---
title: "Famous Drunk Words"
description: "Browse 2,282 Drunk quotes by 1,498 authors. Discover the best Drunk sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/148/george-r-r-martin-48_best-thing_being-randy-is-the-next-best-thing-to-be_2915651.png"
---

> [“Being randy is the next best thing to being drunk.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-r-r-martin/being-randy-is-the-next-best-thing-to-being-drunk/)

[George R.R. Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-r-r-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/148/george-r-r-martin-48_best-thing_being-randy-is-the-next-best-thing-to-be_2915651.png)

> [Drunk people are annoying when you're sober.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/drunk-people-are-annoying-when-you-re-sober/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82f/anonymous-1_annoying-people_drunk-people-are-annoying-when-you-re-so_1508311.jpg)

> [My uncle was the town drunk - and we lived in Chicago.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-gobel/my-uncle-was-the-town-drunk-and-we-lived-in-chicago/)

[George Gobel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-gobel/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/704/george-gobel-38902_chicago_my-uncle-was-the-town-drunk-and-we-lived_2409275.png)

> [I have been drunk now for over two weeks.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-buffett/i-have-been-drunk-now-for-over-two-weeks/)

[Jimmy Buffett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-buffett/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f5/jimmy-buffett-1774_drunk_i-have-been-drunk-now-for-over-two-weeks_3010252.jpg)

> [If tears were liquor/ I'd have drunk myself sick,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-lanegan/if-tears-were-liquor-i-d-have-drunk-myself-sick/)

[Mark Lanegan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-lanegan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ff4/mark-lanegan-3674_drunk_if-tears-were-liquor-i-d-have-drunk-myse_2746089.jpg)

> [“All the same you needed to be a little drunk to die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/graham-greene/all-the-same-you-needed-to-be-a-little-drunk-to-die/)

[Graham Greene](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/graham-greene/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/93a/graham-greene-441_death_all-the-same-you-needed-to-be-a-little-d_2612618.jpg)

> [“I get drunk by the thought of you”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ismaaciil-c-ubax/i-get-drunk-by-the-thought-of-you/)

[Ismaaciil C. Ubax](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ismaaciil-c-ubax/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/63c/ismaaciil-c-ubax-8225_love_i-get-drunk-by-the-thought-of-you-133161_1331613.jpg)

> [God watches over drunks and third baseman.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/leo-durocher/god-watches-over-drunks-and-third-baseman/)

[Leo Durocher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/leo-durocher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2d9/leo-durocher-14159_drunk_god-watches-over-drunks-and-third-basema_84394.jpg)

> [I am as drunk as a lord, but then, I am one, so what does it matter ?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bertrand-russell/i-am-as-drunk-as-a-lord-but-then-i-am-one-so-what-does-it-matter/)

[Bertrand Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bertrand-russell/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/711/bertrand-russell-69_alcohol_i-am-as-drunk-as-a-lord-but-then-i-am-on_2268602.jpg)

> [I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/w-c-fields/i-ve-been-drunk-only-once-in-my-life-but-that-lasted-for-twenty-three/)

[W. C. Fields](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/w-c-fields/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5a5/w-c-fields-1625_drunk_i-ve-been-drunk-only-once-in-my-life-but_1822287.png)

> [When your companions get drunk and fight, take up your hat and wish them good night](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/proverb/when-your-companions-get-drunk-and-fight-take-up-your-hat-and-wish/)

[Proverb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/proverb/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4bd/proverb-957_drinking_when-your-companions-get-drunk-and-fight_3111576.jpg)

> [Hey I have waited so long, to gather up my courage she has got me love drunk fumbling my words.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jls/hey-i-have-waited-so-long-to-gather-up-my-courage-she-has-got-me-love/)

[JLS](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jls/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2b6/jls-20592_courage_hey-i-have-waited-so-long-to-gather-up-m_1980228.jpg)

> [“There’s no better way for a woman to punish a man than to make him sleep away from her.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-ramirez/there-s-no-better-way-for-a-woman-to-punish-a-man-than-to-make-him/)

[Steven Ramirez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-ramirez/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f94/steven-ramirez-13996_better-way_there-s-no-better-way-for-a-woman-to-pun_2132084.jpg)

> [“Oh my God. I'm not Keith Richards. I'm Otis from Mayberry! A fucking drunk!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-mustaine/oh-my-god-i-m-not-keith-richards-i-m-otis-from-mayberry-a-fucking/)

[Dave Mustaine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-mustaine/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f86/dave-mustaine-8615_beer_oh-my-god-i-m-not-keith-richards-i-m-oti_2528499.png)

> [One reason I dont drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/one-reason-i-dont-drink-is-that-i-want-to-know-when-i-am-having-a/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/a55/anonymous-1_drink_one-reason-i-dont-drink-is-that-i-want-t_2900913.jpg)

> [“What are you going to do with the money Anne? Let's all go up town and get drunk!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lucy-maud-montgomery/what-are-you-going-to-do-with-the-money-anne-let-s-all-go-up-town-and/)

[Lucy Maud Montgomery](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lucy-maud-montgomery/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a3/lucy-maud-montgomery-1934_drunk_what-are-you-going-to-do-with-the-money_2152102.png)

> [Anyone who shoots a real gun at you when drunk and angry is simply not husband material, regardless of his taste in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-tiptree-jr/anyone-who-shoots-a-real-gun-at-you-when-drunk-and-angry-is-simply/)

[James Tiptree Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-tiptree-jr/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/245/james-tiptree-jr-20790_angry_anyone-who-shoots-a-real-gun-at-you-when_706168.png)

> [I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I'd get pulled over by the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-hicks/i-used-to-drink-i-did-i-had-to-quit-man-i-was-an-embarrassing-drunk-i-2/)

[Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-hicks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/80b/bill-hicks-970_alcohol_i-used-to-drink-i-did-i-had-to-quit-man_3205502.jpg)

> [I have fought my fight, I have lived my life, I have drunk my share of wine; From Trier to Coln there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-kingsley/i-have-fought-my-fight-i-have-lived-my-life-i-have-drunk-my-share-of/)

[Charles Kingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-kingsley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/74c/charles-kingsley-1896_drunk_i-have-fought-my-fight-i-have-lived-my-l_2098402.png)

> [“All I wanted for Christmas was a New Years Eve party that I would never forget. Too bad I got too drunk…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carroll-bryant/all-i-wanted-for-christmas-was-a-new-years-eve-party-that-i-would/)

[Carroll Bryant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carroll-bryant/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/999/carroll-bryant-8928_christmas_all-i-wanted-for-christmas-was-a-new-yea_2681440.jpg)

> [“I give you my drunk permission to ignore whatever the sober me tells you. You should like the drunk me better, anyway,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-k-lilley/i-give-you-my-drunk-permission-to-ignore-whatever-the-sober-me-tells/)

[R.K. Lilley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-k-lilley/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f5c/r-k-lilley-1565_quote_i-give-you-my-drunk-permission-to-ignore_916479.jpg)

> [I didn't show up at the ceremony to collect any of my first three Oscars. Once I went fishing, another time there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ford/i-didn-t-show-up-at-the-ceremony-to-collect-any-of-my-first-three/)

[John Ford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ford/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/536/john-ford-14442_another-time_i-didn-t-show-up-at-the-ceremony-to-coll_2452833.jpg)

> [It's not name dropping, but not many people can say, like me, that they spent the day with the likes of Francis…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-bernard/it-s-not-name-dropping-but-not-many-people-can-say-like-me-that-they/)

[Jeffrey Bernard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-bernard/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ffd/jeffrey-bernard-23628_boring_it-s-not-name-dropping-but-not-many-peop_1723759.jpg)

> [“She gave herself a hard twist and fell into a sitting position, staring at me with those maggot-filled doll’s eyes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-ramirez/she-gave-herself-a-hard-twist-and-fell-into-a-sitting-position/)

[Steven Ramirez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-ramirez/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/237/steven-ramirez-13996_chaos_she-gave-herself-a-hard-twist-and-fell-i_2295425.jpg)

> [Women are brilliant. Every woman knows how to do the weirdest thing right out of the bucket. Every woman knows how to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-allen/women-are-brilliant-every-woman-knows-how-to-do-the-weirdest-thing/)

[Tim Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-allen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3ba/tim-allen-4974_blow_women-are-brilliant-every-woman-knows-ho_2563909.jpg)

> [Let us have wine and woman, mirth and laughter, Sermons and soda water the day after. Man, being reasonable, must get drunk;…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/let-us-have-wine-and-woman-mirth-and-laughter-sermons-and-soda-water/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/da3/anonymous-1_ache_let-us-have-wine-and-woman-mirth-and-lau_591596.jpg)

> [I've never had something - like, you know, drunk people have tried to do that to me, and I instantly shut it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/seth-rogen/i-ve-never-had-something-like-you-know-drunk-people-have-tried-to-do/)

[Seth Rogen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/seth-rogen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aec/seth-rogen-1831_drunk_i-ve-never-had-something-like-you-know-d_874619.jpg)

> [Go to bed, you fool," Calcifer said sleepily. "You're drunk." "Who, me?" said Howl. "I assure you, my friends, I am cone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/diana-wynne-jones/go-to-bed-you-fool-calcifer-said-sleepily-you-re-drunk-who-me-said/)

[Diana Wynne Jones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/diana-wynne-jones/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/532/diana-wynne-jones-1486_bed_go-to-bed-you-fool-calcifer-said-sleepil_1178445.jpg)

> [In a field, I am the absence of field. In a crowd, I am the absence of crowd. In a dream, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/in-a-field-i-am-the-absence-of-field-in-a-crowd-i-am-the-absence-of-3/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2f8/anonymous-1_absence_in-a-field-i-am-the-absence-of-field-in_3175358.jpg)

> [Playing a drunk doesn't mean being a drunk, only bad actors try to be drunk. A real drunk tries to be sober,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-landau/playing-a-drunk-doesn-t-mean-being-a-drunk-only-bad-actors-try-to-be/)

[Martin Landau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-landau/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/83e/martin-landau-3492_character_playing-a-drunk-doesn-t-mean-being-a-dru_859156.jpg)

> [The visual is sorely undervalued in modern scholarship. Art history has attained only a fraction of the conceptual sophistication of literary criticism.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/camille-paglia/the-visual-is-sorely-undervalued-in-modern-scholarship-art-history/)

[Camille Paglia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/camille-paglia/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0dc/camille-paglia-652_art_the-visual-is-sorely-undervalued-in-mode_1635364.png)

> [Half of them kept repeating my name, trying to get it right, while the other half laughed. But they were harmless. Fun…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jay-asher/half-of-them-kept-repeating-my-name-trying-to-get-it-right-while-the/)

[Jay Asher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jay-asher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cea/jay-asher-888_clay_half-of-them-kept-repeating-my-name-tryi_2265850.png)

> [My boss didn't know I drunk until I came to work sober.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kiara-leigh/my-boss-didn-t-know-i-drunk-until-i-came-to-work-sober/)

[Kiara Leigh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kiara-leigh/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/56d/kiara-leigh-6479_being-drunk_my-boss-didn-t-know-i-drunk-until-i-came_2202621.jpg)

> [It pays to get drunk with the best people.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-e-lewis/it-pays-to-get-drunk-with-the-best-people/)

[Joe E. Lewis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-e-lewis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/746/joe-e-lewis-20279_drunk_it-pays-to-get-drunk-with-the-best-peopl_1843346.jpg)

> [Favorite: I do not get drunk- I get awsome!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simba/favorite-i-do-not-get-drunk-i-get-awsome/)

[Simba](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simba/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/899/simba-32571_drunk_favorite-i-do-not-get-drunk-i-get-awsome_2834493.jpg)

> [“Wanting to be drunk, needing to stay sober.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caitl-n-r-kiernan/wanting-to-be-drunk-needing-to-stay-sober/)

[Caitlín R. Kiernan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caitl-n-r-kiernan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4b5/caitl-n-r-kiernan-17501_drunk_wanting-to-be-drunk-needing-to-stay-sobe_2919666.png)

> [If you feelin' drunk put ya hands in the air](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lmfao/if-you-feelin-drunk-put-ya-hands-in-the-air/)

[LMFAO](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lmfao/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b6a/lmfao-10460_drunk_if-you-feelin-drunk-put-ya-hands-in-the_429128.jpg)

> [I stopped drinking, but only when I sleep.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-stopped-drinking-but-only-when-i-sleep/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/213/anonymous-1_drinking_i-stopped-drinking-but-only-when-i-sleep_2524041.jpg)

> [I'm drunk. Correct. What the f\*\*\* is it to you?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/calamity-jane/i-m-drunk-correct-what-the-f-is-it-to-you/)

[Calamity Jane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/calamity-jane/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/446/calamity-jane-29281_correct_i-m-drunk-correct-what-the-f-is-it-to-yo_2688004.png)

> [“Don't judge. I'm not getting drunk. I'm coping.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-s-king/don-t-judge-i-m-not-getting-drunk-i-m-coping/)

[A.S. King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-s-king/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/096/a-s-king-2293_coping_don-t-judge-i-m-not-getting-drunk-i-m-co_2662649.png)

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                        "text": "I have fought my fight, I have lived my life, I have drunk my share of wine; From Trier to Coln there was never a knight Led a merrier life than mine.",
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                        "text": "“All I wanted for Christmas was a New Years Eve party that I would never forget. Too bad I got too drunk to remember it.”",
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                        "text": "I didn't show up at the ceremony to collect any of my first three Oscars. Once I went fishing, another time there was a war on, and on another occasion, I remember, I was suddenly taken drunk.",
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                        "text": "It's not name dropping, but not many people can say, like me, that they spent the day with the likes of Francis Bacon or that boring drunk Dylan Thomas. You don't forget things like that.",
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                        "text": "Women are brilliant. Every woman knows how to do the weirdest thing right out of the bucket. Every woman knows how to do that Hindu head wrap with the towel out of the shower. A typhoon couldn't blow that thing off their heads. Ever try to do that? You look like a drunk Iraqi soldier.",
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                        "text": "Let us have wine and woman, mirth and laughter, Sermons and soda water the day after. Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; The best of life is but intoxication: Glory, the grape, love, gold, in these are sunk The hopes of all men, and of every nation; Without their sap, how branchless were the trunk Of life's strange tree, so fruitful on occasion: But to return--Get very drunk; and when You wake with head-ache, you shall see what then.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I've never had something - like, you know, drunk people have tried to do that to me, and I instantly shut it off. I say, don't to this, dude; you'll feel terrible about this later. It'll be - I'll bring it up all the time; I'll make fun of you. Just save yourself the embarrassment and don't do it.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Go to bed, you fool,\" Calcifer said sleepily. \"You're drunk.\" \"Who, me?\" said Howl. \"I assure you, my friends, I am cone sold stober.\" He got up and stalked upstairs, feeling for the wall as if he thought it might escape him unless he kept in touch with it. His bedroom door did escape him.",
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                        "text": "In a field, I am the absence of field. In a crowd, I am the absence of crowd. In a dream, I am the absence of dream. But I don't want to live as an absence. I move to keep things whole. Because sometimes I feel drunk on positivity. Sometimes I feel amazement at the tangle of words and lives, and I want to be a part of that tangle.",
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                        "text": "Playing a drunk doesn't mean being a drunk, only bad actors try to be drunk. A real drunk tries to be sober, he wants another drink. How a character hides their feelings tells us who they are, no one shows their feelings except bad actors.",
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                        "text": "The visual is sorely undervalued in modern scholarship. Art history has attained only a fraction of the conceptual sophistication of literary criticism. Drunk with self-love, criticism has hugely overestimated the centrality of language to western culture. It has failed to see the electrifying sign language of images.",
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                        "text": "Half of them kept repeating my name, trying to get it right, while the other half laughed. But they were harmless. Fun drunks make a nice addition to any party: Not looking to fight. Not looking to score. Just looking to get drunk and laugh. I remember those guys. Like the mascots of the party. \"Clay! Whatcha doon here? Bah-ha-ha-ha!",
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                        "text": "My boss didn't know I drunk until I came to work sober.",
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                        "text": "It pays to get drunk with the best people.",
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