--- title: "17 Car Quotes By Dave Barry" description: "17 Car quotes by Dave Barry. Plus more from Dave Barry and more Car sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a6/dave-barry-222_auto-racing_auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car_408099.png" --- > [Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car-is-going-at-least-172-miles/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a6/dave-barry-222_auto-racing_auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car_408099.png) > [Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-inside-a-car-wash/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cef/dave-barry-222_car_miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-i_3073553.png) > [I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/i-want-a-pit-crew-i-hate-the-procedure-i-currently-have-to-go-through/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d65/dave-barry-222_car_i-want-a-pit-crew-i-hate-the-procedure-i_364395.png) > [...Terry Jackson, who is the Miami Herald's automotive writer and TV critic. That's correct: This man gets paid to drive new cars…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/terry-jackson-who-is-the-miami-herald-s-automotive-writer-and-tv/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c1e/dave-barry-222_bigs_terry-jackson-who-is-the-miami-herald-s_394499.jpg) > [Real cars were made here in America: Fords, Chevys, Plymouths. These were large chunks of Detroit iron - cars that had the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/real-cars-were-made-here-in-america-fords-chevys-plymouths-these-were/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cb7/dave-barry-222_aircraft_real-cars-were-made-here-in-america-ford_1331441.jpg) > [There are also a number of humans living up there (Canada), and in many ways they have a lifestyle quite similar to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/there-are-also-a-number-of-humans-living-up-there-canada-and-in-many/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0f4/dave-barry-222_activity_there-are-also-a-number-of-humans-living_1534755.png) > [Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/dogs-feel-very-strongly-that-they-should-always-go-with-you-in-the/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e02/dave-barry-222_animal_dogs-feel-very-strongly-that-they-should_2243969.png) > [We have always had dogs, and they have faithfully performed many valuable services for us, such as: 1. Peeing on everything. 2.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-faithfully-performed-many/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/dave-barry-222_animal_we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-fa_956923.jpg) > [Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will dead-end in a Disney parking area large enough to have its own…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventually-it-will-dead-end-in-a/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acb/dave-barry-222_administration_just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventu_2090957.jpg) > [Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a-teenager-an-actual-volcanic/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/dave-barry-222_band_teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a_256931.png) > [The average tax payer is not a big voluntary supporter of the arts. The only art that the average taxpayer buys voluntarily…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-voluntary-supporter-of-the-arts/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db2/dave-barry-222_art_the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-volun_2327434.jpg) > [The Ford Falcon holds the proud title of Slowest Car Ever Built. In certain areas of the country you can go to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of-slowest-car-ever-built-in/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f09/dave-barry-222_areas_the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of_2740076.png) > [You should definitely have a travel agent. Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels, and rental-car agencies yourself,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agent-why-go-through-all-the/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaa/dave-barry-222_agency_you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agen_161962.png) > [Technology is constantly improving our lives. Look at the cellular telephone. Just ten years ago, virtually nobody was able to get into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/technology-is-constantly-improving-our-lives-look-at-the-cellular/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/101/dave-barry-222_able_technology-is-constantly-improving-our-l_576027.png) > [Here in Miami, on weekends, amusement-seekers will come to the marina, set up folding chairs, and spend a highly entertaining day watching…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seekers-will-come-to-the-marina/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/899/dave-barry-222_amusement_here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seek_3190382.png) > [Every year I write a tax advice column and I used to always make fun of that. One year, one of my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-and-i-used-to-always-make-fun/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/320/dave-barry-222_advice_every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-a_1169988.jpg) > [The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-democrats-seem-to-be-basically-nicer-people-but-they-have/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c4a/dave-barry-222_bother_the-democrats-seem-to-be-basically-nicer_748201.jpg) ## Other authors on Car ## More by Dave Barry > [This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/this-is-true-virtually-all-edible-substances-and-many-automotive/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/this-ball-was-so-crowded-that-it-took-me-a-trained-professional/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [The hardest thing about being a guy is that women don't accept that you really are just a simple, pathetic, labrador retriever-like creature. That…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-hardest-thing-about-being-a-guy-is-that-women-don-t-accept-that/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-ultimate-camping-trip-was-the-lewis-and-clark-expedition/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/although-golf-was-originally-restricted-to-wealthy-overweight/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/entire-new-continent-can-emerge-from-the-ocean-in-the-time-it-takes/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [He was distracted by a giggle, and turned to see a rare sight: a girl.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/he-was-distracted-by-a-giggle-and-turned-to-see-a-rare-sight-a-girl/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-major-parties-could-conduct-live-human-sacrifices-on-their/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/if-you-look-at-any-list-of-great-modern-writers-such-as-ernest/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/don-t-you-wish-you-had-a-job-like-mine-all-you-have-to-do-is-think-up/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [“Despite the gulf, physical and cultural, between the United States and Japan, both societies are, in the end, made up of people, and people…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/despite-the-gulf-physical-and-cultural-between-the-united-states-and/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/before-going-on-a-diet-you-should-consult-your-doctor-or-at-least/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Never trust anything you read in a travel article.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/never-trust-anything-you-read-in-a-travel-article/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it "Christmas" and went to church; the Jews called it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/in-the-old-days-it-was-not-called-the-holiday-season-the-christians/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) > [Always remember that if editors were so damned smart, they would know how to dress.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/always-remember-that-if-editors-were-so-damned-smart-they-would-know/) [Dave Barry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dave-barry/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/car/dave-barry/#itemlist", "name": "17 Car Quotes By Dave Barry", "numberOfItems": 17, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car-is-going-at-least-172-miles/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a6/dave-barry-222_auto-racing_auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car_408099.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a6/dave-barry-222_auto-racing_auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car_408099.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a6/dave-barry-222_auto-racing_auto-racing-is-boring-except-when-a-car_408099.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-inside-a-car-wash/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cef/dave-barry-222_car_miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-i_3073553.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cef/dave-barry-222_car_miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-i_3073553.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cef/dave-barry-222_car_miami-drivers-will-attempt-to-pass-you-i_3073553.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I want a pit crew... 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Peeing on everything. 2. When we're driving in our car, alerting us that we have passed another dog by barking real loud in our ears for the next 114 miles. 3. Trying to kill the Avon lady.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-faithfully-performed-many/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/dave-barry-222_animal_we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-fa_956923.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/dave-barry-222_animal_we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-fa_956923.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fd3/dave-barry-222_animal_we-have-always-had-dogs-and-they-have-fa_956923.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“We have always had dogs, and they have faithfully performed many valuable services for us, such as: 1…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will dead-end in a Disney parking area large enough to have its own climate, populated by large nomadic families who have been trying to find their cars since the Carter administration.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventually-it-will-dead-end-in-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acb/dave-barry-222_administration_just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventu_2090957.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acb/dave-barry-222_administration_just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventu_2090957.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acb/dave-barry-222_administration_just-get-on-any-major-highway-and-eventu_2090957.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Just get on any major highway, and eventually it will dead-end in a Disney parking area large enough to have…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring giant billowing clouds of smoke, hot rocks raining from the sky, lava floes destroying entire villages, etc., and the teenager, eyebrows arched with sarcasm, will look at you and say, \"Gee, this is swell,\" then return to the rental car, turn on his portable CD player, and listen to a band called Stomach Contents.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a-teenager-an-actual-volcanic/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/dave-barry-222_band_teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a_256931.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/dave-barry-222_band_teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a_256931.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0b1/dave-barry-222_band_teenagers-are-bored-by-everything-show-a_256931.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Teenagers are bored. By everything. Show a teenager an actual volcanic eruption, in progress, featuring…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The average tax payer is not a big voluntary supporter of the arts. The only art that the average taxpayer buys voluntarily either has a picture of Bart Simpson on it or little suction cups on its feet so you can stick it onto a car window.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-voluntary-supporter-of-the-arts/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db2/dave-barry-222_art_the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-volun_2327434.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db2/dave-barry-222_art_the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-volun_2327434.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/db2/dave-barry-222_art_the-average-tax-payer-is-not-a-big-volun_2327434.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The average tax payer is not a big voluntary supporter of the arts. The only art that the average taxpayer…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The Ford Falcon holds the proud title of Slowest Car Ever Built. In certain areas of the country you can go to a stoplight and find Falcon drivers who pressed down on their accelerators in 1963 and are still waiting for their cars to move.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of-slowest-car-ever-built-in/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f09/dave-barry-222_areas_the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of_2740076.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f09/dave-barry-222_areas_the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of_2740076.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f09/dave-barry-222_areas_the-ford-falcon-holds-the-proud-title-of_2740076.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The Ford Falcon holds the proud title of Slowest Car Ever Built. In certain areas of the country you can go…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You should definitely have a travel agent. Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels, and rental-car agencies yourself, only to see the arrangements get all screwed up, when with just a single phone call you can have a trained professional screw them up for you?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agent-why-go-through-all-the/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaa/dave-barry-222_agency_you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agen_161962.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaa/dave-barry-222_agency_you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agen_161962.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaa/dave-barry-222_agency_you-should-definitely-have-a-travel-agen_161962.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You should definitely have a travel agent. Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Technology is constantly improving our lives. Look at the cellular telephone. Just ten years ago, virtually nobody was able to get into a car crash caused by trying to steer and dial at the same time; today, people do this all the time.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/technology-is-constantly-improving-our-lives-look-at-the-cellular/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/101/dave-barry-222_able_technology-is-constantly-improving-our-l_576027.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/101/dave-barry-222_able_technology-is-constantly-improving-our-l_576027.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/101/dave-barry-222_able_technology-is-constantly-improving-our-l_576027.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Technology is constantly improving our lives. Look at the cellular telephone. Just ten years ago, virtually…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Here in Miami, on weekends, amusement-seekers will come to the marina, set up folding chairs, and spend a highly entertaining day watching boat owners perform comical maneuvers such as forgetting to set their parking brakes and having their cars roll down the ramp and disappear, burbling gaily, below the surface.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seekers-will-come-to-the-marina/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/899/dave-barry-222_amusement_here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seek_3190382.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/899/dave-barry-222_amusement_here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seek_3190382.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/899/dave-barry-222_amusement_here-in-miami-on-weekends-amusement-seek_3190382.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Here in Miami, on weekends, amusement-seekers will come to the marina, set up folding chairs, and spend a…” — Dave Barry", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Every year I write a tax advice column and I used to always make fun of that. One year, one of my favorite IRS commissioners, I think his name was Roscoe somebody, wrote that one of the most often-asked questions by taxpayers was, \"How can I contribute more?\" Well, I tell ya, ol' Roscoe's really been doing situps under parked cars again. I've heard a lot of people ask a lot of questions about taxes, but I never heard anybody say, \"How can I, the ordinary person, send more money for no reason?\"", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Dave Barry" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dave-barry/every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-and-i-used-to-always-make-fun/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/320/dave-barry-222_advice_every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-a_1169988.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/320/dave-barry-222_advice_every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-a_1169988.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/320/dave-barry-222_advice_every-year-i-write-a-tax-advice-column-a_1169988.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Every year I write a tax advice column and I used to always make fun of that. 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