---
title: "44 Ifs Quotes By Dov Davidoff"
description: "44 Ifs quotes by Dov Davidoff. Plus more from Dov Davidoff and more Ifs sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg"
---

> [America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-person-she-d-need-a-co-signer/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg)

> [If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-advice-for-prostitutes-but-no/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/428/dov-davidoff-1381_advice_if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-ad_2014351.jpg)

> [Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to-drive-or-think-or-talk-or/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/dov-davidoff-1381_driving_lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to_885944.jpg)

> [Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re-going-to-end-it-do-so-at-a/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41f/dov-davidoff-1381_ends_suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re_2767356.jpg)

> [Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially-if-you-live-together/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64d/dov-davidoff-1381_crime_domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially_1414753.jpg)

> [If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-have-to-be-really-comfortable/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e6e/dov-davidoff-1381_comfortable_if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-ha_1445839.jpg)

> [Dating a white girl is like dating a black girl if she were really passive-agressive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-black-girl-if-she-were-really/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/905/dov-davidoff-1381_agressive_dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-bla_2295368.jpg)

> [Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/water-polo-would-be-much-more-interesting-if-they-hadn-t-gotten-rid/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a41/dov-davidoff-1381_horse_water-polo-would-be-much-more-interestin_1210350.jpg)

> [My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natural-causes-the-cops-would-be/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6cf/dov-davidoff-1381_bedroom_my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natu_2271113.jpg)

> [Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-at-the-right-time-can-fuel-one/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa5/dov-davidoff-1381_break_break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-a_25718.jpg)

> [I wonder if anybody ever decided to commit suicide, then thought; but first I'm going to stop by that taco place I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-commit-suicide-then-thought-but/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/151/dov-davidoff-1381_commit_i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-comm_979979.jpg)

> [Upside of being an attractive woman; if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-you-re-remotely-intelligent/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f3f/dov-davidoff-1381_attractive_upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-y_3108461.jpg)

> [If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serious-dowry-i-m-talking-goats/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a5/dov-davidoff-1381_chickens_if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serio_2332456.jpg)

> [If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-not-saying-i-d-make-it-to-the/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24c/dov-davidoff-1381_chance_if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-n_3015432.jpg)

> [Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-straight-guys-do-if-one-of-the/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/dov-davidoff-1381_gay_gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-strai_1539857.jpg)

> [Just saw a t-shirt at the gym said, body by torture. That's a lot less ironic if you're a political prisoner in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body-by-torture-that-s-a-lot-less/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea7/dov-davidoff-1381_body_just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body_2612982.jpg)

> [What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-and-the-guys-goes-sex/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e5/dov-davidoff-1381_addiction_what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-a_2598212.jpg)

> [You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-if-i-get-a-girl-home-and-she/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0dc/dov-davidoff-1381_assuming_you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-i_838441.jpg)

> [If procrastination were a marketable skill, I'd be a real hot commodity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-skill-i-d-be-a-real-hot-commodity/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35e/dov-davidoff-1381_commodity_if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-ski_1052761.jpg)

> [I'd spend more time with you if you were less like you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were-less-like-you/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f1/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were_1906889.jpg)

> [Nothing good about the sun if you're trying to watch television with out curtains.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-trying-to-watch-television-with/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/116/dov-davidoff-1381_curtains_nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-try_2630258.jpg)

> [If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-death/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc8/dov-davidoff-1381_death_if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-de_2208421.jpg)

> [Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the-people-that-sold-it-looked/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/86f/dov-davidoff-1381_health_health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the_1814593.jpg)

> [Comedy is a cruel mistress, especially if you're already seeing a really cruel mistress.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if-you-re-already-seeing-a/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/612/dov-davidoff-1381_comedy_comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if_1679353.jpg)

> [I'd find myself more interesting if I weren't with me all the time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-weren-t-with-me-all-the-time/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2ed/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-we_2319887.jpg)

> [I'd like you much better if you didn't like yourself so much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-like-yourself-so-much/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bea/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-l_1247945.jpg)

> [Quality thoughts will turn their back on you if you don't treat them with respect.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on-you-if-you-don-t-treat-them/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/692/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on_764831.jpg)

> [When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if-i-had-a-girl-i-would-treat/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8dd/dov-davidoff-1381_girl_when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if_1980657.jpg)

> [I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-finding-work-as-a-spiritual-guru/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d5f/dov-davidoff-1381_economy_i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-fin_2814643.jpg)

> [If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-response-is-what-the-hell-are/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93d/dov-davidoff-1381_close-friends_if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-res_3187400.jpg)

> [If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-material-wealth-leads-to-happiness/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/dov-davidoff-1381_adults_if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-mater_1462676.jpg)

> [Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ever-tried-to-wrestle-a-duvet/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac2/dov-davidoff-1381_awful_being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ev_2758197.jpg)

> [If you spend a lot of time shopping for athletic clothes, you may want to consider spending less time thinking about high…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for-athletic-clothes-you-may-want/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a2/dov-davidoff-1381_athletic_if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for_2537862.jpg)

> [If I were a bad black comic I would name my special, Yo mama, and other stories of a lack of self…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name-my-special-yo-mama-and-other/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/582/dov-davidoff-1381_awareness_if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name_1312495.jpg)

> [I don't know about you, but I like to fall in love on Mondays. This way if things go south right away…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fall-in-love-on-mondays-this-way/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f0c/dov-davidoff-1381_fall_i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fal_437536.jpg)

> [Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person-you-re-dating-and-get-the/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/413/dov-davidoff-1381_dating_is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person_2998921.jpg)

> [If I were a gynecologist, I'd say things like, Okay, enough of the small talk. Let's check under the hood.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things-like-okay-enough-of-the-small/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3de/dov-davidoff-1381_checks_if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things_2780347.jpg)

> [If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-his-memory-celebrated-through/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/733/dov-davidoff-1381_cream_if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-h_3187304.jpg)

> [If you carry a paperback book in your back pocket, but spend more time on your hair than you do reading it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-back-pocket-but-spend-more-time/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/dov-davidoff-1381_actor_if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-ba_2590310.jpg)

> [Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot-he-had-nothing-to-do-with-it/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d78/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot_1702637.jpg)

## Other authors on Ifs

## More by Dov Davidoff

> [I'm endlessly amazed by what people are capable of, and incapable of.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-m-endlessly-amazed-by-what-people-are-capable-of-and-incapable-of/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-at-the-right-time-can-fuel-one/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [People that say I have a 'fear of commitment' don't understand my relationship with popcorn.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/people-that-say-i-have-a-fear-of-commitment-don-t-understand-my/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/nike-store-won-t-accept-my-starbucks-card-as-payment-come-on-guys/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/living-by-the-beach-means-feeling-guilty-about-never-going-to-the/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/most-public-bathrooms-now-have-automatic-toilet-sensors-people-can-t/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [At the gym; I've given up trying to get in really good shape, and re-committed myself to not getting any worse.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/at-the-gym-i-ve-given-up-trying-to-get-in-really-good-shape-and-re/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [All politicians promise that which they cannot deliver. I just wish they did so less gleefully.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/all-politicians-promise-that-which-they-cannot-deliver-i-just-wish/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/being-anti-social-can-also-mean-that-you-re-aware-of-how-annoying-it/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/life-is-fragile-unless-your-in-the-nfl-in-which-case-you-ll-need-to/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [I like to be able to connect with people. And that's how I connect, right away. I like to really talk to somebody. To…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-like-to-be-able-to-connect-with-people-and-that-s-how-i-connect/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Fake titties are inversely proportioned to their owners level of self esteem. This being said, part of me loves them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/fake-titties-are-inversely-proportioned-to-their-owners-level-of-self/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [It's a shame that physical beauty often has such a negative effect on its occupant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/it-s-a-shame-that-physical-beauty-often-has-such-a-negative-effect-on/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/hanging-out-with-women-on-a-platonic-level-is-like-spending-time-with/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

> [Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/life-is-what-you-make-of-it-unless-you-have-tourette-s-in-which-case/)

[Dov Davidoff](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dov-davidoff/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "ItemList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/#itemlist",
            "name": "44 Ifs Quotes By Dov Davidoff",
            "numberOfItems": 40,
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-person-she-d-need-a-co-signer/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-advice-for-prostitutes-but-no/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/428/dov-davidoff-1381_advice_if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-ad_2014351.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/428/dov-davidoff-1381_advice_if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-ad_2014351.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/428/dov-davidoff-1381_advice_if-you-got-it-flaunt-it-may-be-decent-ad_2014351.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to-drive-or-think-or-talk-or/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/dov-davidoff-1381_driving_lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to_885944.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/dov-davidoff-1381_driving_lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to_885944.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/dov-davidoff-1381_driving_lack-of-sleep-is-only-bad-if-you-have-to_885944.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re-going-to-end-it-do-so-at-a/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41f/dov-davidoff-1381_ends_suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re_2767356.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41f/dov-davidoff-1381_ends_suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re_2767356.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41f/dov-davidoff-1381_ends_suicide-is-a-terrible-idea-but-if-you-re_2767356.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially-if-you-live-together/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64d/dov-davidoff-1381_crime_domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially_1414753.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64d/dov-davidoff-1381_crime_domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially_1414753.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64d/dov-davidoff-1381_crime_domestic-violence-isn-t-funny-especially_1414753.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 6,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-have-to-be-really-comfortable/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e6e/dov-davidoff-1381_comfortable_if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-ha_1445839.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e6e/dov-davidoff-1381_comfortable_if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-ha_1445839.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e6e/dov-davidoff-1381_comfortable_if-i-ever-move-in-with-a-woman-she-ll-ha_1445839.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 7,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Dating a white girl is like dating a black girl if she were really passive-agressive.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-black-girl-if-she-were-really/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/905/dov-davidoff-1381_agressive_dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-bla_2295368.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/905/dov-davidoff-1381_agressive_dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-bla_2295368.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/905/dov-davidoff-1381_agressive_dating-a-white-girl-is-like-dating-a-bla_2295368.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Dating a white girl is like dating a black girl if she were really passive-agressive.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 8,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/water-polo-would-be-much-more-interesting-if-they-hadn-t-gotten-rid/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a41/dov-davidoff-1381_horse_water-polo-would-be-much-more-interestin_1210350.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a41/dov-davidoff-1381_horse_water-polo-would-be-much-more-interestin_1210350.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a41/dov-davidoff-1381_horse_water-polo-would-be-much-more-interestin_1210350.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 9,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was a struggle.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natural-causes-the-cops-would-be/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6cf/dov-davidoff-1381_bedroom_my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natu_2271113.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6cf/dov-davidoff-1381_bedroom_my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natu_2271113.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6cf/dov-davidoff-1381_bedroom_my-bedroom-is-so-messy-if-i-died-of-natu_2271113.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 10,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-at-the-right-time-can-fuel-one/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa5/dov-davidoff-1381_break_break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-a_25718.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa5/dov-davidoff-1381_break_break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-a_25718.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aa5/dov-davidoff-1381_break_break-ups-are-painful-but-if-initiated-a_25718.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 11,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I wonder if anybody ever decided to commit suicide, then thought; but first I'm going to stop by that taco place I like so much.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-commit-suicide-then-thought-but/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/151/dov-davidoff-1381_commit_i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-comm_979979.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/151/dov-davidoff-1381_commit_i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-comm_979979.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/151/dov-davidoff-1381_commit_i-wonder-if-anybody-ever-decided-to-comm_979979.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I wonder if anybody ever decided to commit suicide, then thought; but first I'm going to stop by that taco…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 12,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Upside of being an attractive woman; if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-you-re-remotely-intelligent/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f3f/dov-davidoff-1381_attractive_upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-y_3108461.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f3f/dov-davidoff-1381_attractive_upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-y_3108461.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f3f/dov-davidoff-1381_attractive_upside-of-being-an-attractive-woman-if-y_3108461.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Upside of being an attractive woman; if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 13,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serious-dowry-i-m-talking-goats/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a5/dov-davidoff-1381_chickens_if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serio_2332456.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a5/dov-davidoff-1381_chickens_if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serio_2332456.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1a5/dov-davidoff-1381_chickens_if-i-do-marry-i-ll-expect-a-pretty-serio_2332456.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 14,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-not-saying-i-d-make-it-to-the/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24c/dov-davidoff-1381_chance_if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-n_3015432.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24c/dov-davidoff-1381_chance_if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-n_3015432.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/24c/dov-davidoff-1381_chance_if-no-eye-contact-sex-were-a-sport-i-m-n_3015432.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 15,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-straight-guys-do-if-one-of-the/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/dov-davidoff-1381_gay_gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-strai_1539857.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/dov-davidoff-1381_gay_gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-strai_1539857.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5dc/dov-davidoff-1381_gay_gay-men-greet-each-other-just-like-strai_1539857.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 16,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Just saw a t-shirt at the gym said, body by torture. That's a lot less ironic if you're a political prisoner in the Middle East.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body-by-torture-that-s-a-lot-less/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea7/dov-davidoff-1381_body_just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body_2612982.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea7/dov-davidoff-1381_body_just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body_2612982.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea7/dov-davidoff-1381_body_just-saw-a-t-shirt-at-the-gym-said-body_2612982.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Just saw a t-shirt at the gym said, body by torture. That's a lot less ironic if you're a political prisoner…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 17,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-and-the-guys-goes-sex/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e5/dov-davidoff-1381_addiction_what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-a_2598212.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e5/dov-davidoff-1381_addiction_what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-a_2598212.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e5/dov-davidoff-1381_addiction_what-is-sex-addiction-i-asked-a-doctor-a_2598212.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 18,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like she's got herpes, I can't afford to assume she got stung by a pack of bees.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-if-i-get-a-girl-home-and-she/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0dc/dov-davidoff-1381_assuming_you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-i_838441.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0dc/dov-davidoff-1381_assuming_you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-i_838441.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0dc/dov-davidoff-1381_assuming_you-can-t-assume-the-best-about-people-i_838441.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 19,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If procrastination were a marketable skill, I'd be a real hot commodity.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-skill-i-d-be-a-real-hot-commodity/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35e/dov-davidoff-1381_commodity_if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-ski_1052761.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35e/dov-davidoff-1381_commodity_if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-ski_1052761.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/35e/dov-davidoff-1381_commodity_if-procrastination-were-a-marketable-ski_1052761.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If procrastination were a marketable skill, I'd be a real hot commodity.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 20,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I'd spend more time with you if you were less like you.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were-less-like-you/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f1/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were_1906889.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f1/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were_1906889.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f1/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-spend-more-time-with-you-if-you-were_1906889.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I'd spend more time with you if you were less like you.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 21,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Nothing good about the sun if you're trying to watch television with out curtains.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-trying-to-watch-television-with/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/116/dov-davidoff-1381_curtains_nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-try_2630258.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/116/dov-davidoff-1381_curtains_nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-try_2630258.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/116/dov-davidoff-1381_curtains_nothing-good-about-the-sun-if-you-re-try_2630258.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Nothing good about the sun if you're trying to watch television with out curtains.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 22,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-death/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc8/dov-davidoff-1381_death_if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-de_2208421.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc8/dov-davidoff-1381_death_if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-de_2208421.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc8/dov-davidoff-1381_death_if-you-love-sleep-you-ll-really-enjoy-de_2208421.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 23,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the-people-that-sold-it-looked/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/86f/dov-davidoff-1381_health_health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the_1814593.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/86f/dov-davidoff-1381_health_health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the_1814593.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/86f/dov-davidoff-1381_health_health-food-would-seem-healthier-if-the_1814593.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 24,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Comedy is a cruel mistress, especially if you're already seeing a really cruel mistress.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if-you-re-already-seeing-a/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/612/dov-davidoff-1381_comedy_comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if_1679353.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/612/dov-davidoff-1381_comedy_comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if_1679353.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/612/dov-davidoff-1381_comedy_comedy-is-a-cruel-mistress-especially-if_1679353.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Comedy is a cruel mistress, especially if you're already seeing a really cruel mistress.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 25,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I'd find myself more interesting if I weren't with me all the time.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-weren-t-with-me-all-the-time/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2ed/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-we_2319887.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2ed/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-we_2319887.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2ed/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-find-myself-more-interesting-if-i-we_2319887.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I'd find myself more interesting if I weren't with me all the time.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 26,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I'd like you much better if you didn't like yourself so much.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-like-yourself-so-much/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bea/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-l_1247945.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bea/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-l_1247945.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bea/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_i-d-like-you-much-better-if-you-didn-t-l_1247945.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I'd like you much better if you didn't like yourself so much.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 27,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Quality thoughts will turn their back on you if you don't treat them with respect.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on-you-if-you-don-t-treat-them/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/692/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on_764831.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/692/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on_764831.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/692/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_quality-thoughts-will-turn-their-back-on_764831.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Quality thoughts will turn their back on you if you don't treat them with respect.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 28,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if-i-had-a-girl-i-would-treat/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8dd/dov-davidoff-1381_girl_when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if_1980657.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8dd/dov-davidoff-1381_girl_when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if_1980657.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8dd/dov-davidoff-1381_girl_when-i-was-a-kid-i-remember-thinking-if_1980657.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 29,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-finding-work-as-a-spiritual-guru/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d5f/dov-davidoff-1381_economy_i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-fin_2814643.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d5f/dov-davidoff-1381_economy_i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-fin_2814643.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d5f/dov-davidoff-1381_economy_i-don-t-know-if-it-s-the-economy-but-fin_2814643.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 30,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-response-is-what-the-hell-are/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93d/dov-davidoff-1381_close-friends_if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-res_3187400.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93d/dov-davidoff-1381_close-friends_if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-res_3187400.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93d/dov-davidoff-1381_close-friends_if-you-hug-someone-goodbye-and-their-res_3187400.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 31,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-material-wealth-leads-to-happiness/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/dov-davidoff-1381_adults_if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-mater_1462676.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/dov-davidoff-1381_adults_if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-mater_1462676.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02c/dov-davidoff-1381_adults_if-you-re-an-adult-and-still-think-mater_1462676.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 32,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ever-tried-to-wrestle-a-duvet/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac2/dov-davidoff-1381_awful_being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ev_2758197.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac2/dov-davidoff-1381_awful_being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ev_2758197.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac2/dov-davidoff-1381_awful_being-homeless-is-awful-but-if-you-ve-ev_2758197.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 33,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you spend a lot of time shopping for athletic clothes, you may want to consider spending less time thinking about high school.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for-athletic-clothes-you-may-want/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a2/dov-davidoff-1381_athletic_if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for_2537862.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a2/dov-davidoff-1381_athletic_if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for_2537862.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a2/dov-davidoff-1381_athletic_if-you-spend-a-lot-of-time-shopping-for_2537862.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you spend a lot of time shopping for athletic clothes, you may want to consider spending less time…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 34,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I were a bad black comic I would name my special, Yo mama, and other stories of a lack of self awareness.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name-my-special-yo-mama-and-other/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/582/dov-davidoff-1381_awareness_if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name_1312495.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/582/dov-davidoff-1381_awareness_if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name_1312495.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/582/dov-davidoff-1381_awareness_if-i-were-a-bad-black-comic-i-would-name_1312495.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If I were a bad black comic I would name my special, Yo mama, and other stories of a lack of self awareness.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 35,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I don't know about you, but I like to fall in love on Mondays. This way if things go south right away you still have the weekend.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fall-in-love-on-mondays-this-way/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f0c/dov-davidoff-1381_fall_i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fal_437536.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f0c/dov-davidoff-1381_fall_i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fal_437536.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f0c/dov-davidoff-1381_fall_i-don-t-know-about-you-but-i-like-to-fal_437536.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“I don't know about you, but I like to fall in love on Mondays. This way if things go south right away you…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 36,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person-you-re-dating-and-get-the/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/413/dov-davidoff-1381_dating_is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person_2998921.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/413/dov-davidoff-1381_dating_is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person_2998921.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/413/dov-davidoff-1381_dating_is-it-a-bad-sign-when-you-see-the-person_2998921.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 37,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I were a gynecologist, I'd say things like, Okay, enough of the small talk. Let's check under the hood.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things-like-okay-enough-of-the-small/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3de/dov-davidoff-1381_checks_if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things_2780347.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3de/dov-davidoff-1381_checks_if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things_2780347.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3de/dov-davidoff-1381_checks_if-i-were-a-gynecologist-i-d-say-things_2780347.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If I were a gynecologist, I'd say things like, Okay, enough of the small talk. Let's check under the hood.” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 38,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-his-memory-celebrated-through/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/733/dov-davidoff-1381_cream_if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-h_3187304.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/733/dov-davidoff-1381_cream_if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-h_3187304.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/733/dov-davidoff-1381_cream_if-only-st-valentine-was-around-to-see-h_3187304.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 39,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If you carry a paperback book in your back pocket, but spend more time on your hair than you do reading it, you're probably a bad actor.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-back-pocket-but-spend-more-time/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/dov-davidoff-1381_actor_if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-ba_2590310.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/dov-davidoff-1381_actor_if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-ba_2590310.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7c4/dov-davidoff-1381_actor_if-you-carry-a-paperback-book-in-your-ba_2590310.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“If you carry a paperback book in your back pocket, but spend more time on your hair than you do reading it…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 40,
                    "item": {
                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.",
                        "creator": {
                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Dov Davidoff"
                        },
                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dov-davidoff/stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot-he-had-nothing-to-do-with-it/",
                        "image": {
                            "@type": "ImageObject",
                            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d78/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot_1702637.jpg",
                            "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d78/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot_1702637.jpg",
                            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d78/dov-davidoff-1381_ifs_stop-thanking-god-for-your-parking-spot_1702637.jpg",
                            "width": 1080,
                            "height": 1080,
                            "caption": "“Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do…” — Dov Davidoff",
                            "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                            "creator": {
                                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                            }
                        }
                    }
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "CollectionPage",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/#webpage",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/",
            "name": "Ifs Quotes by Dov Davidoff",
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "mainEntity": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/#itemlist"
            },
            "primaryImageOfPage": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ee2/dov-davidoff-1381_america_america-has-so-much-debt-if-she-were-a-p_2733632.jpg"
            },
            "description": "44 Ifs quotes by Dov Davidoff. Plus more from Dov Davidoff and more Ifs sayings from other authors.",
            "breadcrumb": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/#breadcrumb"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/#breadcrumb",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Topics",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Ifs",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 5,
                    "name": "Dov Davidoff",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/dov-davidoff/"
                }
            ]
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```