---
title: "57 Humor Quotes By Julia Quinn"
description: "Humor quotes by Julia Quinn feature slapstick scenes, hidden insecurities, and sudden emotional twists."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/julia-quinn-282_humor_con-tu-ber-nal-noun-one-who-occupies-the_1506849.jpg"
---

> [“con-tu-ber-nal(noun). One who occupies the same tent; a tent-fellow, comrade. The thought of Percy Prewitt as my contubernal causes me to break…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/con-tu-ber-nal-noun-one-who-occupies-the-same-tent-a-tent-fellow/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e94/julia-quinn-282_humor_con-tu-ber-nal-noun-one-who-occupies-the_1506849.jpg)

> [“No one should have to walk down a church aisle with a bouquet of flowers unless she was the bride, already had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/no-one-should-have-to-walk-down-a-church-aisle-with-a-bouquet-of/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c6e/julia-quinn-282_funny_no-one-should-have-to-walk-down-a-church_919872.jpg)

> [“He yawned again, this time very loudly, and lazily opened his eyes. "I'm sorry I woke you up," she said quickly. "Was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/he-yawned-again-this-time-very-loudly-and-lazily-opened-his-eyes-i-m/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/59c/julia-quinn-282_humor_he-yawned-again-this-time-very-loudly-an_1182872.jpg)

> [“All I meant to say is that a rake's humor has its basis in cruelty. He needs a victim, for he cannot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/all-i-meant-to-say-is-that-a-rake-s-humor-has-its-basis-in-cruelty-he/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e14/julia-quinn-282_comedy_all-i-meant-to-say-is-that-a-rake-s-humo_587360.jpg)

> [“How delightful! Dunford had just come into an unexpected inheritance. She rather hoped it was something good. One of her friends had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/how-delightful-dunford-had-just-come-into-an-unexpected-inheritance/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b2/julia-quinn-282_cats_how-delightful-dunford-had-just-come-int_2476382.jpg)

> [“He rolled his eyes. Why was he surprised about anything having to do with her? Of course she'd be able to lift…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/he-rolled-his-eyes-why-was-he-surprised-about-anything-having-to-do/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17b/julia-quinn-282_dunford_he-rolled-his-eyes-why-was-he-surprised_1458246.jpg)

> [“They marched back to the kitchen in silence, the only sound being Rufus's growl when Dunford tried to pet him. "Can a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/they-marched-back-to-the-kitchen-in-silence-the-only-sound-being/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/25a/julia-quinn-282_humor_they-marched-back-to-the-kitchen-in-sile_403979.jpg)

> [“A misunderstanding?" Elizabeth echoed. "With an anvil?" "Oh, stop," Harriet admonished her. "I think he looks very dashing." "As if he dashed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/a-misunderstanding-elizabeth-echoed-with-an-anvil-oh-stop-harriet/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d8a/julia-quinn-282_dashing_a-misunderstanding-elizabeth-echoed-with_3143646.jpg)

> [“Miranda was nineteen. Her experience with men consisted of Winston and himself. Both of whom had heretofore been brotherly figures. The poor…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/miranda-was-nineteen-her-experience-with-men-consisted-of-winston-and/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/86d/julia-quinn-282_courtship_miranda-was-nineteen-her-experience-with_1589685.jpg)

> [“The pig reached the assembly of servants, and the maids shrieked, running in every possible direction. Stunned by the sudden movement, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/the-pig-reached-the-assembly-of-servants-and-the-maids-shrieked/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2bd/julia-quinn-282_humor_the-pig-reached-the-assembly-of-servants_3167483.jpg)

> [“You did make a few odd noises when we rounded the corner on the second landing, but no, you were most definitely…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/you-did-make-a-few-odd-noises-when-we-rounded-the-corner-on-the/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/304/julia-quinn-282_humor_you-did-make-a-few-odd-noises-when-we-ro_1197403.jpg)

> [“Not," Caroline had said, "that I disapprove of your moniker. It is simply that my husband's name is also Henry, and it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/not-caroline-had-said-that-i-disapprove-of-your-moniker-it-is-simply/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/180/julia-quinn-282_caroline_not-caroline-had-said-that-i-disapprove_2355233.jpg)

> [“If this morning wasn't enjoyable, at least it was...shall we say...interesting, and my clothing was worth the sacrifice if it means we've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/if-this-morning-wasn-t-enjoyable-at-least-it-was-shall-we-say/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8a0/julia-quinn-282_humor_if-this-morning-wasn-t-enjoyable-at-leas_2036170.jpg)

> [“Do you know what I like about you, Elizabeth?" She couldn't even possibly imagine. "You're as kind and good a person as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/do-you-know-what-i-like-about-you-elizabeth-she-couldn-t-even/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/639/julia-quinn-282_humor_do-you-know-what-i-like-about-you-elizab_1182221.jpg)

> [“Of course. The team on your carriage was beautiful. They are yours, aren't they?" He ignored her and walked ahead until his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/of-course-the-team-on-your-carriage-was-beautiful-they-are-yours-aren/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/828/julia-quinn-282_dunford_of-course-the-team-on-your-carriage-was_1394743.jpg)

> [“She shrugged. "I'm surprised your mother didn't inform you of my presence. Or Belle. She has spoken about you a great deal."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/she-shrugged-i-m-surprised-your-mother-didn-t-inform-you-of-my/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d9d/julia-quinn-282_humor_she-shrugged-i-m-surprised-your-mother-d_3028334.jpg)

> [“All I really need,” he continued, “is for you to act as a deterrent.” “A deterrent?” she choked out. “A human shield,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/all-i-really-need-he-continued-is-for-you-to-act-as-a-deterrent-a/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a7f/julia-quinn-282_courtship_all-i-really-need-he-continued-is-for-yo_1340548.jpg)

> [“You have a minute and a half left." "Fine," she snapped. "Then I'll reduce this conversation to one single fact. Today I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/you-have-a-minute-and-a-half-left-fine-she-snapped-then-i-ll-reduce/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2d3/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_you-have-a-minute-and-a-half-left-fine-s_917192.jpg)

> [“Charlotte Stokehurst,” Violet Bridgerton announced, “is getting married.” “Today?” Hyacinth queried, taking off her gloves. Her mother gave her a look. “She…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/charlotte-stokehurst-violet-bridgerton-announced-is-getting-married/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/89c/julia-quinn-282_gaze_charlotte-stokehurst-violet-bridgerton-a_3214996.jpg)

> [“She was in big trouble now. "You stupid man," she said to the body on the floor. "Why did you have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/she-was-in-big-trouble-now-you-stupid-man-she-said-to-the-body-on-the/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/149/julia-quinn-282_gaze_she-was-in-big-trouble-now-you-stupid-ma_2395737.jpg)

> [“He turned to her. “Didn’t you see the lightning strike the steeple?” She recovered with a sip of tea, then smiled sweetly.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/he-turned-to-her-didn-t-you-see-the-lightning-strike-the-steeple-she/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db5/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_he-turned-to-her-didn-t-you-see-the-ligh_2527891.jpg)

> [“And you, Lord Bridgerton," she replied in a tone that could have frozen champagne, "are almost as handsome as your brother." Colin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/and-you-lord-bridgerton-she-replied-in-a-tone-that-could-have-frozen/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30b/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton-series_and-you-lord-bridgerton-she-replied-in-a_1169936.jpg)

> [“She glowered at him. 'For your information, in the past week, I have been, oh let's see, nearly raped, kidnapped, tied to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/she-glowered-at-him-for-your-information-in-the-past-week-i-have-been/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/154/julia-quinn-282_humor_she-glowered-at-him-for-your-information_1977833.jpg)

> [“Sebastian,” Katarina said, turning to her nephew. “You’ve grown.” “It happens,” Sebastian quipped, flashing her his usual lopsided grin. “Goodness,” she said…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/sebastian-katarina-said-turning-to-her-nephew-you-ve-grown-it-happens/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/211/julia-quinn-282_comedy_sebastian-katarina-said-turning-to-her-n_1902452.jpg)

> [“I understand that you are an accomplished swords-man,” she finally said. He eyed her curiously. Where was she going with this? “I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/i-understand-that-you-are-an-accomplished-swords-man-she-finally-said/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a73/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_i-understand-that-you-are-an-accomplishe_515045.jpg)

> [“I’m not trying to impress you,” he replied, glancing up at the front of the room. “Gads,” he said, blinking in surprise.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/i-m-not-trying-to-impress-you-he-replied-glancing-up-at-the-front-of/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/55e/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_i-m-not-trying-to-impress-you-he-replied_3054018.jpg)

> [“You’ll be seeing him tomorrow night, anyway.” “I am?” Hyacinth asked, at precisely the moment Mr. St. Clair said, “She will?” “You’re…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/you-ll-be-seeing-him-tomorrow-night-anyway-i-am-hyacinth-asked-at/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7b3/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_you-ll-be-seeing-him-tomorrow-night-anyw_2143361.jpg)

> [“First of all, this goes no further than this room." "Agreed," she said quickly. Anthony looked pointedly at Simon. "Of course," he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/first-of-all-this-goes-no-further-than-this-room-agreed-she-said/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ce/julia-quinn-282_brick-wall_first-of-all-this-goes-no-further-than-t_965367.jpg)

> [“You'd never have gotten it right. You have to hit the door just so. It took me weeks to learn." "And what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/you-d-never-have-gotten-it-right-you-have-to-hit-the-door-just-so-it/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3c4/julia-quinn-282_arguing_you-d-never-have-gotten-it-right-you-hav_1515726.jpg)

> [“Miss Bridgerton,” he said, “the devil himself couldn’t scare you.” She forced her eyes to meet his. “That’s not a compliment, is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/miss-bridgerton-he-said-the-devil-himself-couldn-t-scare-you-she/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d6/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_miss-bridgerton-he-said-the-devil-himsel_815428.jpg)

> [“Gareth sucked in a breath. Hyacinth’s brother wasn’t going to make this easy on him. But that didn’t matter. He had vowed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/gareth-sucked-in-a-breath-hyacinth-s-brother-wasn-t-going-to-make/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/84e/julia-quinn-282_bridgerton_gareth-sucked-in-a-breath-hyacinth-s-bro_171105.jpg)

> [“Why do you joke about such things?" she snapped. He let his gaze land rather intently on hers. "When the alternative is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/why-do-you-joke-about-such-things-she-snapped-he-let-his-gaze-land/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b57/julia-quinn-282_comedy_why-do-you-joke-about-such-things-she-sn_2693337.jpg)

> [“Bloody hell," Phillip finally burst out. "If you're going to break my legs, would you just go ahead and do it now?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/bloody-hell-phillip-finally-burst-out-if-you-re-going-to-break-my/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/68e/julia-quinn-282_humor_bloody-hell-phillip-finally-burst-out-if_1435952.jpg)

> [“There was something about Miss Lyndon that made him glad she was on his side. Not that he thought she would make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/there-was-something-about-miss-lyndon-that-made-him-glad-she-was-on/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/484/julia-quinn-282_humor_there-was-something-about-miss-lyndon-th_1444481.jpg)

> [“He ground his teeth and slapped some slop down into a pile. The stench was beyond overwhelming. "I thought you said pigs…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/he-ground-his-teeth-and-slapped-some-slop-down-into-a-pile-the-stench/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ea5/julia-quinn-282_gray-eyes_he-ground-his-teeth-and-slapped-some-slo_2382233.jpg)

> [“Thank you,” she whispered, sending up a quick prayer for his continued recovery. “You’re welcome,” Marcus murmured. Honoria let out a little…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/thank-you-she-whispered-sending-up-a-quick-prayer-for-his-continued/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/645/julia-quinn-282_humor_thank-you-she-whispered-sending-up-a-qui_615809.jpg)

> [“And what renders him so unmarriageable?” Eloise asked. Francesca leveled a serious stare at her older sister. Eloise was mad if she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/and-what-renders-him-so-unmarriageable-eloise-asked-francesca-leveled-2/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c54/julia-quinn-282_humor_and-what-renders-him-so-unmarriageable-e_2450614.jpg)

> [“I wonder where everyone is," she muttered. "Sleeping, if they have any idea what's good for them," Dunford replied acerbically. "I suppose…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/i-wonder-where-everyone-is-she-muttered-sleeping-if-they-have-any/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2d4/julia-quinn-282_first-time_i-wonder-where-everyone-is-she-muttered_792678.jpg)

> [“Have you anything that is ready to wear today? I'd like nothing better than to be rid of that thing she has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/have-you-anything-that-is-ready-to-wear-today-i-d-like-nothing-better/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5ad/julia-quinn-282_fashion_have-you-anything-that-is-ready-to-wear_1485396.jpg)

> [“No," he said hoarsely, "the chair will do just fine, thank you." "If I know you are uncomfortable, I shan't be able…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/no-he-said-hoarsely-the-chair-will-do-just-fine-thank-you-if-i-know/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b75/julia-quinn-282_damsel-in-distress_no-he-said-hoarsely-the-chair-will-do-ju_2012080.jpg)

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## More by Julia Quinn

> [“what a sad pair we are," she said. "Surely we can manage a conversation on a topic other than our respective terrible evenings.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/what-a-sad-pair-we-are-she-said-surely-we-can-manage-a-conversation/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [It was the one dream he'd never permitted himself to consider.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/it-was-the-one-dream-he-d-never-permitted-himself-to-consider/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [But Hyacinth Bridgerton, who at ten should have known the least about kisses of anyone, just blinked thoughtfully, and said, " I think it's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/but-hyacinth-bridgerton-who-at-ten-should-have-known-the-least-about/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [Daphne," he said with controlled gentleness, "what is wrong?" She sat down opposite him and placed a hand on his cheek. "I'm so insensitive,"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/daphne-he-said-with-controlled-gentleness-what-is-wrong-she-sat-down/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [You are always looking at people like this.” And then she made a face, one he couldn’t possibly begin to describe. “If I ever…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/you-are-always-looking-at-people-like-this-and-then-she-made-a-face/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“Charlotte had tried to read his work. It seemed only polite, after all, given that they were neighbors. But after a while, she'd simply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/charlotte-had-tried-to-read-his-work-it-seemed-only-polite-after-all/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“Yes?" "When you said you weren't angry..." "Yes?" "Were you?" "I was rather annoyed," he admitted. "But not angry?" She sounded as if she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/yes-when-you-said-you-weren-t-angry-yes-were-you-i-was-rather-annoyed/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [Daniel held himself very still, waiting for the wave of jealousy that never came. He was furious with the man who’d taken advantage of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/daniel-held-himself-very-still-waiting-for-the-wave-of-jealousy-that/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“ "What do you say, Miss Lyndon? Shall we have a go at it?" " 'Shall we have a go at it?' " Ellie…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/what-do-you-say-miss-lyndon-shall-we-have-a-go-at-it-shall-we-have-a/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“Just curious,she mouthed. "What? I didn't catch that." Jjuussttccuurriioouuss.She drew it out this time, hoping he'd be able to read her lips. "If you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/just-curious-she-mouthed-what-i-didn-t-catch-that/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“It was nearly impossible to keep anything a secret, especially from her sisters, the youngest of whom—Hyacinth—could probably have won the war against Napoleon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/it-was-nearly-impossible-to-keep-anything-a-secret-especially-from/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“Something important is always about to happen... And if not, you'd do well to act as if it were. You'll enjoy life better that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/something-important-is-always-about-to-happen-and-if-not-you-d-do/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“Sophie picked her way through the forest, stepping over tree roots, and pushing aside low-lying branches, letting them snap back behind her with reckless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/sophie-picked-her-way-through-the-forest-stepping-over-tree-roots-and/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [People will think you're courting me.' 'Nonsense, everyone knows I don't court respectable women.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/people-will-think-you-re-courting-me-nonsense-everyone-knows-i-don-t/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

> [“If you cannot recognize the problem, there is no way that I could explain it to you." He laughed, damn the man. "My goodness,"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-quinn/if-you-cannot-recognize-the-problem-there-is-no-way-that-i-could/)

[Julia Quinn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-quinn/)

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                        "text": "“con-tu-ber-nal(noun). One who occupies the same tent; a tent-fellow, comrade. The thought of Percy Prewitt as my contubernal causes me to break out in hives. -From the personal dictionary of Caroline Trent”",
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                        "text": "“He yawned again, this time very loudly, and lazily opened his eyes. \"I'm sorry I woke you up,\" she said quickly. \"Was I sleeping?\" She nodded. \"So there really is a God,\" he muttered.”",
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                        "text": "“All I meant to say is that a rake's humor has its basis in cruelty. He needs a victim, for he cannot imagine ever laughing at himself. You, your grace, are rather clever with the self-deprecating remark.”",
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                        "text": "“How delightful! Dunford had just come into an unexpected inheritance. She rather hoped it was something good. One of her friends had just unwillingly inherited thirty-seven cats.”",
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                        "text": "“He rolled his eyes. Why was he surprised about anything having to do with her? Of course she'd be able to lift a large stone. She was Henry. She could probably lift him.”",
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                        "text": "“They marched back to the kitchen in silence, the only sound being Rufus's growl when Dunford tried to pet him. \"Can a rabbit growl?\" he asked, unable to believe his ears. \"Obviously he can.”",
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                        "text": "“A misunderstanding?\" Elizabeth echoed. \"With an anvil?\" \"Oh, stop,\" Harriet admonished her. \"I think he looks very dashing.\" \"As if he dashed into an anvil.”",
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                        "text": "“Miranda was nineteen. Her experience with men consisted of Winston and himself. Both of whom had heretofore been brotherly figures. The poor girl must be confused as hell. Winston had suddenly decided that she was Venus, Queen Elizabeth, and the Virgin Mary all rolled into one,and Turner had all but forced himself on her. Not exactly an average day in the life of a young country miss”",
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                        "text": "“The pig reached the assembly of servants, and the maids shrieked, running in every possible direction. Stunned by the sudden movement, the pig stopped, raised its snout; and let out a hellish squeal—and then another, and another, and... \"Will you shut up!\" Dunford commanded. The pig, sensing authority, didn't just shut up—it actually laid down.”",
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                        "text": "“You did make a few odd noises when we rounded the corner on the second landing, but no, you were most definitely unconscious.\" \"Odd noises?\" Belle's expression turned sheepish. \"Well, actually it might have had something to do with the fact that you crashed into the end-post when we turned the corner.\" Emma's eyes opened wide.”",
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                        "text": "“Not,\" Caroline had said, \"that I disapprove of your moniker. It is simply that my husband's name is also Henry, and it's rather disconcerting for me to use it on a girl of your tender years.\" Henry had only smiled and told her that that was just fine. It had been so long since she had had a maternal figure that she would have been inclined to let Caroline call her Esmerelda if she so desired.”",
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                        "text": "“If this morning wasn't enjoyable, at least it was...shall we say...interesting, and my clothing was worth the sacrifice if it means we've reached a truce of sorts. I have no wish to be awakened before dawn next week only to be informed I have to single-handedly slaughter a cow.\" Her eyes widened. How did he know?”",
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                        "text": "“Do you know what I like about you, Elizabeth?\" She couldn't even possibly imagine. \"You're as kind and good a person as they come,\" he continued, \"but unlike most kind and good people, you don't preach or cloy, or try to make everyone else kind and good ... And underneath all that kindness and goodness, you seem to possess a wicked sense of humor, no matter how hard you occasionally try to suppress it.”",
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                        "text": "“Of course. The team on your carriage was beautiful. They are yours, aren't they?\" He ignored her and walked ahead until his foot connected with soft mushy ground. \"Shit,\" he muttered. \"Exactly.\" He glared at her, thinking himself a saint for not going for her throat.”",
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                        "text": "“She shrugged. \"I'm surprised your mother didn't inform you of my presence. Or Belle. She has spoken about you a great deal.\" His eyes narrowed as his heart sank. \"You've become friendly with Belle?\" He saw all his hopes for a flirtation with this girl going up in smoke.”",
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                        "text": "“All I really need,” he continued, “is for you to act as a deterrent.” “A deterrent?” she choked out. “A human shield, if you will.” “What?” “I cannot be left alone with that woman,” he said, and he felt no remorse at the low desperation in his voice. “Please, if you have any care for your fellow man.” Her lips clamped together in a suspicious line. “I’m not certain what I get out of the equation.” “You mean besides the joy of my delightful company?” “Yes,” she said, with an impressive lack of inflection, “besides that.”",
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                        "text": "“You have a minute and a half left.\" \"Fine,\" she snapped. \"Then I'll reduce this conversation to one single fact. Today I had six callers. Six! Can you recall the last time I had six callers?\" Anthony just stared at her blankly. \"I can't,\" Daphne continued, in fine form now. \"Because it has never happened. Six men marched up our steps, knocked on our door, and gave Humboldt their cards. Six men brought me flowers, engaged me in conversation, and one even recited poetry.\" Simon winced. \"And do you know why?\" she demanded, her voice rising dangerously. \"Do you?\" Anthony, in his somewhat belatedly arrived wisdom, held his tongue. \"It is all because he\"—she jabbed her forefinger toward Simon—\"was kind enough to feign interest in me last night at Lady Danbury's ball.”",
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                        "text": "“Charlotte Stokehurst,” Violet Bridgerton announced, “is getting married.” “Today?” Hyacinth queried, taking off her gloves. Her mother gave her a look. “She has become engaged. Her mother told me this morning.” Hyacinth looked around. “Were you waiting for me in the hall?” “To the Earl of Renton,” Violet added. “Renton.” “Have we any tea?” Hyacinth asked. “I walked all the way home, and I’m thirsty.” “Renton!” Violet exclaimed, looking about ready to throw up her hands in despair. “Did you hear me?” “Renton,” Hyacinth said obligingly. “He has fat ankles.” “He’s—” Violet stopped short. “Why were you looking at his ankles?”",
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                        "text": "“She was in big trouble now. \"You stupid man,\" she said to the body on the floor. \"Why did you have to lunge at me like that? Why couldn't you have left well enough alone? I told your father I wasn't going to marry you. I told him I wouldn't marry you if you were the last idiot in Britain.\" She nearly stamped her foot in frustration. Why was it her words never came out quite the way she intended them to? \"What I meant to say was that you are an idiot,\" she said to Percy, who, not surprisingly, didn't respond, \"and that I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man in Britain, and- Oh, blast. What am I doing talking to you, anyway? You're quite dead.”",
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                        "text": "“He turned to her. “Didn’t you see the lightning strike the steeple?” She recovered with a sip of tea, then smiled sweetly. “I was listening too devotedly to the sermon.” “Claptrap last week,” Lady D announced. “I think the priest is getting old.” Gareth opened his mouth, but before he could say a word, his grandmother’s cane swung around in a remarkably steady horizontal arc. “Don’t,” she warned, “make a comment beginning with the words, ‘Coming from you…’” “I wouldn’t dream of it,” he demurred. “Of course you would,” she stated. “You wouldn’t be my grandson if you wouldn’t.” She turned to Hyacinth. “Don’t you agree?” To her credit, Hyacinth folded her hands in her lap and said, “Surely there is no right answer to that question.” “Smart girl,” Lady D said approvingly. “I learn from the master.” Lady Danbury beamed.”",
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                        "text": "“And you, Lord Bridgerton,\" she replied in a tone that could have frozen champagne, \"are almost as handsome as your brother.\" Colin snorted again, only this time it sounded as if he were being strangled. \"Are you all right?\" Miss Sheffield asked. \"He's fine,\" Anthony barked. She ignored him, keeping her attention on Colin. \"Are you certain?\" Colin nodded furiously. 'Tickle in my throat.\" \"Or perhaps a guilty conscience?\" Anthony suggested. Colin turned deliberately from his brother to Kate. \"I think I might need another glass of lemonade,\" he gasped. \"Or maybe,\" said Anthony, \"something stronger. Hemlock, perhaps?”",
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                        "text": "“She glowered at him. 'For your information, in the past week, I have been, oh let's see, nearly raped, kidnapped, tied to a bedpost, forced to cough my voice into nothingness-\" \"That was your own fault.\" \"Not to mention the fact that I embarked upon a life of crime by breaking and entering into my former home, was nearly trapped by my odious guardian-\" \"Don't forget your sprained ankle,\" he supplied. \"Ooooohhhh! I could kill you!\" Another bar of soap flew by his head, grazing his ear. \"Madam, you are certainly doing an able job of trying.\" \"And now!\" she fairly yelled. \"And now, as if all of that weren't undignified enough, I am forced to live for a week in a bloody bathroom!”",
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                        "text": "“Sebastian,” Katarina said, turning to her nephew. “You’ve grown.” “It happens,” Sebastian quipped, flashing her his usual lopsided grin. “Goodness,” she said with smile, “you’ll be a danger to the ladies soon.” Harry very nearly rolled his eyes. Sebastian had already made conquests of nearly all the girls in the village near Hesslewhite. He must give off some sort of scent, because the females positively fell at his feet. It would have been appalling, except that the girls couldn’t all dance with Sebastian. And Harry was more than happy to be the nearest man standing when the smoke cleared.”",
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                        "text": "“I understand that you are an accomplished swords-man,” she finally said. He eyed her curiously. Where was she going with this? “I like to fence, yes,” he replied. “I have always wanted to learn.” “Good God,” Gregory grunted. “I would be quite good at it,” she protested. “I’m sure you would,” her brother replied, “which is why you should never be allowed within thirty feet of a sword.” He turned to Gareth. “She’s quite diabolical.” “Yes, I’d noticed,” Gareth murmured, deciding that maybe there might be a bit more to Hyacinth’s brother than he had thought. Gregory shrugged, reaching for a piece of shortbread. “It’s probably why we can’t seem to get her married off.” “Gregory!” This came from Hyacinth, but that was only because Lady Bridgerton had excused herself and followed one of the footmen into the hall. “It’s a compliment!” Gregory protested. “Haven’t you waited your entire life for me to agree that you’re smarter than any of the poor fools who have attempted to court you?” “You might find it difficult to believe,” Hyacinth shot back, “but I haven’t been going to bed each night thinking to myself—Oh, I do wish my brother would offer me something that passes for a compliment in his twisted mind.”",
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                        "text": "“I’m not trying to impress you,” he replied, glancing up at the front of the room. “Gads,” he said, blinking in surprise. “What is that ?” Hyacinth followed his gaze. Several of the Pleinsworth progeny, one of whom appeared to be costumed as a shepherdess, were milling about. “Now that’s an interesting coincidence,” Gareth murmured. “It might be time to start bleating,” she agreed. “I thought this was meant to be a poetry recitation.” Hyacinth grimaced and shook her head. “An unexpected change to the program, I’m afraid.” “From iambic pentameter to Little Bo Peep?” he asked doubtfully. “It does seem a stretch.” Hyacinth gave him a rueful look. “I think there will still be iambic pentameter.” His mouth fell open. “From Peep?” She nodded, holding up the program that had been resting in her lap. “It’s an original composition,” she said, as if that would explain everything. “By Harriet Pleinsworth.The Shepherdess, the Unicorn, and Henry VIII .” “All of them? At once?” “I’m not jesting,” she said, shaking her head. “Of course not. Even you couldn’t have made this up.” Hyacinth decided to take that as a compliment. “Why didn’t I receive one of these?” he asked, taking the program from her. “I believe it was decided not to hand them out to the gentlemen,” Hyacinth said, glancing about the room. “One has to admire Lady Pleinsworth’s foresight, actually. You’d surely flee if you knew what was in store for you.”",
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                        "text": "“You’ll be seeing him tomorrow night, anyway.” “I am?” Hyacinth asked, at precisely the moment Mr. St. Clair said, “She will?” “You’re accompanying me to the Pleinsworth poetry reading,” Lady D told her grandson. “Or have you forgotten?” Hyacinth sat back, enjoying the sight of Gareth St. Clair’s mouth opening and closing in obvious distress. He looked a bit like a fish, she decided. A fish with the features of a Greek god, but still, a fish. “I really…” he said. “That is to say, I can’t—” “You can, and you will be there,” Lady D said. “You promised.” He regarded her with a stern expression. “I cannot imagine—” “Well, if you didn’t promise, you should have done, and if you love me…” Hyacinth coughed to cover her laugh, then tried not to smirk when Mr. St. Clair shot a dirty look in her direction. “When I die,” he said, “surely my epitaph will read, ‘He loved his grandmother when no one else would.’” “And what’s wrong with that?” Lady Danbury asked.”",
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                        "text": "“First of all, this goes no further than this room.\" \"Agreed,\" she said quickly. Anthony looked pointedly at Simon. \"Of course,\" he replied. \"Mother would be devastated if she learned the truth.\" \"Actually,\" Simon murmured, \"I rather think your mother would applaud our ingenuity, but since you have quite obviously known her longer, I bow to your discretion.\" Anthony shot him a frosty look. \"Second, under no circumstances are the two of you to be alone together. Ever.\" \"Well, that should be easy,\" Daphne said, \"as we wouldn't be allowed to be alone if we were courting in truth, anyway.\" Simon recalled their brief interlude in the hall at Lady Danbury's house, and found it a pity that he wasn't to be allowed any more private time with Daphne, but he recognized a brick wall when he saw one, especially when said wall happened to be named Anthony Bridgerton. So he just nodded and murmured his assent. \"Third—\" \"There is a third?\" Daphne asked. \"There would be thirty if I could think of them,\" Anthony growled. \"Very well,\" she acceded, looking most aggrieved. \"If you must.”",
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                        "text": "“You'd never have gotten it right. You have to hit the door just so. It took me weeks to learn.\" \"And what were you doing sneaking out at night?\" he demanded. \"I fail to see how that is your business.\" \"You became my business when you took up residence in my house.\" \"Well, I wouldn't have moved in if you hadn'tkidnapped me!\" \"I wouldn't have kidnapped you if you hadn't been wandering about the countryside with no thought to your own safety.\" \"I was certainly safer in the countryside than I was at Prewitt Hall, and you well know it.\" \"You wouldn't be safe in a convent,\" he muttered. \"If you two lovebirds can stop snapping at each other,\" James cut in, \"I'd like to search the study before Prewitt returns home.\" Blake glared at Caroline as if this entire delay were her fault, causing her to hiss, \"Don't forget that if it weren't for me-\" \"If it weren't for you,\" he shot back, \"I would be a very happy man indeed.\" \"We are wasting time,\" James reminded them. \"The both of you may remain here, if you cannot cease your squabbling, but I am going in to search the south drawing room.\" \"I'll go first,\" Caroline announced, \"since I know the way.\" \"You'll go behind me,\" Blake contradicted, \"and give me directions as we go along.\" \"Oh, for the love of Saint Peter,\" James finally burst out, exasperation showing in every line of his body. \"I'll go first, if only to shut the two of you up. Caroline, you follow and give me directions. Blake, you guard her from the rear.”",
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                        "text": "“Miss Bridgerton,” he said, “the devil himself couldn’t scare you.” She forced her eyes to meet his. “That’s not a compliment, is it?” He lifted her hand to his lips, brushing a feather-light kiss across her knuckles. “You’ll have to figure that out for yourself,” he murmured. To all who observed, he was the soul of propriety, but Hyacinth caught the daring gleam in his eye, and she felt the breath leave her body as tingles of electricity rushed across her skin. Her lips parted, but she had nothing to say, not a single word. There was nothing but air, and even that seemed in short supply. And then he straightened as if nothing had happened and said, “Do let me know what you decide.” She just stared at him. “About the compliment,” he added. “I am sure you will wish to let me know how I feel about you.” Her mouth fell open. He smiled. Broadly. “Speechless, even. I’m to be commended.” “You—” “No. No,” he said, lifting one hand in the air and pointing toward her as if what he really wanted to do was place his finger on her lips and shush her. “Don’t ruin it. The moment is too rare.”",
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                        "text": "“Gareth sucked in a breath. Hyacinth’s brother wasn’t going to make this easy on him. But that didn’t matter. He had vowed to do this right, and he would not be cowed. He looked up, meeting the viscount’s dark eyes with steady purpose. “I would like to marry Hyacinth,” he said. And then, because the viscount did not say anything, because he didn’t even move, Gareth added, “Er, if she’ll have me.” And then about eight things happened at once. Or perhaps there were merely two or three, and it just seemed like eight, because it was all so unexpected. First, the viscount exhaled, although that did seem to understate the case. It was more of a sigh, actually—a huge, tired, heartfelt sigh that made the man positively deflate in front of Gareth. Which was astonishing. Gareth had seen the viscount on many occasions and was quite familiar with his reputation. This was not a man who sagged or groaned. His lips seemed to move through the whole thing, too, and if Gareth were a more suspicious man, he would have thought that the viscount had said, “Thank you, Lord.” Combined with the heavenward tilt of the viscount’s eyes, it did seem the most likely translation. And then, just as Gareth was taking all of this in, Lord Bridgerton let the palms of his hands fall against the desk with surprising force, and he looked Gareth squarely in the eye as he said, “Oh, she’ll have you. She will definitely have you.” It wasn’t quite what Gareth had expected. “I beg your pardon,” he said, since truly, he could think of nothing else. “I need a drink,” the viscount said, rising to his feet. “A celebration is in order, don’t you think?” “Er…yes?” Lord Bridgerton crossed the room to a recessed bookcase and plucked a cut-glass decanter off one of the shelves. “No,” he said to himself, putting it haphazardly back into place, “the good stuff, I think.” He turned to Gareth, his eyes taking on a strange, almost giddy light. “The good stuff, wouldn’t you agree?” “Ehhhh…” Gareth wasn’t quite sure what to make of this. “The good stuff,” the viscount said firmly. He moved some books to the side and reached behind to pull out what looked to be a very old bottle of cognac. “Have to keep it hidden,” he explained, pouring it liberally into two glasses. “Servants?” Gareth asked. “Brothers.” He handed Gareth a glass. “Welcome to the family.”",
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                        "text": "“Why do you joke about such things?\" she snapped. He let his gaze land rather intently on hers. \"When the alternative is despair, I generally prefer humor. Even if it is of the gallows variety.”",
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                        "text": "“Bloody hell,\" Phillip finally burst out. \"If you're going to break my legs, would you just go ahead and do it now?”",
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                        "text": "“There was something about Miss Lyndon that made him glad she was on his side. Not that he thought she would make a vicious enemy, just that she seemed loyal, level-headed, and fair. And she had a wicked sense of humor. Just the sort of person a man would want standing beside him when he needed support.”",
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                        "text": "“He ground his teeth and slapped some slop down into a pile. The stench was beyond overwhelming. \"I thought you said pigs are clean.\" \"Cleaner than people usually think, but not as clean as you and I.\" She looked at his messy boots, amusement dancing in her gray eyes. \"Well, usually.”",
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                        "text": "“Thank you,” she whispered, sending up a quick prayer for his continued recovery. “You’re welcome,” Marcus murmured. Honoria let out a little shriek of surprise, jumping back nearly a foot. “Sorry,” he said, but he was laughing. It was quite the loveliest sound Honoria had ever heard. “I wasn’t thanking you,” she said pertly. “I know.” He smiled”",
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                        "text": "“And what renders him so unmarriageable?” Eloise asked. Francesca leveled a serious stare at her older sister. Eloise was mad if she thought she should set her cap for Michael. “Well?” Eloise prodded. “He could never remain faithful to one woman,” Francesca said, “and I doubt you’d be willing to put up with infidelities.” “No,” Eloise murmured, “not unless he’d be willing to put up with severe bodily injury.”",
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                        "text": "“I wonder where everyone is,\" she muttered. \"Sleeping, if they have any idea what's good for them,\" Dunford replied acerbically. \"I suppose we could get started on our own,\" she said doubtfully. For the first time all morning he smiled broadly and meant it. \"I know less than nothing about stonemasonry, so I vote we wait.”",
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                        "text": "“Have you anything that is ready to wear today? I'd like nothing better than to be rid of that thing she has on now. You can use her measurements to fashion a few more.\" \"I have one or two I could quickly alter to her size. In fact there is one right there.\" She pointed to a pale yellow day dress draped over a dressmaker's model. Dunford was just about to say that it would do when he saw Henry's face. She was staring at the dress like a starving woman.”",
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                        "text": "“No,\" he said hoarsely, \"the chair will do just fine, thank you.\" \"If I know you are uncomfortable, I shan't be able to sleep.\" She sounded remarkably like a damsel in distress. Dunford shuddered. He had never been able to resist playing hero. Slowly he got to his feet and walked to the empty side of the bed. How bad could it be?”",
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