people-think-it-s-demeaning-to-vict_1000722.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Some people think it's demeaning to victims if you ever say anything out-loud about sexual abuse of…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 26, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "One time I was at a swimming pool with my kids, a public pool. I had my daughter, my six year old, on my arm like this. She was like clamped on, and she's kicking. ... And then she got off and another random child just clamped on. It's like a rat. \"Get off of me.\" \"But I love you.\" \"I don't know you, kid.\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-my-kids-a-public-pool-i-had-my/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e0/louis-c-k-1150_arms_one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-m_1276260.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e0/louis-c-k-1150_arms_one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-m_1276260.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9e0/louis-c-k-1150_arms_one-time-i-was-at-a-swimming-pool-with-m_1276260.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“One time I was at a swimming pool with my kids, a public pool. I had my daughter, my six year old, on my arm…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 27, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You know when you see a mother someplace just melting down on her kid? She's like, 'Shut up, I hate you, you're ugly!'... Any parents there are thinking, 'What did that shitty kid do to that poor woman? That poor woman. I wish I could help.'", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace-just-melting-down-on-her-kid/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b85/louis-c-k-1150_fatherhood_you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace_2624069.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b85/louis-c-k-1150_fatherhood_you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace_2624069.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b85/louis-c-k-1150_fatherhood_you-know-when-you-see-a-mother-someplace_2624069.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You know when you see a mother someplace just melting down on her kid? She's like, 'Shut up, I hate you…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 28, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Why can't we have racism that's ignorant but nice? You could have stereotypes that are positive about race. You could say, \"Those Chinese people, they can fly!\" \"You know about the Puerto Ricans? They're made of candy!\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis C. K" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-c-k/why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant-but-nice-you-could-have/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/361/louis-c-k-1150_candy_why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant_2275911.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/361/louis-c-k-1150_candy_why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant_2275911.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/361/louis-c-k-1150_candy_why-can-t-we-have-racism-that-s-ignorant_2275911.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Why can't we have racism that's ignorant but nice? You could have stereotypes that are positive about race…” — Louis C. K", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/knows/louis-c-k/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/knows/louis-c-k/", "name": "Knows Quotes by Louis C. 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