--- title: "10 Ifs Quotes By Brad Stine" description: "10 Ifs quotes by Brad Stine. Plus more from Brad Stine and more Ifs sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a0/brad-stine-21104_atheism_if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-com_2253298.jpg" --- > [If God is a crutch, then atheism is a coma.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-coma/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a0/brad-stine-21104_atheism_if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-com_2253298.jpg) > [If the truth conflicts with my beliefs, I change my beliefs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i-change-my-beliefs/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/brad-stine-21104_belief_if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i_803041.jpg) > [If we all die and there is no God, then it's just eternal unconsciousness, you'll never know, but if you're wrong... you'll…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-it-s-just-eternal/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45c/brad-stine-21104_dies_if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-i_2305325.jpg) > [The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. If someone says, You offended me then you say I don't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/the-way-to-stop-political-correctness-is-to-not-do-it-if-someone-says/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2b1/brad-stine-21104_care_the-way-to-stop-political-correctness-is_2161153.jpg) > [Comedy, if it's done well, can reflect the mood of a nation. It can be a mirror to who we are, what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/comedy-if-it-s-done-well-can-reflect-the-mood-of-a-nation-it-can-be-a/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/262/brad-stine-21104_believe_comedy-if-it-s-done-well-can-reflect-the_1850690.jpg) > [There's a difference between maliciously offending somebody - on purpose - and somebody being offended by...truth. If you're offended by the truth,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously-offending-somebody-on/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/brad-stine-21104_bad-intentions_there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously_241052.jpg) > [When you're at a comedy club, if you're not funny, you don't work. People will let you know, whether it's by booing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-not-funny-you-don-t-work/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b53/brad-stine-21104_booing_when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-n_1062298.jpg) > [Oh, I know: If you're fat, let's not blame you, let's sue McDonalds! Oh, for cryin' out loud, hey, if you smoke,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame-you-let-s-sue-mcdonalds-oh/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da5/brad-stine-21104_blame_oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame_1589034.jpg) > [Talk about sexist - have you ever, ever, heard someone come up to a woman and say 'find your masculine side?' And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-heard-someone-come-up-to-a-woman/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/brad-stine-21104_come-up_talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-hea_2107702.jpg) > [You want to reclaim your country? You got to go back to the first men who started this country, the founding fathers…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got-to-go-back-to-the-first-men/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/432/brad-stine-21104_back-to-work_you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got_982034.jpg) ## Other authors on Ifs ## More by Brad Stine > [There's a difference between maliciously offending somebody - on purpose - and somebody being offended by...truth. If you're offended by the truth, that's your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously-offending-somebody-on/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [It's about something that strikes you as funny but I do it with a Christian world view: why we think the way we do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/it-s-about-something-that-strikes-you-as-funny-but-i-do-it-with-a/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [When did banning anything, ever work? I mean, we banned liquor once in this country, oh, that worked like a charm, didn't it, folks?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/when-did-banning-anything-ever-work-i-mean-we-banned-liquor-once-in/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [Because when the Creator of matter, tell you you matter, then you have a purpose and then you have self-esteem.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/because-when-the-creator-of-matter-tell-you-you-matter-then-you-have/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [If the truth conflicts with my beliefs, I change my beliefs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i-change-my-beliefs/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [They got special terms that they use when they're pregnant. They don't even say pregnant, got special words they use - I'm expecting. Expecting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/they-got-special-terms-that-they-use-when-they-re-pregnant-they-don-t/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [Get out of our schools God, get out of our textbooks God, get out of our government God, go away God, go away God,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/get-out-of-our-schools-god-get-out-of-our-textbooks-god-get-out-of/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [You want to reclaim your country? You got to go back to the first men who started this country, the founding fathers and this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got-to-go-back-to-the-first-men/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [When you're at a comedy club, if you're not funny, you don't work. People will let you know, whether it's by booing or yelling…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-not-funny-you-don-t-work/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [I bring up God alot in my show, know why? Because I miss him.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/i-bring-up-god-alot-in-my-show-know-why-because-i-miss-him/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [We should have a way of telling people they have bad breath without hurting their feelings. Well, I'm bored. Let's go brush our teeth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/we-should-have-a-way-of-telling-people-they-have-bad-breath-without/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [Who is more irrational, the guy who believes in a God he can't see, or a guy who's offended by a God he doesn't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/who-is-more-irrational-the-guy-who-believes-in-a-god-he-can-t-see-or/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [People don't realize, or maybe they've forgotten, that there was a time in history when standup comedy wasn't something that you had to hide…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/people-don-t-realize-or-maybe-they-ve-forgotten-that-there-was-a-time/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [You know what offends me? Offended people. In a country with guaranteed rights to freedom of religion, its citizens are constantly trying to make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/you-know-what-offends-me-offended-people-in-a-country-with-guaranteed/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) > [Oh, I know: If you're fat, let's not blame you, let's sue McDonalds! Oh, for cryin' out loud, hey, if you smoke, not your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame-you-let-s-sue-mcdonalds-oh/) [Brad Stine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-stine/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ifs/brad-stine/#itemlist", "name": "10 Ifs Quotes By Brad Stine", "numberOfItems": 10, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If God is a crutch, then atheism is a coma.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-coma/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a0/brad-stine-21104_atheism_if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-com_2253298.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a0/brad-stine-21104_atheism_if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-com_2253298.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6a0/brad-stine-21104_atheism_if-god-is-a-crutch-then-atheism-is-a-com_2253298.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If God is a crutch, then atheism is a coma.” — Brad Stine", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If the truth conflicts with my beliefs, I change my beliefs.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i-change-my-beliefs/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/brad-stine-21104_belief_if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i_803041.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/brad-stine-21104_belief_if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i_803041.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/929/brad-stine-21104_belief_if-the-truth-conflicts-with-my-beliefs-i_803041.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If the truth conflicts with my beliefs, I change my beliefs.” — Brad Stine", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If we all die and there is no God, then it's just eternal unconsciousness, you'll never know, but if you're wrong... you'll know forever.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-it-s-just-eternal/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45c/brad-stine-21104_dies_if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-i_2305325.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45c/brad-stine-21104_dies_if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-i_2305325.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45c/brad-stine-21104_dies_if-we-all-die-and-there-is-no-god-then-i_2305325.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If we all die and there is no God, then it's just eternal unconsciousness, you'll never know, but if you're…” — Brad Stine", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. 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The truth is supposed to offend you; that's how you know you don't got it.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously-offending-somebody-on/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/brad-stine-21104_bad-intentions_there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously_241052.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/brad-stine-21104_bad-intentions_there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously_241052.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/brad-stine-21104_bad-intentions_there-s-a-difference-between-maliciously_241052.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There's a difference between maliciously offending somebody - on purpose - and somebody being offended…” — Brad Stine", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you're at a comedy club, if you're not funny, you don't work. People will let you know, whether it's by booing or yelling for you to get out of the club. People are drunk or whatever and they'll let you have it.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-not-funny-you-don-t-work/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b53/brad-stine-21104_booing_when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-n_1062298.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b53/brad-stine-21104_booing_when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-n_1062298.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b53/brad-stine-21104_booing_when-you-re-at-a-comedy-club-if-you-re-n_1062298.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you're at a comedy club, if you're not funny, you don't work. 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Hey, if you shoot somebody, not your fault, let's blame the gun industry!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame-you-let-s-sue-mcdonalds-oh/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da5/brad-stine-21104_blame_oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame_1589034.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da5/brad-stine-21104_blame_oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame_1589034.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da5/brad-stine-21104_blame_oh-i-know-if-you-re-fat-let-s-not-blame_1589034.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Oh, I know: If you're fat, let's not blame you, let's sue McDonalds! 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And by the way women, if you find your masculine side - I'm not interested.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-heard-someone-come-up-to-a-woman/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/brad-stine-21104_come-up_talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-hea_2107702.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/brad-stine-21104_come-up_talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-hea_2107702.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c85/brad-stine-21104_come-up_talk-about-sexist-have-you-ever-ever-hea_2107702.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Talk about sexist - have you ever, ever, heard someone come up to a woman and say 'find your masculine…” — Brad Stine", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You want to reclaim your country? You got to go back to the first men who started this country, the founding fathers and this is going to be shocking for the liberal professors out there that are indoctrinating our kids but the founding fathers believed in the Judeo-Christian god that believed we have life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness! You can pursuit it. If you don't get it, it's your fault! You messed up. Go back to work. Work harder.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Brad Stine" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-stine/you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got-to-go-back-to-the-first-men/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/432/brad-stine-21104_back-to-work_you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got_982034.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/432/brad-stine-21104_back-to-work_you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got_982034.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/432/brad-stine-21104_back-to-work_you-want-to-reclaim-your-country-you-got_982034.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You want to reclaim your country? 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