--- title: "25 Humor Quotes By Gena Showalter" description: "25 Humor quotes by Gena Showalter. Plus more from Gena Showalter and more Humor sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png" --- > [“My fur is silky, damn it.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/my-fur-is-silky-damn-it/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png) > [“You're making me rethink my stance against cold-blooded homicide.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-against-cold-blooded-homicide/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d79/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-again_2202283.png) > [“Noth that I think you're wrong to be disgusted by anyone in bed with chicken man.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-disgusted-by-anyone-in-bed-with/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b9/gena-showalter-541_disgusted_noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-dis_2390610.png) > [“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I might be a vampire so I don't give a shit. I'll heal”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but-i-might-be-a-vampire-so-i/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a9/gena-showalter-541_healing_sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but_216733.jpg) > [“You're making me rethink my stance on cold-blooded homicide.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-cold-blooded-homicide/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/203/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-co_2408245.png) > [“His name is Tyson? I hate to break it to you, but you dated a brand of chicken.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to-you-but-you-dated-a-brand-of/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f58/gena-showalter-541_chicken_his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to_1598591.png) > [“I'm trusting you not to break my heart. If it gets even a scratch, I'll break your face. -Shaye”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-if-it-gets-even-a-scratch-i-ll/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/gena-showalter-541_break-heart_i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-i_250566.png) > [“Me: I think we should have sex again. Royce: Bad idea. Me: Why? Royce: I want more from you than sex. Me:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royce-bad-idea-me-why-royce-i/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/40b/gena-showalter-541_bad-idea_me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royc_114739.png) > [“Number eight of the ten Amazon commandments: never fight an opponent face-to-face if you couldn’t defeat him. Wait and stab him in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandments-never-fight-an-opponent/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44c/gena-showalter-541_commandments_number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandme_2243869.png) > [“You’re just begging for a piece of me, you know that?” she growled. “I don’t know what gave you the idea I've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-you-know-that-she-growled-i-don/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02a/gena-showalter-541_begging_you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-yo_2527368.jpg) > [“I plan to let Lysander rip the garment off me, make love to me in the dirtiest way possible, and then, while…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-off-me-make-love-to-me-in-the/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63e/gena-showalter-541_humor_i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-o_3134848.png) > [“THREE DAYS AND twelve psychics later, Katie and Jorlan had developed a routine. Morning: jog, visit psychics. Afternoon: work at the Victorian.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-katie-and-jorlan-had-developed-a/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/878/gena-showalter-541_habits_three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-kat_2367776.png) > [“The lamp tipped over, nailing Kane in the head. Sabin shook his head. The man was a walking disaster Literally. Whenever Kane…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the-head-sabin-shook-his-head/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9aa/gena-showalter-541_disaster_the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the_2416241.jpg) > [“He'd asked me to marry him. He'd kissed me. Twice. He said he loved me. What a scum, rat, dog bastard. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-me-twice-he-said-he-loved-me/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9a/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-m_1182806.png) > [“I am an alien huntress. I am part of the A.I.R. team, working with or against the New Chicago PD—whichever suits me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the-a-i-r-team-working-with-or/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/031/gena-showalter-541_alien_i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the_1171928.png) > [“He had a bleeding cut on his leg and he smelled like shit. Her nose wrinkled. "Step in something?" she asked innocently.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he-smelled-like-shit-her-nose/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/570/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he_2881563.jpg) > [“Forceful little thing, aren’t you?” “You have no idea. So we doing this or not?” Those lush lips twitched. “Let me get…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-have-no-idea-so-we-doing-this-or/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1b/gena-showalter-541_banter_forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-hav_1044648.jpg) > [“Twenty-seven.” His brow puckered, and he blinked over at her. “Twenty-seven hundred years, right?” If he were speaking to Taliyah, yes. “No.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-blinked-over-at-her-twenty/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eab/gena-showalter-541_age_twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-bl_281062.jpg) > [“That's a poweful ability you've got there. Seriously, I was Contemplating killing Cody so we could be a couple.' She snorted, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-there-seriously-i-was/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d6/gena-showalter-541_belle_that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-ther_2821401.jpg) > [“Lucien: And Flowers--but only Anya can call me that. William: Fine. I'll call you Roses. Lucien: You won't. William: I will. Zodiac…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-call-me-that-william-fine-i-ll/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/gena-showalter-541_flowers_lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-cal_778670.png) > [“He’s a love-’em-and-leave-’em kind of guy. And though he’s not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his head. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy-and-though-he-s-not-a-lord-he/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy_115364.png) > [“Suddenly William loomed over him, scowling, snarling and bloody, his suit dirt-stained and ripped. “Do you know. How many strands. Of hair…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowling-snarling-and-bloody-his/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27a/gena-showalter-541_fiction_suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowlin_1729902.jpg) > [“William slapped him on the shoulder, sending Sex into rapturous convulsions. “Before we do this, I’ve got one question for you. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-sending-sex-into-rapturous/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45f/gena-showalter-541_fiction_william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-send_2586214.jpg) > [“I have never battled a gargoyle before.” Zacharel shook his head, a dark lock of hair tumbling into one emerald eye. Damp…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-zacharel-shook-his-head-a-dark/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/00c/gena-showalter-541_demon_i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-z_2178786.png) > [“There was a dragon who had a long-standing obsession with a queen's breasts," she said, growing breathless. "The dragon knew the penalty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standing-obsession-with-a-queen-s/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c0e/gena-showalter-541_humor_there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standi_2284882.jpg) ## Other authors on Humor - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b018/author-mitch-hedberg-68629.jpg) Mitch Hedberg 251 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/mitch-hedberg/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b010/author-george-w-bush-38036.jpg) George W. Bush 220 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/george-w-bush/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b022/author-steven-wright-87563.jpg) Steven Wright 203 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/steven-wright/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b023/author-terry-pratchett-89528.jpg) Terry Pratchett 181 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/terry-pratchett/) - [Mokokoma Mokhonoana 161 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) - [Art Hochberg 156 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/art-hochberg/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b020/author-rick-riordan-79077.jpg) Rick Riordan 123 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/rick-riordan/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b013/author-jerry-coleman-49066.jpg) Jerry Coleman 116 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/jerry-coleman/) - [Mark Twain 112 quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/mark-twain/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b010/author-george-carlin-37578.jpg) George Carlin 102 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/george-carlin/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b006/author-cassandra-clare-21529.jpg) Cassandra Clare 100 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/cassandra-clare/) - [ ![](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/uploads/sms4s/authors/processed/b021/author-rodney-dangerfield-80610.jpg) Rodney Dangerfield 96 quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/rodney-dangerfield/) ## More by Gena Showalter > [“Justin took off in a run. Frosty and Bronx, too. It wasn’t long before Frosty was carrying Kat, Bronx was carrying Reeve and Justin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/justin-took-off-in-a-run-frosty-and-bronx-too-it-wasn-t-long-before/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [You are such a chick.” I widened my eyes in mock surprise. “No way. Are you sure?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-are-such-a-chick-i-widened-my-eyes-in-mock-surprise-no-way-are/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [Girl, he wants to dip you in Frosted Flakes and have you for breakfast. That's his favorite cereal, by the way." I...had no words…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/girl-he-wants-to-dip-you-in-frosted-flakes-and-have-you-for-breakfast/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [I'm not sure why we want each other," she grumbled. "Nor am I, but the fact remains that we do want each other." "Maybe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-m-not-sure-why-we-want-each-other-she-grumbled-nor-am-i-but-the/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“Are you gonna kill me?" the kid asked. Kid definitely didn't know who he was. There would be fawning. Wait. He looked that scary?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/are-you-gonna-kill-me-the-kid-asked-kid-definitely-didn-t-know-who-he/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [She stood, squared her shoulders. “We’ll do it. Together.” And then she did something that shocked them both. She rose on her tiptoes and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/she-stood-squared-her-shoulders-we-ll-do-it-together-and-then-she-did/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [To you I belong.My heart beats only for you.No other will tempt me,from this day and beyond.To you I belong.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/to-you-i-belong-my-heart-beats-only-for-you-no-other-will-tempt-me/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [I’m not trying to—What do teenagers say nowadays?” he asked my grandmother.“Get all up in her biznez,” Nana said.Without cracking a smile.“That’s right,” he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-m-not-trying-to-what-do-teenagers-say-nowadays-he-asked-my/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“For a moment, Strider almost forgot how pissed he was with Amun and Haidee as he savored the fact that he'd just cock-blocked the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/for-a-moment-strider-almost-forgot-how-pissed-he-was-with-amun-and/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [If all we've got to look forward to is disloyalty and treachery, why do we even make friends?" "Again, human nature. Hoping for the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/if-all-we-ve-got-to-look-forward-to-is-disloyalty-and-treachery-why/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“He grunted, then he howled. I guess vinaigrette burns. Ha! I controlled the urge to grin. I leaped atop the dark, glossy table surface—and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-grunted-then-he-howled-i-guess-vinaigrette-burns-ha-i-controlled/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [That means life itself is a fairy tale. Like the characters, we all live and love and search for a happily-ever-after.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/that-means-life-itself-is-a-fairy-tale-like-the-characters-we-all/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“That’s my cousin, dickwad,” Agent Jaxon Tremain said from Hector’s left. Had Whacky Jacky been next to Dallas, he would have drilled his knuckles…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/that-s-my-cousin-dickwad-agent-jaxon-tremain-said-from-hector-s-left/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“You are treating that thing as if it is a great treasure," he said. Well, yeah. Because it was. "You have something against cookies?"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-are-treating-that-thing-as-if-it-is-a-great-treasure-he-said-well/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) > [“Me: I think we should have sex again. Royce: Bad idea. Me: Why? Royce: I want more from you than sex. Me: Goodbye, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royce-bad-idea-me-why-royce-i/) [Gena Showalter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gena-showalter/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/#itemlist", "name": "25 Humor Quotes By Gena Showalter", "numberOfItems": 25, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“My fur is silky, damn it.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/my-fur-is-silky-damn-it/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“My fur is silky, damn it.” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You're making me rethink my stance against cold-blooded homicide.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-against-cold-blooded-homicide/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d79/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-again_2202283.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d79/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-again_2202283.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d79/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-again_2202283.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You're making me rethink my stance against cold-blooded homicide.” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Noth that I think you're wrong to be disgusted by anyone in bed with chicken man.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-disgusted-by-anyone-in-bed-with/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b9/gena-showalter-541_disgusted_noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-dis_2390610.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b9/gena-showalter-541_disgusted_noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-dis_2390610.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b9/gena-showalter-541_disgusted_noth-that-i-think-you-re-wrong-to-be-dis_2390610.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Noth that I think you're wrong to be disgusted by anyone in bed with chicken man.” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I might be a vampire so I don't give a shit. I'll heal”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but-i-might-be-a-vampire-so-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a9/gena-showalter-541_healing_sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but_216733.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a9/gena-showalter-541_healing_sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but_216733.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a9/gena-showalter-541_healing_sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but_216733.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I might be a vampire so I don't give a shit. I'll heal” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You're making me rethink my stance on cold-blooded homicide.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-cold-blooded-homicide/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/203/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-co_2408245.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/203/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-co_2408245.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/203/gena-showalter-541_cold-blooded_you-re-making-me-rethink-my-stance-on-co_2408245.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You're making me rethink my stance on cold-blooded homicide.” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 6, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“His name is Tyson? I hate to break it to you, but you dated a brand of chicken.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to-you-but-you-dated-a-brand-of/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f58/gena-showalter-541_chicken_his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to_1598591.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f58/gena-showalter-541_chicken_his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to_1598591.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f58/gena-showalter-541_chicken_his-name-is-tyson-i-hate-to-break-it-to_1598591.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“His name is Tyson? I hate to break it to you, but you dated a brand of chicken.” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I'm trusting you not to break my heart. If it gets even a scratch, I'll break your face. -Shaye”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-if-it-gets-even-a-scratch-i-ll/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/gena-showalter-541_break-heart_i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-i_250566.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/gena-showalter-541_break-heart_i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-i_250566.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5af/gena-showalter-541_break-heart_i-m-trusting-you-not-to-break-my-heart-i_250566.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm trusting you not to break my heart. If it gets even a scratch, I'll break your face. -Shaye” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Me: I think we should have sex again. Royce: Bad idea. Me: Why? Royce: I want more from you than sex. Me: Goodbye, you prudish bastard.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royce-bad-idea-me-why-royce-i/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/40b/gena-showalter-541_bad-idea_me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royc_114739.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/40b/gena-showalter-541_bad-idea_me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royc_114739.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/40b/gena-showalter-541_bad-idea_me-i-think-we-should-have-sex-again-royc_114739.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Me: I think we should have sex again. Royce: Bad idea. Me: Why? Royce: I want more from you than sex. Me…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Number eight of the ten Amazon commandments: never fight an opponent face-to-face if you couldn’t defeat him. Wait and stab him in the back later.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandments-never-fight-an-opponent/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44c/gena-showalter-541_commandments_number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandme_2243869.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44c/gena-showalter-541_commandments_number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandme_2243869.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/44c/gena-showalter-541_commandments_number-eight-of-the-ten-amazon-commandme_2243869.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Number eight of the ten Amazon commandments: never fight an opponent face-to-face if you couldn’t defeat…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You’re just begging for a piece of me, you know that?” she growled. “I don’t know what gave you the idea I've lowered my standards, but I assure you, I haven’t. I want no part of you.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-you-know-that-she-growled-i-don/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02a/gena-showalter-541_begging_you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-yo_2527368.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02a/gena-showalter-541_begging_you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-yo_2527368.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/02a/gena-showalter-541_begging_you-re-just-begging-for-a-piece-of-me-yo_2527368.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You’re just begging for a piece of me, you know that?” she growled. “I don’t know what gave you the idea…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I plan to let Lysander rip the garment off me, make love to me in the dirtiest way possible, and then, while he’s trying to catch his breath, drop the big, bad bombshell on him and run like hell. Bianka to Kaia”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-off-me-make-love-to-me-in-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63e/gena-showalter-541_humor_i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-o_3134848.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63e/gena-showalter-541_humor_i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-o_3134848.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63e/gena-showalter-541_humor_i-plan-to-let-lysander-rip-the-garment-o_3134848.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I plan to let Lysander rip the garment off me, make love to me in the dirtiest way possible, and then, while…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“THREE DAYS AND twelve psychics later, Katie and Jorlan had developed a routine. Morning: jog, visit psychics. Afternoon: work at the Victorian. Evening: talk, watch television. Twilight: sleep apart and fantasize.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-katie-and-jorlan-had-developed-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/878/gena-showalter-541_habits_three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-kat_2367776.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/878/gena-showalter-541_habits_three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-kat_2367776.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/878/gena-showalter-541_habits_three-days-and-twelve-psychics-later-kat_2367776.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“THREE DAYS AND twelve psychics later, Katie and Jorlan had developed a routine. Morning: jog, visit…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“The lamp tipped over, nailing Kane in the head. Sabin shook his head. The man was a walking disaster Literally. Whenever Kane stepped into a room, things went to hell pretty quickly. Sabin expected the ceiling to cave in any moment. And yea, it had happened before.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the-head-sabin-shook-his-head/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9aa/gena-showalter-541_disaster_the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the_2416241.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9aa/gena-showalter-541_disaster_the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the_2416241.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9aa/gena-showalter-541_disaster_the-lamp-tipped-over-nailing-kane-in-the_2416241.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The lamp tipped over, nailing Kane in the head. Sabin shook his head. The man was a walking disaster…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“He'd asked me to marry him. He'd kissed me. Twice. He said he loved me. What a scum, rat, dog bastard. I wouldn't sleep with him now if I was dying and the only thing that could save me was a penis injection from him.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-me-twice-he-said-he-loved-me/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9a/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-m_1182806.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9a/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-m_1182806.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9a/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-d-asked-me-to-marry-him-he-d-kissed-m_1182806.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“He'd asked me to marry him. He'd kissed me. Twice. He said he loved me. What a scum, rat, dog bastard. I…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I am an alien huntress. I am part of the A.I.R. team, working with or against the New Chicago PD—whichever suits me at the time. Every night I stalk and kill other-worlders, and whether I’m investigating a death or causing one myself, I have to shove sentiment aside, find humor where I can, and concentrate on the facts.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the-a-i-r-team-working-with-or/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/031/gena-showalter-541_alien_i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the_1171928.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/031/gena-showalter-541_alien_i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the_1171928.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/031/gena-showalter-541_alien_i-am-an-alien-huntress-i-am-part-of-the_1171928.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I am an alien huntress. I am part of the A.I.R. team, working with or against the New Chicago PD—whichever…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“He had a bleeding cut on his leg and he smelled like shit. Her nose wrinkled. \"Step in something?\" she asked innocently. \"That I did not mind.\" He took a menacing step toward her. \"What I did mind was being hit by a cab, then landing on the lap of a naked man. With an erection, Anya. He had an erection.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he-smelled-like-shit-her-nose/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/570/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he_2881563.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/570/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he_2881563.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/570/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-had-a-bleeding-cut-on-his-leg-and-he_2881563.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“He had a bleeding cut on his leg and he smelled like shit. Her nose wrinkled. \"Step in something?\" she asked…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Forceful little thing, aren’t you?” “You have no idea. So we doing this or not?” Those lush lips twitched. “Let me get this straight. We’re going to the bathroom, and I’m going to fuck you, and you don’t even care to know my name?” “I’d actually prefer it if you’d keep your stupid mouth closed.” Oops. Her hatred was slipping out. “Well, well. You might just be my soul mate.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-have-no-idea-so-we-doing-this-or/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1b/gena-showalter-541_banter_forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-hav_1044648.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1b/gena-showalter-541_banter_forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-hav_1044648.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1b/gena-showalter-541_banter_forceful-little-thing-aren-t-you-you-hav_1044648.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Forceful little thing, aren’t you?” “You have no idea. So we doing this or not?” Those lush lips twitched…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Twenty-seven.” His brow puckered, and he blinked over at her. “Twenty-seven hundred years, right?” If he were speaking to Taliyah, yes. “No. Just twenty-seven plain, ordinary years.” “You don’t mean human years, do you?” “No. I mean dog years,” she said dryly, then pressed her lips together. Where was the filter that was usually poised over her mouth? Strider didn’t seem to mind, though. Rather, he seemed stupefied. Would Sabin have had the same reaction were he awake? “What’s so hard to believe about my age?” As the question echoed between them, a thought occurred to her and she blanched. “Do I look ancient?” “No, no. Of course not. But you’re immortal. Powerful.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-blinked-over-at-her-twenty/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eab/gena-showalter-541_age_twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-bl_281062.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eab/gena-showalter-541_age_twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-bl_281062.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/eab/gena-showalter-541_age_twenty-seven-his-brow-puckered-and-he-bl_281062.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Twenty-seven.” His brow puckered, and he blinked over at her. “Twenty-seven hundred years, right?” If he…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“That's a poweful ability you've got there. Seriously, I was Contemplating killing Cody so we could be a couple.' She snorted, but she never stopped smiling. 'We'd never make it romantically. You're too demanding in bed. \"Harder, Rome. Now, Rome. Tie me up, Rome.\"' 'Bitch,' I muttered good-naturedley. It was nice to have my friend back. 'You know you wouldn't be able to get enough of me.' 'I like where this conversation is headed,' a male voice said from the doorway. I looked past Sherridan and spotted Rome in the doorway. 'Hey, baby,' he said. 'Cat Man.' A more welcome sight I'd never beheld. My heart even picked up speed, my monitor announcing it for all the world to hear.. He stalked to me and unceremoniously shoved me aside on the bed where he plopped down and cuddled me close. 'Mad?' As if. 'I'm grateful. I was walking toward Sherridan with every intention of making out with her, so you did me a favor. She would have fallen in love with me, and then where would we have been?' 'Now I'm mad at /myself/ for stopping you,' he grumbled, and we all laughed. Men!”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-there-seriously-i-was/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d6/gena-showalter-541_belle_that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-ther_2821401.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d6/gena-showalter-541_belle_that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-ther_2821401.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d6/gena-showalter-541_belle_that-s-a-poweful-ability-you-ve-got-ther_2821401.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“That's a poweful ability you've got there. Seriously, I was Contemplating killing Cody so we could be a…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 20, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Lucien: And Flowers--but only Anya can call me that. William: Fine. I'll call you Roses. Lucien: You won't. William: I will. Zodiac sign, Roses? Lucien: First, how does my woman stand you? Second, I don't think I have a sign. I was created rather than born, and I am unsure of the day, much less the month. William: I'll just mark your sign as \"Roses\". Choice of weapon, Roses? Lucien: You are a bastard. But I like knives. I like to get up close and personal with my kills. Care for a demonstration? William: Later. What are you looking for in a woman, Roses? Lucien: Why don't I just call you Moron? Anya does…”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-call-me-that-william-fine-i-ll/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/gena-showalter-541_flowers_lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-cal_778670.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/gena-showalter-541_flowers_lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-cal_778670.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/gena-showalter-541_flowers_lucien-and-flowers-but-only-anya-can-cal_778670.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Lucien: And Flowers--but only Anya can call me that. William: Fine. I'll call you Roses. Lucien: You won't…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 21, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“He’s a love-’em-and-leave-’em kind of guy. And though he’s not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his head. I have the book to prove it.” William growled low in his throat. “Anya! Must you share my secrets with everyone?” He flattened his palms on the arms of his chair. “Fine. If you can spill, I can, too. Anya’s the reason the Titanic sank. She was playing chicken with the icebergs.” Scowling, Anya anchored her hands on her hips. “William had a bronze made of his penis and placed it on his mantel.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy-and-though-he-s-not-a-lord-he/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy_115364.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy_115364.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41e/gena-showalter-541_humor_he-s-a-love-em-and-leave-em-kind-of-guy_115364.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“He’s a love-’em-and-leave-’em kind of guy. And though he’s not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 22, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Suddenly William loomed over him, scowling, snarling and bloody, his suit dirt-stained and ripped. “Do you know. How many strands. Of hair I lost. On my way down?” Whatever. “Math was never my thing, but I’m gonna say you lost…a lot.” Electric-blues glittered with menace. “You are a cruel, sadistic bastard. My hair needs TLC and you…you… Damn you! I’ve gutted men for less.” “I know. I’ve watched you.” Paris lumbered to his feet and scanned the rocky bank they stood upon, the crimson ocean lapping and bubbling in every direction. The drawbridge was only a fifty-yard dash away. “Don’t kill the messenger, but I’m thinking you should change your dating profile to balding.” Masculine cheeks went scarlet as the big bad warrior struggled for a comeback. … “One of these days you’re going to wake up,” William finally said, “and I will have shaved you. Everywhere.” “Won’t make a difference. Women will still want me. But you know what else? What I did to you wasn’t cruel, Willy.” He offered the warrior a white-flag grin. A trick. A lie. “This, however, is.” He grabbed William by the wrist, swung the man around and around before at last releasing him and hurling his body directly onto the bridge.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowling-snarling-and-bloody-his/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27a/gena-showalter-541_fiction_suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowlin_1729902.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27a/gena-showalter-541_fiction_suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowlin_1729902.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27a/gena-showalter-541_fiction_suddenly-william-loomed-over-him-scowlin_1729902.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Suddenly William loomed over him, scowling, snarling and bloody, his suit dirt-stained and ripped. “Do you…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 23, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“William slapped him on the shoulder, sending Sex into rapturous convulsions. “Before we do this, I’ve got one question for you. And you can’t lie. This is too important.” A bit sick to his stomach at what such a debaucher could want to know, Paris cast his attention to the black-haired, blue-eyed he-devil. “Ask.” “Are you going to suggest I kiss you for good luck or strength or whatever it is your sex demon needs?” That earned the warrior a two-fingered salute. “So that’s a no?” William asked. Paris worked his jaw. “Here, let me help you off the cliff to the drawbridge.” With no more warning, he shoved William over the ledge. He thought he heard a fading, “ So not cool,” from the bastard as he fell…fell… Splat.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-sending-sex-into-rapturous/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45f/gena-showalter-541_fiction_william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-send_2586214.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45f/gena-showalter-541_fiction_william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-send_2586214.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/45f/gena-showalter-541_fiction_william-slapped-him-on-the-shoulder-send_2586214.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“William slapped him on the shoulder, sending Sex into rapturous convulsions. “Before we do this, I’ve got…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 24, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I have never battled a gargoyle before.” Zacharel shook his head, a dark lock of hair tumbling into one emerald eye. Damp from the melting snow, the hair stuck to his skin. He didn’t seem to notice. “But I am certain these will murder Paris before willingly carrying him inside.” As if he were the only intelligent life form left in existence, William splayed his arms. “And the problem with that? He’ll still be inside, exactly where he wants to be. And by the way,” he added, blinking at Paris with lashes so long they should have belonged to a girl. “Your new permanent eyeliner is very pretty. You’ll make a good-looking corpse.” Do not react. He did, and the teasing about his ash/ambrosia tattoos would never end. “Thanks.” “I prefer the lip liner, though. A nice little feminine touch that really makes your eyes pop.” “Again, thanks,” he gritted. He wants us! Stupid demon. William grinned. “Maybe we can make out later. I know you want me.” Tell him yes! Not another word out of you, or— “Paris? Warrior?” Zacharel said. “Are you listening to me?” “No.” Zach nodded, apparently not the least offended. “I enjoy your honesty, though I believe you suffer from what the humans call ADD.” “Oh, yeah. I definitely have attention deficient demon.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-zacharel-shook-his-head-a-dark/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/00c/gena-showalter-541_demon_i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-z_2178786.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/00c/gena-showalter-541_demon_i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-z_2178786.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/00c/gena-showalter-541_demon_i-have-never-battled-a-gargoyle-before-z_2178786.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I have never battled a gargoyle before.” Zacharel shook his head, a dark lock of hair tumbling into one…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 25, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“There was a dragon who had a long-standing obsession with a queen's breasts,\" she said, growing breathless. \"The dragon knew the penalty to touch her would mean death, yet he revealed his secret desire to the king's chief doctor. This man promised he could arrange for the dragon to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him one thousand gold coins.\" She spread her soapy hands over his nipples, then down his arms. \"Though he didn't have the money, the dragon readily agreed to the scheme.\" Grace,\" Darius moaned, his erection straining against her stomach. She hid her smile, loving that she had this much power over such a strong man. That she, Grace Carlyle, made him ache with longing. \"The next day the physician made a batch of itching powder and poured some into the queen's bra… uh, you might call it a brassiere… while she bathed. After she dressed, she began itching and itching and itching. The physician was summoned to the Royal Chambers, and he informed the king and queen that only a special saliva, if applied for several hours, would cure this type of itch. And only a dragon possessed this special saliva.\" Out of breath, she paused. Continue,\" Darius said. His arms wound around her so tightly she could barely breathe. His skin blazed hot against hers, hotter than even the steamy water. Are you sure?\" Continue.\" Taut lines bracketed his mouth. Well, the king summoned the dragon. Meanwhile, the physician slipped him the antidote for the itching powder, which the dragon put into his mouth, and for the next few hours, the dragon worked passionately on the queen's breasts. Anyway,\" she said, reaching around him and lathering the muscled mounds of his butt, \"the queen's itching was eventually relieved, and the dragon left satisfied and touted as a hero.\" This does not sound like a joke,\" Darius said. I'm getting to the punch line. Hang on. When the physician demanded his payment, the now satisfied dragon refused. He knew that the physician could never report what really happened to the king. So the next day, the physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the king's loincloth. And the king immediately summoned the dragon.\" -Heart of the Dragon”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Gena Showalter" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gena-showalter/there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standing-obsession-with-a-queen-s/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c0e/gena-showalter-541_humor_there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standi_2284882.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c0e/gena-showalter-541_humor_there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standi_2284882.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c0e/gena-showalter-541_humor_there-was-a-dragon-who-had-a-long-standi_2284882.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“There was a dragon who had a long-standing obsession with a queen's breasts,\" she said, growing breathless…” — Gena Showalter", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/", "name": "Humor Quotes by Gena Showalter", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e22/gena-showalter-541_damn_my-fur-is-silky-damn-it-3167043_3167043.png" }, "description": "25 Humor quotes by Gena Showalter. Plus more from Gena Showalter and more Humor sayings from other authors.", "breadcrumb": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/#breadcrumb" } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/#breadcrumb", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Topics", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Humor", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "name": "Gena Showalter", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humor/gena-showalter/" } ] }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```