---
title: "373 Jerry Quotes by 308 authors"
description: "Browse 373 Jerry quotes by 308 authors. Discover the best Jerry sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/janet-evanovich-291_days_only-men-you-can-count-on-these-days-are_2142319.png"
---

> [Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-evanovich/only-men-you-can-count-on-these-days-are-ben-and-jerry/)

[Janet Evanovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-evanovich/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/janet-evanovich-291_days_only-men-you-can-count-on-these-days-are_2142319.png)

> [Jerry Orbach is just phenomenal. He is genius, so present.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-cudlitz/jerry-orbach-is-just-phenomenal-he-is-genius-so-present/)

[Michael Cudlitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-cudlitz/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b54/michael-cudlitz-15602_genius_jerry-orbach-is-just-phenomenal-he-is-ge_1128946.jpg)

> [Its been 70+ years, Tom. Youre never going to eat Jerry :)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danish/its-been-70-years-tom-youre-never-going-to-eat-jerry/)

[Danish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danish/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/454/danish-5036_cartoons_its-been-70-years-tom-youre-never-going_234528.jpg)

> [We decided to redefine the bottom line at Ben & Jerry's](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ben-cohen/we-decided-to-redefine-the-bottom-line-at-ben-jerry-s/)

[Ben Cohen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ben-cohen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e9/ben-cohen-31715_bottom_we-decided-to-redefine-the-bottom-line-a_1333101.jpg)

> [Jerry Trainor is one of the funniest people on the planet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-schneider/jerry-trainor-is-one-of-the-funniest-people-on-the-planet/)

[Dan Schneider](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-schneider/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/574/dan-schneider-11092_funniest_jerry-trainor-is-one-of-the-funniest-peo_2690808.jpg)

> [His voice carried authority the way Ben & Jerry's carries calories.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-white/his-voice-carried-authority-the-way-ben-jerry-s-carries-calories/)

[Stephen White](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-white/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cde/stephen-white-35008_authority_his-voice-carried-authority-the-way-ben_1937218.png)

> [Hey, everybody, Jerry Maguire's here.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-elizabeth-phillips/hey-everybody-jerry-maguire-s-here/)

[Susan Elizabeth Phillips](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-elizabeth-phillips/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd6/susan-elizabeth-phillips-815_hey_hey-everybody-jerry-maguire-s-here-19330_1933014.jpg)

> [Oh, Jerry, don't let's ask for the moonwe have the stars.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/oh-jerry-don-t-let-s-ask-for-the-moonwe-have-the-stars/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db4/anonymous-1_astronomy_oh-jerry-don-t-let-s-ask-for-the-moonwe_75979.jpg)

> [Jerry: Oh, you don't understand, Osgood! Ehhhh... I'm a man. Osgood: Well, nobody's perfect.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/billy-wilder/jerry-oh-you-don-t-understand-osgood-ehhhh-i-m-a-man-osgood-well/)

[Billy Wilder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/billy-wilder/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd6/billy-wilder-8818_jerry_jerry-oh-you-don-t-understand-osgood-ehh_804896.jpg)

> [Jerry Falwell can go straight to hell - and I mean that in a Christian way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-carter/jerry-falwell-can-go-straight-to-hell-and-i-mean-that-in-a-christian/)

[Jimmy Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-carter/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa8/jimmy-carter-479_christian_jerry-falwell-can-go-straight-to-hell-an_966660.jpg)

> [It was smashing working with Jerry Desmonde, he was a very nice chap.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/norman-wisdom/it-was-smashing-working-with-jerry-desmonde-he-was-a-very-nice-chap/)

[Norman Wisdom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/norman-wisdom/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/71e/norman-wisdom-15637_chaps_it-was-smashing-working-with-jerry-desmo_457704.jpg)

> [ \[Comedian Jerry Seinfeld was nominated for a Grammy for his spoken-word children's album\] Halloween... Don't Give Up on Me. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jamie-lee-curtis/comedian-jerry-seinfeld-was-nominated-for-a-grammy-for-his-spoken/)

[Jamie Lee Curtis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jamie-lee-curtis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc6/jamie-lee-curtis-3771_albums_comedian-jerry-seinfeld-was-nominated-fo_3080165.jpg)

> [I'm no Jerry Seinfeld. I wasn't raised with some backyard with a creek and trees and all that.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracy-morgan/i-m-no-jerry-seinfeld-i-wasn-t-raised-with-some-backyard-with-a-creek/)

[Tracy Morgan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tracy-morgan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d2a/tracy-morgan-1210_backyard_i-m-no-jerry-seinfeld-i-wasn-t-raised-wi_3139576.jpg)

> [Jerry Krause must have pictures of his boss's wife having sex with a monkey.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-barkley/jerry-krause-must-have-pictures-of-his-boss-s-wife-having-sex-with-a/)

[Charles Barkley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-barkley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/675/charles-barkley-1266_boss_jerry-krause-must-have-pictures-of-his-b_2739816.png)

> [Jerry Brisco, who is a WWE Hall of Famer, goes out and scouts all of the amateur wrestling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-regal/jerry-brisco-who-is-a-wwe-hall-of-famer-goes-out-and-scouts-all-of/)

[William Regal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-regal/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d32/william-regal-6872_jerry_jerry-brisco-who-is-a-wwe-hall-of-famer_2337430.jpg)

> [Hell and damnation, life is such fun with a ragged greatcoat and a Jerry gun!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-blok/hell-and-damnation-life-is-such-fun-with-a-ragged-greatcoat-and-a/)

[Alexander Blok](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-blok/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/659/alexander-blok-41810_damnation_hell-and-damnation-life-is-such-fun-with_2778445.jpg)

> [While liberals appeared to be safely in power, feminists could perhaps afford the luxury of defining Larry Flynt or Roman Polanski as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellen-willis/while-liberals-appeared-to-be-safely-in-power-feminists-could-perhaps/)

[Ellen Willis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellen-willis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/632/ellen-willis-14968_defining_while-liberals-appeared-to-be-safely-in_2227192.png)

> [Jerry Falwell says, on Pat Robertson's program, that the reason we got attacked on 9/11 is that we were accommodating the ACLU…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-shelby-spong/jerry-falwell-says-on-pat-robertson-s-program-that-the-reason-we-got/)

[John Shelby Spong](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-shelby-spong/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/796/john-shelby-spong-1488_abortion_jerry-falwell-says-on-pat-robertson-s-pr_3193519.png)

> [I danced in a company of 'West Side Story' when I was very young. It was most of the original cast -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/teri-garr/i-danced-in-a-company-of-west-side-story-when-i-was-very-young-it-was/)

[Teri Garr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/teri-garr/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b74/teri-garr-13679_business_i-danced-in-a-company-of-west-side-story_169374.jpg)

> [Without question, Jerry 'The King' Lawler is my most recognizable partner and my favorite to work with over the years. We endured…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-ross/without-question-jerry-the-king-lawler-is-my-most-recognizable/)

[Jim Ross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-ross/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/01a/jim-ross-3336_good_without-question-jerry-the-king-lawler-i_2432876.jpg)

> [John McCain, who once called Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson 'forces of evil', has now come out for teaching intelligent design. That…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/john-mccain-who-once-called-jerry-falwell-and-pat-robertson-forces-of/)

[Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/492/bill-maher-211_design_john-mccain-who-once-called-jerry-falwel_782562.png)

> [A new sickness invaded Jerry, the sickness of knowing what he had become, another animal, another beast, another violent person in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-cormier/a-new-sickness-invaded-jerry-the-sickness-of-knowing-what-he-had/)

[Robert Cormier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-cormier/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54c/robert-cormier-6436_animal_a-new-sickness-invaded-jerry-the-sicknes_2533271.jpg)

> [I don't have 'The Jerry Springer Show'. I just got 'Family Feud', but some of them families, when they lose, man, they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-harvey/i-don-t-have-the-jerry-springer-show-i-just-got-family-feud-but-some/)

[Steve Harvey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-harvey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/348/steve-harvey-1668_behinds_i-don-t-have-the-jerry-springer-show-i-j_400743.jpg)

> [Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-bamberger/swinging-at-daisies-is-like-playing-electric-guitar-with-a-tennis/)

[Michael Bamberger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-bamberger/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/691/michael-bamberger-76805_balls_swinging-at-daisies-is-like-playing-elec_660522.jpg)

> [“We had a very Tom and Jerry relationship, me and my mom. She was the strict disciplinarian; I was naughty as shit.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trevor-noah/we-had-a-very-tom-and-jerry-relationship-me-and-my-mom-she-was-the/)

[Trevor Noah](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trevor-noah/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c30/trevor-noah-1603_street-fighter_we-had-a-very-tom-and-jerry-relationship_1101778.jpg)

> [A Separation is another film that I think is extraordinary, and one of those things that feels like it's from another planet,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jake-gyllenhaal/a-separation-is-another-film-that-i-think-is-extraordinary-and-one-of/)

[Jake Gyllenhaal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jake-gyllenhaal/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/22a/jake-gyllenhaal-2014_aliens_a-separation-is-another-film-that-i-thin_1041055.jpg)

> [I went to high school right outside Dallas, and (songwriter and performer) Michael Martin Murphey was a senior there when I was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-wylie-hubbard/i-went-to-high-school-right-outside-dallas-and-songwriter-and/)

[Ray Wylie Hubbard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-wylie-hubbard/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45e/ray-wylie-hubbard-48986_acoustic-music_i-went-to-high-school-right-outside-dall_3221177.jpg)

> [The fact is Jerry Weintraub, the handsome, bearish movie producer, the man with the long career, who worked with Arthur Godfrey and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rich-cohen/the-fact-is-jerry-weintraub-the-handsome-bearish-movie-producer-the/)

[Rich Cohen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rich-cohen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b71/rich-cohen-26170_anything_the-fact-is-jerry-weintraub-the-handsome_2426391.jpg)

> [So much business is based on the belief that we should do whatever we can within legal limits to make as much…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-greenfield/so-much-business-is-based-on-the-belief-that-we-should-do-whatever-we/)

[Jerry Greenfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-greenfield/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/847/jerry-greenfield-20556_belief_so-much-business-is-based-on-the-belief_126272.jpg)

> [Jerry Sloan was a guy that I always respected, but I thought he was mean. Like, he was a guy that was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/penny-hardaway/jerry-sloan-was-a-guy-that-i-always-respected-but-i-thought-he-was/)

[Penny Hardaway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/penny-hardaway/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b27/penny-hardaway-8364_always_jerry-sloan-was-a-guy-that-i-always-resp_2144633.jpg)

> [Getting back to the point, a guy like Jerry, he deals with the business, and he doesn't see it as being evil…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/trevor-rabin/getting-back-to-the-point-a-guy-like-jerry-he-deals-with-the-business/)

[Trevor Rabin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/trevor-rabin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b0/trevor-rabin-17727_business_getting-back-to-the-point-a-guy-like-jer_1261088.png)

> [I tell you what: I bet Jerry Jones would not trade places with a 75-year black man in Chicago. I bet Joel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-sharpe/i-tell-you-what-i-bet-jerry-jones-would-not-trade-places-with-a-75/)

[Shannon Sharpe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-sharpe/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/908/shannon-sharpe-4881_america_i-tell-you-what-i-bet-jerry-jones-would_1960128.png)

> [I am pleased as punch no longer to believe in a god who declares reason a sin, who will not choose many…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ruth-hurmence-green/i-am-pleased-as-punch-no-longer-to-believe-in-a-god-who-declares/)

[Ruth Hurmence Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ruth-hurmence-green/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ab/ruth-hurmence-green-28287_atheism_i-am-pleased-as-punch-no-longer-to-belie_933661.png)

> [I remember thinking as I was doing the jokes for the first time, "If I can hear that very clearly, I'm not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-rogen/i-remember-thinking-as-i-was-doing-the-jokes-for-the-first-time-if-i/)

[Seth Rogen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-rogen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2f/seth-rogen-1831_bombs_i-remember-thinking-as-i-was-doing-the-j_1711528.jpg)

> [I don't like my wrestling or entertainment in general to be too clean or predictable for me as a fan. When I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-ambrose/i-don-t-like-my-wrestling-or-entertainment-in-general-to-be-too-clean/)

[Dean Ambrose](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-ambrose/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ff3/dean-ambrose-4338_attitude_i-don-t-like-my-wrestling-or-entertainme_2293502.jpg)

> [Jerry Falwell knows who caused the terrorist attack on America: the ACLU. "The ACLU's got to take a lot of blame for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wendy-kaminer/jerry-falwell-knows-who-caused-the-terrorist-attack-on-america-the/)

[Wendy Kaminer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wendy-kaminer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/922/wendy-kaminer-16305_america_jerry-falwell-knows-who-caused-the-terro_3180147.jpg)

> [“I did not think of myself as a violent man. But the more times we were attacked, the more lives we lost,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noah-galloway/i-did-not-think-of-myself-as-a-violent-man-but-the-more-times-we-were/)

[Noah Galloway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noah-galloway/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b20/noah-galloway-8545_jerry_i-did-not-think-of-myself-as-a-violent-m_2331264.jpg)

> [One of the reasons I'm lucky is to be around an owner like Jerry Jones. I'm not just saying it. The reality…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tony-romo/one-of-the-reasons-i-m-lucky-is-to-be-around-an-owner-like-jerry/)

[Tony Romo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tony-romo/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dfa/tony-romo-19588_battle_one-of-the-reasons-i-m-lucky-is-to-be-ar_634455.jpg)

> [Hi, folks, I'm Jerry Gross. No, I'm not, I'm Jerry Coleman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-coleman/hi-folks-i-m-jerry-gross-no-i-m-not-i-m-jerry-coleman/)

[Jerry Coleman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-coleman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2e5/jerry-coleman-3591_folks_hi-folks-i-m-jerry-gross-no-i-m-not-i-m_2501867.png)

> [Jerry Ford is so dumb he can't fart and chew gum at the same time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lyndon-b-johnson/jerry-ford-is-so-dumb-he-can-t-fart-and-chew-gum-at-the-same-time/)

[Lyndon B. Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lyndon-b-johnson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/05b/lyndon-b-johnson-684_dumb_jerry-ford-is-so-dumb-he-can-t-fart-and_2520565.png)

## Top authors on Jerry

- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b013/author-jerry-greenfield-49087.jpg) Jerry Greenfield 9 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jerry/jerry-greenfield/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b013/author-joe-shuster-50546.jpg) Joe Shuster 6 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jerry/joe-shuster/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b023/author-tim-lahaye-90903.jpg) Tim LaHaye 5 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jerry/tim-lahaye/)
- [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b018/author-norman-lear-71983.jpg) Norman Lear 5 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jerry/norman-lear/)
- [Max von Essen 5 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/jerry/max-von-essen/)

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                        "text": "Without question, Jerry 'The King' Lawler is my most recognizable partner and my favorite to work with over the years. We endured several things together that reach far beyond merely signing on and subsequently saying 'good night everybody' at the end of the show.",
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                        "text": "John McCain, who once called Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson 'forces of evil', has now come out for teaching intelligent design. That is sad, when smart people have to pretend to be so dumb to get elected.",
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                        "text": "A new sickness invaded Jerry, the sickness of knowing what he had become, another animal, another beast, another violent person in a violent world, inflicting damage, not disturbing the universe but damaging it.",
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                        "text": "I don't have 'The Jerry Springer Show'. I just got 'Family Feud', but some of them families, when they lose, man, they have some real conversations with each other back behind that wall, but I've never been involved in any of them.",
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                        "text": "Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry Garcia. The ball changes everything.",
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                        "text": "“We had a very Tom and Jerry relationship, me and my mom. She was the strict disciplinarian; I was naughty as shit. She would send me out to buy groceries, and I wouldn’t come right home because I’d be using the change from the milk and bread to play arcade games at the supermarket. I loved videogames. I was a master at Street Fighter. I could go forever on a single play. I’d drop a coin in, time would fly, and the next thing I knew there’d be a woman behind me with a belt. It was”",
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                        "text": "A Separation is another film that I think is extraordinary, and one of those things that feels like it's from another planet, much like Terrence Malick's movies did: at a certain point, you feel like he's an alien from another planet telling us and looking at us and showing us how we are. I also really, really love Jerry McGuire.",
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                        "text": "I went to high school right outside Dallas, and (songwriter and performer) Michael Martin Murphey was a senior there when I was a sophomore or junior, really into folk and acoustic music. Larry Gross, who's the host of \"Mountain Stage\" on public radio, and B.W. Stevenson, also a musician, were there at the same time, too. Michael was a big inspiration -- through him I discovered Woody Guthrie, Dylan, Jimmy Rogers. Then I ran into Jerry Jeff Walker there in Dallas back when he was just a folk singer. Those are my earliest influences.",
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                        "text": "The fact is Jerry Weintraub, the handsome, bearish movie producer, the man with the long career, who worked with Arthur Godfrey and Elvis Presley and Frank Sinatra and George Clooney, is a great storyteller - he's this as much as he's anything else. He takes time telling stories, too.",
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                        "text": "So much business is based on the belief that we should do whatever we can within legal limits to make as much money as we can. Ben & Jerry's was based on values, and we try to operate a business that not just sells ice cream but partners with all our stakeholders - whether that's suppliers or customers - to bring about a more sustainable world.",
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                        "text": "Jerry Sloan was a guy that I always respected, but I thought he was mean. Like, he was a guy that was just no nonsense. When coach and I got closer during the Olympics, I said, 'Coach, I always just thought you were this mean guy, but it was really nice to get to know you and your family.'",
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                        "text": "Getting back to the point, a guy like Jerry, he deals with the business, and he doesn't see it as being evil or ugly, it's what you have to do, and I mean I know there's some really ugly parts to it and parts which drive me nuts, but not in the same way as music business.",
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                        "text": "I tell you what: I bet Jerry Jones would not trade places with a 75-year black man in Chicago. I bet Joel Klatt would not trade places with a 30-year old black guy from Chicago or Watts. I bet he wouldn't do that. You know why? It's great to know that I'm white and a male in America.",
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                        "text": "I am pleased as punch no longer to believe in a god who declares reason a sin, who will not choose many noble and great and wise things but has chosen the base things of the world, the foolish things, the weak things and the things which are not. A god who can choose his companions in eternity and prefers Jerry Falwell and Tammy Bakker over Albert Einstein and Marie Curie. I am no longer a fool for Christ's sake. And I have no more desire to be a sheep than to be a fool. It is possible to pull out justification for imposing your will on others, simply by calling your will God's will.",
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                        "text": "I remember thinking as I was doing the jokes for the first time, \"If I can hear that very clearly, I'm not hearing laughter.\" It just became deafening, this buzzing noise. I mean, it was brutal. It was really terrible. Then I remember thinking, \"At least nobody important, or anyone who I really respect, saw that.\" And then literally right when I went off the stage, Jerry Seinfeld got up and went on. So I was like, \"Oh great. Seinfeld saw me bomb.\" On the other hand, I thought, \"At least no one will be thinking of me anymore. They'll just be focusing on him.\"",
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                        "text": "I don't like my wrestling or entertainment in general to be too clean or predictable for me as a fan. When I say clean, I'm not talking about dirty jokes, middle fingers and stuff like that. I'm actually not even a big fan of that. A lot of people talk about the attitude era being so great but a lot of it was terrible crap, sex jokes and over-the-top terrible bad comedy. It was Jerry Springer-like. They made a joke about a woman's breasts. Hilarious, but where's the wrestling? I look back on a lot of stuff now, and I'm like where's the wrestling? It's just a lot of crappy jokes.",
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                        "text": "Jerry Falwell knows who caused the terrorist attack on America: the ACLU. \"The ACLU's got to take a lot of blame for this,\" he declared on the 700 Club, because, he explained, the ACLU, abetted by the federal courts is responsible for \"throwing God out of the public square (and) the public schools.\" This is a familiar charge and a false one. God is still present in the public schools, where students are free to pray, alone or in groups, so long as their prayers aren't officially sponsored and don't infringe on anyone's freedom not to pray.",
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                        "text": "“I did not think of myself as a violent man. But the more times we were attacked, the more lives we lost, the harder it was to keep those demons at bay. It was another moment I found myself thankful to have Jerry. He was the rational, intelligent one. He kept me from letting the anger completely consume me and from doing anything really stupid. He prevented me from running wild through the streets of Yusafiah. But it was clear I was losing my grip on reality. One evening I was on the roof of a building at an intersection in some little town. I wasn’t wearing my helmet or my vest. I was just in a T-shirt. The roofs were flat and there was about a two-foot-high wall at the ledge. I stood there with my right foot propped up on the wall and looked out at the little town. I felt fueled with power. Like I was having the ultimate manly man moment. I could see then why people say power is addictive. I felt high on it in that moment. All my life I had strived to be “manly.” Everything I did was about being “the man.” And in that moment that is how I felt: completely dominant. As I stood on that roof unprotected and not giving a shit, I looked out over the town and said to myself, but as if I were talking to all of them, “Work with me or against me. I can either destroy you or I can help you.” I believed every word of that. Nothing could touch me. No one could hurt me. I was completely invincible.”",
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                        "text": "One of the reasons I'm lucky is to be around an owner like Jerry Jones. I'm not just saying it. The reality of it is the guy wants to win. As a quarterback, you need ownership and people in the front office and organization to help you win. If you don't get that help, you're always going to be fighting an uphill battle. You feel that, being a part of this organization with Jerry, that he's going to bring in people and sign people and want to improve this football team every year. It allows you to feel like, hey, we have a chance and I have a chance to do some special things around here.",
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                        "text": "Hi, folks, I'm Jerry Gross. No, I'm not, I'm Jerry Coleman.",
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                        "text": "Jerry Ford is so dumb he can't fart and chew gum at the same time.",
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