---
title: "48 Hobbes Quotes By Bill Watterson"
description: "48 Hobbes quotes by Bill Watterson. Plus more from Bill Watterson and more Hobbes sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c19/bill-watterson-728_action_calvin-life-s-a-lot-more-fun-when-you-ar_2335034.png"
---

> [Calvin: Life's a lot more fun when you aren't responsible for your actions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-life-s-a-lot-more-fun-when-you-aren-t-responsible-for-your/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [The way Calvin's brain is wired you can almost hear the fuses blowing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/the-way-calvin-s-brain-is-wired-you-can-almost-hear-the-fuses-blowing/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [You know what's the rage this year? ...Hats.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/you-know-what-s-the-rage-this-year-hats/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-how-come-we-play-war-and-not-peace-calvin-too-few-role-models/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone. -Hobbes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/until-you-stalk-and-overrun-you-cannot-devour-anyone-hobbes/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [HOBBES: Virtue needs some cheaper thrills.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-virtue-needs-some-cheaper-thrills/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Virtual reality has nothing on Calvin.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/virtual-reality-has-nothing-on-calvin/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [If you don't get a goodnight kiss, you get Kafka dreams.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/if-you-don-t-get-a-goodnight-kiss-you-get-kafka-dreams/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: I'm a genius. I can't believe how smart I am. ...I've got more brains than I know what to do with.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-i-m-a-genius-i-can-t-believe-how-smart-i-am-i-ve-got-more/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [HOBBES: All this modern technology just makes people try to do everything at once.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-all-this-modern-technology-just-makes-people-try-to-do/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [I wonder where we go when we die?” “…Pittsburgh?” “You mean if we’re good or if we’re bad?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-wonder-where-we-go-when-we-die-pittsburgh-you-mean-if-we-re-good-or/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/you-know-sometimes-kids-get-bad-grades-in-school-because-the-class/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine and valleys of frustration and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/life-is-like-topography-hobbes-there-are-summits-of-happiness-and/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-say-if-a-novelty-christmas-song-is-funny-one-time-then-it-is-funny/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/a-day-can-really-slip-by-when-you-re-deliberately-avoiding-what-you/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-m-killing-time-while-i-wait-for-life-to-shower-me-with-meaning-and/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: Know what I pray for? Hobbes: What? Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-know-what-i-pray-for-hobbes-what-calvin-the-strength-to-change/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we can think faster than we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-sometimes-when-i-m-talking-my-words-can-t-keep-up-with-my/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: Dear Santa, before I submit life to your scrutiny, I demand to know who made YOU the matter of my fate?!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-dear-santa-before-i-submit-life-to-your-scrutiny-i-demand-to/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [It's gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/it-s-gratifying-to-hear-that-from-people-who-care-about-comic-art-i/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-do-you-believe-in-the-devil-you-know-a-supreme-evil-being/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [If I had rolled along with the strip's popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/if-i-had-rolled-along-with-the-strip-s-popularity-and-repeated-myself/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [As "Calvin and Hobbes" went on, the writing pushed the drawings into greater complexity. One of the jokes I really like is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/as-calvin-and-hobbes-went-on-the-writing-pushed-the-drawings-into/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that's the problem. I don't know how to spell…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/county-library-reference-desk-please-hello-yes-i-need-a-word/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [CALVIN: Isn't it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor? When you think about it, it's weird that we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-isn-t-it-strange-that-evolution-would-give-us-a-sense-of-humor/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: Look, a dead bird! Hobbes: It must've hit a window. Calvin: Isn't it beautiful? It's so delicate. Sighhh... once it's too…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-look-a-dead-bird-hobbes-it-must-ve-hit-a-window-calvin-isn-t/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [CALVIN: This whole Santa Claus thing just doesn't make sense. Why all the secrecy? Why all the mystery? If the guy exists…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-this-whole-santa-claus-thing-just-doesn-t-make-sense-why-all/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-the-more-you-know-the-harder-it-is-to-take-decisive-action/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Hobbes: What are you doing? Calvin: Being "cool." Hobbes: You look more like you're being bored. Calvin: The world bores you when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-what-are-you-doing-calvin-being-cool-hobbes-you-look-more-like/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [ \[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.\] Calvin: Ha! I've got a great word and it's on a "Double word score" box! Hobbes:… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-and-hobbes-are-playing-scrabble-calvin-ha-i-ve-got-a-great/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [I'd always enjoyed the comics more, and felt that as long as I was unemployed it would be a good chance to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-d-always-enjoyed-the-comics-more-and-felt-that-as-long-as-i-was/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/ms-wormwood-calvin-can-you-tell-us-what-lewis-and-clark-did-calvin-no/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3eb/bill-watterson-728_captains_ms-wormwood-calvin-can-you-tell-us-what_699320.png)

> [“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card. HOBBES: From Susie Derkins! CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine." HOBBES:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-hey-i-got-some-mail-it-s-a-valentine-card-hobbes-from-susie/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy... Let's go exploring!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/it-s-a-magical-world-hobbes-ol-buddy-let-s-go-exploring/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/018/bill-watterson-728_buddy_it-s-a-magical-world-hobbes-ol-buddy-let_1625586.png)

> [HOBBES: If you don't get a goodnight kiss you get Kafka dreams.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-if-you-don-t-get-a-goodnight-kiss-you-get-kafka-dreams/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [Hobbes: Do you think there's a God? Calvin: Well, somebody's out to get me!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/hobbes-do-you-think-there-s-a-god-calvin-well-somebody-s-out-to-get-me/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ecc/bill-watterson-728_calvin_hobbes-do-you-think-there-s-a-god-calvin_1277712.png)

> [Calvin: Medically speaking:. That's love?!?… Hobbes: Heck, that happened to me once, but I figured it was cooties!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-medically-speaking-that-s-love-hobbes-heck-that-happened-to-me/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [You know, sometimes the world seems like a pretty mean place.' 'That's why animals are so soft and huggy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/you-know-sometimes-the-world-seems-like-a-pretty-mean-place-that-s/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/07d/bill-watterson-728_animal_you-know-sometimes-the-world-seems-like_1617464.png)

> [I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word 'booger' in a newspaper comic strip.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-hope-some-historian-will-confirm-that-i-was-the-first-cartoonist-to/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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> [“I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-say-if-your-knees-aren-t-green-by-the-end-of-the-day-you-ought-to/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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## More by Bill Watterson

> [Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-the-more-you-know-the-harder-it-is-to-take-decisive-action/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/a-day-can-really-slip-by-when-you-re-deliberately-avoiding-what-you/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [For your information, I'm staying like this, and everyone else can just get used to it! If people don't like me the way I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/for-your-information-i-m-staying-like-this-and-everyone-else-can-just/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [I think most of us would be horrified to meet ourselves and discover what everyone else already knows about us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-think-most-of-us-would-be-horrified-to-meet-ourselves-and-discover/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [As a kid, I knew I wanted to be either a cartoonist or an astronaut. The latter was never much of a possibility, as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/as-a-kid-i-knew-i-wanted-to-be-either-a-cartoonist-or-an-astronaut/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [Miss Wormwood: Calvin, your test was an absolute disgrace! It's obvious you haven't read any of the material. Our first president was not Chef…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/miss-wormwood-calvin-your-test-was-an-absolute-disgrace-it-s-obvious/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [Calvin: Today for show and tell, I've brought a tiny miracle of nature: a single snowflake! I think we might all learn a lesson…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/calvin-today-for-show-and-tell-i-ve-brought-a-tiny-miracle-of-nature/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [United Features had given me a development contract, which meant I was to work exclusively with them and rather than completing everything on my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/united-features-had-given-me-a-development-contract-which-meant-i-was/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [What assurance do I have that your parenting isn't screwing me up?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/what-assurance-do-i-have-that-your-parenting-isn-t-screwing-me-up/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [In the right hands, a comic strip attains a beauty and elegance that, really, I would put against any other art.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/in-the-right-hands-a-comic-strip-attains-a-beauty-and-elegance-that/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [If you give a little credit to the concept of the artist, I think you ought to indulge excesses a bit, because that reflects…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/if-you-give-a-little-credit-to-the-concept-of-the-artist-i-think-you/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [I tell you all this because it's worth recognizing that there is no such thing as an overnight success. You will do well to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-tell-you-all-this-because-it-s-worth-recognizing-that-there-is-no/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that's even worse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/the-secret-to-enjoying-your-job-is-to-have-a-hobby-that-s-even-worse/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [By golly, life's too darn short to waste time trying to please every meddlesome moron who's got an idea how I ought to be!…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/by-golly-life-s-too-darn-short-to-waste-time-trying-to-please-every/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

> [I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Hollywood and Madison Avenue, poised with my cynical and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-watterson/i-m-yet-another-resource-consuming-kid-in-an-overpopulated-planet/)

[Bill Watterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-watterson/)

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                        "text": "Calvin: Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we can think faster than we speak? Hobbes: Probably so we can think twice.",
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                        "text": "Calvin: Dear Santa, before I submit life to your scrutiny, I demand to know who made YOU the matter of my fate?! Who are YOU to question my behavior, HUH??? What gives you the right?! Hobbes: Santa makes the toys, so he gets to decide who to give them to. Calvin: Oh.",
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                        "text": "It's gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, \"Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy.\"",
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                        "text": "Calvin: Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man? Hobbes: I'm not sure man needs the help.",
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                        "text": "If I had rolled along with the strip's popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now 'grieving' for 'Calvin and Hobbes' would be wishing me dead.",
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                        "text": "As \"Calvin and Hobbes\" went on, the writing pushed the drawings into greater complexity. One of the jokes I really like is that the fantasies are drawn more realistically than reality, since that says a lot about what's going on in Calvin's head.",
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                        "text": "County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that's the problem. I don't know how to spell it and I'm not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I'll stop you when...Hello?",
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                        "text": "CALVIN: Isn't it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor? When you think about it, it's weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity. We laugh at nonsense. We like it. We think it's funny. Don't you think it's odd that we appreciate absurdity? Why would we develop that way? How does it benefit us? HOBBES: I suppose if we couldn't laugh at the things that don't make sense, we couldn't react to a lot of life.",
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                        "text": "Calvin: Look, a dead bird! Hobbes: It must've hit a window. Calvin: Isn't it beautiful? It's so delicate. Sighhh... once it's too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is. You realize that nature is ruthless and our existence is very fragile, temporary, and precious. But to go on with your daily affairs, you can't really think about that...which is probably why everyone takes the world for granted and why we act so thoughtlessly. It's very confusing. I suppose it will all make sense when we grow up. Hobbes: No doubt.",
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                        "text": "CALVIN: This whole Santa Claus thing just doesn't make sense. Why all the secrecy? Why all the mystery? If the guy exists why doesn't he ever show himself and prove it? And if he doesn't exist what's the meaning of all this? HOBBES: I dunno. Isn't this a religious holiday? CALVIN: Yeah, but actually, I've got the same questions about God.",
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                        "text": "Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray. You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing. Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk. Hobbes: You're ignorant, but at least you act on it.",
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                        "text": "Hobbes: What are you doing? Calvin: Being \"cool.\" Hobbes: You look more like you're being bored. Calvin: The world bores you when you're cool. Hobbes: Look, I brought a sombrero! Now we can both be \"cool.\" Calvin: A sombrero?! Are you crazy?! Cool people don't wear sombreros! Hobbes: What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?",
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                        "text": "[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.] Calvin: Ha! I've got a great word and it's on a \"Double word score\" box! Hobbes: \"ZQFMGB\" isn't a word! It doesn't even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It's a worm found in New Guinea! Everyone knows that! Hobbes: I'm looking it up. Calvin: You do, and I'll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js! Hobbes: What's your score for ZQFMGB? Calvin: 957.",
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                        "text": "I'd always enjoyed the comics more, and felt that as long as I was unemployed it would be a good chance to pursue that and see what response I could get from asyndicate, as I didn't have anything to lose at that point. So I drew up a comic strip - this was in 1980 - and sent it off and got rejected. I continued that for five years with different comic strip examples 'til finally Calvin and Hobbes came together. But it's been a long road.",
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                        "text": "Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.",
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                        "text": "“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card. HOBBES: From Susie Derkins! CALVIN: It says \"Please be my Valentine.\" HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine! CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this? HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee! CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross! HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage! CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine! HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie! SUSIE: Hi, Calvin. CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH! SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope? CALVIN: \"Calvin, please give this to Hobbes.\" HOBBES?! HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!”",
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