--- title: "5 Department Quotes By David Letterman" description: "5 Department quotes by David Letterman. Plus more from David Letterman and more Department sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f07/david-letterman-378_cities_this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-depa_150601.jpg" --- > [This warning from the New York City Department of Health Fraud: Be suspicious of any doctor who tries to take your temperature…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-department-of-health-fraud-be/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f07/david-letterman-378_cities_this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-depa_150601.jpg) > [You folks feeling the economic pinch? Are you a little fed up with the economic news? It's bad. The department stores, this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/you-folks-feeling-the-economic-pinch-are-you-a-little-fed-up-with-the/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/404/david-letterman-378_bad-news_you-folks-feeling-the-economic-pinch-are_1476736.jpg) > [There's some kind of a thing where when she was Secretary of State she was using her own e-mail instead of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/there-s-some-kind-of-a-thing-where-when-she-was-secretary-of-state/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/209/david-letterman-378_clinton_there-s-some-kind-of-a-thing-where-when_2088520.jpg) > [North Korean dictator Kim Jung Il may be stepping down. Yeah, experts in the State Department say he could be replaced by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/north-korean-dictator-kim-jung-il-may-be-stepping-down-yeah-experts/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/50c/david-letterman-378_department_north-korean-dictator-kim-jung-il-may-be_2517977.jpg) > [I was talking to a friend about Santorum. He said, 'For all my years in the State Department, I know one thing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/i-was-talking-to-a-friend-about-santorum-he-said-for-all-my-years-in/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c75/david-letterman-378_department_i-was-talking-to-a-friend-about-santorum_2658699.jpg) ## Other authors on Department ## More by David Letterman > [Two things you need to know about taxes. They've extended the deadline to April 18, and when you write your check, just make it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/two-things-you-need-to-know-about-taxes-they-ve-extended-the-deadline/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [You know Kim Jong Un, the evil dictator of North Korea? Apparently, a guy in his inner circle used his ashtray while smoking and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/you-know-kim-jong-un-the-evil-dictator-of-north-korea-apparently-a/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [It's the first day of spring. That means this weekend I'll take down my Christmas lights.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/it-s-the-first-day-of-spring-that-means-this-weekend-i-ll-take-down/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [There are a lot of New York City Thanksgiving traditions. For example, a lot of New Yorkers don't buy the frozen Thanksgiving turkey. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/there-are-a-lot-of-new-york-city-thanksgiving-traditions-for-example/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [I can hardly wait until Donald Trump announces his celebrity cabinet.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/i-can-hardly-wait-until-donald-trump-announces-his-celebrity-cabinet/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [Experts say this global warming is serious, and they are predicting now that by the year 2050, we will be out of party ice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/experts-say-this-global-warming-is-serious-and-they-are-predicting/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [We make a lot of fun at President Clinton's expense. But this transition is going to be tough because it's been 25 years since…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/we-make-a-lot-of-fun-at-president-clinton-s-expense-but-this/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [I'm worried about John Kerry, he's so confident now that he's already planning his White House sex scandal.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/i-m-worried-about-john-kerry-he-s-so-confident-now-that-he-s-already/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [“There is no off position on the genius”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/there-is-no-off-position-on-the-genius/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/i-vote-democrat-because-i-m-way-too-irresponsible-to-own-a-gun-and-i/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [Do I think there is a heaven? Uh, yeah I do. Like a really big gymnasium. How do I see myself there? With really…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/do-i-think-there-is-a-heaven-uh-yeah-i-do-like-a-really-big-gymnasium/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [If it wasn't for coffee, I'd have no discernible personality at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/if-it-wasn-t-for-coffee-i-d-have-no-discernible-personality-at-all/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [Well, we're just a couple of weeks from new President Barack Obama being sworn in. And he's been very busy naming a lot of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/well-we-re-just-a-couple-of-weeks-from-new-president-barack-obama/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/sometimes-when-you-look-in-his-eyes-you-get-the-feeling-that-someone/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) > [Prince William and Kate Middleton are in New York City. We have got to do something about immigration.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/prince-william-and-kate-middleton-are-in-new-york-city-we-have-got-to/) [David Letterman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-letterman/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/department/david-letterman/#itemlist", "name": "5 Department Quotes By David Letterman", "numberOfItems": 5, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "This warning from the New York City Department of Health Fraud: Be suspicious of any doctor who tries to take your temperature with his finger.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "David Letterman" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-letterman/this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-department-of-health-fraud-be/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f07/david-letterman-378_cities_this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-depa_150601.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f07/david-letterman-378_cities_this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-depa_150601.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f07/david-letterman-378_cities_this-warning-from-the-new-york-city-depa_150601.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“This warning from the New York City Department of Health Fraud: Be suspicious of any doctor who tries to…” — David Letterman", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You folks feeling the economic pinch? 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