---
title: "10 Guy Quotes By Adam Carolla"
description: "10 Guy quotes by Adam Carolla. Plus more from Adam Carolla and more Guy sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/417/adam-carolla-2058_guy_i-m-like-john-q-public-i-represent-what_999476.png"
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> [I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-like-john-q-public-i-represent-what-every-guy-wants-and-needs/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/417/adam-carolla-2058_guy_i-m-like-john-q-public-i-represent-what_999476.png)

> [He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/he-doesn-t-sound-like-a-guy-who-s-done-a-onesome-let-alone-a-threesome/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63d/adam-carolla-2058_done_he-doesn-t-sound-like-a-guy-who-s-done-a_3189932.png)

> [I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-a-doofus-from-the-valley-a-blue-collar-guy/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fa9/adam-carolla-2058_blue-collar_i-m-a-doofus-from-the-valley-a-blue-coll_2020942.png)

> [Well, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/well-guys-are-better-at-mechanical-stuff-and-women-are-better-at/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4ed/adam-carolla-2058_better_well-guys-are-better-at-mechanical-stuff_440231.png)

> [I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-a-sort-of-nuts-and-bolts-guy-i-m-into-turning-wrenches-and/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/781/adam-carolla-2058_car_i-m-a-sort-of-nuts-and-bolts-guy-i-m-int_2895494.png)

> [I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-harmless-i-don-t-have-any-ill-will-or-ill-thought-towards-anybody/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/76b/adam-carolla-2058_creepy_i-m-harmless-i-don-t-have-any-ill-will-o_3009573.png)

> [When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/when-you-re-picking-a-basketball-team-you-ll-take-the-brother-over/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/59b/adam-carolla-2058_basketball_when-you-re-picking-a-basketball-team-yo_559255.png)

> [If you're a guy, you have absolutely no idea what's going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here's what you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/if-you-re-a-guy-you-have-absolutely-no-idea-what-s-going-on-at-any/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1b7/adam-carolla-2058_comedy_if-you-re-a-guy-you-have-absolutely-no-i_790819.png)

> [I'd be at someone's house or be up on the roof all day and I'd get lonely - stir crazy - and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-d-be-at-someone-s-house-or-be-up-on-the-roof-all-day-and-i-d-get/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/577/adam-carolla-2058_crazy_i-d-be-at-someone-s-house-or-be-up-on-th_1759231.png)

> [Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basketball-games-every-day-of-the/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c51/adam-carolla-2058_ball-game_millions-of-guys-play-millions-of-basket_1238719.png)

## Other authors on Guy

## More by Adam Carolla

> [“One of the classier features of this home was the padded toilet seat. It was high-mileage puffy brown vinyl-colored foam and made that weird…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/one-of-the-classier-features-of-this-home-was-the-padded-toilet-seat/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-give-women-two-types-of-orgasms-fake-and-none/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life...so, something that is potentially four months down the road is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-m-really-just-trying-to-hash-out-the-next-two-weeks-of-my-life-so/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-think-i-ve-ever-seen-pie-advertised-that-s-how-you-know-it-s/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-think-healthcare-s-a-right-the-only-right-you-have-is-the/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-like-my-parents-but-they-are-just-not-good-parents-they-are-nice/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/people-have-to-be-realistic-or-the-dream-just-drags-on/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [“But our leaders can’t tell the truth. We won’t let them. We’ve created a society where the politicians aren’t allowed to criticize the people.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/but-our-leaders-can-t-tell-the-truth-we-won-t-let-them-we-ve-created/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-cook-a-little-bit-i-make-a-hungarian-dish-called-chicken-paprikash/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/when-i-m-in-power-here-s-how-i-m-gonna-put-the-country-back-on-its/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/the-main-thing-that-i-learned-from-my-horrible-job-experiences-was/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-think-comedy-has-evolved-like-every-art-form-and-people-probably-do/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/you-should-feel-good-about-yourself-because-of-your-accomplishments/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [“Here’s a handy list of warning signs of the worst people on the road. Some are tuned-out menaces, others are just assholes. Be alert,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/here-s-a-handy-list-of-warning-signs-of-the-worst-people-on-the-road/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

> [I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adam-carolla/i-don-t-have-anything-against-my-mom-but-my-family-has-no-emotional/)

[Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adam-carolla/)

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