---
title: "20 Ifs Quotes By Steven Morrissey"
description: "20 Ifs quotes by Steven Morrissey. Plus more from Steven Morrissey and more Ifs sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e3c/steven-morrissey-3913_colourful_life-would-be-so-colourful-if-only-i-had_2578173.png"
---

> [Life would be so colourful if only I had a drink problem.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/life-would-be-so-colourful-if-only-i-had-a-drink-problem/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e3c/steven-morrissey-3913_colourful_life-would-be-so-colourful-if-only-i-had_2578173.png)

> [If you respect or love animals you could never eat them. It's that simple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/if-you-respect-or-love-animals-you-could-never-eat-them-it-s-that/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/47d/steven-morrissey-3913_animal_if-you-respect-or-love-animals-you-could_2577583.png)

> [And if I seem a little strange Well, that's because I am](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/and-if-i-seem-a-little-strange-well-that-s-because-i-am/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e64/steven-morrissey-3913_ifs_and-if-i-seem-a-little-strange-well-that_1741403.png)

> [If met Vic Reeves, I'd have no desire other than to smack him in the face.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/if-met-vic-reeves-i-d-have-no-desire-other-than-to-smack-him-in-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2db/steven-morrissey-3913_desire_if-met-vic-reeves-i-d-have-no-desire-oth_2955848.png)

> [If a double-decker bus Crashes into us To die by your side... The pleasure - the privilege is mine.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/if-a-double-decker-bus-crashes-into-us-to-die-by-your-side-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c90/steven-morrissey-3913_bus_if-a-double-decker-bus-crashes-into-us-t_1294142.png)

> [I could only tolerate an afternoon if I took a triple amount of the stated dose of valium prescribed by my GP…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-could-only-tolerate-an-afternoon-if-i-took-a-triple-amount-of-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f61/steven-morrissey-3913_afternoon_i-could-only-tolerate-an-afternoon-if-i_1231477.jpg)

> [All human activity is fruitless when pitted against the girls and boys singing on pop television, for they have found the answer…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/all-human-activity-is-fruitless-when-pitted-against-the-girls-and/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/051/steven-morrissey-3913_activity_all-human-activity-is-fruitless-when-pit_2496239.png)

> [I have an unswayable obsession with death. If there was a magical pill that one could take that would retire you from…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-have-an-unswayable-obsession-with-death-if-there-was-a-magical-pill/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e96/steven-morrissey-3913_death_i-have-an-unswayable-obsession-with-deat_353722.png)

> [In England, pop music seems now to be exclusively for children. If an artist is no good, why is it necessary to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/in-england-pop-music-seems-now-to-be-exclusively-for-children-if-an/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a9/steven-morrissey-3913_art_in-england-pop-music-seems-now-to-be-exc_194971.png)

> [Animals are nicer than humans and they're conscious beings. If you stick your grandmother in an oven, she will probably be tasty.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/animals-are-nicer-than-humans-and-they-re-conscious-beings-if-you/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f52/steven-morrissey-3913_animal_animals-are-nicer-than-humans-and-they-r_1918510.png)

> [Denmark is sadly a hellish place if you happen to be a pig, but the brioche and fruits that tower on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/denmark-is-sadly-a-hellish-place-if-you-happen-to-be-a-pig-but-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d8d/steven-morrissey-3913_denmark_denmark-is-sadly-a-hellish-place-if-you_2054514.png)

> [Popular music is slowly being laid to rest in every conceivable way... the ashes are already about us if we could but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/popular-music-is-slowly-being-laid-to-rest-in-every-conceivable-way/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2b0/steven-morrissey-3913_ashes_popular-music-is-slowly-being-laid-to-re_3175168.png)

> [ \[Sigmund Freud\] just made people feel so neurotic about their lives. I mean, if you dreamt about a lampshade, it meant you… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/sigmund-freud-just-made-people-feel-so-neurotic-about-their-lives-i/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/51d/steven-morrissey-3913_feels_sigmund-freud-just-made-people-feel-so-n_1756776.png)

> [Whenever I’d overhear how people found me to be ‘a bit much’ (which is the gentle way of saying the word ‘unbearable’),…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/whenever-i-d-overhear-how-people-found-me-to-be-a-bit-much-which-is/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb9/steven-morrissey-3913_able_whenever-i-d-overhear-how-people-found-m_2479986.png)

> [The fascinating thing about human beings is that they don't last, and everything eventuates, and everything is very, very brief. And even…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/the-fascinating-thing-about-human-beings-is-that-they-don-t-last-and/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1fa/steven-morrissey-3913_age_the-fascinating-thing-about-human-beings_1167740.png)

> [I am still my teenage self. If you think that we all step through a door marked Adult, or that we sign…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-am-still-my-teenage-self-if-you-think-that-we-all-step-through-a/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c6/steven-morrissey-3913_adult_i-am-still-my-teenage-self-if-you-think_1479401.png)

> [I think I'm a realist. Which people who don't like me consider to be pessimism. It isn't pessimism at all. If I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-think-i-m-a-realist-which-people-who-don-t-like-me-consider-to-be/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/299/steven-morrissey-3913_don-t-like-me_i-think-i-m-a-realist-which-people-who-d_461493.png)

> [I never enjoyed life in my twenties, not one minute of it. It was a test of endurance that I'm surprised I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-never-enjoyed-life-in-my-twenties-not-one-minute-of-it-it-was-a/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0bf/steven-morrissey-3913_courses_i-never-enjoyed-life-in-my-twenties-not_1237624.png)

> [I have so much pride and love for the songs of The Smiths. However, I must ask you, if you come across…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-have-so-much-pride-and-love-for-the-songs-of-the-smiths-however-i/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e7/steven-morrissey-3913_and-love_i-have-so-much-pride-and-love-for-the-so_200802.jpg)

> [Bring me the head of Elton John . . . which is one instance in which meat would not be murder, if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/bring-me-the-head-of-elton-john-which-is-one-instance-in-which-meat/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/338/steven-morrissey-3913_elton-john_bring-me-the-head-of-elton-john-which-is_476209.png)

## Other authors on Ifs

## More by Steven Morrissey

> [He referred to me as an 'insufferable puffed-up prat'. This is a bit rich coming from a man who actually married his own mother.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/he-referred-to-me-as-an-insufferable-puffed-up-prat-this-is-a-bit/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I think labels for the most part want to sign new discoveries so that that label alone is seen to be responsible for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-think-labels-for-the-most-part-want-to-sign-new-discoveries-so-that/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I find shoes difficult to be ethical about...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-find-shoes-difficult-to-be-ethical-about/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Eating meat is the most disgusting thing I can think of. It's like biting into your grandmother.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/eating-meat-is-the-most-disgusting-thing-i-can-think-of-it-s-like/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Sometimes I wish I was just a simple drunkard.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/sometimes-i-wish-i-was-just-a-simple-drunkard/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Even with the recent story about the nurse killing herself in King Edward Hospital, there's no blame placed on Kate Middleton, who was in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/even-with-the-recent-story-about-the-nurse-killing-herself-in-king/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [In England, pop music seems now to be exclusively for children. If an artist is no good, why is it necessary to have that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/in-england-pop-music-seems-now-to-be-exclusively-for-children-if-an/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I have so much pride and love for the songs of The Smiths. However, I must ask you, if you come across any Smiths…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-have-so-much-pride-and-love-for-the-songs-of-the-smiths-however-i/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Bob Geldof is a nauseating character. Band Aid was the most self-righteous platform ever in the history of popular music.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/bob-geldof-is-a-nauseating-character-band-aid-was-the-most-self/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [But sometimes I'd feel more fulfilled making Christmas cards with the mentally ill. I want to live and I want to love. I want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/but-sometimes-i-d-feel-more-fulfilled-making-christmas-cards-with-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Shyness is nice, but shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life that you'd like to.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/shyness-is-nice-but-shyness-can-stop-you-from-doing-all-the-things-in/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I think I must be, absolutely, a total sex object. In every sense of the word.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-think-i-must-be-absolutely-a-total-sex-object-in-every-sense-of-the/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I have an unswayable obsession with death. If there was a magical pill that one could take that would retire you from the world,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-have-an-unswayable-obsession-with-death-if-there-was-a-magical-pill/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [I can smell burning flesh... and I hope to God it's human.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/i-can-smell-burning-flesh-and-i-hope-to-god-it-s-human/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

> [Everyday is like Sunday Everyday is silent and grey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-morrissey/everyday-is-like-sunday-everyday-is-silent-and-grey/)

[Steven Morrissey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-morrissey/)

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                        "text": "All human activity is fruitless when pitted against the girls and boys singing on pop television, for they have found the answer as the rest of us search for the question. I will sing, too. If not, I will have to die.",
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                        "text": "Denmark is sadly a hellish place if you happen to be a pig, but the brioche and fruits that tower on the table before me have me hastily attaching a feedbag.",
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                        "text": "Popular music is slowly being laid to rest in every conceivable way... the ashes are already about us if we could but notice them.",
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                        "text": "[Sigmund Freud] just made people feel so neurotic about their lives. I mean, if you dreamt about a lampshade, it meant you wanted to be whipped by the local vicar or something.",
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                        "text": "Whenever I’d overhear how people found me to be ‘a bit much’ (which is the gentle way of saying the word ‘unbearable’), I understood why. To myself I would say: Well, yes of course I’m a bit much — if I weren’t, I would not be lit up by so many lights.",
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                        "text": "The fascinating thing about human beings is that they don't last, and everything eventuates, and everything is very, very brief. And even if you do manage to look reasonably well as you age, unfortunately you are attacked at every level by illness and so forth. It's a fact of life.",
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                        "text": "I am still my teenage self. If you think that we all step through a door marked Adult, or that we sign a Grown-Up Document, you’re quite wrong. We remain as we always were, and that, alas, is one of life’s many nasty tricks.",
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                        "text": "I never enjoyed life in my twenties, not one minute of it. It was a test of endurance that I'm surprised I survived. Professionally, of course, I was doing very well but personally it couldn't have been worse or more difficult for me if I'd been living in a mud hut in Leeds.",
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                        "text": "I have so much pride and love for the songs of The Smiths. However, I must ask you, if you come across any Smiths CDs, don't buy them, because all the money goes to that wretched drummer.",
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                        "text": "Bring me the head of Elton John . . . which is one instance in which meat would not be murder, if it were served on a plate.",
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}
```