---
title: "Famous Drunk Qoutes"
description: "Browse 2,282 Drunk quotes by 1,498 authors. Discover the best Drunk sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5c4/warren-ellis-2541_drunk_that-was-a-stupid-idea-i-made-up-while-d_2908958.png"
---

> [“That was a stupid idea I made up while drunk. Why did someone build that?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/warren-ellis/that-was-a-stupid-idea-i-made-up-while-drunk-why-did-someone-build/)

[Warren Ellis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/warren-ellis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5c4/warren-ellis-2541_drunk_that-was-a-stupid-idea-i-made-up-while-d_2908958.png)

> [Any drunk who has tried to put his car where a lamppost stands is a self-educated physicist.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-koontz/any-drunk-who-has-tried-to-put-his-car-where-a-lamppost-stands-is-a/)

[Dean Koontz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-koontz/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cc0/dean-koontz-118_car_any-drunk-who-has-tried-to-put-his-car-w_1393021.jpg)

> [Thus it amounts to the same thing whether one gets drunk alone or is a leader of nations.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-paul-sartre/thus-it-amounts-to-the-same-thing-whether-one-gets-drunk-alone-or-is/)

[Jean-Paul Sartre](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-paul-sartre/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d40/jean-paul-sartre-220_drunk_thus-it-amounts-to-the-same-thing-whethe_514565.png)

> [“Hey, Haymitch, if you're not too drunk, we could use a little something for our skin." Katniss, Catching Fire”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-collins/hey-haymitch-if-you-re-not-too-drunk-we-could-use-a-little-something/)

[Suzanne Collins](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-collins/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a3a/suzanne-collins-60_catching-fire_hey-haymitch-if-you-re-not-too-drunk-we_1333578.jpg)

> [I do jump behind the bar when we're really busy, but by that point I've usually drunk too much to work.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jason-flemyng/i-do-jump-behind-the-bar-when-we-re-really-busy-but-by-that-point-i/)

[Jason Flemyng](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jason-flemyng/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/08c/jason-flemyng-22497_bars_i-do-jump-behind-the-bar-when-we-re-real_1366720.jpg)

> [They be actin like they drunk, actin-actin like they drunk.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/far-east-movement/they-be-actin-like-they-drunk-actin-actin-like-they-drunk/)

[Far East Movement](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/far-east-movement/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bfb/far-east-movement-19937_drunk_they-be-actin-like-they-drunk-actin-acti_369055.jpg)

> [“Why does anyone do anything?" "I don't know, I was really drunk at the time!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pink-floyd/why-does-anyone-do-anything-i-don-t-know-i-was-really-drunk-at-the/)

[Pink Floyd](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pink-floyd/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fe1/pink-floyd-10921_dark-side-of-the-moo_why-does-anyone-do-anything-i-don-t-know_688635.jpg)

> [Our hearts were drunk with a beauty Our eyes could never see.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-william-russell/our-hearts-were-drunk-with-a-beauty-our-eyes-could-never-see/)

[George William Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-william-russell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d93/george-william-russell-18079_beauty_our-hearts-were-drunk-with-a-beauty-our_1307728.jpg)

> [To be alone and to be drunk with your own aloneness is what meditation is all about. Be in the world, but…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rajneesh/to-be-alone-and-to-be-drunk-with-your-own-aloneness-is-what/)

[Rajneesh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rajneesh/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/684/rajneesh-54_aloneness_to-be-alone-and-to-be-drunk-with-your-ow_2928466.jpg)

> [He has been known by many names: Lucifer, Beelzabub, Belial, the Prince of Lies, Satan, and at a party once an obnoxious…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-larson/he-has-been-known-by-many-names-lucifer-beelzabub-belial-the-prince/)

[Gary Larson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-larson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b40/gary-larson-8705_belial_he-has-been-known-by-many-names-lucifer_2169684.jpg)

> [As he followed Bill back to the others a wry though came to him, born no doubt of the wine he had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-k-rowling-2/as-he-followed-bill-back-to-the-others-a-wry-though-came-to-him-born/)

[J. K. Rowling](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-k-rowling-2/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/31c/j-k-rowling-2-683_bills_as-he-followed-bill-back-to-the-others-a_147318.jpg)

> [The whole world is drunk and we're just the cocktail of the moment. Someday soon, the world will wake up, down two…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dean-martin/the-whole-world-is-drunk-and-we-re-just-the-cocktail-of-the-moment/)

[Dean Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dean-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac7/dean-martin-16200_aspirin_the-whole-world-is-drunk-and-we-re-just_3065526.png)

> [I wonder what the High Septon would have to say about the sanctity of oaths sworn while dead drunk, chained to a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-wonder-what-the-high-septon-would-have-to-say-about-the-sanctity-of/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d23/anonymous-1_drunk_i-wonder-what-the-high-septon-would-have_365538.jpg)

> [I mean, look, no matter how you feel about Bush, watching him speak is difficult. It's like- it's like watching a drunk…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tucker-carlson/i-mean-look-no-matter-how-you-feel-about-bush-watching-him-speak-is/)

[Tucker Carlson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tucker-carlson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/819/tucker-carlson-1798_bush_i-mean-look-no-matter-how-you-feel-about_47382.png)

> [I don't drink. I choose to be sober now. I have drunk over the last six years, but I just don't want…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chester-bennington/i-don-t-drink-i-choose-to-be-sober-now-i-have-drunk-over-the-last-six/)

[Chester Bennington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chester-bennington/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ab/chester-bennington-13824_drink_i-don-t-drink-i-choose-to-be-sober-now-i_1818143.jpg)

> [Both Mom and Dad were blackout, killer drinkers. Dad came to school football games drunk. I'd find Mom passed out in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mariette-hartley/both-mom-and-dad-were-blackout-killer-drinkers-dad-came-to-school/)

[Mariette Hartley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mariette-hartley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/91b/mariette-hartley-5052_ball-game_both-mom-and-dad-were-blackout-killer-dr_2922083.png)

> [Go ahead and burn it down I'm drunk and so is everyone else In this devil town They wont let me turn…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/3oh-3/go-ahead-and-burn-it-down-i-m-drunk-and-so-is-everyone-else-in-this/)

[3OH!3](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/3oh-3/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3b1/3oh-3-18982_burn_go-ahead-and-burn-it-down-i-m-drunk-and_2256795.jpg)

> [There are a lot of college writing textbooks that will include essays and short stories, and after reading the story or essay,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-sedaris/there-are-a-lot-of-college-writing-textbooks-that-will-include-essays/)

[David Sedaris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-sedaris/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3d6/david-sedaris-333_answers_there-are-a-lot-of-college-writing-textb_3032418.png)

> [Drunk text me. text me when the music is loud and there are girls dancing around you and youre not quite coherent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/drunk-text-me-text-me-when-the-music-is-loud-and-there-are-girls/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/089/anonymous-1_being-drunk_drunk-text-me-text-me-when-the-music-is_1319652.jpg)

> [I don’t intend to use beer as a crutch and drink until I pass out. So advice, keep an eye on that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristen-ashley/i-don-t-intend-to-use-beer-as-a-crutch-and-drink-until-i-pass-out-so/)

[Kristen Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristen-ashley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a83/kristen-ashley-74_advice_i-don-t-intend-to-use-beer-as-a-crutch-a_1382731.png)

> [This is interesting. Researchers have found that people who drive drunk are more dangerous on the road than drivers who are high…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-fallon/this-is-interesting-researchers-have-found-that-people-who-drive/)

[Jimmy Fallon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-fallon/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/917/jimmy-fallon-656_bells_this-is-interesting-researchers-have-fou_1277087.jpg)

> [I thought, Hey, maybe these people shouldn't be making up holidays to drink more. Maybe if they drank less they might be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-birbiglia/i-thought-hey-maybe-these-people-shouldn-t-be-making-up-holidays-to/)

[Mike Birbiglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-birbiglia/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/70c/mike-birbiglia-1343_able_i-thought-hey-maybe-these-people-shouldn_468608.png)

> [On True Blood -- I've never told anybody this -- but I was so nervous and then I was so drunk that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lizzy-caplan/on-true-blood-i-ve-never-told-anybody-this-but-i-was-so-nervous-and/)

[Lizzy Caplan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lizzy-caplan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/36e/lizzy-caplan-7868_blood_on-true-blood-i-ve-never-told-anybody-th_1313364.jpg)

> [Bottled, was he?" Said Colonel Bantry, with an Englishman's sympathy for alcoholic excess. "Oh, well, can't judge a fellow by what he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/agatha-christie/bottled-was-he-said-colonel-bantry-with-an-englishman-s-sympathy-for/)

[Agatha Christie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/agatha-christie/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90d/agatha-christie-154_alcoholics_bottled-was-he-said-colonel-bantry-with_3213031.jpg)

> [Barmaid, bring a pitcher, another round of brew. Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-buffett/barmaid-bring-a-pitcher-another-round-of-brew-honey-why-don-t-we-get/)

[Jimmy Buffett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-buffett/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cd1/jimmy-buffett-1774_alcohol_barmaid-bring-a-pitcher-another-round-of_569515.jpg)

> [But I've never been the type to be sloppy drunk in public.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michelle-beadle/but-i-ve-never-been-the-type-to-be-sloppy-drunk-in-public/)

[Michelle Beadle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michelle-beadle/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/60c/michelle-beadle-11505_been_but-i-ve-never-been-the-type-to-be-slopp_3182246.jpg)

> [I’ve never been drunk in my life. I don’t use recreational drugs.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paula-abdul/i-ve-never-been-drunk-in-my-life-i-don-t-use-recreational-drugs/)

[Paula Abdul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paula-abdul/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cee/paula-abdul-8445_drug_i-ve-never-been-drunk-in-my-life-i-don-t_1513184.jpg)

> [“When love intoxicates your heart, it is difficult for your soul to remain sober.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matshona-dhliwayo/when-love-intoxicates-your-heart-it-is-difficult-for-your-soul-to/)

[Matshona Dhliwayo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matshona-dhliwayo/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/181/matshona-dhliwayo-52_boyfriend-and-girlfr_when-love-intoxicates-your-heart-it-is-d_802590.jpg)

> [You never realize how annoying drunk people are until you are the sober one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-never-realize-how-annoying-drunk-people-are-until-you-are-the/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cad/anonymous-1_drunk-people_you-never-realize-how-annoying-drunk-peo_1291663.jpg)

> [I blew the lot on vodka and tonic, gambling and fags. Looking back, I think I overdid it on the tonic.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stan-bowles/i-blew-the-lot-on-vodka-and-tonic-gambling-and-fags-looking-back-i/)

[Stan Bowles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stan-bowles/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/94f/stan-bowles-279308_alcohol_i-blew-the-lot-on-vodka-and-tonic-gambli_1193582.png)

> [“I was nearly drunk on her scent before I even tasted her.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/meredith-wild/i-was-nearly-drunk-on-her-scent-before-i-even-tasted-her/)

[Meredith Wild](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/meredith-wild/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c0e/meredith-wild-12277_drunk_i-was-nearly-drunk-on-her-scent-before-i_2339901.jpg)

> [I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yogi-berra/i-m-in-no-condition-to-drive-wait-i-shouldn-t-listen-to-myself-i-m/)

[Yogi Berra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yogi-berra/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/338/yogi-berra-1349_conditions_i-m-in-no-condition-to-drive-wait-i-shou_910740.png)

> [“The sound of him drinking was indescribable—like dirty runoff down a storm drain.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-ramirez/the-sound-of-him-drinking-was-indescribable-like-dirty-runoff-down-a/)

[Steven Ramirez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-ramirez/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cb6/steven-ramirez-13996_chaos_the-sound-of-him-drinking-was-indescriba_589991.jpg)

> [“Shame on you. Don't tell me you've been married for an hour and you've already got eyes for another woman.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mordecai-richler/shame-on-you-don-t-tell-me-you-ve-been-married-for-an-hour-and-you-ve/)

[Mordecai Richler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mordecai-richler/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27a/mordecai-richler-13361_another-woman_shame-on-you-don-t-tell-me-you-ve-been-m_1773313.jpg)

> [“There ain't no such thing as the devil that's just god when he's drunk.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-waits/there-ain-t-no-such-thing-as-the-devil-that-s-just-god-when-he-s-drunk/)

[Tom Waits](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-waits/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1ec/tom-waits-916_god_there-ain-t-no-such-thing-as-the-devil-t_2150905.jpg)

> [“I'll show you an imaginative re-creation, my fist imaginatively re-creating your fucken face for starters.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-gaiman/i-ll-show-you-an-imaginative-re-creation-my-fist-imaginatively-re/)

[Neil Gaiman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-gaiman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cab/neil-gaiman-29_creativity_i-ll-show-you-an-imaginative-re-creation_66657.jpg)

> [Oh you’re heist-drunk Kitty Kat. And you have been since the Henley.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ally-carter/oh-you-re-heist-drunk-kitty-kat-and-you-have-been-since-the-henley/)

[Ally Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ally-carter/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f5/ally-carter-530_drunk_oh-you-re-heist-drunk-kitty-kat-and-you_2637361.png)

> [“Miles, it's only morning and you're already drunk." "No, I'm not," I weakly protested. "I'm just thirsty.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rex-pickett/miles-it-s-only-morning-and-you-re-already-drunk-no-i-m-not-i-weakly/)

[Rex Pickett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rex-pickett/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b6/rex-pickett-39716_drunk_miles-it-s-only-morning-and-you-re-alrea_460478.jpg)

> [I have never smoked and have always drunk a lot of water, but cleanse, tone and moisturise every day? No way!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tori-amos/i-have-never-smoked-and-have-always-drunk-a-lot-of-water-but-cleanse/)

[Tori Amos](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tori-amos/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1cd/tori-amos-679_cleanse_i-have-never-smoked-and-have-always-drun_1948392.png)

> [Our hearts are drunk with a beauty our eyes could never see](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/our-hearts-are-drunk-with-a-beauty-our-eyes-could-never-see/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c5b/anonymous-1_beauty_our-hearts-are-drunk-with-a-beauty-our-e_2510122.jpg)

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                        "text": "Our hearts were drunk with a beauty Our eyes could never see.",
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                        "text": "He has been known by many names: Lucifer, Beelzabub, Belial, the Prince of Lies, Satan, and at a party once an obnoxious drunk kept calling him \"Dude.\"",
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                        "text": "As he followed Bill back to the others a wry though came to him, born no doubt of the wine he had drunk. He seemed set on course to become just as reckless a godfather to Teddy Lupin as Sirius Black had been to him.",
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                        "text": "I wonder what the High Septon would have to say about the sanctity of oaths sworn while dead drunk, chained to a wall, with a sword pressed to your chest?",
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                        "text": "I mean, look, no matter how you feel about Bush, watching him speak is difficult. It's like- it's like watching a drunk man cross an icy street.",
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                        "text": "Go ahead and burn it down I'm drunk and so is everyone else In this devil town They wont let me turn around To get one last look at my baby, While she's still around Go ahead and build it up again This cities just cemeteries and forgotten nights, And my only hopes is to see you And even if I never do And I know what your thinkin' But that wont stop this drinking It's the least I can do 'Cause this life is anything but certain When they close the final curtain You'll get a glimpse of the truth 'Cause your Go ahead and burn it down I'm drunk and so is everyone else in this devil town < 3",
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                        "text": "There are a lot of college writing textbooks that will include essays and short stories, and after reading the story or essay, there will be questions such as \"Have YOU Had any experience with a pedophile in YOUR family?\" or \"When was the last time you saw YOUR mother drunk?\" and they're just really good at prompting stories. You answer the question, and sometimes that can spring into a story.",
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                        "text": "Drunk text me. text me when the music is loud and there are girls dancing around you and youre not quite coherent and youre not quite yourself. drunk text me that you love me or that you miss me or that I'm on your mind. let the alcohol tell me all the things you wont say sober.",
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                        "text": "I don’t intend to use beer as a crutch and drink until I pass out. So advice, keep an eye on that so you can get in there and get yourself drunk sex before it turns unpretty and drunk sex ends with me puking and / or passing out during the act.",
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                        "text": "This is interesting. Researchers have found that people who drive drunk are more dangerous on the road than drivers who are high on marijuana. Don't get too excited. It's mostly because the drivers using marijuana are just sitting in the Taco Bell drive-through.",
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                        "text": "I thought, Hey, maybe these people shouldn't be making up holidays to drink more. Maybe if they drank less they might be able to title their newspaper articles more specifically. For example, I would title this last article \"Drunk Driver Hits Drunk Walker Drunkety-Drunk I'm So Drunk.\"",
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                        "text": "On True Blood -- I've never told anybody this -- but I was so nervous and then I was so drunk that after I shot the scene I was going up to the crew members -- I had just met all these people the day before -- and I was going up to all of them like, 'You got a boner! You do! You've got one!' It was horrible.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Bottled, was he?\" Said Colonel Bantry, with an Englishman's sympathy for alcoholic excess. \"Oh, well, can't judge a fellow by what he does when he's drunk? When I was at Cambridge, I remember I put a certain utensil - well - well, nevermind.",
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                            "name": "Agatha Christie"
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                            "caption": "“Bottled, was he?\" Said Colonel Bantry, with an Englishman's sympathy for alcoholic excess. \"Oh, well, can't…” — Agatha Christie",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Barmaid, bring a pitcher, another round of brew. Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw?",
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                            "name": "Jimmy Buffett"
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                            "caption": "“Barmaid, bring a pitcher, another round of brew. Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw?” — Jimmy Buffett",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "But I've never been the type to be sloppy drunk in public.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I’ve never been drunk in my life. I don’t use recreational drugs.",
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                            "name": "Paula Abdul"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“When love intoxicates your heart, it is difficult for your soul to remain sober.”",
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                            "name": "Matshona Dhliwayo"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "You never realize how annoying drunk people are until you are the sober one.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I blew the lot on vodka and tonic, gambling and fags. Looking back, I think I overdid it on the tonic.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Stan Bowles"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“I was nearly drunk on her scent before I even tasted her.”",
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                            "name": "Meredith Wild"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!",
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                            "name": "Yogi Berra"
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                        "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yogi-berra/i-m-in-no-condition-to-drive-wait-i-shouldn-t-listen-to-myself-i-m/",
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