---
title: "217 Ham Quotes by 191 authors"
description: "Browse 217 Ham quotes by 191 authors. Discover the best Ham sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/61b/ozzy-osbourne-685_ham_i-m-not-a-musician-i-m-a-ham-721921_721921.jpg"
---

> [I'm not a musician - I'm a ham.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ozzy-osbourne/i-m-not-a-musician-i-m-a-ham/)

[Ozzy Osbourne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ozzy-osbourne/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/61b/ozzy-osbourne-685_ham_i-m-not-a-musician-i-m-a-ham-721921_721921.jpg)

> [I was a ham. I loved singing and performing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leslie-uggams/i-was-a-ham-i-loved-singing-and-performing/)

[Leslie Uggams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leslie-uggams/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/644/leslie-uggams-6290_ham_i-was-a-ham-i-loved-singing-and-performi_3009664.jpg)

> [I'm definitely a ham for the paparazzi.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-o/i-m-definitely-a-ham-for-the-paparazzi/)

[Steve-O](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-o/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a5a/steve-o-14524_definitely_i-m-definitely-a-ham-for-the-paparazzi-2_2665004.png)

> [Ham with mustard is a meal of glory](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dodie-smith/ham-with-mustard-is-a-meal-of-glory/)

[Dodie Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dodie-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a62/dodie-smith-1724_food_ham-with-mustard-is-a-meal-of-glory-4431_443123.png)

> [West Ham have a great academy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/freddie-ljungberg/west-ham-have-a-great-academy/)

[Freddie Ljungberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/freddie-ljungberg/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/793/freddie-ljungberg-9708_academy_west-ham-have-a-great-academy-1736802_1736802.jpg)

> [Canadian bacon isn't bacon. It's ham.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/canadian-bacon-isn-t-bacon-it-s-ham/)

[Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c96/bill-maher-211_bacon_canadian-bacon-isn-t-bacon-it-s-ham-2266_2266488.png)

> [Method actors are like hams.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clark-gable/method-actors-are-like-hams/)

[Clark Gable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clark-gable/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e55/clark-gable-17010_actor_method-actors-are-like-hams-59416_59416.png)

> [I was a huge ham in school in Atlanta.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hannah-storm/i-was-a-huge-ham-in-school-in-atlanta/)

[Hannah Storm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hannah-storm/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/476/hannah-storm-23778_atlanta_i-was-a-huge-ham-in-school-in-atlanta-25_2509796.png)

> [Pellegrini was the biggest factor for me to be joining West Ham.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samir-nasri/pellegrini-was-the-biggest-factor-for-me-to-be-joining-west-ham/)

[Samir Nasri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samir-nasri/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/316/samir-nasri-5240_biggest_pellegrini-was-the-biggest-factor-for-me_1651066.jpg)

> [Yevgeny Yevtushenko is a ham actor, not a poet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allen-tate/yevgeny-yevtushenko-is-a-ham-actor-not-a-poet/)

[Allen Tate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allen-tate/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c59/allen-tate-7943_actors_yevgeny-yevtushenko-is-a-ham-actor-not-a_1524858.jpg)

> [Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/will-rogers/take-me-ham-away-take-away-my-eggs-even-my-chili-but-leave-me-my/)

[Will Rogers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/will-rogers/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5cd/will-rogers-272_chili_take-me-ham-away-take-away-my-eggs-even_320620.jpg)

> [My head looks like an uncooked ham with glasses.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-ware/my-head-looks-like-an-uncooked-ham-with-glasses/)

[Chris Ware](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-ware/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/094/chris-ware-8123_girl_my-head-looks-like-an-uncooked-ham-with_2494125.jpg)

> [Normally a grand jury will indict a ham sandwich if a prosecutor asks it to.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chuck-robb/normally-a-grand-jury-will-indict-a-ham-sandwich-if-a-prosecutor-asks/)

[Chuck Robb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chuck-robb/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/641/chuck-robb-47179_asks_normally-a-grand-jury-will-indict-a-ham_1658311.png)

> [What you believe about who you are, where you came from, affects your whole worldview.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ken-ham/what-you-believe-about-who-you-are-where-you-came-from-affects-your/)

[Ken Ham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ken-ham/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ff/ken-ham-2712_about_what-you-believe-about-who-you-are-where_2209921.png)

> [I have very special memories of the West Ham fans.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dimitri-payet/i-have-very-special-memories-of-the-west-ham-fans/)

[Dimitri Payet](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dimitri-payet/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9da/dimitri-payet-17821_fans_i-have-very-special-memories-of-the-west_750414.jpg)

> [I was voted Biggest Ham and Likeliest to Become a Celebrity.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristen-johnston/i-was-voted-biggest-ham-and-likeliest-to-become-a-celebrity/)

[Kristen Johnston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristen-johnston/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e3a/kristen-johnston-17944_biggest_i-was-voted-biggest-ham-and-likeliest-to_444308.png)

> [I definitely knew that I loved acting from the very beginning. I was such a ham growing up. Wherever the camera was,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/naya-rivera/i-definitely-knew-that-i-loved-acting-from-the-very-beginning-i-was/)

[Naya Rivera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/naya-rivera/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b82/naya-rivera-21113_acting_i-definitely-knew-that-i-loved-acting-fr_1960179.jpg)

> [I'm very happy to have moved to West Ham, because I can play for a better team than Sheffield Wednesday.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paolo-di-canio/i-m-very-happy-to-have-moved-to-west-ham-because-i-can-play-for-a/)

[Paolo Di Canio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paolo-di-canio/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/paolo-di-canio-4265_because-i-can_i-m-very-happy-to-have-moved-to-west-ham_1015982.png)

> [Compared to a novel, a film is like an economy pizza where there are no olives, no ham, no anchovies, no mushrooms,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-de-bernieres/compared-to-a-novel-a-film-is-like-an-economy-pizza-where-there-are/)

[Louis de Bernieres](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-de-bernieres/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/696/louis-de-bernieres-5492_books_compared-to-a-novel-a-film-is-like-an-ec_1862087.png)

> [Down South, even our vegetables have some pig hidden somewhere in it. A vegetable isn't a vegetable without a little ham hock.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paula-deen/down-south-even-our-vegetables-have-some-pig-hidden-somewhere-in-it-a/)

[Paula Deen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paula-deen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1b9/paula-deen-8030_food_down-south-even-our-vegetables-have-some_2007155.png)

> [The man who comes to take care of my piranhas told me that if I left West Ham he would kill all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paolo-di-canio/the-man-who-comes-to-take-care-of-my-piranhas-told-me-that-if-i-left/)

[Paolo Di Canio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paolo-di-canio/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/050/paolo-di-canio-4265_care_the-man-who-comes-to-take-care-of-my-pir_2278000.png)

> [My father was a ham radio geek, and I remember the glow of the vacuum tubes from a Hammarlund receiver that became…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bre-pettis/my-father-was-a-ham-radio-geek-and-i-remember-the-glow-of-the-vacuum/)

[Bre Pettis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bre-pettis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3b3/bre-pettis-15884_became_my-father-was-a-ham-radio-geek-and-i-rem_2228158.png)

> [I came out wanting to be an actor. From my first view of the world, that's what I wanted to be. I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-myers/i-came-out-wanting-to-be-an-actor-from-my-first-view-of-the-world/)

[Mike Myers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-myers/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3c8/mike-myers-7122_actor_i-came-out-wanting-to-be-an-actor-from-m_1309010.jpg)

> [My mom always knew I was going to be an actor because I was a ham from the very beginning, so she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aarti-mann/my-mom-always-knew-i-was-going-to-be-an-actor-because-i-was-a-ham/)

[Aarti Mann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aarti-mann/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/28d/aarti-mann-65961_actor_my-mom-always-knew-i-was-going-to-be-an_2313948.png)

> [When I'm get­ting ready to per­suade a per­son, I spend one-third of the time think­ing about myself, what I'm going to say,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emile-coue/when-i-m-get-ting-ready-to-per-suade-a-per-son-i-spend-one-third-of/)

[Emile Coue](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emile-coue/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/079/emile-coue-20568_abra_when-i-m-get-ting-ready-to-per-suade-a-p_2968651.jpg)

> [God turns clouds inside out to make fluffy beds for the dogs in Dog Heaven, and when they are tired from running…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cynthia-rylant/god-turns-clouds-inside-out-to-make-fluffy-beds-for-the-dogs-in-dog/)

[Cynthia Rylant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cynthia-rylant/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e34/cynthia-rylant-21571_animal_god-turns-clouds-inside-out-to-make-fluf_510308.jpg)

> [I understand that you take the Bible, as written in English, translated many many times over the last three millennia as to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-nye/i-understand-that-you-take-the-bible-as-written-in-english-translated/)

[Bill Nye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-nye/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/adc/bill-nye-1613_accurate_i-understand-that-you-take-the-bible-as_914650.png)

> [I've spent enough time with soldiers to know that once they get to know you and they loosen up and become themselves,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-berg/i-ve-spent-enough-time-with-soldiers-to-know-that-once-they-get-to/)

[Peter Berg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-berg/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f1f/peter-berg-14447_charismatic_i-ve-spent-enough-time-with-soldiers-to_2486048.jpg)

> [I like pork chops and country ham, creamed potatoes, stuff like that. Redeye gravy. It comes from ham, bacon, stuff like that.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elvis-presley/i-like-pork-chops-and-country-ham-creamed-potatoes-stuff-like-that/)

[Elvis Presley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elvis-presley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e59/elvis-presley-1269_country_i-like-pork-chops-and-country-ham-creame_2831321.jpg)

> [I figure it's almost like a balance. We're eating these wonderful collard greens and turnip greens which are so medicinally good for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paula-deen/i-figure-it-s-almost-like-a-balance-we-re-eating-these-wonderful/)

[Paula Deen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paula-deen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b47/paula-deen-8030_almost_i-figure-it-s-almost-like-a-balance-we-r_2785699.png)

> [I will not eat them in a house, i will not eat them with a mouse,i will not eat them in a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dr-seuss/i-will-not-eat-them-in-a-house-i-will-not-eat-them-with-a-mouse-i/)

[Dr. Seuss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dr-seuss/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/de3/dr-seuss-1224_boxes_i-will-not-eat-them-in-a-house-i-will-no_558162.jpg)

> [I was just a ham since about the age of five. If I was performing at Medieval Times or something, I'd be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emma-stone/i-was-just-a-ham-since-about-the-age-of-five-if-i-was-performing-at/)

[Emma Stone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emma-stone/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/19e/emma-stone-1673_about_i-was-just-a-ham-since-about-the-age-of_3053608.jpg)

> [Black was bestlooking. ... Ebony was the best wood, the hardest wood; it was black. Virginia ham was the best ham. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ann-petry/black-was-bestlooking-ebony-was-the-best-wood-the-hardest-wood-it-was/)

[Ann Petry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ann-petry/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3e8/ann-petry-26049_black_black-was-bestlooking-ebony-was-the-best_3031204.jpg)

> [Any part of the piggy Is quite all right with me Ham from Westphalia, ham from Parma Ham as lean as the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noel-coward/any-part-of-the-piggy-is-quite-all-right-with-me-ham-from-westphalia/)

[Noel Coward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noel-coward/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc5/noel-coward-2647_bacon_any-part-of-the-piggy-is-quite-all-right_1165375.jpg)

> [Ranger is an unusual name," she managed. "Is it a nickname?" It's a street name," Ranger said. "I was a Ranger in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-evanovich/ranger-is-an-unusual-name-she-managed-is-it-a-nickname-it-s-a-street/)

[Janet Evanovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-evanovich/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/415/janet-evanovich-291_army_ranger-is-an-unusual-name-she-managed-is_2905584.png)

> [ As an actor, if you step to the side and you look at \[Thornton's performance\] technically, and you try to imagine doing… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edward-norton/as-an-actor-if-you-step-to-the-side-and-you-look-at-thornton-s/)

[Edward Norton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edward-norton/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f09/edward-norton-2203_actors_as-an-actor-if-you-step-to-the-side-and_15751.jpg)

> [A Centaur has a man-stomach and a horse-stomach. And of course both want breakfast. So first of all he has porridge and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-centaur-has-a-man-stomach-and-a-horse-stomach-and-of-course-both/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/736/anonymous-1_bags_a-centaur-has-a-man-stomach-and-a-horse_3216359.jpg)

> [Until you have bred dogs and have drawn and painted them, it is difficult to realize that no two are identical in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-bird-evans/until-you-have-bred-dogs-and-have-drawn-and-painted-them-it-is/)

[George Bird Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-bird-evans/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/83b/george-bird-evans-72762_daily-living_until-you-have-bred-dogs-and-have-drawn_2004207.jpg)

> [From the baking aisle to the post office line to the wrapping paper bin in the attic, women populate every dark corner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-held-evans/from-the-baking-aisle-to-the-post-office-line-to-the-wrapping-paper/)

[Rachel Held Evans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-held-evans/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ce/rachel-held-evans-2876_attics_from-the-baking-aisle-to-the-post-office_2664405.png)

> [This is football from the 19th century. It's very difficult to play a football match when only one team wants to play.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jose-mourinho/this-is-football-from-the-19th-century-it-s-very-difficult-to-play-a/)

[Jose Mourinho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jose-mourinho/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/14a/jose-mourinho-2585_19th-century_this-is-football-from-the-19th-century-i_257528.jpg)

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                        "text": "My father was a ham radio geek, and I remember the glow of the vacuum tubes from a Hammarlund receiver that became a hand-me-down to me.",
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                        "text": "I came out wanting to be an actor. From my first view of the world, that's what I wanted to be. I'm made of 99 percent ham and 1 percent water. I was just cooked that way!",
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                        "text": "My mom always knew I was going to be an actor because I was a ham from the very beginning, so she would push me toward it, which is really unconventional for Indian families to do.",
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                        "text": "When I'm get­ting ready to per­suade a per­son, I spend one-third of the time think­ing about myself, what I'm going to say, and two-thirds of the time think­ing about him and what he is going to say. -Abra­ham Lincoln Always think of what you have to do as easy and it will be.",
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                        "text": "God turns clouds inside out to make fluffy beds for the dogs in Dog Heaven, and when they are tired from running and barking and eating ham-sandwich biscuits, the dogs find a cloud bed for sleeping. God watches over each one of them. And there are no bad dreams.",
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                        "text": "I understand that you take the Bible, as written in English, translated many many times over the last three millennia as to be a more accurate, more reasonable assessment of the natural laws we see around us than what I and everybody in here can observe. That, to me, is unsettling.",
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                        "text": "I've spent enough time with soldiers to know that once they get to know you and they loosen up and become themselves, they are some of the biggest hams and most charismatic, cocky, fun, humorous guys I've ever met.",
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                        "text": "I like pork chops and country ham, creamed potatoes, stuff like that. Redeye gravy. It comes from ham, bacon, stuff like that. It's the grease that you fry it in. I eat a lot of Jell-O. Fruit Jell-O.",
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                        "text": "I figure it's almost like a balance. We're eating these wonderful collard greens and turnip greens which are so medicinally good for you and, OK, so what if it has a little ham hock in it?",
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                        "text": "I will not eat them in a house, i will not eat them with a mouse,i will not eat them in a box i will not eat them with a fox, i will not eat them here of there i will not eat them anywhere, I do not like green eggs and ham i do not like them sam i am",
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                        "text": "I was just a ham since about the age of five. If I was performing at Medieval Times or something, I'd be the court jester. That was always my defense mechanism. I was never all that funny; I was just obnoxious and loud.",
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                        "text": "Black was bestlooking. ... Ebony was the best wood, the hardest wood; it was black. Virginia ham was the best ham. It was black on the outside. Tuxedos and tail coats were black and they were a man's finest, most expensive clothes. You had to use pepper to make most meats and vegetables fit to eat. The most flavorsome pepper was black. The best caviar was black. The rarest jewels were black: black opals, black pearls.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Any part of the piggy Is quite all right with me Ham from Westphalia, ham from Parma Ham as lean as the Dalai Lama Ham from Virginia, ham from York, Trotters Sausages, hot roast pork. Crackling crisp for my teeth to grind on Bacon with or without the rind on Though humanitarian I'm not a vegetarian. I'm neither crank nor prude nor prig And though it may sound infra dig Any part of the darling pig Is perfectly fine with me.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Ranger is an unusual name,\" she managed. \"Is it a nickname?\" It's a street name,\" Ranger said. \"I was a Ranger in the army.\" I heard about them Rangers on TV,\" Grandma said. \"I heard they get dogs pregnant.\" My father's mouth dropped open and a piece of ham fell out. My mother froze, her fork poised in midair. That's sort of a joke,\" I told Grandma. \"Rangers don't get dogs pregnant in real life.\" I looked at Ranger for corroboration and got another smile.",
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                        "text": "As an actor, if you step to the side and you look at [Thornton's performance] technically, and you try to imagine doing what he was doing, most people would panic. Most people would be on the set, and they would be panicking, going, \"I'm not doing anything!\" All the ham instincts in you would be screaming, \"You've got to indicate something here.\" And it's beautiful, in a way. And so I appreciate, even as an audience member, the courage that it takes to be... frankly, to be subtle.",
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                        "text": "A Centaur has a man-stomach and a horse-stomach. And of course both want breakfast. So first of all he has porridge and pavenders and kidneys and bacon and omlette and cold ham and toast and marmalade and coffee and beer. And after that he tends to the horse part of himself by grazing for an hour or so and finishing up with a hot mash, some oats, and a bag of sugar. That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weeekend. A very serious thing indeed.",
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                        "text": "Until you have bred dogs and have drawn and painted them, it is difficult to realize that no two are identical in conformation. You need do no more than gun for a day over two of them to recognize that each is an individual. It requires the intimacy of daily living with a dog to know the subtle quality of his mind, the ham-smell of his ears, and that his wet nose in your mouth tastes salty.",
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                        "text": "From the baking aisle to the post office line to the wrapping paper bin in the attic, women populate every dark corner of Christmas. Who got up at 4 a.m. to put the ham in the oven? A woman. . . . Who sent the Christmas card describing her eighteen-year-old son's incarceration as 'a short break before college?' A woman. Who remembered to include batteries at the bottom of each stocking? A woman. And who gets credit for pulling it all off? Santa.That's right. A man.",
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                        "text": "This is football from the 19th century. It's very difficult to play a football match when only one team wants to play. A football match is about two teams playing. I told Big Sam, they need points. To come here the way they did, is that acceptable? Maybe it is, they need points. The only thing I could bring more was Black & Decker - a Black & Decker to destroy the West Ham wall.",
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