---
title: "9 Fangs Quotes By Phyllis Diller"
description: "9 Fangs quotes by Phyllis Diller. Plus more from Phyllis Diller and more Fangs sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e04/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_once-fang-took-pep-pills-and-they-worked_2539288.png"
---

> [Once Fang took pep pills and they worked - the only time he ever ran to bed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/once-fang-took-pep-pills-and-they-worked-the-only-time-he-ever-ran-to/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e04/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_once-fang-took-pep-pills-and-they-worked_2539288.png)

> [For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/for-fang-getting-out-of-bed-in-the-morning-is-a-career-move/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e81/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_for-fang-getting-out-of-bed-in-the-morni_158054.png)

> [Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/fang-can-t-stand-to-see-trash-garbage-lying-around-the-house-he-can-t/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8d0/phyllis-diller-1622_competition_fang-can-t-stand-to-see-trash-garbage-ly_1083146.png)

> [It's true Fang and I fight, but we've never gone to bed mad. Of course, one year we were up for three…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/it-s-true-fang-and-i-fight-but-we-ve-never-gone-to-bed-mad-of-course/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/430/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_it-s-true-fang-and-i-fight-but-we-ve-nev_2640613.png)

> [Everybody knows how lazy he is. One day the neighbors saw Fang mow the lawn and I got three Get Well cards.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/everybody-knows-how-lazy-he-is-one-day-the-neighbors-saw-fang-mow-the/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d4c/phyllis-diller-1622_cards_everybody-knows-how-lazy-he-is-one-day-t_3185556.png)

> [Fang and I are always fighting. When we get up in the morning, we don't kiss; we touch gloves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/fang-and-i-are-always-fighting-when-we-get-up-in-the-morning-we-don-t/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4e7/phyllis-diller-1622_always-fighting_fang-and-i-are-always-fighting-when-we-g_3030526.png)

> [I remember once a vocational director said to Fang, "You must develop some mechanical skills - like getting out of bed."](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-remember-once-a-vocational-director-said-to-fang-you-must-develop/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/617/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_i-remember-once-a-vocational-director-sa_373224.png)

> [Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/fang-took-the-entire-family-out-for-coffee-and-donuts-the-other-night/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c2/phyllis-diller-1622_blood_fang-took-the-entire-family-out-for-coff_2289917.png)

> [Everybody knows how much time Fang spends in bed. A local store that gives a 30 days' trial on mattresses gives Fang…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/everybody-knows-how-much-time-fang-spends-in-bed-a-local-store-that/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/938/phyllis-diller-1622_bed_everybody-knows-how-much-time-fang-spend_1340329.png)

## Other authors on Fangs

## More by Phyllis Diller

> [My mother-in-law must be the probation officer I got for the crime I committed of marrying my husband.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/my-mother-in-law-must-be-the-probation-officer-i-got-for-the-crime-i/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I don't know how you feel about old age... but in my case I didn't even see it coming. It hit me from the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-don-t-know-how-you-feel-about-old-age-but-in-my-case-i-didn-t-even/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/if-it-weren-t-for-baseball-many-kids-wouldn-t-know-what-a-millionaire/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-m-the-only-woman-who-can-walk-in-central-park-at-night-and-reduce/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I was the world's ugliest baby. When I was born, the doctor slapped everybody.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-was-the-world-s-ugliest-baby-when-i-was-born-the-doctor-slapped/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/by-far-the-most-common-craving-of-pregnant-women-is-not-to-be-pregnant/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/for-fang-getting-out-of-bed-in-the-morning-is-a-career-move/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/women-want-men-careers-money-children-friends-luxury-comfort/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/i-admit-i-have-a-tremendous-sex-drive-my-boyfriend-lives-forty-miles/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/the-reason-women-don-t-play-football-is-because-11-of-them-would/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/if-you-don-t-have-wrinkles-you-haven-t-laughed-enough/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [“A smile is a curve that sets things right.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/a-smile-is-a-curve-that-sets-things-right/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Every time I go near the stove, the dog howls.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/every-time-i-go-near-the-stove-the-dog-howls/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [Some wives have model husbands, I got one that needed remodeling.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/some-wives-have-model-husbands-i-got-one-that-needed-remodeling/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

> [My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phyllis-diller/my-idea-of-exercise-is-a-good-brisk-sit/)

[Phyllis Diller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phyllis-diller/)

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