---
title: "157 Certificates Quotes by 123 authors"
description: "Browse 157 Certificates quotes by 123 authors. Discover the best Certificates sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b57/roland-barthes-1062_certificate_every-photograph-is-a-certificate-of-pre_1204631.png"
---

> [Every photograph is a certificate of presence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roland-barthes/every-photograph-is-a-certificate-of-presence/)

[Roland Barthes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roland-barthes/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b57/roland-barthes-1062_certificate_every-photograph-is-a-certificate-of-pre_1204631.png)

> [The only name on my birth certificate was Henley, no first name.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rickey-henderson/the-only-name-on-my-birth-certificate-was-henley-no-first-name/)

[Rickey Henderson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rickey-henderson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/65e/rickey-henderson-10286_birth_the-only-name-on-my-birth-certificate-wa_139460.jpg)

> [“You wives with your certificates for loving.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nancy-horan/you-wives-with-your-certificates-for-loving/)

[Nancy Horan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nancy-horan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/835/nancy-horan-13138_certificates_you-wives-with-your-certificates-for-lov_3136096.png)

> [I was an ugly baby. On my birth certificate there was a listing for Probable Cause.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ronnie-shakes/i-was-an-ugly-baby-on-my-birth-certificate-there-was-a-listing-for/)

[Ronnie Shakes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ronnie-shakes/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/595/ronnie-shakes-33878_baby_i-was-an-ugly-baby-on-my-birth-certifica_1296994.jpg)

> [Bonds are guaranteed certificates of confiscation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/franz-pick/bonds-are-guaranteed-certificates-of-confiscation/)

Franz Pick

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9d3/franz-pick-70325_bonds_bonds-are-guaranteed-certificates-of-con_30444.jpg)

> [Honey, I plan to marry you the moment the ink is dry on that death certificate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sara-gruen/honey-i-plan-to-marry-you-the-moment-the-ink-is-dry-on-that-death/)

[Sara Gruen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sara-gruen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/82d/sara-gruen-3385_certificates_honey-i-plan-to-marry-you-the-moment-the_1922501.png)

> [Nowhere on your birth certificate did it say life would be fair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/nowhere-on-your-birth-certificate-did-it-say-life-would-be-fair/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/64f/anonymous-1_birth_nowhere-on-your-birth-certificate-did-it_2328554.jpg)

> [Check your spiritual birth certificate, you were made in the mighty image of God.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/check-your-spiritual-birth-certificate-you-were-made-in-the-mighty/)

[Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5de/joel-osteen-194_birth_check-your-spiritual-birth-certificate-y_2710858.jpg)

> [Reading is such a personal thing to me. I'd much rather give someone a gift certificate to a bookstore, and let that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erik-larson/reading-is-such-a-personal-thing-to-me-i-d-much-rather-give-someone-a/)

[Erik Larson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erik-larson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb7/erik-larson-1710_book_reading-is-such-a-personal-thing-to-me-i_3222210.jpg)

> [I'm not saying my mother didn't like me, but she kept looking for loopholes in my birth certificate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/les-dawson/i-m-not-saying-my-mother-didn-t-like-me-but-she-kept-looking-for/)

[Les Dawson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/les-dawson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e2d/les-dawson-11947_birth_i-m-not-saying-my-mother-didn-t-like-me_2104898.jpg)

> [When I was born my father spent three weeks trying to find a loophole in my birth certificate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jackie-vernon/when-i-was-born-my-father-spent-three-weeks-trying-to-find-a-loophole/)

Jackie Vernon

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6bc/jackie-vernon-74337_birth_when-i-was-born-my-father-spent-three-we_3086102.png)

> [I don't know how old I am because a goat ate the Bible that had my birth certificate in it. The goat…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/satchel-paige/i-don-t-know-how-old-i-am-because-a-goat-ate-the-bible-that-had-my/)

[Satchel Paige](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/satchel-paige/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fff/satchel-paige-11316_bible_i-don-t-know-how-old-i-am-because-a-goat_1698647.jpg)

> [I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/i-ll-show-you-obama-s-birth-certificate-when-you-show-me-sarah-palin/)

[Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc2/bill-maher-211_birth_i-ll-show-you-obama-s-birth-certificate_1219281.png)

> [I've started collecting taxidermy: I've got a red squirrel, called Steve. I made sure he came with certificates so we know he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-darvill/i-ve-started-collecting-taxidermy-i-ve-got-a-red-squirrel-called/)

[Arthur Darvill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-darvill/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f2b/arthur-darvill-30667_certificates_i-ve-started-collecting-taxidermy-i-ve-g_3090296.png)

> [I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/milton-berle/i-gave-my-wife-a-twenty-five-dollar-gift-certificate-she-used-it-as-a/)

[Milton Berle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/milton-berle/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3cb/milton-berle-3246_certificates_i-gave-my-wife-a-twenty-five-dollar-gift_751087.png)

> [I was trying to find out who my father was. They say that at that time, that if you are illegitimate, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eartha-kitt/i-was-trying-to-find-out-who-my-father-was-they-say-that-at-that-time/)

[Eartha Kitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eartha-kitt/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bf9/eartha-kitt-4073_certificates_i-was-trying-to-find-out-who-my-father-w_206239.jpg)

> [Donald Trump brought up the issue of the birth certificate and it's getting huge buzz around the country. Even Chris Matthews has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sean-hannity/donald-trump-brought-up-the-issue-of-the-birth-certificate-and-it-s/)

[Sean Hannity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sean-hannity/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5b7/sean-hannity-3295_birth_donald-trump-brought-up-the-issue-of-the_2852323.jpg)

> [The world is deathly ill. It is dying. The Great Physician has already signed the death certificate. Yet, there is still a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/corrie-ten-boom/the-world-is-deathly-ill-it-is-dying-the-great-physician-has-already/)

[Corrie Ten Boom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/corrie-ten-boom/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54f/corrie-ten-boom-1733_certificates_the-world-is-deathly-ill-it-is-dying-the_199630.jpg)

> [The umlaut isn't on my birth certificate. I had this book as a child called Chloe and Maude, and there was an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chloe-sevigny/the-umlaut-isn-t-on-my-birth-certificate-i-had-this-book-as-a-child/)

[Chloe Sevigny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chloe-sevigny/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2d1/chloe-sevigny-7352_birth_the-umlaut-isn-t-on-my-birth-certificate_632271.jpg)

> [The calf scramble will be during both rodeo performances and consist of children attempting to catch and halter several loose calves. If…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kim-carnes/the-calf-scramble-will-be-during-both-rodeo-performances-and-consist/)

[Kim Carnes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kim-carnes/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9ec/kim-carnes-38292_animal_the-calf-scramble-will-be-during-both-ro_2542338.jpg)

> [The online credential, the online certificate is very different from an on campus certificate. And we really believe that online learning and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-online-credential-the-online-certificate-is-very-different-from/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6c8/anonymous-1_believe_the-online-credential-the-online-certifi_2443528.jpg)

> [It occurred to me that I would like to be a poet. The chief qualification, I understand is that you must be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hector-hugh-munro/it-occurred-to-me-that-i-would-like-to-be-a-poet-the-chief/)

[Hector Hugh Munro](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hector-hugh-munro/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d5/hector-hugh-munro-11761_birth_it-occurred-to-me-that-i-would-like-to-b_1708646.jpg)

> [Women who earn a certificate or degree from a community college, especially in STEM-related field, will be ready to move into a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-biden/women-who-earn-a-certificate-or-degree-from-a-community-college/)

[Jill Biden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-biden/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8b0/jill-biden-4577_certificates_women-who-earn-a-certificate-or-degree-f_2951120.png)

> [The world does not run on the number of certificates one has, but on the skills our hands have. Let the youth…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/narendra-modi/the-world-does-not-run-on-the-number-of-certificates-one-has-but-on/)

[Narendra Modi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/narendra-modi/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/540/narendra-modi-250_aim_the-world-does-not-run-on-the-number-of_420439.jpg)

> [Now the seasons are closing their files on each of us, the heavy drawers full of certificates rolling back into the tree…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ted-kooser/now-the-seasons-are-closing-their-files-on-each-of-us-the-heavy/)

[Ted Kooser](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ted-kooser/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0d7/ted-kooser-16216_bicycle_now-the-seasons-are-closing-their-files_1883214.jpg)

> [This whole business of Trade gives me to pause and think, as it constitutes false relations between men; inasmuch as I am…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ralph-waldo-emerson/this-whole-business-of-trade-gives-me-to-pause-and-think-as-it/)

[Ralph Waldo Emerson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ralph-waldo-emerson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6b4/ralph-waldo-emerson-6_aids_this-whole-business-of-trade-gives-me-to_780797.jpg)

> [ \[Lennie meets Joe - he works out that she was named after John Lennon\] I nod. "Mom was a hippie." This is… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jandy-nelson/lennie-meets-joe-he-works-out-that-she-was-named-after-john-lennon-i/)

[Jandy Nelson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jandy-nelson/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/184/jandy-nelson-1913_birth_lennie-meets-joe-he-works-out-that-she-w_1625792.jpg)

> [ I have people that have been studying \[Obama's birth certificate\] and they cannot believe what they're finding... I would like to have… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-trump/i-have-people-that-have-been-studying-obama-s-birth-certificate-and/)

[Donald Trump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-trump/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4eb/donald-trump-18_being-honest_i-have-people-that-have-been-studying-ob_64831.jpg)

> [How old are you? If your first reflex is to reply with your chronological age, the number on your birth certificate, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/deepak-chopra/how-old-are-you-if-your-first-reflex-is-to-reply-with-your/)

[Deepak Chopra](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/deepak-chopra/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8c3/deepak-chopra-63_age_how-old-are-you-if-your-first-reflex-is_2509916.jpg)

> [If your only nice to the people that are nice to you, big deal; what do you want, a gist certificate? Everyone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-bytheway/if-your-only-nice-to-the-people-that-are-nice-to-you-big-deal-what-do/)

[John Bytheway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-bytheway/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f22/john-bytheway-10653_big-deal_if-your-only-nice-to-the-people-that-are_3226416.png)

> [Annie turned away, her eyes glittering. 'Here's what no one tells you,' she said. 'When you deliver a fetus, you get a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jodi-picoult/annie-turned-away-her-eyes-glittering-here-s-what-no-one-tells-you/)

[Jodi Picoult](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jodi-picoult/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7f6/jodi-picoult-45_ache_annie-turned-away-her-eyes-glittering-he_1028474.jpg)

> [ Sidney Blumenthal is very close friend of Secretary \[Hillary\] Clinton. And her campaign manager, Patti Doyle, went to - during the campaign,… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-trump/sidney-blumenthal-is-very-close-friend-of-secretary-hillary-clinton/)

[Donald Trump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-trump/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7fe/donald-trump-18_barack_sidney-blumenthal-is-very-close-friend-o_363769.jpg)

> [No one has ever asked to see my degree certificate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-hockney/no-one-has-ever-asked-to-see-my-degree-certificate/)

[David Hockney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-hockney/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b33/david-hockney-1395_asked_no-one-has-ever-asked-to-see-my-degree-c_1944277.png)

> [Vickie Lynn Hogan is my birth certificate's name.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-nicole-smith/vickie-lynn-hogan-is-my-birth-certificate-s-name/)

[Anna Nicole Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-nicole-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/223/anna-nicole-smith-17080_birth_vickie-lynn-hogan-is-my-birth-certificat_1252720.jpg)

> [Suicide is what the death certificate says when one dies of depression.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-d-kramer/suicide-is-what-the-death-certificate-says-when-one-dies-of-depression/)

[Peter D. Kramer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-d-kramer/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bdd/peter-d-kramer-46575_bipolar_suicide-is-what-the-death-certificate-sa_1222968.jpg)

> [A verbal threat is the most authentic certificate of impotence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nassim-nicholas-taleb/a-verbal-threat-is-the-most-authentic-certificate-of-impotence/)

[Nassim Nicholas Taleb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nassim-nicholas-taleb/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c35/nassim-nicholas-taleb-352_certificates_a-verbal-threat-is-the-most-authentic-ce_2610029.png)

> [Peace is a certificate you get in the grave.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-tosh/peace-is-a-certificate-you-get-in-the-grave/)

[Peter Tosh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-tosh/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ce8/peter-tosh-8773_certificate_peace-is-a-certificate-you-get-in-the-gr_2365766.jpg)

> [I've never won many awards, I didn't get certificates for swimming or anything.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karl-pilkington/i-ve-never-won-many-awards-i-didn-t-get-certificates-for-swimming-or/)

[Karl Pilkington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karl-pilkington/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/03d/karl-pilkington-1541_anything_i-ve-never-won-many-awards-i-didn-t-get_1123380.png)

> [There are few things in life that are harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barack-obama/there-are-few-things-in-life-that-are-harder-to-find-and-more/)

[Barack Obama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barack-obama/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c4a/barack-obama-17_birth_there-are-few-things-in-life-that-are-ha_1648867.jpg)

> [Every sect is a certificate that God has not plainly revealed his will to man. To each reader the Bible conveys a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-green-ingersoll/every-sect-is-a-certificate-that-god-has-not-plainly-revealed-his/)

[Robert Green Ingersoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-green-ingersoll/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/564/robert-green-ingersoll-361_bible_every-sect-is-a-certificate-that-god-has_1379872.png)

## Top authors on Certificates

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                        "text": "I was an ugly baby. On my birth certificate there was a listing for Probable Cause.",
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                            "name": "Ronnie Shakes"
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                        "text": "I don't know how old I am because a goat ate the Bible that had my birth certificate in it. The goat lived to be twenty-seven.",
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                        "text": "I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.",
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                        "text": "I've started collecting taxidermy: I've got a red squirrel, called Steve. I made sure he came with certificates so we know he wasn't just killed for stuffing.",
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                        "text": "I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.",
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                        "text": "I was trying to find out who my father was. They say that at that time, that if you are illegitimate, the father doesn't have to put his name down on the certificate.",
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                        "text": "Donald Trump brought up the issue of the birth certificate and it's getting huge buzz around the country. Even Chris Matthews has called for, you know, the birth certificate to be released. Why can't they just release the birth certificate, you know, and just move on?",
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                        "text": "The world is deathly ill. It is dying. The Great Physician has already signed the death certificate. Yet, there is still a great work for Christians to do. They are to be streams of living water, channels of mercy to those who are still in the world. It is possible for them to do this because they are overcomers.",
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                        "text": "The umlaut isn't on my birth certificate. I had this book as a child called Chloe and Maude, and there was an umlaut on the e, and I said, I want that! It's a little flair. Just to confuse people even more.",
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                        "text": "The calf scramble will be during both rodeo performances and consist of children attempting to catch and halter several loose calves. If a child succeeds, he or she will receive a certificate to purchase a breeding animal to raise and bring back to the livestock show next year.",
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                        "text": "The online credential, the online certificate is very different from an on campus certificate. And we really believe that online learning and the EdX platform and the EdX portal, these are ways in which - you can think of them as a rising tide that's going to lift all boats whether for students worldwide or on our campuses.",
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                        "text": "It occurred to me that I would like to be a poet. The chief qualification, I understand is that you must be born. Well, I hunted up my birth certificate, and found that I was all right on that score.",
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                        "text": "Women who earn a certificate or degree from a community college, especially in STEM-related field, will be ready to move into a good-paying job in the growing global economy. Community colleges also offer mentorship and support that goes far beyond the classroom.",
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                        "text": "The world does not run on the number of certificates one has, but on the skills our hands have. Let the youth dream big and aim for the sky. The work of a government should be to open doors.",
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                        "text": "Now the seasons are closing their files on each of us, the heavy drawers full of certificates rolling back into the tree trunks, a few old papers flocking away. Someone we loved has fallen from our thoughts, making a little, glittering splash like a bicycle pushed by a breeze. Otherwise, not much has happened; we fell in love again, finding that one red feather on the wind.",
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                        "text": "This whole business of Trade gives me to pause and think, as it constitutes false relations between men; inasmuch as I am prone tocount myself relieved of any responsibility to behave well and nobly to that person who I pay with money, whereas if I had not that commodity, I should be put on my good behavior in all companies, and man would be a benefactor to man, as being himself his only certificate that he had a right to those aids and services which each asked of the other.",
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                        "text": "[Lennie meets Joe - he works out that she was named after John Lennon] I nod. \"Mom was a hippie.\" This is northern Northern California after all - the final frontier of freakerdom. Just in the eleventh grade we have a girl named Electricity, a guy named Magic Bus, and countless flowers: Tulip, Begonia, and Poppy - all parent-given-on-the-birth-certificate names. Tulip is a two-ton bruiser of a guy who would be the star of out football team if we were the kind of school that has optional morning meditation in the gym",
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                        "text": "I have people that have been studying [Obama's birth certificate] and they cannot believe what they're finding... I would like to have him show his birth certificate, and can I be honest with you, I hope he can. Because if he can't, if he can't, if he wasn't born in this country, which is a real possibility…then he has pulled one of the great cons in the history of politics.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "How old are you? If your first reflex is to reply with your chronological age, the number on your birth certificate, you are only one-third correct. There are actually two additional, and more important, indicators of age. And the exciting news is that it is within your power to adjust both of these other \"age indicators\" and truly grow younger and live longer.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If your only nice to the people that are nice to you, big deal; what do you want, a gist certificate? Everyone does that. And if you only say \"hi\" in the hall to the people that say hi to you, what are doing more than anyone else? Maybe you know people who are different when they're alone than when they're with their friends. they might say \"hi\" to you if your alone, but with a group they act like they've never seen you.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Annie turned away, her eyes glittering. 'Here's what no one tells you,' she said. 'When you deliver a fetus, you get a death certificate, but not a birth certificate. And afterward, your milk comes in, and there's nothing you can do to stop it.' She looked up at me. 'You can't win. Either you have the baby and wear your pain on the outside, or you don't have the baby, and you keep that ache in you forever. I know I didn't do the wrong thing. But I don't feel like I did the right thing, either.",
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                        "text": "Sidney Blumenthal is very close friend of Secretary [Hillary] Clinton. And her campaign manager, Patti Doyle, went to - during the campaign, her campaign against President [Barak] Obama, fought very hard. If you look at CNN this past week, Patti Solis Doyle was on Wolf Blitzer saying that this happened. Blumenthal sent McClatchy, highly respected reporter at McClatchy, to Kenya to find out about it.She failed to get the birth certificate.When I got involved, I didn't fail. I got him to give the birth certificate [of Barack Obama]. So I'm satisfied with it.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "No one has ever asked to see my degree certificate.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Vickie Lynn Hogan is my birth certificate's name.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Suicide is what the death certificate says when one dies of depression.",
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