--- title: "3 Humorous-quotes Quotes By Julie James" description: "3 Humorous-quotes quotes by Julie James. Plus more from Julie James and more Humorous-quotes sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png" --- > [“Hopefully not another employee stealing credit cards, Brooke mused. Or any sort of headache-inducing “oops moment,” like the time one of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing-credit-cards-brooke-mused-or/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png) > [“Do you recall telling Dr. Phillips during your appointment on February second of last year that you needed to be tested for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during-your-appointment-on-february/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d3b/julie-james-844_humorous-quotes_do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during_1383405.png) > [“So I’m reading some poem by Louise . . . something, I forget her last name, but it’s about Hades and the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-something-i-forget-her-last-name/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f08/julie-james-844_books_so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-somet_1644998.jpg) ## Other authors on Humorous-quotes ## More by Julie James > [“I have to be honest, I’m not exactly impressed with your case,” she said, cutting him off. “All you’ve got is a sporadic string…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/i-have-to-be-honest-i-m-not-exactly-impressed-with-your-case-she-said/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“I think we need a little more rallying around the dumpee. If you were a woman and I’d told you that the third guy…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/i-think-we-need-a-little-more-rallying-around-the-dumpee-if-you-were/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [J.D. cleared his throat and pushed the button on the intercom. “Uh, Payton, hi. It’s J.D.” Dead silence. Then another crackle. “Sorry. Not interested.”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/j-d-cleared-his-throat-and-pushed-the-button-on-the-intercom-uh/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“Sidney gestured to the chair he’d just helped himself to. “What are you doing?” He looked at her as if this was obvious. “Starting…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/sidney-gestured-to-the-chair-he-d-just-helped-himself-to-what-are-you/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [He didn't care whose league Jordan was in. All that mattered was that she was his.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/he-didn-t-care-whose-league-jordan-was-in-all-that-mattered-was-that/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“Why did Jason lie about Naomi?” Jeremy cleared his throat nervously. “Oh. That . Um . . . well, you know, uh . .…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/why-did-jason-lie-about-naomi-jeremy-cleared-his-throat-nervously-oh/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“I have a slight oral fixation.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/i-have-a-slight-oral-fixation/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“(Vaughn said)"I'm serious. There was a speech and everything. She told me that I run around with my 'obviously healthy ego' and compared me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/vaughn-said-i-m-serious-there-was-a-speech-and-everything-she-told-me/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“No use crying over spilled Prosecco.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/no-use-crying-over-spilled-prosecco/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“Davis spun back around, with a nod at Wilkins. “You know, I think Merriam-Webster here is right, Jack—you do have a glowering way about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/davis-spun-back-around-with-a-nod-at-wilkins-you-know-i-think-merriam/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“Taylor’s dating Scott Casey ?” He began to laugh. He held up one hand, clutching his side with the other. “Wait, wait.” He gasped…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/taylor-s-dating-scott-casey-he-began-to-laugh-he-held-up-one-hand/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“BACHELOR NUMBER ONE IS A NO-GO, she texted Trish. HE TALKED TOO MUCH. Within seconds, Trish texted back. ISN’T TALKING A GOOD THING ON…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/bachelor-number-one-is-a-no-go-she-texted-trish-he-talked-too-much/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [Because nine years ago, I walked up to the most beautiful girl in the bar, and tonight she's still the only person I want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/because-nine-years-ago-i-walked-up-to-the-most-beautiful-girl-in-the/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“J.D. scoffed at this. “Please—as if I’m worried about anything Payton has to say. What’s she going to do, give me another one of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/j-d-scoffed-at-this-please-as-if-i-m-worried-about-anything-payton/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) > [“We’ll try to be more sympathetic to your hot nemesis problem. Is she a nightmare to work with?” An image popped into John’s head,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/we-ll-try-to-be-more-sympathetic-to-your-hot-nemesis-problem-is-she-a/) [Julie James](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-james/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/#itemlist", "name": "3 Humorous-quotes Quotes By Julie James", "numberOfItems": 3, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Hopefully not another employee stealing credit cards, Brooke mused. Or any sort of headache-inducing “oops moment,” like the time one of the restaurant managers called to ask if he could fire a line cook after discovering that the man was a convicted murderer. “Jeez. How’d you learn that?” Brooke had asked. “He made a joke to one of the waiters about honing his cooking skills in prison. The waiter asked what he’d been serving time for, and he said, ‘Murder.’” “I bet that put an end to the conversation real fast. And yes, you can fire him,” Brooke had said. “Obviously, he lied on his employment application.” All of Sterling’s employees, regardless of job position, were required to answer whether they’d ever been convicted of a crime involving “violence, deceit, or theft.” Pretty safe to say that murder qualified. Ten minutes later, the manager had called her back. “Um . . . what if he didn’t exactly lie? I just double-checked his application, and as it turns out, he did check the box for having been convicted of a crime.” Brooke had paused at that. “And then the next question, where we ask what crime he’d been convicted for, what did he write?” “Uh . . . ‘second-degree murder.’” “I see. Just a crazy suggestion here, Cory, but you might want to start reading these applications a little more closely before making employment offers.” “Please don’t fire me.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Julie James" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing-credit-cards-brooke-mused-or/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Hopefully not another employee stealing credit cards, Brooke mused. Or any sort of headache-inducing “oops…” — Julie James", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Do you recall telling Dr. Phillips during your appointment on February second of last year that you needed to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases because—let me make sure I get this correct here . . .” Taylor read out loud from her file, “Because, quote, ‘your weasel-dick husband slept with a skanky whore stripper and the cheating bastard didn’t use a rubber’?” Ms. Campbell shot up in her chair. “She actually wrote that down?” The jury tittered with amused laughter and sat up interestedly. Finally—things were starting to look a little more like Law & Order around here. “I take it that’s a yes?” Taylor asked.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Julie James" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during-your-appointment-on-february/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d3b/julie-james-844_humorous-quotes_do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during_1383405.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d3b/julie-james-844_humorous-quotes_do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during_1383405.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d3b/julie-james-844_humorous-quotes_do-you-recall-telling-dr-phillips-during_1383405.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Do you recall telling Dr. Phillips during your appointment on February second of last year that you needed…” — Julie James", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“So I’m reading some poem by Louise . . . something, I forget her last name, but it’s about Hades and the underworld, and I don’t even notice that Paige has come up to my table until she says, ‘Doesn’t everyone want love?’ And I’m thinking, wow, that’s a pretty deep question, but then again Paige is really smart, and this is my chance to finally show her that I’m not just a dumb jock. So I say, ‘I heard this theory once that love means your subconscious is attracted to someone else’s subconscious.’” “Very deep,” Cade said. “Exactly. And I’m feeling proud of myself for that one, until she points to the book and says, ‘Oh, that wasn’t a question. I was just quoting a line from the poem.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Julie James" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-james/so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-something-i-forget-her-last-name/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f08/julie-james-844_books_so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-somet_1644998.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f08/julie-james-844_books_so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-somet_1644998.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f08/julie-james-844_books_so-i-m-reading-some-poem-by-louise-somet_1644998.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“So I’m reading some poem by Louise . . . something, I forget her last name, but it’s about Hades and the…” — Julie James", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/", "name": "Humorous-quotes Quotes by Julie James", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a0d/julie-james-844_credit-card_hopefully-not-another-employee-stealing_163682.png" }, "description": "3 Humorous-quotes quotes by Julie James. Plus more from Julie James and more Humorous-quotes sayings from other authors.", "breadcrumb": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/#breadcrumb" } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/#breadcrumb", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Topics", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Humorous Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "name": "Julie James", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humorous-quotes/julie-james/" } ] }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```