---
title: "4 Checks Quotes By Stephen Colbert"
description: "4 Checks quotes by Stephen Colbert. Plus more from Stephen Colbert and more Checks sayings from other authors."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d16/stephen-colbert-503_bigs_if-you-imitate-someone-you-owe-them-a-ro_555433.png"
---

> [If you imitate someone, you owe them a royalty check. If you emulate them, you don't. There's a big difference. Check your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/if-you-imitate-someone-you-owe-them-a-royalty-check-if-you-emulate/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d16/stephen-colbert-503_bigs_if-you-imitate-someone-you-owe-them-a-ro_555433.png)

> [Cameras are dangerous. With no waiting period or background check, any whack-job could just stroll into a Wal-Mart and walk out with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/cameras-are-dangerous-with-no-waiting-period-or-background-check-any/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c88/stephen-colbert-503_background-checks_cameras-are-dangerous-with-no-waiting-pe_993094.jpg)

> [Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/here-s-how-it-works-the-president-makes-decisions-he-s-the-decider/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cab/stephen-colbert-503_belief_here-s-how-it-works-the-president-makes_2016311.png)

> [I gut check my show. I say, I say, "Gut, gut, does that feel true to you?" And Gut says, "Yes it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/i-gut-check-my-show-i-say-i-say-gut-gut-does-that-feel-true-to-you/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c30/stephen-colbert-503_checks_i-gut-check-my-show-i-say-i-say-gut-gut_2377341.png)

## Other authors on Checks

## More by Stephen Colbert

> [Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/don-t-be-bitter-everybody-suffers-if-you-can-accept-your-suffering/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/cynicism-masquerades-as-wisdom-but-it-is-the-farthest-thing-from-it/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [We all deserve credit for this new surveillance state that we live in because we the people voted for the Patriot Act. Democrats and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/we-all-deserve-credit-for-this-new-surveillance-state-that-we-live-in/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [I've long been against illegal aliens, partly because they distract us from an even bigger threat: real aliens.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/i-ve-long-been-against-illegal-aliens-partly-because-they-distract-us/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Believe in me, cause I don't believe in anything, and I wanna be someone to believe.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/believe-in-me-cause-i-don-t-believe-in-anything-and-i-wanna-be/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [It's August, which means Congress is on recess and Mitch McConnell has shimmied back into the ocean to seek a mate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/it-s-august-which-means-congress-is-on-recess-and-mitch-mcconnell-has/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Try to love others and serve others and hopefully find those who love and serve you in return.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/try-to-love-others-and-serve-others-and-hopefully-find-those-who-love/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Thirty seconds is the exact amount of time Americans can tolerate something they don't understand.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/thirty-seconds-is-the-exact-amount-of-time-americans-can-tolerate/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/i-used-to-make-up-stuff-in-my-bio-all-the-time-that-i-used-to-be-a/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [I live by syllogisms: God is love. Love is blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God. I don't know what I'd…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/i-live-by-syllogisms-god-is-love-love-is-blind-stevie-wonder-is-blind/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [“Unlike Paul Newman, who seems to think that salad dressing is the cure-all for America's ills, I'm a man of action.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/unlike-paul-newman-who-seems-to-think-that-salad-dressing-is-the-cure/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/now-for-my-younger-viewers-out-there-a-book-is-something-we-used-to/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Jesus forgives sinners, not criminals.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/jesus-forgives-sinners-not-criminals/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [Used books are the sluts of the literary world. Passed around from person to person, spreading their pages for anyone, getting cheaper and cheaper…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/used-books-are-the-sluts-of-the-literary-world-passed-around-from/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

> [“Divorce is a marital welfare. It's just couples asking society to bail them out because they didn't do enough research before they got married.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/divorce-is-a-marital-welfare-it-s-just-couples-asking-society-to-bail/)

[Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/)

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