--- title: "10 Jon Stewart Quotes By Chris Smith" description: "10 Jon Stewart quotes by Chris Smith. Plus more from Chris Smith and more Jon Stewart sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e0/chris-smith-17487_humor_if-comedy-is-tragedy-plus-time-i-need-mo_1325754.jpg" --- > [“If comedy is tragedy plus time, I need more fucking time. But I would really settle for less fucking tragedy.” ~ Jon Stewart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/if-comedy-is-tragedy-plus-time-i-need-more-fucking-time-but-i-would/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e0/chris-smith-17487_humor_if-comedy-is-tragedy-plus-time-i-need-mo_1325754.jpg) > [“You’re tired of hearing about racism? Imagine how fucking exhausting it is living it.” ~ Jon Stewart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/you-re-tired-of-hearing-about-racism-imagine-how-fucking-exhausting/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/59c/chris-smith-17487_racism_you-re-tired-of-hearing-about-racism-ima_2330047.jpg) > [“There are people that I believe shouldn’t like me, and if they did, I’d be sad. ~ Jon Stewart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/there-are-people-that-i-believe-shouldn-t-like-me-and-if-they-did-i-d/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/38c/chris-smith-17487_jon-stewart_there-are-people-that-i-believe-shouldn_2068195.jpg) > [“I have such a lowered bar of expectation, and they managed to crawl underneath it. ~ Jon Stewart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/i-have-such-a-lowered-bar-of-expectation-and-they-managed-to-crawl/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0a0/chris-smith-17487_jon-stewart_i-have-such-a-lowered-bar-of-expectation_1743647.jpg) > [“I’m kind of relieved I don’t have to say anything on TV about tragedies anymore. ~ JON STEWART”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/i-m-kind-of-relieved-i-don-t-have-to-say-anything-on-tv-about/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e83/chris-smith-17487_jon-stewart_i-m-kind-of-relieved-i-don-t-have-to-say_1676951.jpg) > [“In some ways the Zadroga thing was the subtext of the whole show, the whole sixteen years. A bewilderment, a bewilderment over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-subtext-of-the-whole-show-the/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d6/chris-smith-17487_quote_in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-s_586803.jpg) > [“But the point is: On the right, they’re pretending that our “truthfulness” is what’s really important to them. Which, ironically, is not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pretending-that-our/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f4c/chris-smith-17487_partisan-politics_but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pr_1499277.jpg) > [“Bullshit is everywhere.” (...) Then there’s the more pernicious bullshit… It comes in three flavors: Making bad things sound good… “Patriot Act.”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the-more-pernicious-bullshit-it/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/606/chris-smith-17487_bad-thing_bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the_1812365.jpg) > [ “Stephen Colbert: \[sitting to Stewart’s right at the anchor desk\] Actually, Jon, we’re not quite done. Jon Stewart: \[rolling away from Colbert… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-right-at-the-anchor-desk/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/chris-smith-17487_years-ago_stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-rig_1007155.jpg) > [ “Jon Stewart: \[at anchor desk\] The media, of course, must walk a fine line covering this story. With more we turn to… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of-course-must-walk-a-fine-line/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/041/chris-smith-17487_crawl_jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of_2383666.jpg) ## More by Chris Smith > [“I pocketed two boxes of M&M’s with the presidential seal. You open it up and you really are expecting the best M&M’s you’ve ever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/i-pocketed-two-boxes-of-m-m-s-with-the-presidential-seal-you-open-it/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [Rather than dull our consciences to the unmitigated violence of abortion, the passage of time has only enabled us to see and, frankly, better…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/rather-than-dull-our-consciences-to-the-unmitigated-violence-of/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [My favorite is Matthew 25: 'The Lord said, 'Whatever you do to the least of my brethren, you do to me.' I truly believe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/my-favorite-is-matthew-25-the-lord-said-whatever-you-do-to-the-least/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [“In some ways the Zadroga thing was the subtext of the whole show, the whole sixteen years. A bewilderment, a bewilderment over something which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-subtext-of-the-whole-show-the/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [The world is a challenging place in terms of wars and peace, basic human rights and freedoms. The Holy Father has a major role…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/the-world-is-a-challenging-place-in-terms-of-wars-and-peace-basic/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [Pregnancy is not a disease. The child in the womb is neither a tumor nor a parasite to be destroyed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/pregnancy-is-not-a-disease-the-child-in-the-womb-is-neither-a-tumor/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [What my Republican colleagues often don't understand is that labor is a human-rights issue. I have to remind them Lech Walesa and the Solidarity…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/what-my-republican-colleagues-often-don-t-understand-is-that-labor-is/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [ “Stephen Colbert: \[sitting to Stewart’s right at the anchor desk\] Actually, Jon, we’re not quite done. Jon Stewart: \[rolling away from Colbert on his… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-right-at-the-anchor-desk/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [I believe evidence is overwhelming that chronic Lyme is a terrible, overwhelming disease, and we need to find ways to treat this. To say…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/i-believe-evidence-is-overwhelming-that-chronic-lyme-is-a-terrible/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [“or the need for a Trump 2012 presidential campaign (“This is what I’ve been waiting for my whole life, a president who’s not afraid…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/or-the-need-for-a-trump-2012-presidential-campaign-this-is-what-i-ve/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [The passage of time hasn't changed the fact that abortion is a serious, lethal violation of fundamental human rights, and that women and children…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/the-passage-of-time-hasn-t-changed-the-fact-that-abortion-is-a/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [“If comedy is tragedy plus time, I need more fucking time. But I would really settle for less fucking tragedy.” ~ Jon Stewart”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/if-comedy-is-tragedy-plus-time-i-need-more-fucking-time-but-i-would/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [Parental child abduction is child abuse.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/parental-child-abduction-is-child-abuse/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [“But the point is: On the right, they’re pretending that our “truthfulness” is what’s really important to them. Which, ironically, is not true. What…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pretending-that-our/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) > [“When Death comes, I want to be ready.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/when-death-comes-i-want-to-be-ready/) [Chris Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-smith/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jon-stewart/chris-smith/#itemlist", "name": "10 Jon Stewart Quotes By Chris Smith", "numberOfItems": 10, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If comedy is tragedy plus time, I need more fucking time. 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A bewilderment, a bewilderment over something which seems obvious that was not being accomplished. The whole show was that: “Does anyone else think this is fucking weird?” That’s it. That’s all the show was. I don’t think that’s a noble thing. But it’s something. It’s a shared moment. ~ Jon Stewart”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Chris Smith" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-subtext-of-the-whole-show-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d6/chris-smith-17487_quote_in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-s_586803.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d6/chris-smith-17487_quote_in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-s_586803.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d6/chris-smith-17487_quote_in-some-ways-the-zadroga-thing-was-the-s_586803.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“In some ways the Zadroga thing was the subtext of the whole show, the whole sixteen years. A bewilderment, a…” — Chris Smith", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“But the point is: On the right, they’re pretending that our “truthfulness” is what’s really important to them. Which, ironically, is not true. What matters to them is discrediting anything that they believe harms their side. That is their prime directive. And unlike Kirk, they fuckin’ stick with it. They don’t just drop the protocol any time they feel like humping a green girl in a unitard. [video clip of Captain Kirk, pursuing a green girl in a unitard] And this, this, is their genius. Conservatives are not looking to make education more rigorous and informative, or science more empirical or verifiable, or voting more representative, or the government more efficient or effective. They just want all those things to reinforce their partisan, ideological, conservative viewpoint. ~ Jon Stewart”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Chris Smith" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pretending-that-our/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f4c/chris-smith-17487_partisan-politics_but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pr_1499277.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f4c/chris-smith-17487_partisan-politics_but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pr_1499277.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f4c/chris-smith-17487_partisan-politics_but-the-point-is-on-the-right-they-re-pr_1499277.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“But the point is: On the right, they’re pretending that our “truthfulness” is what’s really important to…” — Chris Smith", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Bullshit is everywhere.” (...) Then there’s the more pernicious bullshit… It comes in three flavors: Making bad things sound good… “Patriot Act.” Because “Are You Scared Enough to Let Me Look at All Your Phone Records Act” doesn’t sell… Number two: hiding bad things under mountains of bullshit. “Hey, a handful of billionaires can’t buy our elections, right?” “Of course not. They can only pour unlimited, anonymous cash into a 501( c)( 4) if 50 percent is devoted to ‘issue education’”… And finally, my favorite: the bullshit of infinite possibility… “We cannot take action on climate change until everyone in the world agrees gay marriage vaccines won’t cause our children to marry goats who are coming for our guns. Until then, I say we teach the controversy.” So I say to you, friends: The best defense against bullshit is vigilance. So if you smell something, say something. ~Jon Stewart”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Chris Smith" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the-more-pernicious-bullshit-it/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/606/chris-smith-17487_bad-thing_bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the_1812365.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/606/chris-smith-17487_bad-thing_bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the_1812365.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/606/chris-smith-17487_bad-thing_bullshit-is-everywhere-then-there-s-the_1812365.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Bullshit is everywhere.” (...) Then there’s the more pernicious bullshit… It comes in three flavors: Making…” — Chris Smith", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Stephen Colbert: [sitting to Stewart’s right at the anchor desk] Actually, Jon, we’re not quite done. Jon Stewart: [rolling away from Colbert on his chair and nearly toppling off the riser] Don’t do this. Stephen Colbert: [rolling after Stewart and grabbing him by the arm] No—you can’t stop anyone, because they don’t work for you anymore! Huge mistake! Jon Stewart: Please don’t do this. Stephen Colbert: Here’s the thing: You said to me and to many other people here years ago never to thank you, because we owe you nothing. Jon Stewart: [quietly] That’s right. Stephen Colbert: It’s one of the few times I’ve known you to be dead wrong… We owe you because we learned from you, by example, how to do a show with intention, with clarity. How to treat people with respect. You are infuriatingly good at your job, okay? [Stewart covers his eyes, which appear to be filled with tears] And all of us who were lucky enough to work with you—and you can edit this out later—for sixteen years are better at our jobs because we got to watch you do yours. And we are better people for having known you… Personally, I do not know how this son of a poor, Appalachian turd miner—I do not know what I would do if you hadn’t brought me on this show. I’d be back in those hills, mining turds with Pappy! Jon—and it’s almost over—I know you are not asking for this, but on behalf of so many people whose lives you changed over the past sixteen years, thank you. And now, I believe your line—correct me if I’m wrong—is “We’ll be right back.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Chris Smith" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-right-at-the-anchor-desk/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/chris-smith-17487_years-ago_stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-rig_1007155.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/chris-smith-17487_years-ago_stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-rig_1007155.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eb4/chris-smith-17487_years-ago_stephen-colbert-sitting-to-stewart-s-rig_1007155.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Stephen Colbert: [sitting to Stewart’s right at the anchor desk] Actually, Jon, we’re not quite done. Jon…” — Chris Smith", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Jon Stewart: [at anchor desk] The media, of course, must walk a fine line covering this story. With more we turn to Steve Carell in the Daily Show news center. Steve? Steve Carell: [standing in front of a bank of TV monitors] Jon, this is in many ways an unprecedented situation for us. [A blue band with white letters—the “crawl,” or “chyron” in TV lingo—scrolls across the screen, at Carell’s waist level] Crawl: MAJORITY LEADER DASCHLE RECEIVES LETTER CONTAINING ANTHRAX. Steve Carell: On the one hand, we must alert the country to the latest events. Crawl: AL QAEDA VOWS NEW ATTACKS. Steve Carell: And on the other hand, we musn’t cause undue alarm. Crawl: FBI WARNS SOMETHING BAD TO HAPPEN SOMEWHERE SOMETIME. Steve Carell: Scaremongering isn’t the way to go. Crawl: WHITE POWDER FOUND ON DONUT IN ST. LOUIS. Steve Carell: So far the media has in fact shown restraint. Crawl: STORMS BATTER NEW ENGLAND—LINK TO TERRORISM STILL UNDETERMINED. Steve Carell: And I must stress this—there is absolutely no need to panic. Crawl: [picking up speed as it moves left to right] CIA: THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS FROM YOU ON THE BUS LOOKS A LITTLE SHIFTY. Steve Carell: Patience, diligence, and above all, responsibility. Crawl: A FRIEND OF THIS GUY I KNOW CONFIRMS HIS GIRLFRIEND TOLD HIM “THEY’RE PLANNING SOMETHING IN A MALL OR SOMETHING.” Steve Carell: Jon, we have a job to do here, but we also need perspective. Crawl: [accelerating] OH, F—! WHAT WAS THAT SOUND? SERIOUSLY, DID YOU HEAR A SOUND? Steve Carell: And in keeping that perspective— Crawl: “THE HORROR, THE HORROR”—KURTZ. POLL: 91% OF AMERICANS “WANT MOMMY.” Steve Carell: Okay, that was—no, no, no, that was unacceptable. Jon, would you excuse me for a minute? [walks out of frame] Crawl: CHICKEN LITTLE: “THE SKY IS FALLING! THE SKY IS FALLING!” OH GOD, OH GOD. [Carell confronts technician typing the crawl, beats him up as screen goes snowy] Jon Stewart: We’re having some technical difficulties with the crawl. Ah, Steve Carell is back! Steve Carell: Sorry about that, Jon. As I was saying, we journalists have to make sure that our worst instincts are curbed in the sake of national interest. Crawl: EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE JUST WONDERFUL WITH LOLLIPOPS AND RAINBOWS AND HAPPY FEELINGS FOR EVERYONE. Steve Carell: It’s a unique challenge, but one I think the greatest free press in the world can easily attain. Crawl: BUNNIES ARE CUTE, CUDDLY, AND COMFORTING. Steve Carell: Jon?”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Chris Smith" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-smith/jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of-course-must-walk-a-fine-line/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/041/chris-smith-17487_crawl_jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of_2383666.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/041/chris-smith-17487_crawl_jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of_2383666.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/041/chris-smith-17487_crawl_jon-stewart-at-anchor-desk-the-media-of_2383666.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Jon Stewart: [at anchor desk] The media, of course, must walk a fine line covering this story. With more we…” — Chris Smith", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jon-stewart/chris-smith/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jon-stewart/chris-smith/", "name": "Jon Stewart Quotes by Chris Smith", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jon-stewart/chris-smith/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5e0/chris-smith-17487_humor_if-comedy-is-tragedy-plus-time-i-need-mo_1325754.jpg" }, "description": "10 Jon Stewart quotes by Chris Smith. 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